Fic: Gray
Title: Gray
Author: J.D. aka jade_dragoness
Summary: Loki ends up breaking him after all. Clint knows he’ll never be put back together now.
Pairing: Clint Barton/Phil Coulson
Rating: PG
Warnings: Spoilers! & Angst
Word Count: 425
Disclaimer: Never ever will be mine. *sadness*
A/N: Getting the feels out.
Feedback is hugely welcomed.
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AO3 Link
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Author: J.D. aka jade_dragoness
Summary: Loki ends up breaking him after all. Clint knows he’ll never be put back together now.
Pairing: Clint Barton/Phil Coulson
Rating: PG
Warnings: Spoilers! & Angst
Word Count: 425
Disclaimer: Never ever will be mine. *sadness*
A/N: Getting the feels out.
Feedback is hugely welcomed.
*-*-*-*
AO3 Link
*-*-*-*
- Clint’s head was fucked after Loki. It was thoroughly fucked but he knew… no he was sure he could deal with it.
Until his heart shattered when Tasha told him about Phil.
He hadn’t believed it at first. Hell, he’d spent most of the day thinking it had to be a mistake. Someone had just thought they’d seen Phil get hit but he was fine, maybe banged up but ultimately alive. He even asked Fury if he could see him. Fury’s expression… he’d never seen the Director look so brittle until he told Clint that he‘d been there. He‘d heard the medics call T.O.D. It was no mistake.
It took Tasha sneaking into the morgue and returning with a picture for him to believe it.
Phil was dead.
He spent the next forty hours curled up on his bunk in the Helicarrier, not moving. Not sleeping. Barely even blinking. Just staring into the dark. And feeling… nothing.
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At forty hours and one minute he’d remembered about the L.M.D.s.
He snuck out of his bunk, and broke into the secure hold which held the life model decoys of S.H.I.E.L.D.’s top officers, among them: Nick Fury, Maria Hill, and Phil Coulson. Phil’s L.M.D. was still there in its protective aluminum crate.
Clint opened the crate up and stared at it for several hours. Memorizing again the pattern of hairs. The curl of familiar lips. The jut of a chin molded to perfect specifications. All with skin colored pink instead of gray. Then he turned it on.
The L.M.D. started breathing. Slow and steady breaths. It opened achingly perfect replicated blue eyes.
“Agent Barton. Clint,” it said as soon as it saw him. Clint’s knees cut off from under him and he sat abruptly on the metal floor at the sound of the perfectly mimicked familiar voice. The L.M.D. sat up and stared at him. “What is my assignment?”
Clint closed his eyes and ignored the pressure on his chest. “Tell me you love me.”
“I love you.” The voice was flat.
“Say it like you mean it. Say it like he would.”
A beat of silence. Then a soft nearly inaudible: “I love you, Clint.”
Clint hunched over. His heart feeling like it was breaking all over again. He choked out. “Tell me… tell me… say you‘ll never leave me.”
Sincere and still sounding perfectly like Phil. “I‘ll never leave you.”
Clint pressed his forehead against the metal crate which held the L.M.D. as it breathed and blinked and could pass for living Phil Coulson. And he cried.
End