239/240, Saturday Morning

[janet_fraiser]

Morning came entirely too early. Not that Janet had gone to sleep late, but she didn't particularly want to get out of bed right now. Or talk to Liz. Or anyone, really. So she lay in bed with her eyes closed, pretending to sleep. With any luck, she'd fall back asleep again soon.

OOC: Locked to Liz Weir.

Comments

[janet_fraiser]

"Well, you're certainly acting like one right now," snapped Janet. "Though I doubt that's why you're overreacting. For crying out loud, Liz, could you maybe look at me some time?"

[janet_fraiser]

"Is that it? Am I hurting you too much for you to want to stay with me?" She held herself still again. "Or are we too close and this is because you can't accept a dangerous posting halfway across the world."

[notcalledlizzie]

Elizabeth pulled away from her pillow long enough to wipe her hand across her eyes. "I don't know," she whispered. "I want to be with you, but it's not going to be forever. And I guess these five days is just going to be like what it will be."

[janet_fraiser]

"Do me the favor," said Janet, her voice more calm than she felt. "Of not pretending that you want to do this for my sake, then. You're trying to make an unknown future a certainty." She drew her knees back up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them to try and stop herself from trembling. "I'm sorry I keep hurting you. I'm sorry you want to run away from me. But I can't fall out of love with one or the other of you to make things easier. Do you think I haven't tried?"

[notcalledlizzie]

"I'm sorry," Elizabeth whispered, leaning against the pillow once more. "I don't want to run away from you. And it doesn't seem to be something I can do anyway."

[janet_fraiser]

"If you don't want to, then why are you doing it?" asked Janet, her voice barely audible.

[notcalledlizzie]

"Because I'm in so deep and I don't know what else to do," Elizabeth replied, her voice equally low. She turned her head to look at Janet; her eyes glistening with tears.

[janet_fraiser]

"I don't know what to do either." She met Liz's eyes. "But running away really doesn't solve anything. Especially when I'd have to see you every day."

[notcalledlizzie]

Elizabeth just crumpled and leant her forehead on the bed and began to sob loudly. She was trying to talk, but it was mostly unintelligle.

[janet_fraiser]

Janet unclenched her hands and unwrapped her arms from around her legs, then leaned down to put one hand on Liz's back. "Come here," she said, trying to draw Liz into her arms.

[notcalledlizzie]

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," Elizabeth repeated, still sobbing as she moved into Janet's arms.

[janet_fraiser]

Janet bit her lip as she held Liz, trying to stop the tears that threatened to spill over. "I know," she said, stroking Liz's hair. "Me too. I'm sorry." She choked back a sob. "It's okay."

[notcalledlizzie]

Elizabeth clung to Janet as she started to calm down. "Was being an idiot," she mumbled. "Don't let me be an idiot."

[janet_fraiser]

"You're not an idiot," Janet whispered, clinging right back. "I'm scared too."

[notcalledlizzie]

"Be scared together. Better than being apart," Elizabeth whispered. "I love you."

[janet_fraiser]

Janet nodded. "I love you too," she whispered, blinking to clear her eyes of the tears that wouldn't go away.