Say My Name [1]
Title: Say My Name
Author: k_chan91
Disclaimer: If I owned the boys, I'd share them with the woooorld~ (Maybe)
Pairings: Yunjae // Surprise pairing ♥
Length: 1/3?
Genre: Comedy, romance, smut
Rating: By the end, it shall be NC-17... (Kinda gives away the ending, huh? x'D)
Warnings: Language, smex
Summary: Kim Jaejoong is an average fellow. He's straight, he cooks, loves cats and Febreze and works at a sleazy lingerie store. Perfectly normal. But his last few roommates have been anything but normal. However, when new roommate, Jung Yunho walks through the door of his apartment, he thinks he's finally found the roomie of his dreams. That is, until a dildo avalanche spills out of his luggage.
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1
Knock knock knock.
Jaejoong does his best not to burst.
He's practically skipping on his toes, humming a gay little tune and floating on milkshakes and puppy smiles.
No, he's not high but he's pretty close to it.
He's finally getting another roommate. A normal roommate. He'd had a little talk with the landlord about all his past roommates and he thinks all his problems are finally resolved. Whatever made that guy think any normal person would be perfectly fine living with a sleazy, greasy, womanizing, man-whore who owned enough cologne to open up a boutique--But enough about Yoochun.
Jaejoong drops his duster and Febreze (lavendar scented) bottle and dashes for the door. He stops right in front of it just to smooth any wrinkles in his shirt, fluff up his hair and remove any leftover breakfast from between his teeth. Ready, set and welcome new, amazing life.
"Hi!" Jaejoong hopes he doesn't sound too eager.
The man standing outside his door is tall, built and that confident smile makes him appear even more attractive. So far so good.
Jaejoong swallows a giggle. "You're Jung Yunho, I presume?"
Yunho just nods with a smile and Jaejoong thanks the lord, Buddha, Aunt Yoorae and Coca Cola that this man is clean, nice, pleasant and perfectly, unmistakably, unbelievably normal.
"Oh! Come in, come in and settle down," Jaejoong ushers the other into the apartment and shuts the door behind them. "I'll show you to your room and you can make yourself at home. I'm Kim Jaejoong, by the way."
The other is still smiling that broad, confident smile while he removes his shoes but Jaejoong doesn't mind if he's quiet. Changmin doesn't talk much, either. All the more reason for Jaejoong to babble on and on without guilt.
"I'll take those bags for you."
"Oh, no thank you. I don't have much anyway."
Sure enough, Yunho only had a bookbag thrown over one shoulder and a rolling suitcase behind him. Practical and polite? Check and check. Jaejoong tries to keep the smugness out of his face. This was going to be the best roommate ever.
"So," Jaejoong starts conversationally, "How long have you been in town?"
"I moved recently. Trying out new things."
Jaejoong chuckles cordially. Like a tour guide laughing at his own joke. "Making the most of your youth, I see."
Yunho snorts. "You could say that."
Jaejoong loves him already.
"Have you gotten a job yet?"
"Yeah. I'm a department store clerk."
Jaejoong's smile tightens. "Oh really. So am I. Haha..."
Only Jaejoong is pretty sure Yunho's job isn't selling lacy g-strings and slutty corsets to young, experimental couples and prostitutes in a dirty lingerie store. The job wasn't exactly his first choice. Or even his last. It was an option. His only option. "Damn the economy."
Yunho's eyebrow twitches. "Excuse me?"
Damn. Was Jaejoong thinking out loud again? "Nothing. How about we get you settled in and I'll give you a tour of the apartment?"
Yunho gives him a slow smile. "I'd like nothing more."
Inside, Jaejoong is a ping pong ball, bouncing all over the place and off the walls. He has a powerful urge to do a couple hand springs off the fire escape but no, no, he can't come off as the weird roommate. No. Jaejoong was always the normal one. And he'd finally found a roommate as normal as he was.
Finally, someone pleasant to talk to. Perhaps they'd become friends. Best friends. And they'll fight over who's turn it was to do the dishes and watch TV together and share their feelings. This was going to be so much fun.
Jaejoong sings a little song in his head--something like, Goood riddance, Park Yoooochun~ Ooh ooooh, yeah yeeaah--while he glides past Yunho as happy as can be. Then he trips over Yunho's suitcase, turning it over and spilling all the contents inside, and while he apologizes giddily, he thinks perhaps he should tone it down a little bit.
But naw, being uber happy and a tad bit clumsy are perfectly normal qualities. Jaejoong was normal. And so was Yunho. Jaejoong and Yunho equal normal roomies. Although, he has to admit, there is nothing normal about stepping on a vibrator.
Jaejoong stops in his tracks. Yes. Yes, that thing humming between his toes right now is in fact a pink vibrator. A long, pink vibrator.
In fact, everything that had fallen out of Yunho's suitcase was either a vibrator of many assorted colors, dildo of various shapes and sizes, frilly handcuffs and--good lord, was that a whip?
Jaejoong is speechless.
Okay, too much silence has passed. Get it together, Jaejoong. No matter what, he can't let this get awkward. Having an awkward relationship with his perfectly normal new roommate would only add to the pile of misery that is Jaejoong's past bad roommates, from the drug lord, to a self-proclaimed wizard, to a crazed recycling enthusiast, to a skittish college student who disappeared after three days, to Yoochun the man-whore. This can't become yet another bad experience. There has to be a reason for this.
A dog! Maybe those aren't really dildos and are in fact chew toys for the dog that will be arriving at the apartment aaaany minute now. Maybe he's a CIA agent on the side. And the handcuffs are only frilly and glittery because Yunho is compassionate enough to want the best for his incarcerated criminals. Why can't they be comfortable? Criminals have feelings, too. Perhaps he's got the whip because he's a dominatrix. Wait...what?
Too much silence! He must act fast. Jaejoong says the first, most intelligent thought that comes to mind.
"Good god."
Yunho, who has been watching for Jaejoong's reaction this entire time, breaks into a toothy grin. "Don't worry. They're not for me."
Jaejoong is so overwhelmed with hope, he almost cries. "Really?"
That's when Yunho cocks his head to the side and scans Jaejoong from head to toe like a metal detector. "But if you're interested, I'd be glad to use them on you."
The sudden low, pervy tone in Yunho's voice strikes a chord in Jaejoong's lower spine and reverberates up his back until Jaejoong had gone completely rigid, immobile and blown way out of his mind. "No, no, no, no, no thank you. Hahaha..."
Yunho looms over Jaejoong just a little too close now with a lewd smirk. "You work out, Jaejoong?"
Jaejoong nods mechanically.
He squeals when a hand magically appears on his right hindquarter and squeezes so hard, he worries Yunho might have broken a chunk off.
"I can tell. That ass didn't sculpt itself."
"I have to go pee." Jaejoong squeaks.
He pretends not to hear when Yunho calls after him, "Can I watch?" and once in the bathroom, he runs the sink water on high and hot and curses his luck, Auntie Yoorae and Coca Cola while he splashes scalding hot water on his face, hoping maybe it'll kill him.
Why me? Why oh why oh why must it be me?
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Hi! :D
I found the outline for this fic somewhere in my files all dusty and whatnot and decided to play around with it a bit. No, this is not the next major fic I want to start on after Hookups and Emoticons, for those of you following it (I'm working hard on the last chapter, I swear! D8), but it shall be fun~
I've been craving lots of Yunjae lately. o.o Anyone else guilty? >D
Join meh comm dbkrackweens , yo!
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Author: k_chan91
Disclaimer: If I owned the boys, I'd share them with the woooorld~ (Maybe)
Pairings: Yunjae // Surprise pairing ♥
Length: 1/3?
Genre: Comedy, romance, smut
Rating: By the end, it shall be NC-17... (Kinda gives away the ending, huh? x'D)
Warnings: Language, smex
Summary: Kim Jaejoong is an average fellow. He's straight, he cooks, loves cats and Febreze and works at a sleazy lingerie store. Perfectly normal. But his last few roommates have been anything but normal. However, when new roommate, Jung Yunho walks through the door of his apartment, he thinks he's finally found the roomie of his dreams. That is, until a dildo avalanche spills out of his luggage.
-----------------------------------------------------------
1
Knock knock knock.
Jaejoong does his best not to burst.
He's practically skipping on his toes, humming a gay little tune and floating on milkshakes and puppy smiles.
No, he's not high but he's pretty close to it.
He's finally getting another roommate. A normal roommate. He'd had a little talk with the landlord about all his past roommates and he thinks all his problems are finally resolved. Whatever made that guy think any normal person would be perfectly fine living with a sleazy, greasy, womanizing, man-whore who owned enough cologne to open up a boutique--But enough about Yoochun.
Jaejoong drops his duster and Febreze (lavendar scented) bottle and dashes for the door. He stops right in front of it just to smooth any wrinkles in his shirt, fluff up his hair and remove any leftover breakfast from between his teeth. Ready, set and welcome new, amazing life.
"Hi!" Jaejoong hopes he doesn't sound too eager.
The man standing outside his door is tall, built and that confident smile makes him appear even more attractive. So far so good.
Jaejoong swallows a giggle. "You're Jung Yunho, I presume?"
Yunho just nods with a smile and Jaejoong thanks the lord, Buddha, Aunt Yoorae and Coca Cola that this man is clean, nice, pleasant and perfectly, unmistakably, unbelievably normal.
"Oh! Come in, come in and settle down," Jaejoong ushers the other into the apartment and shuts the door behind them. "I'll show you to your room and you can make yourself at home. I'm Kim Jaejoong, by the way."
The other is still smiling that broad, confident smile while he removes his shoes but Jaejoong doesn't mind if he's quiet. Changmin doesn't talk much, either. All the more reason for Jaejoong to babble on and on without guilt.
"I'll take those bags for you."
"Oh, no thank you. I don't have much anyway."
Sure enough, Yunho only had a bookbag thrown over one shoulder and a rolling suitcase behind him. Practical and polite? Check and check. Jaejoong tries to keep the smugness out of his face. This was going to be the best roommate ever.
"So," Jaejoong starts conversationally, "How long have you been in town?"
"I moved recently. Trying out new things."
Jaejoong chuckles cordially. Like a tour guide laughing at his own joke. "Making the most of your youth, I see."
Yunho snorts. "You could say that."
Jaejoong loves him already.
"Have you gotten a job yet?"
"Yeah. I'm a department store clerk."
Jaejoong's smile tightens. "Oh really. So am I. Haha..."
Only Jaejoong is pretty sure Yunho's job isn't selling lacy g-strings and slutty corsets to young, experimental couples and prostitutes in a dirty lingerie store. The job wasn't exactly his first choice. Or even his last. It was an option. His only option. "Damn the economy."
Yunho's eyebrow twitches. "Excuse me?"
Damn. Was Jaejoong thinking out loud again? "Nothing. How about we get you settled in and I'll give you a tour of the apartment?"
Yunho gives him a slow smile. "I'd like nothing more."
Inside, Jaejoong is a ping pong ball, bouncing all over the place and off the walls. He has a powerful urge to do a couple hand springs off the fire escape but no, no, he can't come off as the weird roommate. No. Jaejoong was always the normal one. And he'd finally found a roommate as normal as he was.
Finally, someone pleasant to talk to. Perhaps they'd become friends. Best friends. And they'll fight over who's turn it was to do the dishes and watch TV together and share their feelings. This was going to be so much fun.
Jaejoong sings a little song in his head--something like, Goood riddance, Park Yoooochun~ Ooh ooooh, yeah yeeaah--while he glides past Yunho as happy as can be. Then he trips over Yunho's suitcase, turning it over and spilling all the contents inside, and while he apologizes giddily, he thinks perhaps he should tone it down a little bit.
But naw, being uber happy and a tad bit clumsy are perfectly normal qualities. Jaejoong was normal. And so was Yunho. Jaejoong and Yunho equal normal roomies. Although, he has to admit, there is nothing normal about stepping on a vibrator.
Jaejoong stops in his tracks. Yes. Yes, that thing humming between his toes right now is in fact a pink vibrator. A long, pink vibrator.
In fact, everything that had fallen out of Yunho's suitcase was either a vibrator of many assorted colors, dildo of various shapes and sizes, frilly handcuffs and--good lord, was that a whip?
Jaejoong is speechless.
Okay, too much silence has passed. Get it together, Jaejoong. No matter what, he can't let this get awkward. Having an awkward relationship with his perfectly normal new roommate would only add to the pile of misery that is Jaejoong's past bad roommates, from the drug lord, to a self-proclaimed wizard, to a crazed recycling enthusiast, to a skittish college student who disappeared after three days, to Yoochun the man-whore. This can't become yet another bad experience. There has to be a reason for this.
A dog! Maybe those aren't really dildos and are in fact chew toys for the dog that will be arriving at the apartment aaaany minute now. Maybe he's a CIA agent on the side. And the handcuffs are only frilly and glittery because Yunho is compassionate enough to want the best for his incarcerated criminals. Why can't they be comfortable? Criminals have feelings, too. Perhaps he's got the whip because he's a dominatrix. Wait...what?
Too much silence! He must act fast. Jaejoong says the first, most intelligent thought that comes to mind.
"Good god."
Yunho, who has been watching for Jaejoong's reaction this entire time, breaks into a toothy grin. "Don't worry. They're not for me."
Jaejoong is so overwhelmed with hope, he almost cries. "Really?"
That's when Yunho cocks his head to the side and scans Jaejoong from head to toe like a metal detector. "But if you're interested, I'd be glad to use them on you."
The sudden low, pervy tone in Yunho's voice strikes a chord in Jaejoong's lower spine and reverberates up his back until Jaejoong had gone completely rigid, immobile and blown way out of his mind. "No, no, no, no, no thank you. Hahaha..."
Yunho looms over Jaejoong just a little too close now with a lewd smirk. "You work out, Jaejoong?"
Jaejoong nods mechanically.
He squeals when a hand magically appears on his right hindquarter and squeezes so hard, he worries Yunho might have broken a chunk off.
"I can tell. That ass didn't sculpt itself."
"I have to go pee." Jaejoong squeaks.
He pretends not to hear when Yunho calls after him, "Can I watch?" and once in the bathroom, he runs the sink water on high and hot and curses his luck, Auntie Yoorae and Coca Cola while he splashes scalding hot water on his face, hoping maybe it'll kill him.
Why me? Why oh why oh why must it be me?
----------------------
Hi! :D
I found the outline for this fic somewhere in my files all dusty and whatnot and decided to play around with it a bit. No, this is not the next major fic I want to start on after Hookups and Emoticons, for those of you following it (I'm working hard on the last chapter, I swear! D8), but it shall be fun~
I've been craving lots of Yunjae lately. o.o Anyone else guilty? >D
Join meh comm dbkrackweens , yo!
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