I never thought I'd get all swoony over something like a little school boy.  However, the web comic "The Young Protectors" save for the just overwhelming wham bam of it was OMFG.  I swooned totally over it.  Most, would see the smut value in it.  I...saw feelings I've missed.  The story was top notch like -any- marvel comic.  The artistic value was ( Read more... )

I have been fighting so very long and so very hard against the darkness and nihilism in my heart.  I fight back the pain and anger with each breath I take. I fight against my dwindling faith in humanity as a whole.  Even my safehaven of fur life has not recharged my hope in life or in people.  It's gotten to the point to where I've spent my moments ( Read more... )

I saw this photo via someone's facebook and memories of happier times long gone by had flooded my mind.  My parents were alive. MTV was my baby sitter and I could look forward to two things. After school video games and Saturday morning cartoons.  It's funny how memories chain together...

That:


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I had a nice discussion with him last night.  I finally obtained -new- information out of him in the mix of rehash.  He's wanting to pretty much be friends with everyone. No boyfriends. No mates. Also, that being said, I noted changes in him last night that I'd hoped for years for him to make. I kind of laugh at the irony.  I became desperate and ( Read more... )

Well, life goes onward ever still.  I'm still not sure how to proceed with it all. I've had a wide variety of emotions over the whole thing I've been blogging about now probably at nauseum to my reading audience. I thought I had it together since last post. I mean the boy physically turned my stomach and chilled me to the bone with his wishy-washy ( Read more... )

I think, by the by this has to be one of the most awkward and strange situations I've ever gotten myself into.  I went through a two week period of regrets and re-evaluations of everything.  I'm here to tell you a sudden change of heart couldn't have come at a more complicated time.  I've whined about it. I have more than cried about it.  I even ( Read more... )

I began to clean up some today because I didn't want Monday and Tuesday to be filled with having to bring this place back up to acceptable standards only to find the air conditioner filled the bedroom with water.  So, in order to bring everything up to par it's going to cost even more money I don't have.  My housemate was supposed to use the snake ( Read more... )

Last post had spawned over much time I took to myself thoughts not of a relationship for once.  A strange kind of calm has washed over me and for once I began to think of what it is that I can do with my life and my time relationship status or lack thereof not withstanding.  What is it I want to do with my time?  Who is it that I want to become?   ( Read more... )

Hey guys, the things I said have made some headway and for one of the first times in a while. I heard....not just listened. I know,  I was on the same page with my ex to some degree.  I'm proud of the fact that I could honestly maintain objectivity in the face of pain.  We had a very frank discussion today that really before never could have taken ( Read more... )

I've really been an emotional wreck these last few days.  I never thought that this day would ever come to where I regret my actions even if they were firmly justifiable...as evidenced all throughout this blog.  I don't know what to do for the first time ever.  It's easy, to point fingers.  It's very easy to give up and accept things at status quo ( Read more... )