Fic: Kicking The Line
Fandom: Due South
Pairing: Fraser/RayK
Rating: PG-13 (Language)
Words: 584
Notes: Stand-alone, post-COTW. Belongs to
this story arc but reads on its own.
There was a line between him and Fraser.
Ray was constantly aware of it. Always there; it was there right now, too, in the snow. Right between 'em, and it cut through the fire in front of them and the tent behind them. Had been since before he'd finally given up on Stella, even, which should've been weird but wasn't. All in his head, too, 'cause even though half the time he worked himself into a paranoid ball of hopping crazy thinking Fraser had him figured out, he knew the guy was oblivious. The line was all his, but it was shaped nicely to fit that obliviousness.
It had been a constant companion. Ray Kowalski and his line went everywhere together. They'd gotten to know each other real well. He might as well stick a collar on the damn thing and call home to reassure his turtle that he hadn't been replaced.
But then he got into some weird metaphor about how the damn thing's always underfoot and how lately he's been banging up against it really hard and people who kick the shit out of their pets get in trouble, and suddenly he was picturing his line in a cage in some animal shelter somewhere looking all cute so someone'll adopt it before it gets put down or whatever and Ray gave up, figuring he wasn't cut out for extended comparisons like that.
His brain was one long run-on sentence some days.
Either way, hard as he beat on it, the damn thing seemed there to stay. They locked lips for that breathing thing and things still didn't change between 'em. Every time he thought he might have thrown the big one, some innuendo or infodump or hell, even an outright come-on, it bounced right off that line and slapped Kowalski in the face.
It made him twitchy. Made him want to do something. Ray didn't like being kept back; being restrained turned him into all nervous energy. Like he wanted to punch somebody or dance or get laid or dodge some punk's fist himself. Turnbull got lucky, that time at the Consulate. Ray would've kicked his ass if Fraser hadn't walked in. It was just the kinda changeup he was looking for, locked up in that place.
He didn't know if it was better or worse when whatever was holding him back was invisible and all in his own head.
He didn't get this. Didn't get how Fraser seemed some kinda socially stunted so bad he couldn't see the big neon sign over the hat covering his experimental hair blinking 'HE WANTS YOU, DUMBASS'.
Then again, he had to admit to himself he was the kind of socially stunted that meant he couldn't just say, "I want you, dumbass!"
It was the line, you know? That stupid line.
Fuck. Ray knew he was headed toward hopeless. He was tired of being hopeless with his crap. There wasn't anyone who couldn't smell the desperation on him over Stella, and he was pretty sure people were getting the idea about Fraser before he left, too.
Well. Of course they would. He'd ditched to Canada.
Yeah. More and more these days he was thinking about just stepping right over it. Never did it with Stella. Not successfully, anyway.
What the Hell was the point?
"Hey, Frase?"
"Yes, Ray?"
Screw you, stupid line. "You ever date a guy before?"