Fic: ...What The Hell Just Happened? (complete)
Title: ...What The Hell Just Happened?
Author: josephina_x
Fandom: Smallville
Pairing: Clark, Lex
Rating: PG-13 (because of vague references to possible M/M)
Spoilers: major for 7x10 Persona, goes wildly AU after that
Word count: 3300+
Summary: Clark is driving home after having woken up next to Lex in his bed in the mansion. Lex's bed. Which is apparently now also Clark's. (Clark is still trying to wrap his head around that one.)
Warnings: Un-beta'd. It Gets Worse.
Disclaimer: Not mine, not-for-profit.
Comments: Yes, please! :)
Author's Note: Still blaming nicnac918. Even if she insists that I only have myself to blame :-P
It keeps getting worse.
Also posted to AO3, if you'd rather read there.
Third in the Divergent Persona series: first is "Crying Into Scotch" ( here on LJ, here on AO3), second is "Sweet, Cold Revenge (...sort of)" ( here on LJ, here on AO3).
~*~*~*~*~*~
Clark was halfway to town when he pulled over to the side of the road, stopped the truck, turned off the ignition, dropped his head down onto the steering wheel, and just breathed for awhile, because he had to.
He had no idea what the hell he was doing.
He lifted his head after a moment and reached for the glove compartment. He flipped it open, and pulled out a small metal box and set it down on the passenger's-side seat.
He opened the lid and flinched away out of habit. He wasn't actually hurting -- with the blue meteor rock on him, it had no effect.
He rummaged the small chip of crystalline blue rock out of his jeans pocket and dropped it in, next to the peach-pit-sized green meteor rock, then snapped the lid shut.
He shuddered and took in a deep breath. He usually didn't feel the difference between having and not having his powers on initial exposure or removal of blue Kryptonite, but right now he could feel the difference the sunlight was making. He could almost feel the warmth of it on his skin, soaking in.
The last remnants of his hangover were gone within seconds.
Unfortunately, he didn't feel much more clear-minded now than he had any earlier this morning talking to Lex.
He let his head tip forward, hitting against the steering wheel with a light 'thunk', and groaned.
--Because his first thought had been It had to be the blue-K. Or getting drunk. Or the blue-K and getting drunk, but with him feeling clear-minded and not having had much of a hangover, that kind of blew that one out the window.
He turned his head and stared out the window at the sun. He closed his eyes.
This... didn't make sense.
Of course it doesn't make sense -- it's Lex.
Clark resisted the urge to tear out his hair, get out of the truck and stomp around yelling and waving his arms about, or do anything else that would generally be deemed crazy behavior. For a human.
He turned his head away again, opened his eyes, and stared down at his knees.
He couldn't feel the pressure of the steering wheel against his forehead, anymore.
Somehow, being on blue-K long enough allowed him to physically feel things in a way he couldn't when he was merely 'human'... or otherwise depowered. (He didn't like thinking about what it might mean that his being 'depowered' didn't actually make him human. He kind of didn't want to know how different his body still was from human-standard with no powers. Some things had to be the same -- he'd had X-rays before and no-one had seemed to notice. Bloodwork was something he'd only had done when he'd been under the influence of green meteor rock, not depowered by Jor-El or acted upon by blue-K.)
He figured it had to be 'long enough' beause if he was suddenly open to all physical sensation right away, he ought to have felt that immediately, like an overwhelming onslaught of sensation.
He remembered waking up to the soft, silky pillowcase under his cheek and the bodyheat-warmed linens he'd been laying atop on the bed. The feel of the mattress dipping under him, moving up and down and feeling pressed in and up against, not just hearing the creak of it underneath him.
And Lex.
God, Lex. He felt so...
...Maybe the alcohol had messed with his system somehow. Set, or reset, something in him to let him feel. --Alcohol lowered physical defenses and inhibitions in normal human beings, right?
Clark had felt less, over time, as he'd gotten stronger and less could hurt him. He remembered all the various times he'd been hit by bullets -- bruises and radiating pain, then bruises that healed more quickly and barely an ache, and then nothing at all -- literally shrugging it off. That was pressure, from great force.
He'd felt it when he'd lost half his powers or so, and Lana had gained them, and they'd... caused a few minor earthquakes.
It hadn't felt nearly the same, though. Not like this. Not like Lex.
With Lana, superpowered, it had been more like having enough force to break through his defenses.
With Lex... he'd been gentle. So gentle.
Lana had never--
...Clark knew that was unfair. She'd known that he didn't really react to pressure or touch, even if they'd never really talked about it. Why would she have done something that he couldn't feel?
Then again, she had also wanted... sex... despite the dangers. (And Clark was pretty damn sure that he wouldn't have felt that -- that was half the problem! He could have hurt her and--)
Clark shivered and sat up again as he suddenly remembered sitting next to Lex under the pool table the night before. He'd felt the touch of Lex's warm shoulder against his own, the hard wood of the table leg at his back, the fine-grained texture of the floor under his palms and fingertips...
He'd only been drinking for a couple hours -- and on the blue-K with it -- before he'd gone over to see Lex.
Clark ground the heels of his palms against his eyes and revised the exposure time for blue-K to have that particular effect drastically downwards.
He wasn't sure if he'd been feeling much of anything when he'd gotten into the truck before driving to Lex. He'd been too busy with thinking about Lex at the mansion to pay much attention -- the trip over had nearly been a blur. He wasn't sure if he'd started feeling anything while at the bar, either -- he'd been too busy focusing on the internal sensation of getting drunk.
Physical touch.
...Could it even be possible for me to feel things like that without the blue-K? The thought occurred to him in a flash. He'd never have thought that he could hear or see things better than he had, until he did, right?
But then, my hearing and eyesight have always been better-than-human.
Ok, not important right now. He was getting sidetracked. What was important was that--
Lex asked me to move in with him.
He'd seemed serious about it, too.
Did he even realize what he was asking? Clark wondered, staring at the roof of his truck, then out through it at the lightening sky, Because he didn't really put it that way...
He had offered to share a bed and clothing space. That technically left out other personal belongings -- which Clark wouldn't be able to grab from the farmhouse if he wasn't going home -- and food. And rent money.
Well, ok. Maybe it wasn't living with him living with him. He'd only really offered a place to stay overnight, every night. Clark would have to forage for himself, and... not be in the house any other time dring the day. Right.
...Could he afford food, clothing, and rent on a Daily Planet scut-worker's salary? --And gas money, if he was driving to and from Metropolis every day?
Clark kind of laughed at the image of him asking Lex if he could carpool with him to Metropolis.
He stopped laughing when he thought of what Chloe and Lois would say if he asked them, instead.
They'd want to know why he was coming in to Metropolis every day.
Lois would wonder who was taking care of the farm in his stead.
Chloe, in particular, would want to know why he didn't just run the distance, instead.
Either, or both, of them would talk to Lana, probably sooner than later.
...Aaaaand was he actually really seriously considering this?
Clark thought about going home to Lana.
Then he thought about going to the mansion, where Lex was.
Lex, who had been so gentle with him.
Lex, who had played the role of somebody like one of those sexy film stars, the type you see seducing somebody in a black and white noir film. One of the classy ones.
Clark shivered.
He had never, never felt that way before. It had felt so good, he...
He...
...He didn't really, did he?
It wasn't really that Clark thought... about Lex... that way...
Right?
He'd always been attracted to girls. (Well, Lana mostly. And then Alicia. Jessie had been more about the rush of something dangerous and forbidden -- the Red -- and not the girl herself. ...Chloe, well, sort-of. It really was different when the girl felt the same way.)
Lana... didn't feel the same way. She'd been really, really clear about that.
...Did Lex?
Well, you don't even know what the hell is up with you, you silly alien -- how would you know what was what with him?
Clark wasn't even sure if this might be an alien thing, or just a Lex thing.
...Yeah, it was probably a Lex thing.
Clark sighed and slumped in his seat, closing his eyes.
Lex.
Lex.
Lex. Lex. Lex.
Always Lex.
--Gah! It was so irritating sometimes! What was it with Lex, anyway? He always does this! Everything's fine, I'm minding my own business, doing whatever, and then he ends up right in the middle of my life like a car crash and turns everything upside-down!
Ok. Take a deep breath. Once he'd done that, and felt a little calmer, he thought, Let's try this again.
Do I want to go home and deal with Lana?
...Yeah, no.
Ok.
Do I want to stay with Lex?
--Wait-wait-wait, that was too much too soon.
But where else can I go?
Clark blinked his eyes open and stared out the windshield, not really seeing anything.
Because, seriously -- holy shit.
Where else can I go?
He didn't really have to stay on the farm, did he? Not really. It had just been... convenient.
Farmwork was easy. College had been nearby -- and ok -- until he'd quit. Lana was hard.
...He wasn't running away from Lana because it was hard -- he was avoiding her because she didn't love him.
No, wait, not avoid -- he wasn't avoiding -- he was giving her space. She'd broken up with him. He was just... not kicking her out of the farmhouse while she was finding another place to stay, and trying to help make things less awkward.
And if she ended up calling him on his cellphone in his jacket pocket, he'd just remind her of that -- that she'd been sleeping with another guy for a month and had broken up with him, Clark.
...So, where could he go?
Chloe and Lois are out, he thought grimly. First off, they didn't have the space and, second off, they'd drive him crazy even if they were ok with him crashing on their couch.
And Lana could come over anytime.
And if he was staying in the Talon apartment, he might as well be staying with Lex proper, since he owned both, anyway.
...Staying with his mother in DC was out of the question. He'd already been living at home forever.
Oh god, he had been, hadn't he? He was twenty years old, and still living at home, and... sure, he'd been taking care of the farm, but they'd thought up alternatives before -- talking one of the other farmers in the area into leasing the back forty for planting to help pay for the upkeep of the place -- if and when Clark decided to go back to school -- Clark didn't really need to be farming the land himself. His mom and dad had always kind of assumed that he'd be doing something other than farming when he grew up, once he'd hit high school.
He couldn't really afford a place in town, though, and it would be too easy to run into Lana.
So maybe he could live in Metropolis?
Could he afford that?
...Could he afford living anyplace else? If he really got the job at the Daily Planet.... He mentally calculated the mileage on the car -- about a hundred or so, one way, because it was about an hour-forty to drive to the city from Smallville -- and how much gas that was -- about three gallons on the truck -- and then double that for the round-trip and multiply by how much the cost was per gallon these days... Yeah, taking the subway system would be cheaper and faster, from practically anywhere in the city.
Ok, yeah. If he was working in Metropolis, at the paper, he was going to need to live in the city if he was going to be self-sufficient. --Mainly because he wouldn't just be able to get away with running himself to Metropolis from Smallville; Lex would notice the lack of the truck, even more so if Clark was staying at the mansion with him...
...which was probably now out. He didn't want to impose on Lex more than necessary -- especially since Lex wasn't likely to kick him out anytime soon if ever, if Clark took him up on it, because Lex didn't change his mind easy -- and wherever he moved in, he'd need to be able to zip in and out whenever Chloe needed him...
...and he'd need it to be dog-friendly. Damn. How could I forget about Shelby? Clark berated himself.
It wasn't as though Clark could just relax and be sure that Lana would take care of him -- Shelby was his dog, and Lana never had helped out with Shelby before. Lex hadn't said anything about it, either, and it would be way too much of an imposition to just drag Shelby along.
Clark couldn't leave him on the farm with Lana, though. His parents had always been clear about Shelby being his responsibility, too, so he really doubted that his mom would want him. He was either going to need to find an apartment that was dog-friendly, or find another home for him.
It was actually going to probably have to be the latter, because there was no way Clark would be able to afford a big enough place for Shelby to run around in during the day, and Clark got a little sad at the idea of suddenly restricting his friendly, big dog to four small walls indoors when he'd gotten used to running free on the farm.
...Maybe he could find another farm family in the area for him.
It kind of made Clark sad, but, well, he couldn't do much of anything about it. He wouldn't be able to keep Shelby and take care of him properly, if he really was going to be doing this -- moving off of the farm.
He could ask Ben Hubbard to take care of the farm for him and his mom -- once Lana was gone, it would be kind of awkward, otherwise. He'd expressed interest in the back forty acres before, and Clark doubted he'd have any problem with keeping an eye on the cattle and such. They could always work it out as part of the deal if they needed to. Taking care of Shelby, too, though -- again, a bit much to ask somebody to take care of somebody else's pet, long-term.
Clark absently thought about whether Mr. Hubbard might want Shelby as a pet, as he flipped the glove compartment shut, scooped up the lead box from the seat next to him and shoved it in a jacket pocket, and then started the car back up again and put it into gear.
He thought through a few random things, here and there, like asking Bill if he'd please let Kara know where he was if she ever came around the farm again -- Clark still didn't know where she'd run off to, only that Jor-El hadn't trapped her in the Fortress like he had him -- until he pulled up to the Smallville Savings and Loan. They were just opening for the day.
He walked in and practically cleared out his account, except for the fifteen-dollar minimum balance.
Clark frowned absently at the two-hundred-sixty-three dollars and thirty-two cents he pocketed. The wad of cash was a lot thinner than he'd expected. It didn't exactly escape his notice that this was even less money than he'd spent on his class ring sophomore year, all those years ago in high school.
The money the farm made went into a separate account, for bills, property tax, income tax, and all that. Clark didn't feel comfortable drawing from that, even to help pay for a food budget, if he wasn't going to be living at home.
His college fund was in another account, but it was one that he needed his mom's signature to pull money out of. At the time he'd started college, it hadn't really been an issue, and when he'd dropped out after his dad had died... well, one thng had led to another, and it had never gotten transferred fully into his name.
Not that Clark thought his mom would be ok with using what was supposed to be his college money for living expenses while he did scutwork in Metropolis.
Clark sighed and left the bank. He got in his truck and drove past the farm, tense as hell. He didn't slow down or stop.
Lana's car was still there.
Clark drove until he was at the far edge of the cow pastures, well away from the house, and finally slowed the truck to a stop.
He waited.
And then he smiled as he opened the passenger's side door and Shelby jumped up into the interior and onto the seat.
"Hey, boy," Clark said softly, scratching the scruff of his neck and smiling.
Shelby looked happy to see him, with a wide, tongue-lolling smile, but when Clark reached past him and pulled the door shut, he sat up and his head swiveled back to the door, then up at Clark, in mild confusion.
"I'm thinking of moving off the farm, boy," Clark explained. "I, uh, I may be moving to the city, and if I do I might not be able to keep you, but I'll find a good home for you if I can't, ok?"
Shelby whined at him a little and Clark petted him with a sigh.
"I know, I know, I don't want to give you up, and I'd miss you, too, but I'd want you to be happy," he said quietly, pulling Shelby up into a hug around his neck. "There isn't much room in the city to run, boy. Not for dogs. Heck, not even for me!"
Shelby gave him a quiet 'woof' of agreement as Clark pulled away.
Clark ruffled the top of Shelby's head and said, "But for now, you're still my dog. Definitely. So let's get some breakfast," he grinned.
Shelby let out another 'woof!' of agreement and settled down across the seat.
Clark put the truck into gear and drove off, out of town, and then pulled onto the highway. He took a big loop, headed for Granville. It wasn't that far away, and he could get them both breakfast, himself a few sets of clothing to start, and rewrite and print out his resume at a Kinko's.
After that, the next stop would be Metropolis and the Daily Planet.
And then?
...Well, Clark hadn't known much about normal, or really cheap, apartment rent from his summer in Metropolis, because price hadn't exactly been an option at the time. What he did know, though, was that between the Acrada community group and Oliver's patrols, Suicide Slums was a lot safer than it used to be. Shelby would probably be safe in an apatment there during the day, short-term, and it would be his best bet for finding a place he could afford, in general.
This... this could actually work.
Clark shivered slightly, like he'd shivered under Lex's touch, caught between excitement and fear. The future was stretching out in front of him like a vast, unknowable field, and for the first time in a long time, it felt like he had choices, opportunities, decisions that he could make, rather than being forced into. Like... like he could do anything, anything he wanted. Like not even the sky was a limit.
He felt free.
~*~*~*~*~*~
AN2: Next in the series is here.
Author: josephina_x
Fandom: Smallville
Pairing: Clark, Lex
Rating: PG-13 (because of vague references to possible M/M)
Spoilers: major for 7x10 Persona, goes wildly AU after that
Word count: 3300+
Summary: Clark is driving home after having woken up next to Lex in his bed in the mansion. Lex's bed. Which is apparently now also Clark's. (Clark is still trying to wrap his head around that one.)
Warnings: Un-beta'd. It Gets Worse.
Disclaimer: Not mine, not-for-profit.
Comments: Yes, please! :)
Author's Note: Still blaming nicnac918. Even if she insists that I only have myself to blame :-P
It keeps getting worse.
Also posted to AO3, if you'd rather read there.
Third in the Divergent Persona series: first is "Crying Into Scotch" ( here on LJ, here on AO3), second is "Sweet, Cold Revenge (...sort of)" ( here on LJ, here on AO3).
~*~*~*~*~*~
Clark was halfway to town when he pulled over to the side of the road, stopped the truck, turned off the ignition, dropped his head down onto the steering wheel, and just breathed for awhile, because he had to.
He had no idea what the hell he was doing.
He lifted his head after a moment and reached for the glove compartment. He flipped it open, and pulled out a small metal box and set it down on the passenger's-side seat.
He opened the lid and flinched away out of habit. He wasn't actually hurting -- with the blue meteor rock on him, it had no effect.
He rummaged the small chip of crystalline blue rock out of his jeans pocket and dropped it in, next to the peach-pit-sized green meteor rock, then snapped the lid shut.
He shuddered and took in a deep breath. He usually didn't feel the difference between having and not having his powers on initial exposure or removal of blue Kryptonite, but right now he could feel the difference the sunlight was making. He could almost feel the warmth of it on his skin, soaking in.
The last remnants of his hangover were gone within seconds.
Unfortunately, he didn't feel much more clear-minded now than he had any earlier this morning talking to Lex.
He let his head tip forward, hitting against the steering wheel with a light 'thunk', and groaned.
--Because his first thought had been It had to be the blue-K. Or getting drunk. Or the blue-K and getting drunk, but with him feeling clear-minded and not having had much of a hangover, that kind of blew that one out the window.
He turned his head and stared out the window at the sun. He closed his eyes.
This... didn't make sense.
Of course it doesn't make sense -- it's Lex.
Clark resisted the urge to tear out his hair, get out of the truck and stomp around yelling and waving his arms about, or do anything else that would generally be deemed crazy behavior. For a human.
He turned his head away again, opened his eyes, and stared down at his knees.
He couldn't feel the pressure of the steering wheel against his forehead, anymore.
Somehow, being on blue-K long enough allowed him to physically feel things in a way he couldn't when he was merely 'human'... or otherwise depowered. (He didn't like thinking about what it might mean that his being 'depowered' didn't actually make him human. He kind of didn't want to know how different his body still was from human-standard with no powers. Some things had to be the same -- he'd had X-rays before and no-one had seemed to notice. Bloodwork was something he'd only had done when he'd been under the influence of green meteor rock, not depowered by Jor-El or acted upon by blue-K.)
He figured it had to be 'long enough' beause if he was suddenly open to all physical sensation right away, he ought to have felt that immediately, like an overwhelming onslaught of sensation.
He remembered waking up to the soft, silky pillowcase under his cheek and the bodyheat-warmed linens he'd been laying atop on the bed. The feel of the mattress dipping under him, moving up and down and feeling pressed in and up against, not just hearing the creak of it underneath him.
And Lex.
God, Lex. He felt so...
...Maybe the alcohol had messed with his system somehow. Set, or reset, something in him to let him feel. --Alcohol lowered physical defenses and inhibitions in normal human beings, right?
Clark had felt less, over time, as he'd gotten stronger and less could hurt him. He remembered all the various times he'd been hit by bullets -- bruises and radiating pain, then bruises that healed more quickly and barely an ache, and then nothing at all -- literally shrugging it off. That was pressure, from great force.
He'd felt it when he'd lost half his powers or so, and Lana had gained them, and they'd... caused a few minor earthquakes.
It hadn't felt nearly the same, though. Not like this. Not like Lex.
With Lana, superpowered, it had been more like having enough force to break through his defenses.
With Lex... he'd been gentle. So gentle.
Lana had never--
...Clark knew that was unfair. She'd known that he didn't really react to pressure or touch, even if they'd never really talked about it. Why would she have done something that he couldn't feel?
Then again, she had also wanted... sex... despite the dangers. (And Clark was pretty damn sure that he wouldn't have felt that -- that was half the problem! He could have hurt her and--)
Clark shivered and sat up again as he suddenly remembered sitting next to Lex under the pool table the night before. He'd felt the touch of Lex's warm shoulder against his own, the hard wood of the table leg at his back, the fine-grained texture of the floor under his palms and fingertips...
He'd only been drinking for a couple hours -- and on the blue-K with it -- before he'd gone over to see Lex.
Clark ground the heels of his palms against his eyes and revised the exposure time for blue-K to have that particular effect drastically downwards.
He wasn't sure if he'd been feeling much of anything when he'd gotten into the truck before driving to Lex. He'd been too busy with thinking about Lex at the mansion to pay much attention -- the trip over had nearly been a blur. He wasn't sure if he'd started feeling anything while at the bar, either -- he'd been too busy focusing on the internal sensation of getting drunk.
Physical touch.
...Could it even be possible for me to feel things like that without the blue-K? The thought occurred to him in a flash. He'd never have thought that he could hear or see things better than he had, until he did, right?
But then, my hearing and eyesight have always been better-than-human.
Ok, not important right now. He was getting sidetracked. What was important was that--
Lex asked me to move in with him.
He'd seemed serious about it, too.
Did he even realize what he was asking? Clark wondered, staring at the roof of his truck, then out through it at the lightening sky, Because he didn't really put it that way...
He had offered to share a bed and clothing space. That technically left out other personal belongings -- which Clark wouldn't be able to grab from the farmhouse if he wasn't going home -- and food. And rent money.
Well, ok. Maybe it wasn't living with him living with him. He'd only really offered a place to stay overnight, every night. Clark would have to forage for himself, and... not be in the house any other time dring the day. Right.
...Could he afford food, clothing, and rent on a Daily Planet scut-worker's salary? --And gas money, if he was driving to and from Metropolis every day?
Clark kind of laughed at the image of him asking Lex if he could carpool with him to Metropolis.
He stopped laughing when he thought of what Chloe and Lois would say if he asked them, instead.
They'd want to know why he was coming in to Metropolis every day.
Lois would wonder who was taking care of the farm in his stead.
Chloe, in particular, would want to know why he didn't just run the distance, instead.
Either, or both, of them would talk to Lana, probably sooner than later.
...Aaaaand was he actually really seriously considering this?
Clark thought about going home to Lana.
Then he thought about going to the mansion, where Lex was.
Lex, who had been so gentle with him.
Lex, who had played the role of somebody like one of those sexy film stars, the type you see seducing somebody in a black and white noir film. One of the classy ones.
Clark shivered.
He had never, never felt that way before. It had felt so good, he...
He...
...He didn't really, did he?
It wasn't really that Clark thought... about Lex... that way...
Right?
He'd always been attracted to girls. (Well, Lana mostly. And then Alicia. Jessie had been more about the rush of something dangerous and forbidden -- the Red -- and not the girl herself. ...Chloe, well, sort-of. It really was different when the girl felt the same way.)
Lana... didn't feel the same way. She'd been really, really clear about that.
...Did Lex?
Well, you don't even know what the hell is up with you, you silly alien -- how would you know what was what with him?
Clark wasn't even sure if this might be an alien thing, or just a Lex thing.
...Yeah, it was probably a Lex thing.
Clark sighed and slumped in his seat, closing his eyes.
Lex.
Lex.
Lex. Lex. Lex.
Always Lex.
--Gah! It was so irritating sometimes! What was it with Lex, anyway? He always does this! Everything's fine, I'm minding my own business, doing whatever, and then he ends up right in the middle of my life like a car crash and turns everything upside-down!
Ok. Take a deep breath. Once he'd done that, and felt a little calmer, he thought, Let's try this again.
Do I want to go home and deal with Lana?
...Yeah, no.
Ok.
Do I want to stay with Lex?
--Wait-wait-wait, that was too much too soon.
But where else can I go?
Clark blinked his eyes open and stared out the windshield, not really seeing anything.
Because, seriously -- holy shit.
Where else can I go?
He didn't really have to stay on the farm, did he? Not really. It had just been... convenient.
Farmwork was easy. College had been nearby -- and ok -- until he'd quit. Lana was hard.
...He wasn't running away from Lana because it was hard -- he was avoiding her because she didn't love him.
No, wait, not avoid -- he wasn't avoiding -- he was giving her space. She'd broken up with him. He was just... not kicking her out of the farmhouse while she was finding another place to stay, and trying to help make things less awkward.
And if she ended up calling him on his cellphone in his jacket pocket, he'd just remind her of that -- that she'd been sleeping with another guy for a month and had broken up with him, Clark.
...So, where could he go?
Chloe and Lois are out, he thought grimly. First off, they didn't have the space and, second off, they'd drive him crazy even if they were ok with him crashing on their couch.
And Lana could come over anytime.
And if he was staying in the Talon apartment, he might as well be staying with Lex proper, since he owned both, anyway.
...Staying with his mother in DC was out of the question. He'd already been living at home forever.
Oh god, he had been, hadn't he? He was twenty years old, and still living at home, and... sure, he'd been taking care of the farm, but they'd thought up alternatives before -- talking one of the other farmers in the area into leasing the back forty for planting to help pay for the upkeep of the place -- if and when Clark decided to go back to school -- Clark didn't really need to be farming the land himself. His mom and dad had always kind of assumed that he'd be doing something other than farming when he grew up, once he'd hit high school.
He couldn't really afford a place in town, though, and it would be too easy to run into Lana.
So maybe he could live in Metropolis?
Could he afford that?
...Could he afford living anyplace else? If he really got the job at the Daily Planet.... He mentally calculated the mileage on the car -- about a hundred or so, one way, because it was about an hour-forty to drive to the city from Smallville -- and how much gas that was -- about three gallons on the truck -- and then double that for the round-trip and multiply by how much the cost was per gallon these days... Yeah, taking the subway system would be cheaper and faster, from practically anywhere in the city.
Ok, yeah. If he was working in Metropolis, at the paper, he was going to need to live in the city if he was going to be self-sufficient. --Mainly because he wouldn't just be able to get away with running himself to Metropolis from Smallville; Lex would notice the lack of the truck, even more so if Clark was staying at the mansion with him...
...which was probably now out. He didn't want to impose on Lex more than necessary -- especially since Lex wasn't likely to kick him out anytime soon if ever, if Clark took him up on it, because Lex didn't change his mind easy -- and wherever he moved in, he'd need to be able to zip in and out whenever Chloe needed him...
...and he'd need it to be dog-friendly. Damn. How could I forget about Shelby? Clark berated himself.
It wasn't as though Clark could just relax and be sure that Lana would take care of him -- Shelby was his dog, and Lana never had helped out with Shelby before. Lex hadn't said anything about it, either, and it would be way too much of an imposition to just drag Shelby along.
Clark couldn't leave him on the farm with Lana, though. His parents had always been clear about Shelby being his responsibility, too, so he really doubted that his mom would want him. He was either going to need to find an apartment that was dog-friendly, or find another home for him.
It was actually going to probably have to be the latter, because there was no way Clark would be able to afford a big enough place for Shelby to run around in during the day, and Clark got a little sad at the idea of suddenly restricting his friendly, big dog to four small walls indoors when he'd gotten used to running free on the farm.
...Maybe he could find another farm family in the area for him.
It kind of made Clark sad, but, well, he couldn't do much of anything about it. He wouldn't be able to keep Shelby and take care of him properly, if he really was going to be doing this -- moving off of the farm.
He could ask Ben Hubbard to take care of the farm for him and his mom -- once Lana was gone, it would be kind of awkward, otherwise. He'd expressed interest in the back forty acres before, and Clark doubted he'd have any problem with keeping an eye on the cattle and such. They could always work it out as part of the deal if they needed to. Taking care of Shelby, too, though -- again, a bit much to ask somebody to take care of somebody else's pet, long-term.
Clark absently thought about whether Mr. Hubbard might want Shelby as a pet, as he flipped the glove compartment shut, scooped up the lead box from the seat next to him and shoved it in a jacket pocket, and then started the car back up again and put it into gear.
He thought through a few random things, here and there, like asking Bill if he'd please let Kara know where he was if she ever came around the farm again -- Clark still didn't know where she'd run off to, only that Jor-El hadn't trapped her in the Fortress like he had him -- until he pulled up to the Smallville Savings and Loan. They were just opening for the day.
He walked in and practically cleared out his account, except for the fifteen-dollar minimum balance.
Clark frowned absently at the two-hundred-sixty-three dollars and thirty-two cents he pocketed. The wad of cash was a lot thinner than he'd expected. It didn't exactly escape his notice that this was even less money than he'd spent on his class ring sophomore year, all those years ago in high school.
The money the farm made went into a separate account, for bills, property tax, income tax, and all that. Clark didn't feel comfortable drawing from that, even to help pay for a food budget, if he wasn't going to be living at home.
His college fund was in another account, but it was one that he needed his mom's signature to pull money out of. At the time he'd started college, it hadn't really been an issue, and when he'd dropped out after his dad had died... well, one thng had led to another, and it had never gotten transferred fully into his name.
Not that Clark thought his mom would be ok with using what was supposed to be his college money for living expenses while he did scutwork in Metropolis.
Clark sighed and left the bank. He got in his truck and drove past the farm, tense as hell. He didn't slow down or stop.
Lana's car was still there.
Clark drove until he was at the far edge of the cow pastures, well away from the house, and finally slowed the truck to a stop.
He waited.
And then he smiled as he opened the passenger's side door and Shelby jumped up into the interior and onto the seat.
"Hey, boy," Clark said softly, scratching the scruff of his neck and smiling.
Shelby looked happy to see him, with a wide, tongue-lolling smile, but when Clark reached past him and pulled the door shut, he sat up and his head swiveled back to the door, then up at Clark, in mild confusion.
"I'm thinking of moving off the farm, boy," Clark explained. "I, uh, I may be moving to the city, and if I do I might not be able to keep you, but I'll find a good home for you if I can't, ok?"
Shelby whined at him a little and Clark petted him with a sigh.
"I know, I know, I don't want to give you up, and I'd miss you, too, but I'd want you to be happy," he said quietly, pulling Shelby up into a hug around his neck. "There isn't much room in the city to run, boy. Not for dogs. Heck, not even for me!"
Shelby gave him a quiet 'woof' of agreement as Clark pulled away.
Clark ruffled the top of Shelby's head and said, "But for now, you're still my dog. Definitely. So let's get some breakfast," he grinned.
Shelby let out another 'woof!' of agreement and settled down across the seat.
Clark put the truck into gear and drove off, out of town, and then pulled onto the highway. He took a big loop, headed for Granville. It wasn't that far away, and he could get them both breakfast, himself a few sets of clothing to start, and rewrite and print out his resume at a Kinko's.
After that, the next stop would be Metropolis and the Daily Planet.
And then?
...Well, Clark hadn't known much about normal, or really cheap, apartment rent from his summer in Metropolis, because price hadn't exactly been an option at the time. What he did know, though, was that between the Acrada community group and Oliver's patrols, Suicide Slums was a lot safer than it used to be. Shelby would probably be safe in an apatment there during the day, short-term, and it would be his best bet for finding a place he could afford, in general.
This... this could actually work.
Clark shivered slightly, like he'd shivered under Lex's touch, caught between excitement and fear. The future was stretching out in front of him like a vast, unknowable field, and for the first time in a long time, it felt like he had choices, opportunities, decisions that he could make, rather than being forced into. Like... like he could do anything, anything he wanted. Like not even the sky was a limit.
He felt free.
~*~*~*~*~*~
AN2: Next in the series is here.