Heartfelt prose/Random twaddle

[jeze_belle]

OK, I'm looking for help here.

The bare bones of this story has been floating around in my head, so here's the begining. It's fuelled by three glasses of wine and is a first draft, so pre-emptive apologies, but I'd really like some feedback.
Are you interested in this character? Do you give a shit what happens to her? Do you get any ideas about what

Comments

[lily_st_regis]

Is this the one that's been in your head - a really like it, i love the uncle ferrit comment. I do care about the characters - mostly the ones not in a strunken drooper (that better not be me girl!)

Write this one - and please finish it!

Mmmwah!

[jeze_belle]

No, it's not you, but they are walking up the front of Western Hill in my head.

[lily_st_regis]

I didn't actually think it was me - twas a joke - i kinda saw the top of north road.

[summersdream]

zomg. I fangirl and demand that you TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED. NOW. *evilfangirlglareofd00m*

I love it. And I wanna know what happpened. *whine*

Your humor kills me. The uncle and the drunk demented harpy American Pie girl. Love. Disappointment at what's under the helment? Double love.

Poor girl. Finding sinister Southern bank managers on motorcycles. She's right. He should have at least been hot. Damn. ;D

[jeze_belle]

Oh, you made me blush.

Cool beans man, it's nice to know I'm not barking up entirely the wrong tree here. I'll try and write some more sharpish, and we'll see where it goes.

(Thanks)