The Idea-o-max 5000

[kelly_swails]

This past Saturday I attended a surprise birthday party for my stepdad. Sure, the cake and wine and DJ were fun and all, but towards the end of the festivities I found a newfangled-story-idea-generator that I'm going to patent.

It's called a five-year-old.

The conversation started innocently enough. A boy was asked what he was going to be for

Comments

Golden Dragons

[anonymous]

Potion of Golden Dragon control, of course. Duh.

Absent that, toss a bag of holding into a portable hole (nuclear explosion results).

Absent that, teleport boulder, vat of acid, or another dragon into the innards of Golden Dragon. Messy but effective.

Absent that, mimic sound of baby Golden Dragon being held hostage and make a deal for it to banish itself for the youngling's life.

Absent that, take all your dice and go home.

C'mon, you've spent time with gamers. This is how they think, even when they're just thinking about their boss in the real world.

Don Bingle
Author of Tales of Gamers and Gaming

Re: Golden Dragons

[kelly_swails]

I especially like the Baby Hostage Ploy. Which, of course, assumes that the Golden Dragon is able to have babies. What if they're sterile? Then the ruse is completely ineffective and worse, you look like an idiot. (Idiots are tender. Everyone knows that.) I didn't get a chance to cover the reproductive cycle of dragons with the five-year-old.

[malkatsheva]

I'm thinking, maybe a crack team of Rainbow Ninjas. They can fly, you know.

[kelly_swails]

I think you're on to something.