"I'm Still Malfoy"-- an H/D-based song parody
Title: I'm Still Malfoy
Word Count 335
Author's Notes: Lyrics as sung by one Draco Malfoy (in a Harry/Draco context). To the tune of Brad Paisley's "I'm Still a Guy". Click here for the song if you're unfamiliar with the tune. This is pure crack, by the way. It hit me the other morning as I woke up and just would not let go. I also apologise for the Americanism--I needed it for rhythm. Didn't sound right with the British equivalent.
Disclaimer: Done for fun, not profit. Characters belong to JKR et al. Original song performed by Brad Paisley. Parodies are fair use and all that.
I'm Still Malfoy
When you see my father, you see evil
I see the man who taught me to taunt
When you see Dark Magic, you fight it
I see a way to get what I want
You're probably thinking that you're going to change me
In some ways, well maybe you might
I'll back down, I'll shut up, oh, but no matter what
Remember, I'm still Malfoy
You think all people are equal
And I think that's just not the case
Purebloods are better, don't try to deny it
Just look at this pale, handsome face
Well, love makes a man do some things he's not proud of
And in a weak moment I might
Admit I fell in love, that it's you that I want
But remember, I'm still Malfoy
I'll kiss you in public,
Use sweet terms of endearment,
Send an owl with Chocolate Frogs
Then open my mouth and insult your blood-line
'Cause you ruined my argyle socks
I can hear you now talking to Granger
Saying, 'Hermione, he's come a long way
From cheating at Quidditch and taunting the Weasleys
And fawning over Daddy's pimp cane.'
But when you set down rules you expect me to follow
And you seem surprised when I lie
Well now, what can I say, at the end of the day,
Harry, I'm still Malfoy
I'll watch Muggle TV shows,
I'll put up with your friends,
Even the ones I despise
Then I'll punish some House Elves because they deserved it
Though they're not even half of my size
I don't go to Death Eater meetings
That's just no longer my thing
I don't fight the Light, though try as I might
I can't keep my narrow nose clean
With all of these wizards lining up just to meet you
It's hard not to be scandalised
I've got perfect blond hair
And I'm still an heir
Yeah, Harry, I'm still Malfoy
Oh, I'll bottom, I'll top
But I'll scheme till I drop
Thank Merlin, I'm still Malfoy
Word Count 335
Author's Notes: Lyrics as sung by one Draco Malfoy (in a Harry/Draco context). To the tune of Brad Paisley's "I'm Still a Guy". Click here for the song if you're unfamiliar with the tune. This is pure crack, by the way. It hit me the other morning as I woke up and just would not let go. I also apologise for the Americanism--I needed it for rhythm. Didn't sound right with the British equivalent.
Disclaimer: Done for fun, not profit. Characters belong to JKR et al. Original song performed by Brad Paisley. Parodies are fair use and all that.
I'm Still Malfoy
When you see my father, you see evil
I see the man who taught me to taunt
When you see Dark Magic, you fight it
I see a way to get what I want
You're probably thinking that you're going to change me
In some ways, well maybe you might
I'll back down, I'll shut up, oh, but no matter what
Remember, I'm still Malfoy
You think all people are equal
And I think that's just not the case
Purebloods are better, don't try to deny it
Just look at this pale, handsome face
Well, love makes a man do some things he's not proud of
And in a weak moment I might
Admit I fell in love, that it's you that I want
But remember, I'm still Malfoy
I'll kiss you in public,
Use sweet terms of endearment,
Send an owl with Chocolate Frogs
Then open my mouth and insult your blood-line
'Cause you ruined my argyle socks
I can hear you now talking to Granger
Saying, 'Hermione, he's come a long way
From cheating at Quidditch and taunting the Weasleys
And fawning over Daddy's pimp cane.'
But when you set down rules you expect me to follow
And you seem surprised when I lie
Well now, what can I say, at the end of the day,
Harry, I'm still Malfoy
I'll watch Muggle TV shows,
I'll put up with your friends,
Even the ones I despise
Then I'll punish some House Elves because they deserved it
Though they're not even half of my size
I don't go to Death Eater meetings
That's just no longer my thing
I don't fight the Light, though try as I might
I can't keep my narrow nose clean
With all of these wizards lining up just to meet you
It's hard not to be scandalised
I've got perfect blond hair
And I'm still an heir
Yeah, Harry, I'm still Malfoy
Oh, I'll bottom, I'll top
But I'll scheme till I drop
Thank Merlin, I'm still Malfoy