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secoh January 21 2010, 05:57:22 UTC
You saved the best til last. Excellent ending :)

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mehhayperson January 21 2010, 10:01:43 UTC
AWWWWW! A happy ending, of sorts. At least if you ignore any repurcussions from the hearing thing. I liked very much how you wove that into the main story, by the way. I thought it worked very well.

This sentence in the beginning looked weird - I think you forgot a word: "There was another car waiting to her back to her home in the Northeast Sector"

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jeriendhal January 21 2010, 10:30:34 UTC
I'll have to fix that.

And there won't be any repercussions. It's set up like the Truth and Reconciliation hearings that South Africa held after apartied was abolished, so people would just be willing to speak. Given how ordinary people did awful things under the Dominion's rule just to survive, the idea is to just to let people admit to what they've done so they can get it all off their chests.

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mjkj January 23 2010, 11:03:55 UTC
Awwww, nice...

And I can really understand that she felt guilty and therefor did not want her kids to know...

...and it is nice how you integrated it into the other stories: I think (if I am not mistaken) this is the same site where that other fic is playing (where the countess is having the speech for the memorial) and also where alt.Rufus' Hazel is from, is it?

mjkj

Some typos I have found:

- [quote]Whitepelt looked at * in suspicion, hoping it wasn’t some idiot reporter wanting to talk to her, then starting wishing it was a reporter when her son Artineth climbed out of the skimmer.[/quote] * there is an "it" missing, I think

- [quote]They supeonaed me after all.”[/quote] that should read "subpoenaed"

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jeriendhal January 23 2010, 14:44:40 UTC
You're half right. Her home is in the smae neighborhood that Hazel will eventually grow up in, but it's not the same location that Lilfluf's story is set in.

I'll look at the typos later.

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mjkj January 28 2010, 20:07:29 UTC
Oh ... my bad...

Sorry, I had them both mixed up... ^^'

mjkj

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