Busy weekend is busy

[jelazakazone]

Today was taken up taking a child to a playdate and getting sucked in talking to the mom for at least half an hour.  Then I had to take DD2 shopping for sneakers as I realized she doesn't have a decent pair and needs them for PE.  Came home from that, cleaned up in the kitchen and packed up stuff for the afternoon/evening and we dashed out the door

Comments

[lillibet]

Isn't that something we've worked on in bragging-practice? Bragging about things that we denigrate because we don't think they're a big deal or done as well as we might or just because they are easy for us?

I do it, too, but I recognize that other people see me very differently than I see myself and try to balance those viewpoints as best I can.

[jelazakazone]

Yes. You would think that bragging would help with this sort of thing, and maybe it has. Maybe I need to start bragging about the stuff I feel like I'm completely incompetent about.

But what I'm really wondering about is how to have a less skewed perception of myself.

[lillibet]

Maybe start with the old adage: if a friend said to you the things you say to yourself, would she still be your friend? That kind of thinking really helped me to chill on the self-denigration.

[jelazakazone]

Oh gawd. I'm definitely my own worst enemy. Interesting point. I will attempt to take it to heart.

[jelazakazone]

How have you cultivated that awareness?

The wedding was lovely. We did fine with the blessing, although there was a woman who was cracking up at something her sister had said and I thought she was laughing at something DD2 was doing and I almost lost it a couple times, but I managed to hang in there (dh and I sang a song as part of our blessing).

[jelazakazone]

I think I have to catch myself doing it first and then ask that old question:D

We used to sing a lot more. DH wants to get back to it. I don't have a good excuse any more for why we don't sing. It was part of the bedtime routine, but then the bedtime routine changed.

[jelazakazone]

I think that you are to something here with the idea of peer groups reflecting something to us about ourselves. I was always grouped with people smarter/better than me and I still have this idea that everyone around me is smarter/better than me at whatever it is I happen to be doing.

As someone else said above, I also need to think about whether or not I would be friends with someone if she said what I say to myself (and would I really believe those things were true if I put it on another person? Probably not.)

[jelazakazone]

I think the problem for me is that I have almost no outside input. It all comes from inside my head. Isolation is dangerous. And I've been fairly isolated for 10 years now. Time to get out in the world (more).

I don't think everyone feels/thinks that way. I have ridiculously high standards for myself and yet I don't expect other people to live up to my standards. I know plenty of people do that.

Sorry if I'm not making any sense. I'm falling asleep even though it's not even 7pm. We went to a wedding reception at a pizza place and I ate waaaay too much food. We didn't eat dinner (finished eating at 4ish) and I am still feeling kind of full.

[archaeologist_d]

I used to worry about my inadequacies all the time but as I got older, it didn't matter much any more. As long as I feel I'm doing the best I can and it (whatever it is) works well enough, that's good enough for me.

[jelazakazone]

I think I've also realized that I'm not actually interested in/excited by most of what I do and so when no one else seems to value it either, it makes me feel pretty worthless.

Good thing I'm about to embark on an adventure of fun and excitement:D I plan to write and quilt intensively this year.