Original fiction: Creaking Floorboards

[jtsbbsps_dk]

Title: Creaking Floorboards.
Author: jtsbbsps_dk.
Length: 850 words.
Genre: Original Fiction.
Warnings: Mention of suicide.
DisClaimer: MINE! :)
Authors notes: Written for English class in school. Assignment: Write a short story in no more than 1000 words. Your writing style should imitate Hemingway’s. (<- Which is the reason for the many line breaks.) Idea

Comments

Creaking Floorboards

[joan_waterhouse]

You already know that I like it. :) Great job on the dialogues, they feel very natural!
And Go you! for being so brave and really posting it! *thumbs-up*

Re: Creaking Floorboards

[jtsbbsps_dk]

:) Thank you, darling! It really means a lot to me, that you think so! ♥
^_^ Hee, thaaank youu! *hugs close*

I told you I wouldn't get any comments ;D

Re: Creaking Floorboards

[joan_waterhouse]

I told you I wouldn't get any comments ;D
Now, we can't have that! Look at this original_fic and this fictionwriters and maybe this 1teen_writers1.

Re: Creaking Floorboards

[jtsbbsps_dk]

AW! You're so sweet! *flails* You really are so so so so sweet!
♥!

I love you! *goes to check out comms*

[paleshadowgirl]

Very solid. Perhaps a little more poetry needed in your descriptions. A couple of points:

"He sat down on the floor and peaked through the crack"

Should be "peeked".

"He could see her sitting on her shins"

I think you should just have "kneeling" instead. Sitting requires your arse.

[jtsbbsps_dk]

Thank you so much for your comment and the constructive criticism, I really appreciate it!

And thanks for pointing out the spelling mistakes, I'll most certainly never forget those again! I can't really use the fact that English isn't my mother-tongue as an excuse anymore ;D