HAHAHHAA! "The Vamp" - *the* accessory for this summer...

[joyful_molly]

How, I ask you, how have we lived so far without this sparkly piece of (unofficial) Twilight merchandise? Especially on a hot day like this...

THE SPARKLY VAMP DILDO
(Obviously, this link is not safe for work.)

"Yes the The Vamp retains hot and cold temperature. Toss it in the fridge for that authentic experience."

I - yeah. I got nothing. Seriously,

Comments

[joyful_molly]

I'd really rather go with your suggestion of a Norrington-one! :-D The mere thought of a TWILIGHT DILDO is just... *groan* Then again, what great thing to mock! :-D

[veronica_rich]

What would a Will Turner dildo be made of, I wonder? Iron? Steel? Hot poker?

No, wait - burnished metal, with a POMMEL for the handgrip.

/facepalm

[joyful_molly]

What would a Will Turner dildo be made of, I wonder? Iron? Steel? Hot poker?

Sugar and spice and all things nice... polished mahogany, maybe?

No, wait - burnished metal, with a POMMEL for the handgrip.

Now you're scaring me...! *wanders off, laughing*

[kiera_the_thief]

Er... What??
::dies laughing::

:)

[joyful_molly]

Yes, that was my reaction as well. And the promo text on the website is hilarious. If the site wasn't real, I'd say it was a brilliant spoof.

[chloe_amethyst]

"Toss it in the fridge for that authentic experience."

BWAHAHAHAHA!

*dies*

It may be a more environmentally-friendly solution than an air conditioner, however.

*dies some more*

[joyful_molly]

We're having tropical heat here, but not even THAT could convince me to... ewww. As my friend here said yesterday, an iced-lolly would serve the same purpose and cost less.

The Twilight mania has now definitely left the land of the normal and sober and entered TwilightZone territory. AND IT SPARKLES! *cackle*

[viva_lla_gloria]

Good Lord. *cracks up* That is the most hilarious thing I've seen lately - so thanks for the laugh! I'm going to try not to think too much about the whole "cold" experience though... not to mention the sparkles...

[joyful_molly]

It made me laugh like a loon. It's too hilarious, at first I thought it was a spoof! I'd love to know how many pre-orders they had - and how long it will take Meyer's Army to launch the lawsuit to end all lawsuits!

Personally, I prefer a hot lover, anyway... ;-)

[delaese]

I missed this post when it went up!! OMG is that horrid or what? I bet Smeyers is having fits!

[joyful_molly]

I'd love to see her face. And the C & D letter that will be issued to the sellers (I think it's a given this is not an authorised freeze cock!)

Soooooooooooooo... when can we place pre-orders for The Rabbit...? :-D

[delaese]

Oh any time!! All I need is a mould and some water to freeze! >:-D

[joyful_molly]

Ahhh, but that would be too easy to pirate! :-D Miss C. suggested that an iced-lolly would be just as well and cheaper.

Who on earth would want to use a frozen dildo?! WTF, people are sillier than anybody...