How To Relate: Chapter 22
Title: How To Relate
Author: justhowthisgoes
Rating: T
Genre: Hurt/Comfort/Family
Pairing: None
Summary: Tony's been getting threatening letters and the team is worried, but Tony isn't taking them seriously. Then come the attempts on his life. Could the new girl at NCIS be involved? And will a secret from Tony's past be revealed in the search?
Warnings: Spoilers up to season 7
Disclaimer: I own nothing, not even Tony. *pouts* I bow to the genius of Donald P. Bellisario.
Chapter 22
Facing Up
"Huh? What were you thinking, Tony?" Gibbs brought a most intimidating glare down to bear on Tony, taking care to keep his voice level all the while.
If Gibbs' intention was to rein in his obvious anger by not granting it volume, he patently failed; despite the almost menacingly soft tones, or perhaps because of them, Tony knew he was in for quite possibly the dressing-down of his life. And, truth be told, he felt that he half deserved it. Nevertheless, whether he was emboldened by the painkillers beginning to drip into his veins, or he was simply trying to make up for three silent days, self-preservation dove headlong out the window as Tony met his boss' gaze, and, in a singularly unwise moment, chose the sarcastic route.
"Could you be more specific? I mean, I know it may not seem like it, but actually I do my fair share of thinking from time to time."
Tony shrank back into the pillows as the ferocity on Gibbs' face suddenly increased tenfold.
"Wow, Boss." Tony blinked slowly and twisted his mouth into a wry grin. "If looks could kill… Guess it's lucky we're in a hospital."
"Don't you give me that smart ass routine!" Gibbs hissed, still exerting a modicum of self-control in that he hadn't yet raised his voice. "I want to know what on earth possessed you to go charging in there without backup and damn well nearly getting yourself killed, and I want to know-now!" He stabbed his finger into the air on the last word to emphasize his point.
All traces of humor gone from his face, Tony looked down, seemingly fascinated by the starched white sheets that he plucked at with his left hand. "Ok, I get it. You're pissed."
"'Pissed'?!" repeated Gibbs, his eyebrows shooting skyward in disbelief. "Pissed does not begin to cover what I am, Tony! Do you know how damn lucky you are to be alive? For that matter, do you know how lucky you are that you're not paralyzed?"
Clearly Tony had not even considered that outcome, judging by his uneasy swallow, even as he tried to sit up a little straighter. "Boss, I-"
Gibbs paid him no mind as he continued his rant. "Of all the reckless, impulsive, irresponsible things you've done, putting your own life at risk, I can't believe you would disobey my direct order!"
Indignant, Tony's eyes flashed as he set his jaw stubbornly. "I didn't."
"Excuse me?!" Gibbs spat out dangerously, his own eyes blazing.
Tony held his ground, hating how weak his voice sounded at the moment. "You ordered me not to come with you, and I most certainly obeyed that."
"You're splitting hairs, DiNozzo," Gibbs growled, pacing over to the window and staring out.
"What was I supposed to do, huh?" Tony demanded. "I didn't have a choice."
"Something wrong with your memory?" Gibbs turned back to face Tony. "You forget rule 15?"
"Oh, yeah. Cuz you're always such a team player," scoffed Tony. "What about Domino? Or Maddie Tyler? As I recall, that one almost got you killed."
Gibbs glowered. "That's different," he replied stiffly.
"Why?" Tony retorted. "What is this, 'do as I say, not as I do'? I didn't know that was one of your rules." He began to fold his arms defiantly across his chest, but quickly withdrew them with a sharp intake of air and a wince.
Ignoring the question, Gibbs noted the pain and fatigue etched on Tony's face with some consternation.
"You should have waited."
Maybe this talk should have waited, he mentally chastised himself.
"I didn't have any idea when you'd be back, and no one was picking up the phone-" Tony gave a frustrated shrug, wincing again as the movement jarred his not-yet-entirely-numb right side. "I'm sorry Gibbs, I couldn't wait anymore."
"Couldn't, or wouldn't?" Gibbs challenged.
"Couldn't," Tony insisted heatedly, the EKG in the background registering his agitation. "I couldn't just sit there and do nothing!"
"Tony-"
"Especially not when it was my fault to begin with. Ali never would have been in danger at all if it hadn't been for me!" He looked down, shaking his head slowly. "And she never will again, not if I can help it."
The last bit was said so quietly Gibbs could hardly make out the words. He wasn't sure whether he was actually meant to hear them.
Tony abruptly sighed and slumped back against the pillows, having worn himself out. Gibbs watched him as he stared down at his hands, looking exhausted and suddenly very young.
"I have rules too, Gibbs," Tony began, "and my number 1 rule is that I don't sit on the sidelines when my people need me."
"Look, Boss, I know it was stupid, ok?" he went on quietly. "But I had to. I couldn't let him hurt her. And you can't deny that you would've done exactly the same thing in my position."
Gibbs' thoughts and emotions were at war. On one hand, he wanted to smack Tony upside the head for being so foolhardy and bench him until he'd learned his lesson. On the other hand, he knew his anger was not completely justified. In actuality, it was concern masquerading as anger, and a part of him wanted nothing more than to take the younger man in his arms and berate him for scaring everyone half to death. And besides that, all-pervasive in the back of his mind was the irritating knowledge that what Tony said was true. He would have done the same thing-no two ways about it-if someone he cared about, someone he felt responsible for, like a family member or one of his team, was in danger.
"Tony," he began again.
His agent-his son, really-looked up at him, every feature pleading for understanding, for absolution, for approval; and Gibbs felt something tug at his heart.
Steely blue eyes softened as they stared straight into stormy green. Gibbs was a man of few words, but for this no words were necessary; at that moment both knew that all was forgiven.
Then the moment passed.
"You will NOT-do anything like this again," Gibbs told him sternly.
"No," Tony promised. "I swear."
A peculiar expression darted across his face that was gone before Gibbs could figure out exactly what it was. Shame? Guilt? Sorrow? A combination of the three?
Tony interrupted his musings. "So, I guess you were worried about me, huh? Abby's right; you really are just a softie underneath." He gave a small tired grin that was no less cheeky for the lack of energy behind it.
Gibbs rolled his eyes. "Don't be ridiculous, DiNozzo." Despite his gruff reply, there was an odd mixture of fond annoyance and gentle teasing apparent in his voice. "You know I just hate training new agents."
After stifling a yawn, Tony laughed quietly. "Right."
"Particularly senior agents. Good ones are hard to come by."
"Hmm," Tony blinked up at him drowsily. "They must have me on some pretty good stuff. I'd swear you just said something that could be construed as a compliment."
"Did I?" Gibbs raised an eyebrow doubtfully.
"Mhm," Tony slurred, struggling to keep his heavy eyelids open as sleep enticed him ever closer. "Sounded like it to me. But don't worry. 'M not gonna tell."
Gibbs smirked. "Better not. Everyone'll want one."
Tony smiled and, giving in to his weariness, closed his eyes and soon drifted off.
Gibbs stood over Tony for several minutes, watching him breathe and puzzling about the look he'd seen in the other man's eyes just before. He didn't know what it meant, but he had a feeling it wasn't good.
"Where's your head, Tony?" he murmured.
...
Chapter 23
A/N: Hey guys! I've never done an author's note here before, but I just thought I'd let you all know that it may be a couple of weeks before I get the next chapter posted. I'm moving next weekend and have all kinds of packing and junk to do this week, so I may not be able to get a chapter done. If I can at least get a short one up, I will do so, but if not, I thought I'd warn you so you won't think I've gone insane and abandoned you all. I would never ever do such a thing. Well, the abandoned part, at least… XD Going insane is more than likely to happen, since this'll be my 7th move in 3 years. Fun, right? Ah, the life of a college student/taking-a-break-from-college-non-student, which is me. :P