Made To Be Broken: The Meta Post

[iwrotestuff]

Made To Be Broken: The Meta Post

So, a lot of things kept coming up in the comments, and I just couldn't really address them at the time without giving away too much of what was always planned.

Just in case it needs to be said, this post contains spoilers for the entire series.

Comments

[sarinmorphine]

*raises hand* as part of my apology - if you still wanted to somehow do that chapter with the cross, I am the handiest, manliest woman ever and I know a lot about carpentry.

Mostly because the "holy fuck" joke just needs to be made, but also because I feel bad.

[iwrotestuff]

I don't know that I'll revisit things too much, given how things ended, but we'll see. If I do, I will definitely hit you up. :)

[brimtoast]

Oh god, if ever there was a moment for this macro:

[brimtoast]

That second paragraph was terribly unclear, and I care about this, so I am going to try to rephrase. Ahem:

Relationships are not binary. And that's such an important thing to talk about, because life can become so confusing when every relationship has to constantly fit into one side or the other of this supposed friendship/romance dichotomy. The reality is that not only do interpersonal relationships not map onto a dichotomy, they don't even map onto a continuum, since that would imply something two-dimensional, and there are so many dimensions to relationships: friendly affection and sexual attraction and crush-feelings and wanting-to-cuddle and all sorts of other feelings that can each vary independently. The words we have to talk about relationships don't even *begin* to cover the actual range of possibilities and complexities for how one person can feel about another. It just has a couple broad labels (boyfriend/girlfriend, friend, crush, fuckbuddy) that you have to stretch to fit yourself into and that almost never feels

[iwrotestuff]

Without bringing in too much of my own personal baggage, I have to say that I am beyond frustrated by the notion that Darren articulates of aknowledgement of feeling --leads to--> "dating" --leads to--> "relationship" --leads to--> "happily ever after" I've been there, done that, and came to the hard realization that "happily ever after" really isn't. There are so few socially acceptable options for exploring affection for / connection to another person, and it really, really bothers me.

"And I think often the tendency is to try to compare oneself to the idea of the label and to always feel anxious about the places of non-matching, like that is somehow a problem with the *relationship,* when of course the truth is that it's a problem with the woefully inadequate label."I love this so much, it almost hurts. The friend who indirectly inspired this is a sworn bachelor. There's nothing wrong with that. What I do think there's something wrong with is the fact that he thinks that never wanting to get married or live with another

[iwrotestuff]

Thank you so much - I may have fallen into the initial plot and themes for this series unintentionally, but once I knew what it was about and where it was going, I was very, very serious about it. It's really easy to read smut and just focus on the hormones, and I was intensely concerned about showing that it wasn't just about getting off. It fills a very deep psychological need for each of them, and (not to sound too much like REAL LIFE Darren,) I really wanted to treat that with respect and care

[wincie]

I just want to say I admire your work and research. This post just amazes me. I read a lot of dom/sub fic before, but a lot of time it was just smut for smut. But yours is different. Yours is more thoughtful and has a lot of thing goes under it. (I don't know how to describe it well since English's not my first language lol) Just please write more! And this post clears a lot of confusions for me with the fic too! :D

[iwrotestuff]

Thank you. I don't know that I'll be writing anything more along the D/s lines. I feel like I said what I wanted to say with this series, and there may not be much left for me to explore. I'm not ruling it out; I'm just saying I don't see it happening at this point in time.

I try really hard to always have something beneath the surface. It's a big part of what makes something fun for me to write, and I think it's an important part of the challenge. With this, I had a lot to work with. It is, in a way, the most personal thing I've ever written. There's a lot of me in both of them, and writing this really helped me clarify some things for myself.

[iwrotestuff]

I wavered on writing this, to be honest. On one hand, I really wanted to tackle some of the things that I either didn't have the space to explore within the story or couldn't without tipping my hand too early. There really were so many fascinating conversations that came out of the comments though, and I really, really wanted an opportunity to get into some of those issues in a little more depth. I'm aware that it's incredibly self-indulgent, but sometimes, I think you've just got to be.

I've been reading about sex since before I was having it. At first, it was because I wanted to be prepared when the time came. Later, it became about trying to explore all the sticky grey areas that come with it. Sex isn't this neat and pretty little thing that we can just slap with a bow and a tag saying THIS IS THIS AND IT IS ONLY THIS AND THIS IS ALL IT SHALL EVER BE. It's messy, and it's complicated, and that's kind of what makes it so great. For me, at least, but as I've freely admitted in the past - I like things that challenge me.

So this is pretty long.

[klainechriss]

You, Odd....are amazing, and insane. Honestly, I've never seen- or, well, read about, really- anyone who's worked so hard or for so long on a story. And I though writing for two hours was a long time- but twenty two? Holy fuck

Re: So this is pretty long.

[iwrotestuff]

Yup. Twenty-two hours just on Chapter Ten. Eight of those on just the first 1,100 words. What can I say? I'm dedicated, that way.

I'm glad you like my thoughts re: sex as language. It's been a pet thought of mine for a while, and it's always nice to see the way people respond to it. What can I say? Talking about sex gives me an intellectual boner. ;D

I have to have music playing, too. For the most part, I used the soundtrack. Sometimes, though, I had to just hit shuffle on the whole library, or I thought I'd go insane. That's how the last three songs on the soundtrack came to fit in, actually. "Collide" is Darren's "A-HA!" moment, "F.E.E.L.I.N.G.C.A.L.L.E.D.L.O.V.E." is Chris's, and "Ask For Answers" kind of describes what they come to find. ("These bonds are shackle free / wrapped in lust and lunacy")

AAAAAND "Collide" just popped up on shuffle. I think iTunes knew I was commenting to you. XD