Gift fic for viivu
To: viivu
From: cynicalism
SEASON'S GREETINGS!
Title: Boys Will be Boys
Pairing/Group: Massu/Tegoshi (NewS)
Rating: PG
Notes: Merry Christmas viivu! I hope I do not disappoint! Also, much love to my beta, who is made of shiny awesomeness.
Summary: Boys will be boys.
When Tegoshi finally realizes that he maybe likes his best friend in more than just a platonic way, he does what any other shiny pop idol in his circumstance would do. He freaks the hell out--and still looks amazing as he does it, of course. But that's besides the point. Tegoshi is a boy. And boys like girls. Boys should like girls. And it doesn't matter how pretty Massu might look with his hair kind of disheveled and his eyes all squinty and his mouth--girls.
Tegoshi shakes his head and rationalizes, because he's not just a shiny pop idol--he's also a psychology major, and it's kind of what they do. So Tegoshi thinks that he's clearly just overworked and overstressed and has been spending maybe a little too much time with Massu lately, which would totally lead to strange thoughts about one's best friend. Sure. Tegoshi then decides to right this matter in the only way he knows how. He rummages around his room until he finds an old issue of Myojo, and flips through the pages for the first cute girl he can find. He lands on a page with Aragaki Yui, who is a cute girl. He thought so when they had been co-stars in My Boss My Hero, too, so clearly, Tegoshi is a normal boy who likes cute girls. Yes. And didn't Yui star in that one drama with Toda Erika, another cute girl? And hadn't she been in the same drama as Nishihara Aki, who had also starred in the same drama as Massu and--damnit.
Tegoshi kicks the magazine away in a huff and closes his eyes, tries hard not to think about Massu and that weird, fluttery feeling he had had in his chest last night on the train when they were going home and the light had hit Massu's face just so it looked like his eyes were dancing, and then Massu had grinned and leaned over, touching their shoulders together lightly and laughing and--Tegoshi fails. Spectacularly. Feels his cheeks redden and his face grow warm at the thought. He claws at his hair in frustration before falling back onto the floor in a miserable, attractive heap. What's he supposed to do now? It's not like Massu is--he wouldn't possibly, maybe--
Tegoshi pouts, glances over and catches sight of something else in the magazine. It's the July issue, and a two page spread of himself and Massu stares almost mockingly back at him. Tegoshi frowns--or tries to, anyway, he's a little distracted by Massu in plaid--when something interesting catches his eye.
"Confession," Tegoshi reads blankly, staring at the tiny image of himself handing Massu a love letter--the irony of it all stabbing him repeatedly in the skull. It's then that Tegoshi finally decides to do what any other shiny and rational pop-idol-slash-psychology-major in his circumstance would do.
He decides to ask Shige for advice.
-
"Shige, I think I like Massu," Tegoshi says cautiously, when the two are having lunch the next day. Shige looks up from his burger and blinks, swallows.
"Okay." He takes a sip of his coke. Tegoshi blinks, lips quivering.
"N-no wait! I don't think you heard me correctly! I said I like Massu. As in, like like."
Shige blinks, nods a little, "Okay."
"Shige!" Tegoshi whines, "I'm being serious here!"
"...Okay."
"Shouldn't you have more of a reaction than that?!"
"Uhm, why?"
"Because we're both boys!" Tegoshi wails, slamming his hands onto the table, and pointedly ignoring the looks he's garnering from the other patrons in the restaurant. Shige stares for a good moment, before his eyes widen and his lips part and he points at Tegoshi with his index finger.
"You're a boy?!"
A minute later finds Shige clutching at his shin, hissing in pain as Tegoshi camly takes a sip of his iced tea.
"Ten years of soccer, three months of soccer," Tegoshi clucks. Shige glares.
"What's the problem, anyway? So you like like Massu. It's not like that's news to anyone," Shige huffs, still smarting from the blow.
"W-what? Really!?" It had been news to him! Tegoshi bites his lip, worried, "Then, do you think Massu already knows?"
"...It's Massu," Shige replies, amused. "He probably wouldn't get it unless you told him straight out." At Tegoshi's silence, Shige pauses, "Were you--not going to say anything?"
Tegoshi picks at his fries, frowning as he smears ketchup all over his plate, "Massu likes girls."
Shige opens his mouth to retort, before closing it, wisely deciding to sidestep the obvious comment. He clears his throat and says instead, "But you l--ike Massu." Tegoshi doesn't say anything at that, and Shige sighs and scratches his head.
"But how would you tell your best friend of so many years that you suddenly like him as maybe more than a friend?" Tegoshi asks is a small voice.
Shige purses his lips, leans his chin on top of laced fingers, and ponders this fact as Tegoshi continues to stare dejectedly at the ketchup smear on his plate that is looking increasingly like a heart by the second. Tegoshi wrinkles his nose and piles the rest of his fries on top of it.
"Maybe you can write him a song," Shige finally suggests, after Tegoshi has succeeded in covering every bit of ketchup on his plate. Tegoshi pauses, stares at him for a good moment, before his eyes widen and his lips part and he almost sends china and silverware crashing to the floor in his haste to tackle the other boy into a hug.
"Shige is a genius!"
-
Tegoshi spends the greater part of the night writing his song, carefully and meticulously choosing each and every word. He finally finishes and hops into bed at four in the morning, and even though he only catches two hours of sleep before he has to go to work, Tegoshi finds that he's more awake than ever. And when Massu finally walks into the dressing room, five minutes late, but ten minutes earlier than he usually is, Tegoshi immediately bounds up to him, composition notebook in hand.
"Ne, Massu! I wrote some lyrics down, yesterday. Wanna take a look?" Tegoshi asks, trying not to sound as if he had spent the greater part of an hour thinking up that line. Massu grins.
"Sure!"
"It's about two people who've been friends for a really long time, and don't realize until the very end that they really, really like each other," Tegoshi says slowly, gauging Massu's expression as the older boy reads through the lyrics. When Massu finishes, he looks up and smiles like he in that way that makes Tegoshi's chest flutter-flutter all over again.
"Aha, Tegoshi really likes these kinds of mushy words, ne?" Massu laughs cheerfully, handing Tegoshi the notebook. "It's good though. Maybe Shige can make up the melody for it and you guys can have another duet at our next concert."
Tegoshi blinks, still wondering if this is just some kind of joke, as Massu neatly sets up his things in his corner of the counter, humming to himself.
When Shige asks him how things went later, Tegoshi glares and chucks a balled up piece of paper at his head, "Shige is an idiot."
-
But Tegoshi finds that he isn't actually all that deterred by his first failed attempt at a confession, or the fact that Massu had suggested for Tegoshi to have a duet with someone else. Not really, no. He clearly hadn't been thinking straight when he had asked Shige of all people for advice. The boy might be smart in academics, but he's not so bright on the emotional side of life. That's when Tegoshi decides that person he should've turned to from the beginning is NewS's resident Member-Ai expert himself--Koyama. So after they're done for the day, Tegoshi quickly latches onto Koyama's arm and grins.
"Say Koyama, I haven't been able to eat your mom's ramen for a really long time."
Koyama laughs and pats him on the head, tells him, "Sure! Let's go!"
They're about halfway through the meal when Tegoshi finds he can't be patient anymore and he drops his chopsticks into his bowl and blurts out, "KoyamaIreallyneedyourhelpIthinkImightpossiblylikeMassuandIdon'tknowwhattodoaboutit." He says it so rapidly, in just a single breath, that Koyama has to take a moment to bask in pride, before digesting Tegoshi's actual words.
"Oh! Well, have you tried confessing already?" Koyama asks conversationally, like Tegoshi hadn't just revealed that he just so happens to like his best friend, who just so happens to be a boy. Really, everyone was taking this a lot easier than he had.
"I did," Tegoshi sniffs, "but he didn't get it. Or he did, but didn't say anything because he doesn't feel the same way. Because he likes girls. And maybe he just hates me now. Maybe I should give up."
Koyama opens his mouth, but pauses, rethinking his words, "I'm sure that's not it. I mean, you guys are "Tegomass", right?"
Tegoshi gives him a slanted look, "That's just a title for work."
"But you were practically Tegomass before Miso Soup, you know," Koyama says, patting him comfortingly on the arm. Tegoshi looks dubious. "Maybe all you need is a different approach. Like, figure out what he really likes, and then go from there?" Tegoshi tilts his head to the side and contemplates this as Koyama offers him a friendly smile. What Massu likes?
Later, after Koyama drops him off, Tegoshi walks into the living room and rummages through the shelves. His mother, bless her soul, had taped every single one of his television appearances. The ones with just him and Massu are even marked with little stickers of miso soup bowls. He spends the greater part of the night watching--and rewatching--all the videos. By the end of the last tape, Tegoshi has come to the startling conclusion that what Massu likes is food--and blonds.
-
Tegoshi invites Massu to dinner the next night, his treat. He makes sure to ask at noon, well before Massu's mother has any idea of her own dinner menu. Massu accepts easily, because when has he ever turned down a free meal? Tegoshi smiles in satisfaction when he shuts his phone. That means he has about six hours.
Massu arrives at the restaurant a little late, as usual, but Tegoshi still brightens at the sight of him walking through the doors, waves him over cheerfully. Massu smiles in recognition, then pauses, blinking. Finally, he makes his way over to Tegoshi's table, unable to take his eyes off of him. Tegoshi inwardly preens.
"What--happened to your hair?" Massu asks finally, furrowing his eyebrows. Tegoshi instantly deflates, picking at a strand of bright, blond hair.
"You don't--like it?"
"It's uhm," Massu blinks, "interesting?"
"...Is that all?"
"Er, well, it looks good, though? It suits you," Massu says quickly, waving his hands.
"Really?" Tegoshi asks, staring Massu hard in the eye. Massu looks conflicted, but visibly cheers up when the waiter comes over to take their order. Tegoshi sighs and leans his cheek against his hand, blows blond bangs away from his face the entire night.
-
"Why do you look so miserable and so blond?!"
Tegoshi looks forlornly up at Ryo, lower lip quivering, before staring back down at the floor. "N-nothing."
"Like hell. Just tell what's wrong and why the fuck you're suddenly blond, before you piss me off further," Ryo huffs impatiently, and it's his "I'm worried, but I'd rather die before I let anyone know it" voice. Tegoshi gives a watery smile at that.
"It's really nothing, I mean, it's just that--" When Ryo gives him a pointed look, Tegoshi sighs and continues, "I think I like Massu."
Ryo furrows his eyebrows, "What, did you just realize that now?"
"I--huh?" Tegoshi blinks.
"Haven't you been singing love songs to each other since you were like, fetuses or something?" Ryo snaps. Tegoshi frowns.
"With each other," he corrects.
"Where's the difference?"
Tegoshi blinks, then sighs and shakes his head, "It doesn't matter anyway. I mean, Massu likes girls, right?"
Ryo opens his mouth to reply, then thinks better of it and barks, "Then just put on a dress and show him that you're better than any girl."
Tegoshi stares. "That," he announces, "is the single stupidest thing I've ever heard."
-
"Massu!" Tegoshi bubbles excitedly when the older boy enters the room. Massu pauses, backtracks to check the name on the door to make sure it's the right room, then blinks and tilts his head to the side.
"Uhm, Tegoshi?"
"Yes?"
"...Why are you wearing a dress?"
"U-uhm, management was thinking it might be interesting if our concerts had a cosplay section too, l-like KAT-TUN," Tegoshi babbles hurriedly, picking at his skirt. "B-but, ne! Doesn't it suit me?"
Massu blinks, looks helplessly over towards Ryo, who is pointedly ignoring them both by nonchalantly reading a newspaper.
"Should you...want it to suit you?" Massu asks at last. Tegoshi opens his mouth, pauses, and then sighs, slumping his shoulders and trudging out of the room, the pink dress trailing after him. It doesn't seem to have been the answer he was looking for.
"What was that about?" Massu finally asks after Tegoshi has left.
"Maybe it's PMS," Ryo replies loftily, snickering under his breath. Massu blinks widely.
-
At the end of the day, when everyone else has gone home already, Tegoshi finds himself on the front steps of the Jimusho building, knees drawn to his chest, staring vacantly up at the sky. He decides that it's probably just hopeless, anyway. Especially if the third time was supposed to be the charm. Tegoshi snorts.
It's fine though, really. He just has to suck it up and deal with it. Deal with working in close proximity with Massu for however long. They'd still always be friends at least, best friends even. Maybe he could even be the best man at Massu's wedding. Sing at Massu's wedding. Massu's wedding to some really pretty blond woman with a nice chest and--oh my god what if she's a better singer than him!?
Tegoshi's a little too busy having an epileptic fit to notice Yamapi exiting the door behind him.
"Tegoshi?" Yamapi asks curiously, "What are you still doing here?"
"O-Oh! Yamashita-kun!" Tegoshi starts, blinking rapidly. "Uhm, nothing really. I guess I--wow, I didn't notice it was so late."
"...Is something wrong?"
Tegoshi is about to reassure Yamapi that no, nothing is wrong, and Tegoshi's really okay, even if Massu's future wife does sing better than him, but at this point Tegoshi is just too tired to even bother trying to hide it anymore and lets it all spill out about Massu and love songs and blond hair and dresses and girls.
"I think," Yamapi remarks, after Tegoshi has finally ceased rambling, "you should try telling him directly."
Tegoshi simply stares at him, as if to say, "After all of that do you think that would make any difference in the least?!" Yamapi chuckles at him, and stares down at his hands thoughtfully.
"But if you don't do it now, maybe the chance will be taken from you and you won't ever be able to," he says softly. Tegoshi blinks, opens his mouth to say something, but isnt quite sure what he should even say.
"I--"
-
When Massu finally realizes that he maybe likes his his best friend in more than just a platonic way, he pauses in midstep. "Oh," he says, like it explains everything. Which it doesn't really, but it does at least explain the curious little tugging in his chest lately, whenever Tegoshi was off doing random odd things with the other members of the group. Not that Tegoshi should only ever hang out with Massu, of course, but sometimes--sometimes it's just got a little lonely.
But Massu doesn't feel the need to overthink and overanalyze it. Sure, he's a boy, and Tegoshi's a boy, but love isn't really something you're supposed to question, right? It's what his mother has always said to him. So Massu shrugs and continues on his way, picking up his pace so that he can hurry back to catch the next train and make it on time for dinner. He rounds the corner to the studio and blinks, hearing voices.
"I--M-Massu?"
Massu blinks, recognizes the voice, looks up to see Tegoshi staring widely at him, Yamapi waving cheerfully by his side. There's that curious little tug at his heart again.
"Er--sorry. I forgot my bag in the dressing room," Massu explains, not entirely sure why he even feels the need to, though. He smiles a little, forced, and quickly makes his way into the building, hearing frantic whispers behind him. Massu gets one of the security guards to open up the dressing room for him and he spends a good five minutes staring at his reflection in the mirror. Five minutes is good enough, right? For what, Massu's not sure, but he's always liked the number five. He finally picks up his bag and slings it over his shoulder, thanks the security guard on his way out, and makes his way slowly down the stairwell. When he exits the building, he's surprised to see Tegoshi still sitting on the steps, staring vaguely up at the sky.
"Tegoshi? Where'd Yamashita-kun go?"
"E-eh? Oh. Home," Tegoshi replies, voice oddly stilted. There is a beat of silence before Massu drops his bag onto the steps and sits down next to him, closes his eyes and counts to five. When he opens his eyes, Tegoshi's face comes into focus, staring worriedly down at him. Massu can't help but laugh.
"Massu? Is--"
"Hey Tegoshi, let's get some dinner," Massu cuts him off, standing so suddenly that Tegoshi has to step back in surprise. Tegoshi blinks.
"Didn't you leave early because you wanted to be on time for dinner?" he asks curiously, tilting his head to the side.
Massu jams his hands into his pockets and shrugs, grinning sheepishly, "I missed the train and the next one home won't come for a while. By then I'll be too hungry."
Tegoshi still looks perplexed, but nods after a moment of hesitation, "All right." Massu's grin only widens as he starts walking ahead, lacing his hands behind his back.
"Great! Cause I think I have something to tell you."
"Oh? What is it?" Tegoshi asks eagerly, jogging after him until they're walking side by side.
"Food first," Massu replies lightly, and Tegoshi pouts.
"Ehh! What's that about?" he whines, tugging at Massu's sleeve impatiently. Massu laughs, but pauses when he feels Tegoshi's hand slip into his. He glances over, but Tegoshi is staring resolutely ahead.
"Five," he says suddenly, and Tegoshi gives him an odd look.
"You're so weird," he mutters, shaking his head, but his lips curve just a touch. Massu doesn't say anything else, just smiles and laces their fingers together.
From: cynicalism
SEASON'S GREETINGS!
Title: Boys Will be Boys
Pairing/Group: Massu/Tegoshi (NewS)
Rating: PG
Notes: Merry Christmas viivu! I hope I do not disappoint! Also, much love to my beta, who is made of shiny awesomeness.
Summary: Boys will be boys.
When Tegoshi finally realizes that he maybe likes his best friend in more than just a platonic way, he does what any other shiny pop idol in his circumstance would do. He freaks the hell out--and still looks amazing as he does it, of course. But that's besides the point. Tegoshi is a boy. And boys like girls. Boys should like girls. And it doesn't matter how pretty Massu might look with his hair kind of disheveled and his eyes all squinty and his mouth--girls.
Tegoshi shakes his head and rationalizes, because he's not just a shiny pop idol--he's also a psychology major, and it's kind of what they do. So Tegoshi thinks that he's clearly just overworked and overstressed and has been spending maybe a little too much time with Massu lately, which would totally lead to strange thoughts about one's best friend. Sure. Tegoshi then decides to right this matter in the only way he knows how. He rummages around his room until he finds an old issue of Myojo, and flips through the pages for the first cute girl he can find. He lands on a page with Aragaki Yui, who is a cute girl. He thought so when they had been co-stars in My Boss My Hero, too, so clearly, Tegoshi is a normal boy who likes cute girls. Yes. And didn't Yui star in that one drama with Toda Erika, another cute girl? And hadn't she been in the same drama as Nishihara Aki, who had also starred in the same drama as Massu and--damnit.
Tegoshi kicks the magazine away in a huff and closes his eyes, tries hard not to think about Massu and that weird, fluttery feeling he had had in his chest last night on the train when they were going home and the light had hit Massu's face just so it looked like his eyes were dancing, and then Massu had grinned and leaned over, touching their shoulders together lightly and laughing and--Tegoshi fails. Spectacularly. Feels his cheeks redden and his face grow warm at the thought. He claws at his hair in frustration before falling back onto the floor in a miserable, attractive heap. What's he supposed to do now? It's not like Massu is--he wouldn't possibly, maybe--
Tegoshi pouts, glances over and catches sight of something else in the magazine. It's the July issue, and a two page spread of himself and Massu stares almost mockingly back at him. Tegoshi frowns--or tries to, anyway, he's a little distracted by Massu in plaid--when something interesting catches his eye.
"Confession," Tegoshi reads blankly, staring at the tiny image of himself handing Massu a love letter--the irony of it all stabbing him repeatedly in the skull. It's then that Tegoshi finally decides to do what any other shiny and rational pop-idol-slash-psychology-major in his circumstance would do.
He decides to ask Shige for advice.
-
"Shige, I think I like Massu," Tegoshi says cautiously, when the two are having lunch the next day. Shige looks up from his burger and blinks, swallows.
"Okay." He takes a sip of his coke. Tegoshi blinks, lips quivering.
"N-no wait! I don't think you heard me correctly! I said I like Massu. As in, like like."
Shige blinks, nods a little, "Okay."
"Shige!" Tegoshi whines, "I'm being serious here!"
"...Okay."
"Shouldn't you have more of a reaction than that?!"
"Uhm, why?"
"Because we're both boys!" Tegoshi wails, slamming his hands onto the table, and pointedly ignoring the looks he's garnering from the other patrons in the restaurant. Shige stares for a good moment, before his eyes widen and his lips part and he points at Tegoshi with his index finger.
"You're a boy?!"
A minute later finds Shige clutching at his shin, hissing in pain as Tegoshi camly takes a sip of his iced tea.
"Ten years of soccer, three months of soccer," Tegoshi clucks. Shige glares.
"What's the problem, anyway? So you like like Massu. It's not like that's news to anyone," Shige huffs, still smarting from the blow.
"W-what? Really!?" It had been news to him! Tegoshi bites his lip, worried, "Then, do you think Massu already knows?"
"...It's Massu," Shige replies, amused. "He probably wouldn't get it unless you told him straight out." At Tegoshi's silence, Shige pauses, "Were you--not going to say anything?"
Tegoshi picks at his fries, frowning as he smears ketchup all over his plate, "Massu likes girls."
Shige opens his mouth to retort, before closing it, wisely deciding to sidestep the obvious comment. He clears his throat and says instead, "But you l--ike Massu." Tegoshi doesn't say anything at that, and Shige sighs and scratches his head.
"But how would you tell your best friend of so many years that you suddenly like him as maybe more than a friend?" Tegoshi asks is a small voice.
Shige purses his lips, leans his chin on top of laced fingers, and ponders this fact as Tegoshi continues to stare dejectedly at the ketchup smear on his plate that is looking increasingly like a heart by the second. Tegoshi wrinkles his nose and piles the rest of his fries on top of it.
"Maybe you can write him a song," Shige finally suggests, after Tegoshi has succeeded in covering every bit of ketchup on his plate. Tegoshi pauses, stares at him for a good moment, before his eyes widen and his lips part and he almost sends china and silverware crashing to the floor in his haste to tackle the other boy into a hug.
"Shige is a genius!"
-
Tegoshi spends the greater part of the night writing his song, carefully and meticulously choosing each and every word. He finally finishes and hops into bed at four in the morning, and even though he only catches two hours of sleep before he has to go to work, Tegoshi finds that he's more awake than ever. And when Massu finally walks into the dressing room, five minutes late, but ten minutes earlier than he usually is, Tegoshi immediately bounds up to him, composition notebook in hand.
"Ne, Massu! I wrote some lyrics down, yesterday. Wanna take a look?" Tegoshi asks, trying not to sound as if he had spent the greater part of an hour thinking up that line. Massu grins.
"Sure!"
"It's about two people who've been friends for a really long time, and don't realize until the very end that they really, really like each other," Tegoshi says slowly, gauging Massu's expression as the older boy reads through the lyrics. When Massu finishes, he looks up and smiles like he in that way that makes Tegoshi's chest flutter-flutter all over again.
"Aha, Tegoshi really likes these kinds of mushy words, ne?" Massu laughs cheerfully, handing Tegoshi the notebook. "It's good though. Maybe Shige can make up the melody for it and you guys can have another duet at our next concert."
Tegoshi blinks, still wondering if this is just some kind of joke, as Massu neatly sets up his things in his corner of the counter, humming to himself.
When Shige asks him how things went later, Tegoshi glares and chucks a balled up piece of paper at his head, "Shige is an idiot."
-
But Tegoshi finds that he isn't actually all that deterred by his first failed attempt at a confession, or the fact that Massu had suggested for Tegoshi to have a duet with someone else. Not really, no. He clearly hadn't been thinking straight when he had asked Shige of all people for advice. The boy might be smart in academics, but he's not so bright on the emotional side of life. That's when Tegoshi decides that person he should've turned to from the beginning is NewS's resident Member-Ai expert himself--Koyama. So after they're done for the day, Tegoshi quickly latches onto Koyama's arm and grins.
"Say Koyama, I haven't been able to eat your mom's ramen for a really long time."
Koyama laughs and pats him on the head, tells him, "Sure! Let's go!"
They're about halfway through the meal when Tegoshi finds he can't be patient anymore and he drops his chopsticks into his bowl and blurts out, "KoyamaIreallyneedyourhelpIthinkImightpossiblylikeMassuandIdon'tknowwhattodoaboutit." He says it so rapidly, in just a single breath, that Koyama has to take a moment to bask in pride, before digesting Tegoshi's actual words.
"Oh! Well, have you tried confessing already?" Koyama asks conversationally, like Tegoshi hadn't just revealed that he just so happens to like his best friend, who just so happens to be a boy. Really, everyone was taking this a lot easier than he had.
"I did," Tegoshi sniffs, "but he didn't get it. Or he did, but didn't say anything because he doesn't feel the same way. Because he likes girls. And maybe he just hates me now. Maybe I should give up."
Koyama opens his mouth, but pauses, rethinking his words, "I'm sure that's not it. I mean, you guys are "Tegomass", right?"
Tegoshi gives him a slanted look, "That's just a title for work."
"But you were practically Tegomass before Miso Soup, you know," Koyama says, patting him comfortingly on the arm. Tegoshi looks dubious. "Maybe all you need is a different approach. Like, figure out what he really likes, and then go from there?" Tegoshi tilts his head to the side and contemplates this as Koyama offers him a friendly smile. What Massu likes?
Later, after Koyama drops him off, Tegoshi walks into the living room and rummages through the shelves. His mother, bless her soul, had taped every single one of his television appearances. The ones with just him and Massu are even marked with little stickers of miso soup bowls. He spends the greater part of the night watching--and rewatching--all the videos. By the end of the last tape, Tegoshi has come to the startling conclusion that what Massu likes is food--and blonds.
-
Tegoshi invites Massu to dinner the next night, his treat. He makes sure to ask at noon, well before Massu's mother has any idea of her own dinner menu. Massu accepts easily, because when has he ever turned down a free meal? Tegoshi smiles in satisfaction when he shuts his phone. That means he has about six hours.
Massu arrives at the restaurant a little late, as usual, but Tegoshi still brightens at the sight of him walking through the doors, waves him over cheerfully. Massu smiles in recognition, then pauses, blinking. Finally, he makes his way over to Tegoshi's table, unable to take his eyes off of him. Tegoshi inwardly preens.
"What--happened to your hair?" Massu asks finally, furrowing his eyebrows. Tegoshi instantly deflates, picking at a strand of bright, blond hair.
"You don't--like it?"
"It's uhm," Massu blinks, "interesting?"
"...Is that all?"
"Er, well, it looks good, though? It suits you," Massu says quickly, waving his hands.
"Really?" Tegoshi asks, staring Massu hard in the eye. Massu looks conflicted, but visibly cheers up when the waiter comes over to take their order. Tegoshi sighs and leans his cheek against his hand, blows blond bangs away from his face the entire night.
-
"Why do you look so miserable and so blond?!"
Tegoshi looks forlornly up at Ryo, lower lip quivering, before staring back down at the floor. "N-nothing."
"Like hell. Just tell what's wrong and why the fuck you're suddenly blond, before you piss me off further," Ryo huffs impatiently, and it's his "I'm worried, but I'd rather die before I let anyone know it" voice. Tegoshi gives a watery smile at that.
"It's really nothing, I mean, it's just that--" When Ryo gives him a pointed look, Tegoshi sighs and continues, "I think I like Massu."
Ryo furrows his eyebrows, "What, did you just realize that now?"
"I--huh?" Tegoshi blinks.
"Haven't you been singing love songs to each other since you were like, fetuses or something?" Ryo snaps. Tegoshi frowns.
"With each other," he corrects.
"Where's the difference?"
Tegoshi blinks, then sighs and shakes his head, "It doesn't matter anyway. I mean, Massu likes girls, right?"
Ryo opens his mouth to reply, then thinks better of it and barks, "Then just put on a dress and show him that you're better than any girl."
Tegoshi stares. "That," he announces, "is the single stupidest thing I've ever heard."
-
"Massu!" Tegoshi bubbles excitedly when the older boy enters the room. Massu pauses, backtracks to check the name on the door to make sure it's the right room, then blinks and tilts his head to the side.
"Uhm, Tegoshi?"
"Yes?"
"...Why are you wearing a dress?"
"U-uhm, management was thinking it might be interesting if our concerts had a cosplay section too, l-like KAT-TUN," Tegoshi babbles hurriedly, picking at his skirt. "B-but, ne! Doesn't it suit me?"
Massu blinks, looks helplessly over towards Ryo, who is pointedly ignoring them both by nonchalantly reading a newspaper.
"Should you...want it to suit you?" Massu asks at last. Tegoshi opens his mouth, pauses, and then sighs, slumping his shoulders and trudging out of the room, the pink dress trailing after him. It doesn't seem to have been the answer he was looking for.
"What was that about?" Massu finally asks after Tegoshi has left.
"Maybe it's PMS," Ryo replies loftily, snickering under his breath. Massu blinks widely.
-
At the end of the day, when everyone else has gone home already, Tegoshi finds himself on the front steps of the Jimusho building, knees drawn to his chest, staring vacantly up at the sky. He decides that it's probably just hopeless, anyway. Especially if the third time was supposed to be the charm. Tegoshi snorts.
It's fine though, really. He just has to suck it up and deal with it. Deal with working in close proximity with Massu for however long. They'd still always be friends at least, best friends even. Maybe he could even be the best man at Massu's wedding. Sing at Massu's wedding. Massu's wedding to some really pretty blond woman with a nice chest and--oh my god what if she's a better singer than him!?
Tegoshi's a little too busy having an epileptic fit to notice Yamapi exiting the door behind him.
"Tegoshi?" Yamapi asks curiously, "What are you still doing here?"
"O-Oh! Yamashita-kun!" Tegoshi starts, blinking rapidly. "Uhm, nothing really. I guess I--wow, I didn't notice it was so late."
"...Is something wrong?"
Tegoshi is about to reassure Yamapi that no, nothing is wrong, and Tegoshi's really okay, even if Massu's future wife does sing better than him, but at this point Tegoshi is just too tired to even bother trying to hide it anymore and lets it all spill out about Massu and love songs and blond hair and dresses and girls.
"I think," Yamapi remarks, after Tegoshi has finally ceased rambling, "you should try telling him directly."
Tegoshi simply stares at him, as if to say, "After all of that do you think that would make any difference in the least?!" Yamapi chuckles at him, and stares down at his hands thoughtfully.
"But if you don't do it now, maybe the chance will be taken from you and you won't ever be able to," he says softly. Tegoshi blinks, opens his mouth to say something, but isnt quite sure what he should even say.
"I--"
-
When Massu finally realizes that he maybe likes his his best friend in more than just a platonic way, he pauses in midstep. "Oh," he says, like it explains everything. Which it doesn't really, but it does at least explain the curious little tugging in his chest lately, whenever Tegoshi was off doing random odd things with the other members of the group. Not that Tegoshi should only ever hang out with Massu, of course, but sometimes--sometimes it's just got a little lonely.
But Massu doesn't feel the need to overthink and overanalyze it. Sure, he's a boy, and Tegoshi's a boy, but love isn't really something you're supposed to question, right? It's what his mother has always said to him. So Massu shrugs and continues on his way, picking up his pace so that he can hurry back to catch the next train and make it on time for dinner. He rounds the corner to the studio and blinks, hearing voices.
"I--M-Massu?"
Massu blinks, recognizes the voice, looks up to see Tegoshi staring widely at him, Yamapi waving cheerfully by his side. There's that curious little tug at his heart again.
"Er--sorry. I forgot my bag in the dressing room," Massu explains, not entirely sure why he even feels the need to, though. He smiles a little, forced, and quickly makes his way into the building, hearing frantic whispers behind him. Massu gets one of the security guards to open up the dressing room for him and he spends a good five minutes staring at his reflection in the mirror. Five minutes is good enough, right? For what, Massu's not sure, but he's always liked the number five. He finally picks up his bag and slings it over his shoulder, thanks the security guard on his way out, and makes his way slowly down the stairwell. When he exits the building, he's surprised to see Tegoshi still sitting on the steps, staring vaguely up at the sky.
"Tegoshi? Where'd Yamashita-kun go?"
"E-eh? Oh. Home," Tegoshi replies, voice oddly stilted. There is a beat of silence before Massu drops his bag onto the steps and sits down next to him, closes his eyes and counts to five. When he opens his eyes, Tegoshi's face comes into focus, staring worriedly down at him. Massu can't help but laugh.
"Massu? Is--"
"Hey Tegoshi, let's get some dinner," Massu cuts him off, standing so suddenly that Tegoshi has to step back in surprise. Tegoshi blinks.
"Didn't you leave early because you wanted to be on time for dinner?" he asks curiously, tilting his head to the side.
Massu jams his hands into his pockets and shrugs, grinning sheepishly, "I missed the train and the next one home won't come for a while. By then I'll be too hungry."
Tegoshi still looks perplexed, but nods after a moment of hesitation, "All right." Massu's grin only widens as he starts walking ahead, lacing his hands behind his back.
"Great! Cause I think I have something to tell you."
"Oh? What is it?" Tegoshi asks eagerly, jogging after him until they're walking side by side.
"Food first," Massu replies lightly, and Tegoshi pouts.
"Ehh! What's that about?" he whines, tugging at Massu's sleeve impatiently. Massu laughs, but pauses when he feels Tegoshi's hand slip into his. He glances over, but Tegoshi is staring resolutely ahead.
"Five," he says suddenly, and Tegoshi gives him an odd look.
"You're so weird," he mutters, shaking his head, but his lips curve just a touch. Massu doesn't say anything else, just smiles and laces their fingers together.