The Arden Round Robin 4.2
Cim: That noise in the background? Oh, it's nothing. Anyway, you were telling me about some Matryoshka measuring cups? That's awesome!
Okay. I gotta sympathise with being exhausted after popping out FOUR BABIES all at once. But uh, maybe bed rest is better than chatting on the phone? Or a bath, or something?
Cim: Hey Lars, sweetie, can you hold *trips* OH MY GOD!
Simone: *tumbles*
Simone: I'm...not on the floor.
Cimorene: Hey! HEY! LOOK HONEY! The baby didn't fall! I have telepathy!
Lars: Telekinesis, dear.
Cimorene: I HAVE TELETHINGY.
Cimorene: Okay. Let's get that diaper changed.
Simone: *THONK*
Cimorene: OH, sorry, still perfecting my technique.
Simone: What if you're not telethingy? What if I can just fly?
Cimorene: FOR SUCH BLASPHEMOUS WORDS I SHALL FEED UPON YOUR ENTRAILS AS THE EAGLE FEEDS UPON PROMETHEUS.
OH THE HUMANITY.
Cimorene: Hey! Heeeey! 8D Where'd my baby go?
Simone: Should be safe up here, HEHEHEHE.
Cimorene: Heeeey, babies on the floor.
Babies: Hey mom.
I hate finger gunners.
Okay, I don't know why I took this picture, but LOOK AT THE GRAIN ON THAT WOOD. It's, like, BEAUTIFUL. O-O
Simone: That stupid Lao Tzu. I hate him.
OH GOOD.
You know, you do HAVE leftovers. And I do HAVE hacks to make you not only put old food away, but RETRIEVE the NEW FOOD. Novel, isn't it. -.-
Well maybe food stock wouldn't be LOW if someone didn't keep leaving their goddamn SALADS out.
Speaking of "leaving your salads out," that definitely sounds like a dirty metaphor.
Lars and Cimorene: WE LOVE DIRTY METAPHORS.
Yeah guys. These pictures basically got me so in the mood that I have to take a cold shower. Wait here.
Muzak: *plays in background*
Person in Audience: Hey, it's a soft jazz version of a popular song that I recognize! *begins to hum along*
Me: Okay, I'm back.
Person: O_O. Oh. Uh, okay.
Me: Were you just humming Poker Face?
Person: NO.
UH - oh...yeah. They can do that, can't they. -.- Why did my brain not warn me that romance sims = woohoo = MOAR BABIES? LOGIC. CAN I HAS IT?
These all basically happened within minutes of each other. Puke, puke, clean toilet, puke, clean toilet. And you're not SURE you're pregnant?!
Then it was toddler time! And I got 375823054 great shots! Or...so I thought! Instead I just got post-makeover shots of everyone:
Siddhartha is kind of too cute for words.
Lao Tzu is my least favourite of the bunch, even though I love his lips.
Simone is a baby knockout.
And Semen Makarovich and I have been keeping in close contact, along with the rest of his extended family. No clue who Otto Harrisburg is, though. Creeper.
Er, I am not sure how this happened, but I have no shot of Themistoclea. You'll just have to trust me that she's adorabobble.
I would like to impress on you how ISBI-style ridiculous this house is getting. Cim and Lars are constantly on the verge of pissing themselves, and then passing out and starving to death. The social worker is, I imagine, actually parked across the street, with some binoculars, just WAITING for her chance.
Anyway, while I would in fact have LOVED to have a nanny so that Cim's coworkers could feed her for a change...I literally had to be sure I had a controllable so the kids wouldn't get taken. O.o
Cimorene: If I'd gone to work, I could have made myself some food.
YOU COULD MAKE YOURSELF SOME FOOD HERE, TOO.
The Kids: WON'T SOMEONE PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN?!
Yep. Nothing else to say. Just...yep.
AND THEN I REMEMBERED THE CURE TO ISBI.
So eat!
At this point I had so gotten into the idea of this being an ISBI that I was shocked to see a promotion. XD
Oh, what NOW.
Cimorene: So...cold...So...hungry...
Cimorene: Rosebud...
Lars: So, I see I've caught you with another MAN, huh?
Yeah, they were totally BONING. HEEHEE GET IT.
Death: OKAY, I WILL GIVE HER BACK TO YOU AS LONG AS YOU PROMISE THAT KATU WON'T MAKE ANY MORE JOKES LIKE THAT.
Lars: OH, PLEASE HAVE MERCY! PLEASE!!
Death: ...I JUST SAID YOU COULD HAVE HER BACK.
Lars: But who will rear my children? Please, think of them, if not of me! Don't take her while she's still young (and hot)!
Death: UM. OKAY.
Lars: And if not of them, think of ME! Do it for ME! We've always been friends, haven't we? You wouldn't do this to an old pal?
Death: DUDE. JUST STAND UP AND PICK A HAND, WILL YOU.
Death: AH, FORGET PICKING. IT'S THIS HAND. JUST TAKE HER. GEEZ.
Lars: Whew, that was a close one!
Lars: IN YO FACE, DEATH! AH BEAT CHOO! HAHAHAH!
Death: ...
Lars: You thought you were getting out of here with my hot live-in girlfriend and YOU WERE WRONG.
Cimorene: Oh hey, I'm hungry again! Neat!
Death: YEAH YEAH.
Cimorene: OMG I ESCAPED THE CLUTCHES OF DEATH! I CONQUERED DEATH!
Death: I HATE THIS JOB.
Cimorene: Thanks for saving me, honey. You're too hot for me to die.
-.- yes. thank you. i know.
Unfortunately, you'd NEVER KNOW I'd hired a butler. He does NOTHING, similar to this pair of goggles I have.
Hey, look, it's Clea! Not...the best shot, I admit. BUT I HAVE A LOT ON MY PLATE AT THE MOMENT, OKAY?!
Butler: What was that about me doing nothing?!
Uh, what? I didn't...I didn't say that. I said you do...uh. Ruffling. Yeah. Ruffling. It's like dusting, but...with petticoats. >.>
I have to say, if this were not a round-robin, I would introduce you to some of the toddler females in this family for future plans. :D
Simone: I am not interested in romance right now! I just want a bath!
Lars: Oh god, this passed out toddler stinks.
Cimorene: *worry worry* 8D
Lars: But the fact that she passed out is HILARIOUS. HEEHEE.
...At this point, I'm just grateful she's eating.
Cimorene: And the Everlasting Apple Tree bore a single fruit, which Albi the no-longer-racist dragon picked, and shared with the deformed Albanian boy from the cave.
Lao Tzu: TELL ME THE TOILET STORY!
Again, I'm just grateful it's almost birthday time. No complaints here. >.>
Just a nugget of trivia: Simone learns to walk. That's it. No one else learns ANYTHING.
DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT DYING. GO EAT SOME ROTTEN SALAD OR SOMETHING.
Good girl. You may note, btw, that some of these pictures are a little brighter than others. Partially this is ingame lighting, but I also was messing with picture-editing actions in PS.
Clea: Please change me!
Butler: Awwww, but my shift just ended! I wanna go home!
Lars occasionally takes turns parenting, as well. Though I admit I'm not sure I want to know what this particular story is about.
Clea: THIS IS LAME. I'M ALL DIRTY. SOMEONE CLEAN ME.
Lars: Okay, Simone, let's get you clean.
Clea: OH this is bull. I'll clean MYSELF then.
Hey look, it kind of looks like a normal legacy, huh?!
God, dude, I have the same fear.
This, though...is a fear I do not share. Sorry, hon.
...In all of my time playing sims. In all three gens of my ISBI, and during that gen of the Dorks when there were like 15 kids, I have NEVER gotten this message. Parents of the year, Cim and Lars. Ferrealz.
Lars: WHY THE HELL IS SHE IN MY WAY?!
Lars: Oh hi, honey! Aren't children wonderful?
Please note that you can see the toilet from here.
Lars: I appreciate your dedication to eating. But you can pee in the toilet instead of right next to the chair.
Cim: I was hoping you wouldn't notice.
Cimorene: Oh well, I can shower later. Now it's pancake time!
Lars: You're not even going to wash your hands, are you.
Oh my God, it's contagious!
It's sad that Lao Tzu finally gets that attention that he wanted...and it's naked mom tickling.
Cimorene: I think you're too big for me to telethingy. But I can toss you!
Butler: If I ignore it hard enough, it will go away.
Wait. What just happened.
Lars: Don't ask.
But I didn't even get a chance card or anything!
Lars: I don't want to talk about it.
OH HELLO BABY.
I think I wept a little with happiness.
Ladies and gents, meet Locke Ouroborous! Yep, not Arden. I never got the two married, so the quads had their names legally changed in SimPE. Locke is named for John Locke, not Locke from Final Fantasy.
Clea: Can you change me?
Cim: Do I LOOK capable to you? I've all ready DIED once because I couldn't feed myself. NO.
Hmmm, proving her point? Or instant karma?
At this point, *I* could use a relaxing bath, too.
Well...1/4 isn't bad?
Lao Tzu, post makeover. I love his lips even more. <3
OMG, SIDDHARTHA. SO CUTE.
Simone has kind of developed this hangdog look on her face, but I still love her! <3
I have to admit, though, Clea is my favourite. <333 She's a great blend of her parents.
And we end this update with Clea and her first autonomous action. So cute!