Hold On To Love
Title: Hold on To Love
Characters: Jude/Max
Fandom: Across the Universe
Rating: PG-13
Table: 11
Prompt: 17, Content
Author's Note: This is entirely a product of imagination, and I do not own Jude Feeny, Max Carrigan, or any of the other characters depicted in the film Across the Universe.
Jude snuggled under the covers beside Max, yawning as he watched the first rays of dawn begin to stream across the floor of their bedroom. The sun was getting brighter by the second, but he knew that it wouldn't wake his boyfriend.
Max was far too much of a sound sleeper to be woken by the rays of sunlight, unless they were directly in his face. And if he had been tired enough the night before, even that wouldn't wake him. Jude had never seen anyone who was such a heavy sleeper.
He'd seen Max stumble into the shower in the morning before he was fully awake, and he had wondered how his lover could find his way across the living room and into the bathroom when he could barely see. How could anyone navigate with their eyes nearly closed?
But Max seemed to have a facility for doing so, and Jude wasn't going to question it. In fact, he wasn't going to ask questions about anything in his life. He was happier and more content than he'd ever been, and he wanted nothing to disturb this paradise that he was living in.
He knew that the two of them lived in a rapidly changing world; the war was edging closer and closer to their safe little bubble, and that frightened him more than he could put into words. But so far, they were safe -- and he hoped they would stay that way.
What if they didn't? Jude asked himself, unable to hold back a shudder. What if this war intruded into their world, bursting upon them like lava pouring out of a red-hot volcano? It would disrupt everything they'd built, destroy the safety and security he clung to.
The war was coming closer to them with each passing day; Jude could feel in his heart that there was a storm brewing, and that it would affect his life with Max in a way that he couldn't imagine. He was helpless to stop it; he could only wait for that storm to break.
When it did, he knew that his contentment would be shattered; the world would no longer be the safe, happy place that he lived in now. It would become dark and frightening -- and something toldt him that it would also become unbearably lonely.
Would Max be taken away from him? Another shudder ran through his body, making him wrap his arms more tightly around his slumbering lover. The thought of having to leave Max, to go back to Liverpool and maybe never see his boyfriend again, was chilling.
Even more so was the thought that Max could be taken away from him in other ways. People who didn't believe in this war that was being fought thousands of miles away were being drafted every day; Max could so easily be one of those people.
If he lost his boyfriend, either to himself being forced to go back to his home country or to the war, then he would have nothing left to live for. Max was his life; his happiness and contentment resided here, in this man who he loved more than life itself.
What would his life be like without Max? He didn't even want to contemplate such a thought; the idea of not having this unconditional love in his life, of not being with this man every day and night, struck such fear into him that he wanted to crawl into a dark place and hide away.
Without Max, he almost felt as though he would cease to exist. His own identity wasn't wrapped up in his boyfriend to the exclusion of everything else, of course, but Max was such a big part of his life that he didn't feel complete without the love of his life.
He had his art, and that set him apart from Max. He would never submerge himself completely into another person. But Max was a part of him; without the love that he shared with Max as his anchor, Jude was sure that he wouldn't be half the person he was now.
Jude tried to push those thoughts away; he didn't want anything so disturbing to cloud his mind at the moment. Those problems seemed very far away from him; they could happen, but if they did, they were far in the future. They couldn't touch him now.
He was completely content to lie here in bed next to Max, waiting for his boyfriend to wake up and thinking of their future together. A future that he knew would come to them in the fullness of time, a future that he was sure would find them even closer than they were in the present.
Was it possible to be any more content than he was now? Yes, a voice in the back of his mind piped up. If there was no more talk of this war, if that was completely out of his mind and out of existence, then he would be a lot happier without those dark thoughts hanging around.
But he didn't want to let those thoughts touch the contentment he felt at the moment. He was lying here next to the man he loved, the sun was coming up, and it was the start of a brand new day for both of them. There should be nothing to disturb his contentment.
He wasn't going to let those disturbing thoughts get to him, Jude told himself firmly, pushing them back and locking them away. There was no reason to. Max wouldn't be drafted. He was from an illustrious, important family; that kind of thing didn't happen to people like hm.
No, it was the people like Jude who were called into this sort of thing, he reflected, feeling an inexpressible relief that he wasn't someone who could be drafted to fight a war that he had no belief in. At least that was one good thing about being in this country illegally.
If they were lucky, nothing would happen to break into their contentment and rip it to shreds. And if they weren't lucky .... Again, Jude firmly pushed such thoughts to the back of his mind and slammed a door on them. He didn't want them intruding into his mind.
He didn't need to think about what might come in the future. The threat of having his contentment and his happiness ripped away from him seemed very remote; there was no chance of that happening, not while he and Max were together and he could hold on to his love.
It really shouldn't be possible to be this happy, should it? he asked himself smiling as he snuggled closer against Max, breathing in the tangy scent of his boyfriend's smooth skin. He was more content than any human should be; his life had completely fallen into place.
Yes, he was in this country illegally. Yes, there was a chance that he would be found out and sent back to Liverpool. But if that happened, then Max could come with him, or he could get a green card and come back as quickly as possible. They couldn't be separated for long.
He would hold onto this contentment for as long as he could, and he would fight to keep their lives just as happy as they were now, Jude told himself, his own words firm and strong in his mind. He didn't want anything about their lives to change; they were perfect like this.
If anything did change, it wouldn't be in his relationship with Max. The two of them were stronger than they had ever been; Jude felt that in his heart and soul. Nothing would ever separate them in their hearts, even if distance forced them apart.
Nothing was going to take away the contented feeling he had from being with Max. No matter how the world might try to burst into their lives and rend them to pieces, they wouldn't let that happen. They would stand together, side by side, never forsaking each other.
With that thought in his mind, Jude closed his eyes and heaved a sigh, wondering how much longer it would take his lover to wake up. He was certain that when his boyfriend did awaken, they would spend a beautiful day together, and that the day would end as happily as it had started.
Characters: Jude/Max
Fandom: Across the Universe
Rating: PG-13
Table: 11
Prompt: 17, Content
Author's Note: This is entirely a product of imagination, and I do not own Jude Feeny, Max Carrigan, or any of the other characters depicted in the film Across the Universe.
Jude snuggled under the covers beside Max, yawning as he watched the first rays of dawn begin to stream across the floor of their bedroom. The sun was getting brighter by the second, but he knew that it wouldn't wake his boyfriend.
Max was far too much of a sound sleeper to be woken by the rays of sunlight, unless they were directly in his face. And if he had been tired enough the night before, even that wouldn't wake him. Jude had never seen anyone who was such a heavy sleeper.
He'd seen Max stumble into the shower in the morning before he was fully awake, and he had wondered how his lover could find his way across the living room and into the bathroom when he could barely see. How could anyone navigate with their eyes nearly closed?
But Max seemed to have a facility for doing so, and Jude wasn't going to question it. In fact, he wasn't going to ask questions about anything in his life. He was happier and more content than he'd ever been, and he wanted nothing to disturb this paradise that he was living in.
He knew that the two of them lived in a rapidly changing world; the war was edging closer and closer to their safe little bubble, and that frightened him more than he could put into words. But so far, they were safe -- and he hoped they would stay that way.
What if they didn't? Jude asked himself, unable to hold back a shudder. What if this war intruded into their world, bursting upon them like lava pouring out of a red-hot volcano? It would disrupt everything they'd built, destroy the safety and security he clung to.
The war was coming closer to them with each passing day; Jude could feel in his heart that there was a storm brewing, and that it would affect his life with Max in a way that he couldn't imagine. He was helpless to stop it; he could only wait for that storm to break.
When it did, he knew that his contentment would be shattered; the world would no longer be the safe, happy place that he lived in now. It would become dark and frightening -- and something toldt him that it would also become unbearably lonely.
Would Max be taken away from him? Another shudder ran through his body, making him wrap his arms more tightly around his slumbering lover. The thought of having to leave Max, to go back to Liverpool and maybe never see his boyfriend again, was chilling.
Even more so was the thought that Max could be taken away from him in other ways. People who didn't believe in this war that was being fought thousands of miles away were being drafted every day; Max could so easily be one of those people.
If he lost his boyfriend, either to himself being forced to go back to his home country or to the war, then he would have nothing left to live for. Max was his life; his happiness and contentment resided here, in this man who he loved more than life itself.
What would his life be like without Max? He didn't even want to contemplate such a thought; the idea of not having this unconditional love in his life, of not being with this man every day and night, struck such fear into him that he wanted to crawl into a dark place and hide away.
Without Max, he almost felt as though he would cease to exist. His own identity wasn't wrapped up in his boyfriend to the exclusion of everything else, of course, but Max was such a big part of his life that he didn't feel complete without the love of his life.
He had his art, and that set him apart from Max. He would never submerge himself completely into another person. But Max was a part of him; without the love that he shared with Max as his anchor, Jude was sure that he wouldn't be half the person he was now.
Jude tried to push those thoughts away; he didn't want anything so disturbing to cloud his mind at the moment. Those problems seemed very far away from him; they could happen, but if they did, they were far in the future. They couldn't touch him now.
He was completely content to lie here in bed next to Max, waiting for his boyfriend to wake up and thinking of their future together. A future that he knew would come to them in the fullness of time, a future that he was sure would find them even closer than they were in the present.
Was it possible to be any more content than he was now? Yes, a voice in the back of his mind piped up. If there was no more talk of this war, if that was completely out of his mind and out of existence, then he would be a lot happier without those dark thoughts hanging around.
But he didn't want to let those thoughts touch the contentment he felt at the moment. He was lying here next to the man he loved, the sun was coming up, and it was the start of a brand new day for both of them. There should be nothing to disturb his contentment.
He wasn't going to let those disturbing thoughts get to him, Jude told himself firmly, pushing them back and locking them away. There was no reason to. Max wouldn't be drafted. He was from an illustrious, important family; that kind of thing didn't happen to people like hm.
No, it was the people like Jude who were called into this sort of thing, he reflected, feeling an inexpressible relief that he wasn't someone who could be drafted to fight a war that he had no belief in. At least that was one good thing about being in this country illegally.
If they were lucky, nothing would happen to break into their contentment and rip it to shreds. And if they weren't lucky .... Again, Jude firmly pushed such thoughts to the back of his mind and slammed a door on them. He didn't want them intruding into his mind.
He didn't need to think about what might come in the future. The threat of having his contentment and his happiness ripped away from him seemed very remote; there was no chance of that happening, not while he and Max were together and he could hold on to his love.
It really shouldn't be possible to be this happy, should it? he asked himself smiling as he snuggled closer against Max, breathing in the tangy scent of his boyfriend's smooth skin. He was more content than any human should be; his life had completely fallen into place.
Yes, he was in this country illegally. Yes, there was a chance that he would be found out and sent back to Liverpool. But if that happened, then Max could come with him, or he could get a green card and come back as quickly as possible. They couldn't be separated for long.
He would hold onto this contentment for as long as he could, and he would fight to keep their lives just as happy as they were now, Jude told himself, his own words firm and strong in his mind. He didn't want anything about their lives to change; they were perfect like this.
If anything did change, it wouldn't be in his relationship with Max. The two of them were stronger than they had ever been; Jude felt that in his heart and soul. Nothing would ever separate them in their hearts, even if distance forced them apart.
Nothing was going to take away the contented feeling he had from being with Max. No matter how the world might try to burst into their lives and rend them to pieces, they wouldn't let that happen. They would stand together, side by side, never forsaking each other.
With that thought in his mind, Jude closed his eyes and heaved a sigh, wondering how much longer it would take his lover to wake up. He was certain that when his boyfriend did awaken, they would spend a beautiful day together, and that the day would end as happily as it had started.