Collide: Chapter 1 p. 1
so I've decided to try Nanowrimo for the first time. I'm easing myself into it by writing a fanfiction novel rather than original fiction. I really wanted to do original fiction but the piece I want to write isn't quite at a stage where I can sit down and start writing it. I still need a bit more research, so I have fallen back on to another project: Collide.
I hope you enjoy it and comment & criticise so I may write more and improve. Plot ideas and criticisms are of course welcome as are characterisation judgements and all the rest.
without further ado. . .
Title: Collide
Pairing: Remus/Sirius of Harry Potter fandom
Rating: NC-17
Summary: AU (Remus never went to Hogwarts). Everytime Remus gets close to someone, they start to uncover the truth about his strange disappearances and injuries. He can't stand the look on their face when he tells them the truth so instead he erases any trace of their relationship from their mind with a simple obliviate. Tired of getting intimate with someone only to become strangers again, Remus resolves never to get involved with anyone ever again. Of course, resolutions are made to be broken.
Collide
January
At midnight when the ball dropped, couples kissed and most made resolutions to either fall in love, or stay in love. Remus Lupin stared at the night sky and made a resolution never to fall in love ever again.
***
He saw them sometimes, his former lovers. He passed them at the supermarket or in the café they used to frequent, the one with the blue chairs and red tables. He could ask to borrow the paper or to pass the milk and they would look at him and smile without recognition. Of course they didn't recognize him; they never remembered a thing.
He had never planned on obliviating anyone, obviously. No one ever plans to fall in love and then leave their lovers without a trace; at least no one with nothing to hide. Remus though, had something to hide. Something so dangerous that the one time he had been honest with someone she had erupted into hysterics and run out of the house. Remus had to run after her, pull her into an alley, and after only a moments hesitation he obliviated her.
The look of horror on her face, the fear in her eyes, sometimes kept him awake at night. Nowadays he skipped the hysterics and went straight to obliviate. It still kept him awake at night, their vacant expressions and confused questions. It was still hard to hear the confused 'who are you?' from the person you'd spent the better part of the past two months making love to. But it was better than the alternative. It was better than the truth.
He had tried to just break up with them or to disappear but they always demanded explanations and truth be told, Remus wasn't all that good at lying. This way was easier, or at least that's what he told himself. This way was best for all involved. No broken hearts except for his own.
That would change though, he vowed. This year he would stop himself from getting involved with anyone, no matter how attractive or intelligent or funny. He drank his flute of champagne resolutely and wandered back into the party.
His friend Lily was throwing the New Years Eve party with her fiancé James. He knew Lily through St. Mungos where she was a healer. An unusually kind woman, they had struck up a friendship within a few months of her starting his post-transformation care. She didn't know too much about Remus' lovers and he liked to keep it that way. The less everyone knew the better. It was less confusion when they were asked about an ex-boyfriend they didn't recall.
The party was a large one and it was easy to tell both Lily and James were well liked. Remus hadn't been able to talk much to either host since his arrival but despite knowing very few people he didn't feel like an outsider. He was good at making inane conversation that made people trust you and so far he had two numbers in his pocket, not that he intended to call them.
He was just about to wander into the kitchen to grab a glass of wine when he spotted Lily making a beeline towards him, a girl trailing after her.
"Remus have you met Hannah?" Lily asked, stepping aside to show her friend. Ah, Hannah. Gorgeous redhead, wore black lace panties and liked to be tied up during sex.
"No I'm afraid we haven't met," Remus said and extended a hand.
Hannah smiled at him and Remus watched helplessly as Lily wandered off.
"You seem familiar," Hannah said, brow furrowed as she tried to place him.
"I often get that," Remus told her and tried not to think of her pretty red head between his legs. He had a policy of sorts that he never obliviated the same person twice. Once was more than enough for any one persons lifetime and the more he went back to one person, the more attached he would get and the more it would hurt when he told them and they promptly grew afraid of him.
"So what do you do?" Hannah was asking him, her fingers curled around a wineglass. Those fingers that he used to suck and nibble at, those fingers that liked to claw down his back when her hands weren't tied up.
"I'm sorry, excuse me," Remus said and made for the loo. He felt a bit dizzy as he manoeuvred through the crowd and wasn't watching where he was going when he collided with a black clothed body.
"I'm sorry," the stranger said and immediately grabbed his arm as Remus swayed dangerously.
"It's my fault," Remus murmured. "Just feeling a bit dizzy." He glanced down at the hand on his arm before following it up to meet the man who held him. His dark hair was just long enough to fall into his grey eyes, which were staring at Remus in concern. He was handsome in a sort of conventional fairy tale prince sort of way and Remus didn't want to break his resolution quite yet but then the stranger smiled and Remus felt even dizzier.
"Too much to drink?"
"I think so," Remus said with a weak smile.
"Here, let's get you some water," he said as he led Remus to the kitchen, his hand still on Remus' arm.
"Just sit here for a moment," he said as he lowered Remus into a kitchen chair. He didn't rummage around the cupboards but rather seemed to know exactly where everything was.
"Friend of Lily's?" Remus inquired as he watched the man murmur, "Aguamenti" while tapping on the glass tumbler.
"James," he answered, as he crossed the kitchen and handed the full glass to Remus. "Well, both I suppose," he said with a half-smile, "now that they're getting married."
Remus nodded and took a sip. The cold liquid felt good going down his throat and helped clear his head.
"I'm Sirius Black," the stranger introduced himself. Remus glanced up and got a better look at him. He was indeed handsome, and quite fit. He looked good in a plain black sweater and jeans and although he didn't give off an air of arrogance, Remus was sure that he knew it.
"Remus Lupin."
"Pleasure," Sirius said, extending his hand. Remus took it with his free hand and shook it.
"Thank you for this," Remus said, raising the glass of water slightly.
"Nonsense. You looked like you were about to fall over. Made me wonder what Hannah had said to you." His words were innocent and he was smiling but the mischievous glint in his eye made a shiver run down his spine.
"Oh you know Hannah," Remus said offhandedly, forgetting for a moment that he did not in fact know Hannah.
Sirius flashed him a grin. "That I do."
"Are you two dating?" Remus inquired politely. He wasn't prepared for the bark of a laugh that followed his question.
"No, but she tries."
"Oh," Remus said and didn't question further though he wanted to ask why she never succeeded. He hadn't noticed a ring on Sirius' finger when he had passed him the glass of water, but maybe he was taken.
"She's not my type," Sirius said after a moment as way of explanation.
"Ah," Remus said knowingly, taking another sip of his water. He knew that Hannah sometimes came on too strong and sometimes she was a little too aggressive for a lot of men.
"You, on the other hand…"
Remus nearly choked on his water and looked up to see Sirius looking at him appraisingly. His face was growing red, he knew, from the attention. It had been a while since he'd had a man in bed and he really was beginning to wish he hadn't made that resolution.
"I'm sorry," Sirius said, placing a hand on his arm. "I don't mean to make you choke."
"No, I'm fine," Remus croaked. He cleared his throat. "You just took me by surprise."
"Not used to blokes coming on to you?" Sirius said with a rogue grin. He took his hand from Remus' arm and leaned back against the counter.
"No, it's not - well, yes - but -" Remus was sure he had never felt this inarticulate in his life. Sirius' grin had relaxed into an amused smile as he watched Remus sputter. "I can't get involved with anyone," he finally said.
"Family curse is it?" Sirius said and it took Remus a moment to realize he was teasing.
"Something like that."
"Well, I'm not asking to get involved," Sirius said smoothly. He gently took the empty glass from Remus' hand and set it on the counter behind him without taking his eyes off Remus. He ran his fingers lightly down Remus' hand to his wrist. "Lily mentioned you liked blokes on occasion."
"No, I do. I just -" Anything Remus may have been protesting was put out of his mind when Sirius leaned down to kiss him, tilting Remus' head up with his right hand.
"Then what's the problem?" Sirius whispered before pressing his lips to Remus'. As Remus felt Sirius' tongue against his lips, he started wondering the same thing. His resolution had been not to fall in love. A one-night stand surely wouldn't hurt. They would fuck, Sirius would most likely leave before Remus was even awake and they'd never see each other again.
He was just bringing a hand up to Sirius' neck to deepen the kiss when an exclamation made him instantly pull away.
"Sorry, didn't know anyone was in here," Lily said as she quickly put some dirty cups in the sink before leaving again, flashing Remus a quick smile on her way out.
"Let's get out of here," Sirius murmured.
Remus nodded.
"My place isn't far, we can apparate," Sirius said as he pulled Remus to his feet.
Remus nodded again, his throat going dry. He almost gasped when Sirius pulled him close and whispered, "hold on", in a low voice but then they were apparating and his breath was taken away.
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