In Search of A Hive
Title: In Search of A Hive
Authors: janna_hawkins , oodlycan
Summary: A Wraith in a store uniform came up to them and smiled."Can I eat...I mean help you?"
Characters: Willow, Sky
Author Notes: Written on Facebook Chat with Willow. Most of our most random fics come from that application so we love it. All I did was clean it up from a chat format. If you haven't seen Stargate Atlantis this probably won't make any sense to you :)
~..~
Not too long ago on a planet not far away, two fangirls were sitting near a large Wraith Hive ship and discussing fangirly
things. Both wore jeans and black shirts that proudly proclaimed, "fanfiction, fanvideos and fangirling, this is the NFA."
After a short silence, the redhead turned to the brunette and grinned. "So we'll have to find you a hive ship. Then we could
gang up on your sister."
The brunette nodded and snickered evilly, which the redhead joined in with after a moment.
After a few minutes of this, the redhead frowned. "But where is a good place to get one? And for a decent price?"
"Hmm Wal-Mart?"
"They might have them but not in the best quality."
"Yeah you're right. Hive Ships R Us maybe?"
The redhead grinned. "Sounds like a good place."
"Yeah either there or K-Wraith," the brunette joked.
"Well I got mine at Todd's Hive Ship Emporium. I got the five finger discount."
"Ah. I see."
"If you want we could go there again."
"Sure!"
"Might have to disguise myself but it'd be worth it."
"Yeah." The brunette snapped her fingers and suddenly Catherine Tate was standing where the other girl had been.
The redhead felt her new face and grinned widely. "Wow ok that works! Ok then! To Todd's Hive Ship Emporium."
"Allons-y!"
The two girls climbed into the hive ship and the redhead started up the hyper drive.
"Wheee!" the brunette giggled as the ship quickly shot past Warp 70.
At the controls, the redhead bounced up and down. "Omigosh I'm like so hyper! Why? 'Cos we turned on the hyper drive!"
The brunette snickered. "Yeah maybe!"
A few seconds later the ship stopped and the redhead let go of the controls. "We're there!"
A Wraith in the room raised his eyebrows. "That was fast."
The two girls giggled for a moment before the redhead turned to him and said, "It's 'cos we're traveling at the speed of
fandom."
"Exactly!"
The Wraith rolled his eyes. "Whatev. I'm gonna go to Starbucks."
"Don't you mean HumanLifeBucks?" the brunette joked.
"No," the Wraith said slowly as he left.
Once he had gone the brunette turned to the other girl and shrugged. "Wow he's got no sense of humor whatsoever."
"Well apparently Todd was the only one with a sense of humor."
"Must be."
"Anyway we're here that's all that matters right now."
"True."
The two left the ship and entered the huge shopping mall sized store.
"Hello everybody!" the redhead called as the doors shut behind them.
The Wraith in the store all looked at the two humans and many began drooling.
A Wraith in a store uniform came up to them and smiled."Can I eat...I mean help you?"
The brunette glared at him. "Oi! Don’t you get any ideas, you."
"Oh, I wouldn't dream of it. Besides redheads aren't my type."
The brunette pointed to her hair and scowled. "Do I look ginger to you?!"
The redhead nudged the other and frowned. "That's why he wants to suck out your soul!"
"No, it's the Replicators that want to suck out your soul," the Wraith protested.
"Sure," the brunette snapped, still scowling at the Wraith.
The Wraith nodded slowly and tried to smile again. "Anyway, my name is Billy."
"Sheppard must have named him," the redhead whispered loudly.
"Yeah he must have," the other girl replied just as quietly.
Billy glared at them. "If you ever say that name again I'll..."
"You'll what, Billy, you'll what?"
"Yeah you'll what?" the brunette asked with a grin. "Suck the life out of potential customers?"
"Grr...I'll..show you the way to the ships."
"Lead on then, Billy boy," the redhead replied cheerfully.
"This should be good."
The three of them began walking between the various Hive Ships in the store, ignoring the other still drooling Wraith.
"Is there a certain model you're looking for?"
"Yeah, something fast that'll go with my solar surfer," the brunette replied.
"Well, in that case you'll want the Speedster 300. Up to 400 times faster and you'll save a bundle by not having to buy too
many ZPM's."
"Hmm that sounds alright. How does it look?"
"Let me show you," Billy said as he led them to a sleek Hive. "It's smaller so that way it'll go faster."
The redhead frowned. "But what about weapons? A girl's got to defend herself."
The Wraith nodded slowly. "It has the latest Wraith tech and weaponry although for weapons it'll cost extra."
"Money is no object...I've always wanted to say that," the brunette said with a giggle.
"Now is a good time," the redhead replied.
Billy smiled tightly. "So I'll put you down for a Speedster 300, but how much weaponry do you want?"
"As much as possible in case I run into a fleet of Ha'taks."
"But what about the Ori or Replicators?"
"Um, well I might have to go to Atlantis for some upgrades but I'm sure Rodney and Radek would be willing to help."
"And if not we have ways of making people talk," the redhead said with an evil snicker.
"Ok then one speedster 300 with the works!" Billy said quickly. "Would you like it gift wrapped?"
"Sure if that's possible."
"Ok boys get to work!"
The other Wraith grumbled but began to wrap up the Hive Ship.
"Now how will you be paying me?" To himself he added, "With your soul I hope."
The brunette pulled out a small black wallet. "With this!"
"Oh so you're paying with ZPMs. A wise choice
The brunette glanced at the paper. "Ah yes of course...ZPM's."
"Yeah ZPM's," the redhead said, trying not to giggle.
Billy took the ZPM and smiled. "Pleasure doing business with you. Feel free to come by any time!"
"Sure Billy...we might even bring Sheppard along next time," the brunette said with a smirk.
The Wraith hissed loudly at the name. "Leave now and I won't call my Wraith upon you."
"Oh, like we couldn't take 'em."
The redhead nodded. "Exactly."
"Leave!"
"Ok ok! Ohmigosh no need to be pushy!"
"Yeah seriously!" the brunette said as they exited the store with the new ship.
Outside, the two girls turned to look at one another. "Great now we get to unwrap it," the redhead said.
The brunette grinned and began ripping off the paper as the redhead used her sonic lipstick to tear some.
"It's like Christmas and your birthday all in one!"
"Yeah!” the brunette laughed. "It's awesome!"
Billy opened the door to the store and rolled his eyes. "Yeesh. You humans and your random celebrations."
"Whatever, Billy," the redhead snapped. "Don't be hating on Earth."
"Yeah or else...we'll send Sheppard after you," the brunette added with an evil laugh.
The Wraith closed the shop doors and placed a 'closed' sign in a window.
Finally all the paper is torn off and the brunette steps back to admire the shiny new ship. "Wow pretty..."
"No one will dare mess with you now! Either that or get distracted by the shininess of it."
"Yeah there is that. The monster is doomed!"
"You know it!"
"I can't wait!"
After a few moments, the redhead sighed. "Well, guess this is where we part...for now anyway."
"Until we next meet up and annoy random people."
"May the time winds grant you an even speedier trip."
"And you!" the brunette said before climbing into the shiny new Hive.
"Thanks!" the redhead called before getting into her own Hive Ship.
The two ships flew off into the distance as the words To Be Continued flashed onto the screen.