hmpf
in
jumping_off
Your relations with the rest of the fandom?
A while ago I asked whether your feelings about 2.08 had affected your ability to enjoy fic.
Well, there's something else I'm wondering about, occasionally: am I the only one whose interactions with the larger fandom have been affected by 2.08?
I know that at least a few of us still love the fandom and have friendships with even some of the most ardent "suicide yay!" people. Myself, I've pretty much withdrawn from most forms of closer interaction with the fandom. I was extremely active at TRA before 2.08 (one of the top ten posters there, by number of posts, and even now I'm apparently still ranked #13, although I haven't posted since May or so.) I also posted quite a bit in lifein1973. I felt really comfortable in the fandom, and fully intended to be involved with it for many years to come. I hadn't made any particularly close personal contacts yet - that's not something I'm very good at, so it tends to happen only very slowly and gradually, even online (although it's a lot easier online than in RL) - but I felt generally accepted and happy.
So I was saddened, and not a little surprised, to find how much 2.08 soured the entire fandom experience for me - and now, nearly nine months later, I'm a little taken aback by how permanent a 'feature' this seems to be. I kind of hoped, back in April, that this feeling would fade with time.
Basically, the fandom now makes me jittery. It's not that I suddenly *dislike* people or anything. I realise everyone's still their same old, friendly and fun selves. There's no *reason* to suddenly feel freaked out by people I enjoyed talking to before. But I do. I see the "happy jumping" icons and I want to post comments in all caps. I don't, because my trollish tendencies don't go *that* far. But the desire is there. Nearly every time I look too closely at a discussion in lifein1973 I find something that makes my skin crawl.
So I keep my distance. I lurk. I've gone from around a hundred posts per month in the fandom (communities and forums combined) to nearly zero, within just a few weeks of the end of the show. I can't imagine ever going to a meet-up, although I love meeting fandom people in RL, and have done so in all my other fandoms with great enthusiasm.
It makes me feel very... immature. But at the same time I know it's better to restrict myself this way than to try to keep up my previous level of engagement with the fandom, because with my emotions still in essentially the same place they were back in April, I'd just be arguing with everybody.
Well, there's something else I'm wondering about, occasionally: am I the only one whose interactions with the larger fandom have been affected by 2.08?
I know that at least a few of us still love the fandom and have friendships with even some of the most ardent "suicide yay!" people. Myself, I've pretty much withdrawn from most forms of closer interaction with the fandom. I was extremely active at TRA before 2.08 (one of the top ten posters there, by number of posts, and even now I'm apparently still ranked #13, although I haven't posted since May or so.) I also posted quite a bit in lifein1973. I felt really comfortable in the fandom, and fully intended to be involved with it for many years to come. I hadn't made any particularly close personal contacts yet - that's not something I'm very good at, so it tends to happen only very slowly and gradually, even online (although it's a lot easier online than in RL) - but I felt generally accepted and happy.
So I was saddened, and not a little surprised, to find how much 2.08 soured the entire fandom experience for me - and now, nearly nine months later, I'm a little taken aback by how permanent a 'feature' this seems to be. I kind of hoped, back in April, that this feeling would fade with time.
Basically, the fandom now makes me jittery. It's not that I suddenly *dislike* people or anything. I realise everyone's still their same old, friendly and fun selves. There's no *reason* to suddenly feel freaked out by people I enjoyed talking to before. But I do. I see the "happy jumping" icons and I want to post comments in all caps. I don't, because my trollish tendencies don't go *that* far. But the desire is there. Nearly every time I look too closely at a discussion in lifein1973 I find something that makes my skin crawl.
So I keep my distance. I lurk. I've gone from around a hundred posts per month in the fandom (communities and forums combined) to nearly zero, within just a few weeks of the end of the show. I can't imagine ever going to a meet-up, although I love meeting fandom people in RL, and have done so in all my other fandoms with great enthusiasm.
It makes me feel very... immature. But at the same time I know it's better to restrict myself this way than to try to keep up my previous level of engagement with the fandom, because with my emotions still in essentially the same place they were back in April, I'd just be arguing with everybody.