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Post-S3, emo!Merlin hurt/comfort. Arthur is planning to marry Gwen, Merlin tries to be happy for them but can't help being a little heartbroken. Arthur is also spending more time with his new knights, Merlin has more duties than ever and has to watch everyone else take the credit and endure Arthur calling him useless while he is still unable to reveal how much he has helped with his magic. One day Arthur finds him crying somewhere in the castle and comforts him. Anon would like cuddling and kissing please.
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Merlin can't keep up this pretence of normality. There's too much pretence in his life already and he just can't, not anymore, not tonight at least. He doesn't even realise that more tears are falling until he feels the soft swipe of Arthur's thumb brushing them away.
"Don't, Merlin. Please don't." And there's that sincere, vulnerable note to his voice that Merlin doesn't hear often enough. He wants to curl up and bury his head against Arthur's chest and cry it out but he won't, will not humiliate himself further ( ... )
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Merlin hasn't imagined Arthur kissing him. Hasn't permitted himself that liberty. These feelings he even now can barely acknowledge to himself have crept up slowly and stealthily, with no time for idle fantasies of what can never be. Except that now it is, a shock of heat against his mouth, chapped lips, rough and shaky. Arthur's hands cup his face as his tongue slides into Merlin's mouth. Merlin can't help the small moan that escapes him as the last of his walls crumble and he kisses back with a flush of fierce longing ( ... )
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