Fic: Catching Fire, Ch. 21b/22.
Previous chapters: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12
13 14a 14b 15 16a 16b 17a 17b 18a 18b 19 20 21a
WARNING for medical scenes and trauma to a main character
This chapter is posted in three parts. This is part 2/3.
Day 12
Len’s phone jarred him out of deep sleep at four a.m. The caller ID showed the call was from the hospital. His heart pounded, and his hands shook so badly it was difficult to push the button to answer the call.
“Hello? What’s wrong?”
“Leonard, this is Cindy Granger, one of the night nurses on Jim’s unit. He’s not feeling well right now-he’s running a temperature-and he’s asking for you. He’s pretty agitated.”
“I’m on my way,” Len said. An infection could be deadly at this point, and he and Jim both knew it. “Is it an infection?”
“We don’t know. Dr. Isaacs is on his way as well. Jim does have some upper respiratory symptoms, so we’re all hoping it’s just a virus.”
“I’ll be there in ten minutes.”
Leonard made it in eight. He dashed up the stairs, too impatient for the elevator, and was panting by the time he burst through the double doors.
“Whoa, slow down, Leonard,” the nurse said. “Dr. Isaacs is in with him. You can go in, but you’ll need a mask and gown, because he’s taking a look under the dressings.”
“Aw, Jim,” Len muttered. “What happened?” he asked the nurse. “He was doing so well! He was ten times better yesterday!”
“We’re not sure yet. Dr. Isaacs should know soon. Do you want to go in, or do you want to wait outside until they’re done?”
“Of course I want to go in,” Len said. He went to the cabinet that had sterile packages of masks and gowns, and pulled a set out. He scrubbed his hands, and the nurse helped him into the garment, and put gloves on him.
“Thanks.” Without even looking at the nurse who’d assisted him, Leonard flew into Jim’s room. Jim was leaned forward in the position that worked best for dressing changes, teeth clenched and eyes shut tightly. His hands were clenched into fists, knuckles white, and he groaned as Dr. Isaacs peeled the bandages back as gently as possible.
Len knelt down so he was right by Jim’s head.
“Jim, darlin’. I came as fast as I could. You’re feelin’ pretty shitty, huh.”
“Bones,” Jim gasped. “Do the snow-day thing.”
Len launched into the routine he’d started the first day Jim was awake, and had used many times since, when Jim was having his dressings changed, or was feeling more pain than normal for some reason. He talked about playing outside together on a snowy day, and then snuggling up together afterwards. He’d made the imagery more and more detailed each time, and gave it his all on this occasion. He had Jim making snow angels, and building a snowman, and then they lay in the snow together and watched the flakes falling. Jim’s knuckles regained some color, and his breathing slowed and got less ragged as Leonard walked him through their winter wonderland.
Len watched out of the corner of his eye as Dr. Isaacs swabbed a few spots, likely to culture for any bacterial growth, dropping each swab into a labeled tube.
“All right, Jim,” Isaacs said, finally. “I’m all done poking you. Everything still looks really good under there, but I took some swabs to culture, just as a precaution, since you’re We’ll get you bandaged up again, and try to get you feeling a little better, and then we can talk a little more, all right?”
“Yeah,” Jim said, his voice sounding more normal.
Len stayed with Jim as two nurses re-dressed his injuries, which took about an hour. Jim coughed a few times during the procedure, which caused him to tense up and breathe harder again.
“Hurts when you cough, huh?” Len said.
“Yeah. I think I’m sick. Shitty timing.” He coughed again. “Fuck.”
Dr. Isaacs came in again after the bandaging was complete.
“Jim, Len; I honestly think this is a virus. But I’m going to start you on some prophylactic broad-spectrum antibiotics, Jim, just to prevent any secondary infections. I’ll be surprised if there’s any growth in the cultures; usually, if there’s an infection in the wounds, it’s visible before there are any systemic effects. You do have a fever, but it started along with upper respiratory symptoms. But we’ll know in forty-eight hours if the wounds are infected, which, again, I doubt.”
“That sounds reasonable,” Len said. “Can you do something for the cough?”
“Jim?” Dr. Isaacs asked. “Is that cough bothering you a fair amount?”
“Yeah,” Jim said, coughing again. “There’s this reflex, you know, to cover your mouth? But when I do that, it stretches everything out all of a sudden. I know I’m supposed to work on range of motion, but I don’t think sudden jerky movements is what the PTs had in mind. Plus I guess just plain coughing hurts.”
“Is it hurting inside your chest, or on the wounds themselves?”
“Just my back and shoulders,” Jim said. “And I sneezed earlier, and I’d prefer not to repeat that for, oh, another hundred years or so.”
“All right. Your cough is pretty junky-sounding, so I don’t want to suppress it too hard, since your body needs to get the extra secretions out. But I think the best balance will be a small dose of codeine, along with something to loosen up the phlegm. The codeine will suppress the cough, and take the edge off the pain, as well. I know you were glad to get off the opiates, but I really think this is the best option for now. I’ll also have the respiratory therapist come in and see you today; they’ll help you clear out the secretions, and give you some breathing exercises that will help stave off pneumonia.”
“Pneumonia?” Jim said, eyes widening. “Do you think I’m getting pneumonia?”
“Not at all,” Isaacs said. “But shallow breathing, and not coughing, plus an upper respiratory infection, plus the lowered immunity you have now anyhow, make it a possible complication. But the antibiotics and the breathing exercises should take care of that. Okay?”
“Yeah,” Jim said. He coughed again, and closed his eyes. “Yeah, let’s do something about this cough.”
“All right. Codeine and guaifenesin, coming right up.”
Two hours later, at a time of day that was approaching decent, Jim was feeling a little better. His cold symptoms had become full blown, but the cough was better.
“I guess maybe I overdid it yesterday,” Jim admitted, once it was just him and Len in the room for a while.
“Nobody’s saying that, Jim.”
“I am. I started to feel a little, I don’t know, not so great, yesterday afternoon, after Ronnie left. But I just kept pushing through the day, because I was having such a good day. Guess maybe I learned a lesson.” Jim blew his nose, and added the tissue to the pile on his lap.
“I think that’s a dangerous day-the day when you’re first really starting to feel better,” Len said.
Jim snorted. “Ronnie said the same thing. He kept tryin’ to get me to slow down, lie down for a while. Said he did the same thing, the first day he was really feeling better. And that he felt like crap the next day. And hell, he lost an entire body part! I just got burned, is all.”
Len frowned. “You know, he didn’t lose any organs. You lost a third of the largest organ in your body. The one that keeps things in that are supposed to stay in, and keeps things out that are supposed to stay out. I’m not tryin’ to give you an excuse for oneupmanship, but pretty much any physician would say there’s no comparison, in the initial stages. Which I feel compelled to point out you’re still in.”
“Yeah, yeah; all right. Anyhow. Subject change. Sort of. You know what Ronnie’s doing?”
Len shook his head. “No, what?”
“He’s going back to college in the fall! He did a couple years at the U of I before he went to the fire academy, but he’s going back!”
“That’s terrific, Jim. For a while, he sounded like he was kind of at a loss for what to do with himself.”
“Yeah.” Jim sighed. “Speaking of which. I’ve kinda been thinkin’ about some stuff.”
“About what you’re going to do?”
“Uh huh. I’m not gonna try to go back to the job, Bones.”
Len froze. He’d been assuming that Jim would do anything he could possibly do, put himself through any rehab that would help, to be able to do the officers’ training on the next cycle.
“You’re not?” Len said, frowning.
“I’m not. I just …” Jim closed his eyes, which was his new way of looking away, since he couldn’t yet move his neck comfortably.
“Just what, darlin’? It’s your choice; I’ll support you no matter what you choose.” Len caressed Jim’s cheek with his gloved hand.
“I don’t ever want to be near a fire again, Bones. I just don’t. Maybe I could probably find some way to get past that fear, but to be honest, I don’t want to. The idea of gearing up and purposely going towards a fire, into a burning building? I … can’t do that anymore. I’m not that guy anymore.” He opened his eyes again, and took Len’s hand.
“I talked to Sylvia a lot, over the last couple days,” Jim continued. “It was … it was hard to admit I’m not that guy any more. But I’m not. I’m sorry.”
Len smiled, and shook his head. “You don’t have to worry about what I’m gonna think about that, Jim. You know I’ll support you, no matter what. But if you don’t wanna go back to that craziness, well, that’s fine with me. And it sure as hell doesn't make you any less of a man in my book. I didn’t fall in love with you because you’re a kick-ass macho heroic fireman stud who looks hot in turnouts.”
“Smoking hot,” Jim said. “Last time I wore turnout gear, I was literally smoking.”
Len rolled his eyes. “You’re unbelievable, you know that?”
“Yep. But my point is: I honest to goodness thought about whether I wanted to try to go back. And once I got past the … I don’t know, the shame, I guess, of feeling like I was a weakling for saying I didn’t want to even try, I was fine with it.”
“You talk about that with Ronnie at all?” Len asked.
“Yeah. I was really glad he was there yesterday. Because he had the same thing, you know? He could’ve tried to requalify-there are actually a few career firefighters with prostheses of various kinds. But he went through the same thought process as I did. And we both thought about what we’d be putting our families through by trying to go back.”
“Yeah,” Len said, “your mom will be really relieved to hear your decision.”
Jim sighed. “I meant you, Bones.”
“Me?”
“No, the other Bones-see? The lady from that TV show is right behind you. Yes, you, you idiot.”
“Oh,” Len said. “Oh.” He frowned, as he considered what Jim had just said. “But Jim, if you’re not going to be happy doing something else, and you’re not trying to go back to the fire service because you think I-”
“Auuugh! Bones! Were you not listening to anything I just said? I decided not to go back, because it’s the best choice, for about a thousand reasons. And yes, you’re a big part of that. When I was lying there, under that bookcase, starting to cook, I thought, ‘I gotta get outta this. Gotta get back to Bones.’ I wasn’t thinking of my mother, or my brother, or the boys, or my car. It was you, Bones. Just you.”
Len blinked a few times, and then stood up, pushed his mask up, and kissed Jim, as thoroughly as he could given the situation. It was inadvisable, but necessary.
“Are you insane?” Jim said. “I’m sick! Lord only knows what I’ve got.”
“You’ve got me, is what you’ve got,” Len said. “Forever. Whether you like it or not.”
“And now you’ve got my cooties.”
Len gazed intensely at Jim.
“What, Bones?”
“Marry me,” Len said.
Jim blinked once, and again. “When?”
“As soon as we can get the paperwork done. Tomorrow. The next day.”
“Yes.”
“Really?” Len asked.
“Really,” Jim said. “Unless you didn’t mean it. ‘Cause you know, I understand that whole blurting things out phenomenon.”
“Of course I meant it, you idiot.”
“Then yes, you cantankerous curmudgeon. As soon as possible.”
Len leaned in and pushed his mask up again, kissing Jim once more.
“Think they’ve got a honeymoon suite in this joint?” Jim asked.
Len smiled. “It’ll keep, sweetheart. It’ll keep.”
“Can you find out today what we need to do?”
“For sure. You know anyone who knows anyone?”
Jim laughed, and coughed, but he didn’t seem to care at the moment. “Of course I do. Try Steve at the Queen Diner, first of all. In fact,” Jim said, eyes widening, “holy shit, Bones! He did one of those crazy on-line ministry-of-whatever-the-fuck things, when some friends of his-two women-wanted to get married, right after that became legal in Iowa. Maybe he’s still got it. Would that be okay with you, or is that too freaky?”
“Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn, as long as it’s legal. Don’t know if I’ll be able to catch up with him today, though.”
“Doesn’t matter, ‘cause after all, tomorrow’s another day, Bones,” Jim said. “But I don’t feel a whole lot like Scarlett O’Hara, so let’s quit with that theme, all right?”
“Looks like you forgot how shitty you’re feeling, though. Anyhow I’ll ask at the county registrar, too, or whatever the hell we have here in Iowa.”
They sat there, grinning at each other. Len’s smile didn’t show under the mask, but his eyes said it all,
The door swung open, and one of the nurses came in. She looked at the two of them.
“Aren’t you supposed to be sick, and sad?” she asked Jim.
“Would you be sad, if you were marrying him?” Jim asked, pointing to Bones. “Hot damn, Kelly! Me and Bones are getting married!”
“That’s terrific, Jim! Congratulations to both of you.” She handed Jim a tiny plastic cup with some pills in it, and a paper cup of water. “These are the antibiotics and the codeine for the cough. Hopefully you’ll be feeling better soon,” she said, frowning, “though it already looks like you’re doing better.”
“His fault,” Jim said, pointing to Len as he swallowed the pills.
~!~!~!~
Day 14, early afternoon.
“You’re awfully calm,” Pike said, pulling on the collar of his dress uniform,“considering you’re getting married in five minutes.”
“I guess I don’t really have any good reason to get worked up. If I can handle the last two weeks, I can handle saying ‘I do’ and getting a ring stuck on my finger by my absolute favorite person on the entire planet.”
Pike laughed. “All right, you got me there. But seriously, Len. I couldn’t be happier, for both of you. I mean, obviously, I wish this had never happened,” he said, gesturing at the hallway of the unit.
“That makes three of us,” Len said.
“But, it did happen. And he’s doing amazingly well. And he’s a lucky, lucky man, to have you.”
“I’m feeling pretty damned lucky now, myself,” Len said. He checked his reflection in the mirror, and was satisfied.
“All right,” Len said. “Let’s do this thing.”
There was a tap on the door of the unit’s family room.
“Come on in!” Len said.
Dr. Isaacs stuck his head in. “My goodness,” he said.
“Well, you know,” Len said.
“I do indeed,” Isaacs said. “So, are you doing the superstitious not-seeing-each-other-before-the-wedding thing?”
“No-I was just in Jim’s room five minutes ago. Why?”
“Come on back to his room with me for a minute,” Isaacs said. “I’ve got an early wedding present for both of you. I promise-you’ll want to see it right away.”
“Okay …” Len said. “This is mysterious.”
They entered Jim’s room.
“Dr. Isaacs has an early wedding present for us, that can’t wait,” Len said.
“Uh, okay,” Jim said.
Isaacs whipped out a piece of paper. “I’m thrilled to report,” he said, “that all of your cultures are negative. No infection. You’ll be out of here early next week, if things keep going the way they are.”
He handed the paper to Len, who looked it over.
“That’s really good news, Jim,” Len said. “It means whatever has been making you feel sick isn’t an infection in your wounds.”
“And … early next week? Like, I’ll be going home less than a week from now?” Jim said.
“Yep,” Dr. Isaacs said, smiling widely.
“But … but I can’t!” Jim blurted. “I’m not ready! I can’t take a shower! I can’t put my clothes on without help! I’ll … I’ll starve to death, naked and smelly!”
“Jim,” Len said calmly. “You won’t go home by yourself, remember? We’re both staying at the farmhouse with your mother until you’re ready to be on your own while I’m at work. And after that … well, we might even want to consider looking for a place together. Since we’ll be married, and all.”
“Think about how things were a week ago, Jim. This is the end of your second week here. You didn’t take your first steps until eight days ago. Six days ago, you were still barely moving your arms unless you had to. And now we’re constantly telling you to slow down, and you’re gesturing up a storm when you talk. Two days ago, you were sick as a dog, and today, sure, you’ve got the sniffles, but that’s all.”
“And I’m gettin’ married,” Jim added, calming a bit.
“And you’re getting married,” Dr. Isaacs said. “So: I apologize for any upset my news caused, but I wanted you to know, before you got hitched, that it looks like everything is fine.”
“Thanks, Doc,” Jim said. “And sorry about the freak-out.”
“You’re welcome, and don’t worry about it,” Dr. Isaacs said.
“Now that you’re done hyperventilating,” Len said, “how about if we get on with this show? And don’t keep our guests waiting.”
“All four of them,” Jim said. “But like we said-big party later this summer. Huge. Epic.”
“A party to be reckoned with,” Len said solemnly. He kissed Jim once more. “See you at the fake altar.”
“Cool.”
Five minutes later, Jim and Len stood facing each other in the family area, which they were allowed to hijack for the occasion. Chris Pike, Christine Chapel, Sam, and Winona stood in the center of the room, and Steve Runyon from the Queen Diner stood at one wall, facing everyone else.
“Winona, Sam, Christine, and Chris. Leonard and Jim have asked you to be their witnesses today as they join in marriage. Given the current circumstances, they asked me to keep it short and sweet, so I will. With emphasis on ‘sweet.’”
Steve looked at Jim and Leonard, who were facing each other and holding both each other’s hands, and continued.
“James and Leonard found each other by fortuitous accident, when Leonard landed in Iowa just over a year ago. Despite initially finding each other irritating as hell-and I heard this separately from each of them, so I’m not making any gaffes by revealing it-they quickly became fast friends, and eventually, something much more. They both also tell me that they have become better men through knowing the other, and anyone who knows either of them will agree with that.”
Steve turned to Jim. “Jim, you are about to become the husband to a man who is described by his friends and family as caring, kind, conscientious, sometimes cantankerous, highly intelligent, and fragile in his own way. Nurture and care for him as he will you. Allow yourself to be tempered by him, as he will by you. And for heaven’s sake, pay attention to what he says, because this man has one hell of a level head on his shoulders. It may be a challenge to keep up with him, on the nurturing end of things, but I know you’re up to it.”
This time, Steve looked at Len. “Len, you are about to become the husband to a man who is described by his friends and family as unbelievably energetic, passionate, smart-sometimes even a smart-ass-flexible, and fragile in his own way. Nurture and care for him as he will you. Allow yourself to be tempered by him, as he will by you. It may be a challenge to keep up with him, in many different ways, but I know you’re up to it.”
“And now you each have something to say to the other, if I’m not mistaken.”
Len nodded. “Jim, you’re the zest in my life. Your physical and mental energy and bravery astound me every day. You make the world a better place, through all the things you do, and I know you’ll continue with that passion in whatever comes next for you. You’ve let me look at myself in a whole new way, and I’m a better person for being with you. I love you like I’ve never loved before. Will you be my husband, through whatever life brings us?”
Jim beamed at him, his blue eyes shining with a kind of tears Len hadn’t seen recently. “I sure will, Bones.”
“This ring, just like our love for each other, has no end. Soon, it’ll be on your finger, but for now, this’ll have to do,” Len said, as he slipped a chain with Jim’s ring on it over Jim’s head, and let it rest gently on his neck.
Jim cleared his throat. “My turn. Bones, you keep me sane. You know what I need, even when I don’t. You’ve saved so many lives, and you’re gonna keep right on doing that. Mine was one of them-and I don’t just mean because of the last two weeks. I’m a way better man with you than I ever was before. In fact, I think I may be an adult now. I love you like I’ve never loved before. Will you be my husband, through whatever life brings us?”
“I will, Jim.”
“This ring, just like our love for each other, has no end. And you actually get to wear yours, you lucky dog,” Jim said, as he slipped the ring onto Len’s finger. The knuckle gave him some trouble, but it all worked out.
Steve spoke again. “Jim, Len, you are now officially and legally wed. You know what to do.”
Len and Jim had made a point of practicing this moment. Jim called holding Len a ‘range of motion exercise,’ and Len made sure he practiced multiple times a day. Len, in turn, practiced exactly where to put his hands, to hold Jim like he meant it, but without hurting him. The kiss went on just longer than propriety dictated, but nobody batted an eye.
When they finally parted, they didn’t even notice the applause and words from the other people in the room with them. They pressed their foreheads together, and they ignored their tears.
“Darlin’, I love you so much,” Len said.
“Can’t live without you, Bones,” Jim whispered back.
After a few more seconds, they remembered they weren’t alone, and, holding hands, turned to their small audience, none of whom had particularly dry eyes themselves.
“Thanks, everyone, for doing us the honor of being here this afternoon,” Jim said. “And I hate to be a party pooper, but I’m feeling the need to be a patient again pretty soon. But before I go pass out, I have two pieces of good news. First, the blip the other day was just a cold. The cultures all came back negative-so no infection. Second, the doc said today that I can probably go home early next week.”
“So hold on to your hats, people,” Len said.
~!~!~!~
Afternoon and evening visiting hours were a zoo. Gaila, Sulu, Chekov, Scotty, Spock, and Cupcake all descended before their night shift began. The rest of Jim’s family came that evening, as did several people from the Emergency Medicine department, Len’s landlord Mrs. Petty, and various off-duty EMS personnel from the department. The Cozarts came, with baby Jillian, who was just starting to crawl, and was highly irritated that she wasn’t allowed to do so at the hospital.
Len could see Jim was completely exhausted, and kept everyone’s visits short. By eight o’clock, when visiting hours officially ended, Jim was nearly asleep.
“Guess what, darlin’?” Len said, leaning with his head next to Jim’s on the pillow.
“What, Bones?”
“Special treat. They’re bringing in a cot, and I get to stay over tonight. Just this once.”
“Awesome. I’m not gonna be very good company, though.”
“Sure you are. Plus, through whatever life brings us, right?”
Jim smiled. “Yeah.”
Dr. Isaacs came in just after visiting hours were over, to check on Jim, and an orderly rolled the cot in just as Isaacs entered.
“This is so against regulations I don’t even know what to say,” Dr. Isaacs said, “except please, please, don’t sue us. And for the love of god, keep it rated PG. I don’t want to hear about any nurses walking in on anything, all right?”
“PG-13, Doc, and it’s a deal,” Jim said. “B’sides. Uh … shoot. Never mind.”
“What, Jim?” Isaacs asked.
“Okay, uh, wow. You’d think after everything that’s happened, I wouldn’t be embarrassed by anything anymore. But, let’s put it this way. The equipment seems to be out of service, and I’m gettin’ a little worried about that.”
“I think I know what you’re getting at, but could you be a little more specific?” Isaacs said.
“Nothin’s happening. No matter what I think about. And believe me, there’s plenty to think about,” Jim said, waggling his eyebrows at Len, who face-palmed. “No morning wood, either, the whole time I’ve been here. Is that … normal?”
Isaacs nodded. “To be honest, I’d have been very startled to hear otherwise. Your body has other things to deal with now, and it knows it. Give it time.”
“Well, I suck at that,” Jim said. “Anyhow, how much time?”
“I would say a good benchmark would be once you’ve been bandage-free for a week or two. So, another few weeks.”
Jim scowled. “Terrific.”
“It’ll keep, Jim,” Len said.
“Yeah, yeah. Baby steps. Fuck.”
“Please try not to worry, Jim. You’re doing so incredibly well. All your bodily functions should return to normal in time. And on that note, I’m going to head out for the night. Congratulations to you both. And thank you for giving us all something to be very, very happy about today.”
“Likewise, Dr. Isaacs,” Len said fervently. “Likewise.”
~!~!~!~
Late that night, a night-shift nurse came in to check Jim’s vitals and give him another dose of antibiotics. She’d been warned, of course, about the overnight guest, and tried not to wake him as she gently woke Jim up.
“Meds and vitals, Jim,” the nurse said.
“Sure,” Jim said, only half awake.
The nurse took the measurements she needed, and wrote down the information. She watched Jim take his medication.
“Congratulations,” she whispered.
“Thanks,” Jim whispered back.
The nurse left the room. Len opened his eyes, and blinked up at Jim.
“Pretending, Bones?”
“Pretty much.”
Len stood up, and leaned over Jim’s bed. “Some wedding night, huh?” He kissed Jim, who reached up and put a hand on the back of his neck.
“C’mere, Bones,” Jim said, pulling Len towards him. He deepened the kiss, holding Len’s face with both hands.
“Hmm,” Jim said, as Len pulled back to look at him. “Think you’ll fit up here with me?”
Len backed away from Jim and looked down at him, appalled. “No! I’ll hurt you, for sure! Or I’ll fall off, or … or something bad will happen.”
Jim sighed. “Yeah. You’re probably right. Damn it.”
Jim was still holding on to Len’s hand, tightly. He took the hand-the left one-and brought it to his lips, and kissed the shiny new platinum band that adorned its ring finger.
“It was a good day, Bones.”
“Yeah. It sure was. And we’ll have a lot more.”
On to Ch 21c/22
13 14a 14b 15 16a 16b 17a 17b 18a 18b 19 20 21a
WARNING for medical scenes and trauma to a main character
This chapter is posted in three parts. This is part 2/3.
Day 12
Len’s phone jarred him out of deep sleep at four a.m. The caller ID showed the call was from the hospital. His heart pounded, and his hands shook so badly it was difficult to push the button to answer the call.
“Hello? What’s wrong?”
“Leonard, this is Cindy Granger, one of the night nurses on Jim’s unit. He’s not feeling well right now-he’s running a temperature-and he’s asking for you. He’s pretty agitated.”
“I’m on my way,” Len said. An infection could be deadly at this point, and he and Jim both knew it. “Is it an infection?”
“We don’t know. Dr. Isaacs is on his way as well. Jim does have some upper respiratory symptoms, so we’re all hoping it’s just a virus.”
“I’ll be there in ten minutes.”
Leonard made it in eight. He dashed up the stairs, too impatient for the elevator, and was panting by the time he burst through the double doors.
“Whoa, slow down, Leonard,” the nurse said. “Dr. Isaacs is in with him. You can go in, but you’ll need a mask and gown, because he’s taking a look under the dressings.”
“Aw, Jim,” Len muttered. “What happened?” he asked the nurse. “He was doing so well! He was ten times better yesterday!”
“We’re not sure yet. Dr. Isaacs should know soon. Do you want to go in, or do you want to wait outside until they’re done?”
“Of course I want to go in,” Len said. He went to the cabinet that had sterile packages of masks and gowns, and pulled a set out. He scrubbed his hands, and the nurse helped him into the garment, and put gloves on him.
“Thanks.” Without even looking at the nurse who’d assisted him, Leonard flew into Jim’s room. Jim was leaned forward in the position that worked best for dressing changes, teeth clenched and eyes shut tightly. His hands were clenched into fists, knuckles white, and he groaned as Dr. Isaacs peeled the bandages back as gently as possible.
Len knelt down so he was right by Jim’s head.
“Jim, darlin’. I came as fast as I could. You’re feelin’ pretty shitty, huh.”
“Bones,” Jim gasped. “Do the snow-day thing.”
Len launched into the routine he’d started the first day Jim was awake, and had used many times since, when Jim was having his dressings changed, or was feeling more pain than normal for some reason. He talked about playing outside together on a snowy day, and then snuggling up together afterwards. He’d made the imagery more and more detailed each time, and gave it his all on this occasion. He had Jim making snow angels, and building a snowman, and then they lay in the snow together and watched the flakes falling. Jim’s knuckles regained some color, and his breathing slowed and got less ragged as Leonard walked him through their winter wonderland.
Len watched out of the corner of his eye as Dr. Isaacs swabbed a few spots, likely to culture for any bacterial growth, dropping each swab into a labeled tube.
“All right, Jim,” Isaacs said, finally. “I’m all done poking you. Everything still looks really good under there, but I took some swabs to culture, just as a precaution, since you’re We’ll get you bandaged up again, and try to get you feeling a little better, and then we can talk a little more, all right?”
“Yeah,” Jim said, his voice sounding more normal.
Len stayed with Jim as two nurses re-dressed his injuries, which took about an hour. Jim coughed a few times during the procedure, which caused him to tense up and breathe harder again.
“Hurts when you cough, huh?” Len said.
“Yeah. I think I’m sick. Shitty timing.” He coughed again. “Fuck.”
Dr. Isaacs came in again after the bandaging was complete.
“Jim, Len; I honestly think this is a virus. But I’m going to start you on some prophylactic broad-spectrum antibiotics, Jim, just to prevent any secondary infections. I’ll be surprised if there’s any growth in the cultures; usually, if there’s an infection in the wounds, it’s visible before there are any systemic effects. You do have a fever, but it started along with upper respiratory symptoms. But we’ll know in forty-eight hours if the wounds are infected, which, again, I doubt.”
“That sounds reasonable,” Len said. “Can you do something for the cough?”
“Jim?” Dr. Isaacs asked. “Is that cough bothering you a fair amount?”
“Yeah,” Jim said, coughing again. “There’s this reflex, you know, to cover your mouth? But when I do that, it stretches everything out all of a sudden. I know I’m supposed to work on range of motion, but I don’t think sudden jerky movements is what the PTs had in mind. Plus I guess just plain coughing hurts.”
“Is it hurting inside your chest, or on the wounds themselves?”
“Just my back and shoulders,” Jim said. “And I sneezed earlier, and I’d prefer not to repeat that for, oh, another hundred years or so.”
“All right. Your cough is pretty junky-sounding, so I don’t want to suppress it too hard, since your body needs to get the extra secretions out. But I think the best balance will be a small dose of codeine, along with something to loosen up the phlegm. The codeine will suppress the cough, and take the edge off the pain, as well. I know you were glad to get off the opiates, but I really think this is the best option for now. I’ll also have the respiratory therapist come in and see you today; they’ll help you clear out the secretions, and give you some breathing exercises that will help stave off pneumonia.”
“Pneumonia?” Jim said, eyes widening. “Do you think I’m getting pneumonia?”
“Not at all,” Isaacs said. “But shallow breathing, and not coughing, plus an upper respiratory infection, plus the lowered immunity you have now anyhow, make it a possible complication. But the antibiotics and the breathing exercises should take care of that. Okay?”
“Yeah,” Jim said. He coughed again, and closed his eyes. “Yeah, let’s do something about this cough.”
“All right. Codeine and guaifenesin, coming right up.”
Two hours later, at a time of day that was approaching decent, Jim was feeling a little better. His cold symptoms had become full blown, but the cough was better.
“I guess maybe I overdid it yesterday,” Jim admitted, once it was just him and Len in the room for a while.
“Nobody’s saying that, Jim.”
“I am. I started to feel a little, I don’t know, not so great, yesterday afternoon, after Ronnie left. But I just kept pushing through the day, because I was having such a good day. Guess maybe I learned a lesson.” Jim blew his nose, and added the tissue to the pile on his lap.
“I think that’s a dangerous day-the day when you’re first really starting to feel better,” Len said.
Jim snorted. “Ronnie said the same thing. He kept tryin’ to get me to slow down, lie down for a while. Said he did the same thing, the first day he was really feeling better. And that he felt like crap the next day. And hell, he lost an entire body part! I just got burned, is all.”
Len frowned. “You know, he didn’t lose any organs. You lost a third of the largest organ in your body. The one that keeps things in that are supposed to stay in, and keeps things out that are supposed to stay out. I’m not tryin’ to give you an excuse for oneupmanship, but pretty much any physician would say there’s no comparison, in the initial stages. Which I feel compelled to point out you’re still in.”
“Yeah, yeah; all right. Anyhow. Subject change. Sort of. You know what Ronnie’s doing?”
Len shook his head. “No, what?”
“He’s going back to college in the fall! He did a couple years at the U of I before he went to the fire academy, but he’s going back!”
“That’s terrific, Jim. For a while, he sounded like he was kind of at a loss for what to do with himself.”
“Yeah.” Jim sighed. “Speaking of which. I’ve kinda been thinkin’ about some stuff.”
“About what you’re going to do?”
“Uh huh. I’m not gonna try to go back to the job, Bones.”
Len froze. He’d been assuming that Jim would do anything he could possibly do, put himself through any rehab that would help, to be able to do the officers’ training on the next cycle.
“You’re not?” Len said, frowning.
“I’m not. I just …” Jim closed his eyes, which was his new way of looking away, since he couldn’t yet move his neck comfortably.
“Just what, darlin’? It’s your choice; I’ll support you no matter what you choose.” Len caressed Jim’s cheek with his gloved hand.
“I don’t ever want to be near a fire again, Bones. I just don’t. Maybe I could probably find some way to get past that fear, but to be honest, I don’t want to. The idea of gearing up and purposely going towards a fire, into a burning building? I … can’t do that anymore. I’m not that guy anymore.” He opened his eyes again, and took Len’s hand.
“I talked to Sylvia a lot, over the last couple days,” Jim continued. “It was … it was hard to admit I’m not that guy any more. But I’m not. I’m sorry.”
Len smiled, and shook his head. “You don’t have to worry about what I’m gonna think about that, Jim. You know I’ll support you, no matter what. But if you don’t wanna go back to that craziness, well, that’s fine with me. And it sure as hell doesn't make you any less of a man in my book. I didn’t fall in love with you because you’re a kick-ass macho heroic fireman stud who looks hot in turnouts.”
“Smoking hot,” Jim said. “Last time I wore turnout gear, I was literally smoking.”
Len rolled his eyes. “You’re unbelievable, you know that?”
“Yep. But my point is: I honest to goodness thought about whether I wanted to try to go back. And once I got past the … I don’t know, the shame, I guess, of feeling like I was a weakling for saying I didn’t want to even try, I was fine with it.”
“You talk about that with Ronnie at all?” Len asked.
“Yeah. I was really glad he was there yesterday. Because he had the same thing, you know? He could’ve tried to requalify-there are actually a few career firefighters with prostheses of various kinds. But he went through the same thought process as I did. And we both thought about what we’d be putting our families through by trying to go back.”
“Yeah,” Len said, “your mom will be really relieved to hear your decision.”
Jim sighed. “I meant you, Bones.”
“Me?”
“No, the other Bones-see? The lady from that TV show is right behind you. Yes, you, you idiot.”
“Oh,” Len said. “Oh.” He frowned, as he considered what Jim had just said. “But Jim, if you’re not going to be happy doing something else, and you’re not trying to go back to the fire service because you think I-”
“Auuugh! Bones! Were you not listening to anything I just said? I decided not to go back, because it’s the best choice, for about a thousand reasons. And yes, you’re a big part of that. When I was lying there, under that bookcase, starting to cook, I thought, ‘I gotta get outta this. Gotta get back to Bones.’ I wasn’t thinking of my mother, or my brother, or the boys, or my car. It was you, Bones. Just you.”
Len blinked a few times, and then stood up, pushed his mask up, and kissed Jim, as thoroughly as he could given the situation. It was inadvisable, but necessary.
“Are you insane?” Jim said. “I’m sick! Lord only knows what I’ve got.”
“You’ve got me, is what you’ve got,” Len said. “Forever. Whether you like it or not.”
“And now you’ve got my cooties.”
Len gazed intensely at Jim.
“What, Bones?”
“Marry me,” Len said.
Jim blinked once, and again. “When?”
“As soon as we can get the paperwork done. Tomorrow. The next day.”
“Yes.”
“Really?” Len asked.
“Really,” Jim said. “Unless you didn’t mean it. ‘Cause you know, I understand that whole blurting things out phenomenon.”
“Of course I meant it, you idiot.”
“Then yes, you cantankerous curmudgeon. As soon as possible.”
Len leaned in and pushed his mask up again, kissing Jim once more.
“Think they’ve got a honeymoon suite in this joint?” Jim asked.
Len smiled. “It’ll keep, sweetheart. It’ll keep.”
“Can you find out today what we need to do?”
“For sure. You know anyone who knows anyone?”
Jim laughed, and coughed, but he didn’t seem to care at the moment. “Of course I do. Try Steve at the Queen Diner, first of all. In fact,” Jim said, eyes widening, “holy shit, Bones! He did one of those crazy on-line ministry-of-whatever-the-fuck things, when some friends of his-two women-wanted to get married, right after that became legal in Iowa. Maybe he’s still got it. Would that be okay with you, or is that too freaky?”
“Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn, as long as it’s legal. Don’t know if I’ll be able to catch up with him today, though.”
“Doesn’t matter, ‘cause after all, tomorrow’s another day, Bones,” Jim said. “But I don’t feel a whole lot like Scarlett O’Hara, so let’s quit with that theme, all right?”
“Looks like you forgot how shitty you’re feeling, though. Anyhow I’ll ask at the county registrar, too, or whatever the hell we have here in Iowa.”
They sat there, grinning at each other. Len’s smile didn’t show under the mask, but his eyes said it all,
The door swung open, and one of the nurses came in. She looked at the two of them.
“Aren’t you supposed to be sick, and sad?” she asked Jim.
“Would you be sad, if you were marrying him?” Jim asked, pointing to Bones. “Hot damn, Kelly! Me and Bones are getting married!”
“That’s terrific, Jim! Congratulations to both of you.” She handed Jim a tiny plastic cup with some pills in it, and a paper cup of water. “These are the antibiotics and the codeine for the cough. Hopefully you’ll be feeling better soon,” she said, frowning, “though it already looks like you’re doing better.”
“His fault,” Jim said, pointing to Len as he swallowed the pills.
~!~!~!~
Day 14, early afternoon.
“You’re awfully calm,” Pike said, pulling on the collar of his dress uniform,“considering you’re getting married in five minutes.”
“I guess I don’t really have any good reason to get worked up. If I can handle the last two weeks, I can handle saying ‘I do’ and getting a ring stuck on my finger by my absolute favorite person on the entire planet.”
Pike laughed. “All right, you got me there. But seriously, Len. I couldn’t be happier, for both of you. I mean, obviously, I wish this had never happened,” he said, gesturing at the hallway of the unit.
“That makes three of us,” Len said.
“But, it did happen. And he’s doing amazingly well. And he’s a lucky, lucky man, to have you.”
“I’m feeling pretty damned lucky now, myself,” Len said. He checked his reflection in the mirror, and was satisfied.
“All right,” Len said. “Let’s do this thing.”
There was a tap on the door of the unit’s family room.
“Come on in!” Len said.
Dr. Isaacs stuck his head in. “My goodness,” he said.
“Well, you know,” Len said.
“I do indeed,” Isaacs said. “So, are you doing the superstitious not-seeing-each-other-before-the-wedding thing?”
“No-I was just in Jim’s room five minutes ago. Why?”
“Come on back to his room with me for a minute,” Isaacs said. “I’ve got an early wedding present for both of you. I promise-you’ll want to see it right away.”
“Okay …” Len said. “This is mysterious.”
They entered Jim’s room.
“Dr. Isaacs has an early wedding present for us, that can’t wait,” Len said.
“Uh, okay,” Jim said.
Isaacs whipped out a piece of paper. “I’m thrilled to report,” he said, “that all of your cultures are negative. No infection. You’ll be out of here early next week, if things keep going the way they are.”
He handed the paper to Len, who looked it over.
“That’s really good news, Jim,” Len said. “It means whatever has been making you feel sick isn’t an infection in your wounds.”
“And … early next week? Like, I’ll be going home less than a week from now?” Jim said.
“Yep,” Dr. Isaacs said, smiling widely.
“But … but I can’t!” Jim blurted. “I’m not ready! I can’t take a shower! I can’t put my clothes on without help! I’ll … I’ll starve to death, naked and smelly!”
“Jim,” Len said calmly. “You won’t go home by yourself, remember? We’re both staying at the farmhouse with your mother until you’re ready to be on your own while I’m at work. And after that … well, we might even want to consider looking for a place together. Since we’ll be married, and all.”
“Think about how things were a week ago, Jim. This is the end of your second week here. You didn’t take your first steps until eight days ago. Six days ago, you were still barely moving your arms unless you had to. And now we’re constantly telling you to slow down, and you’re gesturing up a storm when you talk. Two days ago, you were sick as a dog, and today, sure, you’ve got the sniffles, but that’s all.”
“And I’m gettin’ married,” Jim added, calming a bit.
“And you’re getting married,” Dr. Isaacs said. “So: I apologize for any upset my news caused, but I wanted you to know, before you got hitched, that it looks like everything is fine.”
“Thanks, Doc,” Jim said. “And sorry about the freak-out.”
“You’re welcome, and don’t worry about it,” Dr. Isaacs said.
“Now that you’re done hyperventilating,” Len said, “how about if we get on with this show? And don’t keep our guests waiting.”
“All four of them,” Jim said. “But like we said-big party later this summer. Huge. Epic.”
“A party to be reckoned with,” Len said solemnly. He kissed Jim once more. “See you at the fake altar.”
“Cool.”
Five minutes later, Jim and Len stood facing each other in the family area, which they were allowed to hijack for the occasion. Chris Pike, Christine Chapel, Sam, and Winona stood in the center of the room, and Steve Runyon from the Queen Diner stood at one wall, facing everyone else.
“Winona, Sam, Christine, and Chris. Leonard and Jim have asked you to be their witnesses today as they join in marriage. Given the current circumstances, they asked me to keep it short and sweet, so I will. With emphasis on ‘sweet.’”
Steve looked at Jim and Leonard, who were facing each other and holding both each other’s hands, and continued.
“James and Leonard found each other by fortuitous accident, when Leonard landed in Iowa just over a year ago. Despite initially finding each other irritating as hell-and I heard this separately from each of them, so I’m not making any gaffes by revealing it-they quickly became fast friends, and eventually, something much more. They both also tell me that they have become better men through knowing the other, and anyone who knows either of them will agree with that.”
Steve turned to Jim. “Jim, you are about to become the husband to a man who is described by his friends and family as caring, kind, conscientious, sometimes cantankerous, highly intelligent, and fragile in his own way. Nurture and care for him as he will you. Allow yourself to be tempered by him, as he will by you. And for heaven’s sake, pay attention to what he says, because this man has one hell of a level head on his shoulders. It may be a challenge to keep up with him, on the nurturing end of things, but I know you’re up to it.”
This time, Steve looked at Len. “Len, you are about to become the husband to a man who is described by his friends and family as unbelievably energetic, passionate, smart-sometimes even a smart-ass-flexible, and fragile in his own way. Nurture and care for him as he will you. Allow yourself to be tempered by him, as he will by you. It may be a challenge to keep up with him, in many different ways, but I know you’re up to it.”
“And now you each have something to say to the other, if I’m not mistaken.”
Len nodded. “Jim, you’re the zest in my life. Your physical and mental energy and bravery astound me every day. You make the world a better place, through all the things you do, and I know you’ll continue with that passion in whatever comes next for you. You’ve let me look at myself in a whole new way, and I’m a better person for being with you. I love you like I’ve never loved before. Will you be my husband, through whatever life brings us?”
Jim beamed at him, his blue eyes shining with a kind of tears Len hadn’t seen recently. “I sure will, Bones.”
“This ring, just like our love for each other, has no end. Soon, it’ll be on your finger, but for now, this’ll have to do,” Len said, as he slipped a chain with Jim’s ring on it over Jim’s head, and let it rest gently on his neck.
Jim cleared his throat. “My turn. Bones, you keep me sane. You know what I need, even when I don’t. You’ve saved so many lives, and you’re gonna keep right on doing that. Mine was one of them-and I don’t just mean because of the last two weeks. I’m a way better man with you than I ever was before. In fact, I think I may be an adult now. I love you like I’ve never loved before. Will you be my husband, through whatever life brings us?”
“I will, Jim.”
“This ring, just like our love for each other, has no end. And you actually get to wear yours, you lucky dog,” Jim said, as he slipped the ring onto Len’s finger. The knuckle gave him some trouble, but it all worked out.
Steve spoke again. “Jim, Len, you are now officially and legally wed. You know what to do.”
Len and Jim had made a point of practicing this moment. Jim called holding Len a ‘range of motion exercise,’ and Len made sure he practiced multiple times a day. Len, in turn, practiced exactly where to put his hands, to hold Jim like he meant it, but without hurting him. The kiss went on just longer than propriety dictated, but nobody batted an eye.
When they finally parted, they didn’t even notice the applause and words from the other people in the room with them. They pressed their foreheads together, and they ignored their tears.
“Darlin’, I love you so much,” Len said.
“Can’t live without you, Bones,” Jim whispered back.
After a few more seconds, they remembered they weren’t alone, and, holding hands, turned to their small audience, none of whom had particularly dry eyes themselves.
“Thanks, everyone, for doing us the honor of being here this afternoon,” Jim said. “And I hate to be a party pooper, but I’m feeling the need to be a patient again pretty soon. But before I go pass out, I have two pieces of good news. First, the blip the other day was just a cold. The cultures all came back negative-so no infection. Second, the doc said today that I can probably go home early next week.”
“So hold on to your hats, people,” Len said.
~!~!~!~
Afternoon and evening visiting hours were a zoo. Gaila, Sulu, Chekov, Scotty, Spock, and Cupcake all descended before their night shift began. The rest of Jim’s family came that evening, as did several people from the Emergency Medicine department, Len’s landlord Mrs. Petty, and various off-duty EMS personnel from the department. The Cozarts came, with baby Jillian, who was just starting to crawl, and was highly irritated that she wasn’t allowed to do so at the hospital.
Len could see Jim was completely exhausted, and kept everyone’s visits short. By eight o’clock, when visiting hours officially ended, Jim was nearly asleep.
“Guess what, darlin’?” Len said, leaning with his head next to Jim’s on the pillow.
“What, Bones?”
“Special treat. They’re bringing in a cot, and I get to stay over tonight. Just this once.”
“Awesome. I’m not gonna be very good company, though.”
“Sure you are. Plus, through whatever life brings us, right?”
Jim smiled. “Yeah.”
Dr. Isaacs came in just after visiting hours were over, to check on Jim, and an orderly rolled the cot in just as Isaacs entered.
“This is so against regulations I don’t even know what to say,” Dr. Isaacs said, “except please, please, don’t sue us. And for the love of god, keep it rated PG. I don’t want to hear about any nurses walking in on anything, all right?”
“PG-13, Doc, and it’s a deal,” Jim said. “B’sides. Uh … shoot. Never mind.”
“What, Jim?” Isaacs asked.
“Okay, uh, wow. You’d think after everything that’s happened, I wouldn’t be embarrassed by anything anymore. But, let’s put it this way. The equipment seems to be out of service, and I’m gettin’ a little worried about that.”
“I think I know what you’re getting at, but could you be a little more specific?” Isaacs said.
“Nothin’s happening. No matter what I think about. And believe me, there’s plenty to think about,” Jim said, waggling his eyebrows at Len, who face-palmed. “No morning wood, either, the whole time I’ve been here. Is that … normal?”
Isaacs nodded. “To be honest, I’d have been very startled to hear otherwise. Your body has other things to deal with now, and it knows it. Give it time.”
“Well, I suck at that,” Jim said. “Anyhow, how much time?”
“I would say a good benchmark would be once you’ve been bandage-free for a week or two. So, another few weeks.”
Jim scowled. “Terrific.”
“It’ll keep, Jim,” Len said.
“Yeah, yeah. Baby steps. Fuck.”
“Please try not to worry, Jim. You’re doing so incredibly well. All your bodily functions should return to normal in time. And on that note, I’m going to head out for the night. Congratulations to you both. And thank you for giving us all something to be very, very happy about today.”
“Likewise, Dr. Isaacs,” Len said fervently. “Likewise.”
~!~!~!~
Late that night, a night-shift nurse came in to check Jim’s vitals and give him another dose of antibiotics. She’d been warned, of course, about the overnight guest, and tried not to wake him as she gently woke Jim up.
“Meds and vitals, Jim,” the nurse said.
“Sure,” Jim said, only half awake.
The nurse took the measurements she needed, and wrote down the information. She watched Jim take his medication.
“Congratulations,” she whispered.
“Thanks,” Jim whispered back.
The nurse left the room. Len opened his eyes, and blinked up at Jim.
“Pretending, Bones?”
“Pretty much.”
Len stood up, and leaned over Jim’s bed. “Some wedding night, huh?” He kissed Jim, who reached up and put a hand on the back of his neck.
“C’mere, Bones,” Jim said, pulling Len towards him. He deepened the kiss, holding Len’s face with both hands.
“Hmm,” Jim said, as Len pulled back to look at him. “Think you’ll fit up here with me?”
Len backed away from Jim and looked down at him, appalled. “No! I’ll hurt you, for sure! Or I’ll fall off, or … or something bad will happen.”
Jim sighed. “Yeah. You’re probably right. Damn it.”
Jim was still holding on to Len’s hand, tightly. He took the hand-the left one-and brought it to his lips, and kissed the shiny new platinum band that adorned its ring finger.
“It was a good day, Bones.”
“Yeah. It sure was. And we’ll have a lot more.”
On to Ch 21c/22