Machine Hearts of Machine Men
Title: Machine Hearts of Machine Men
Pairing: Taeyeon/SNSD Member
Rating: PG
A/N: A quick and random write up.
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She doesn’t realize she’s fallen until she’s already on the ground.
The concrete knocks against her knees, and the contact jars her, bruises her, and vibrates from her bone all of the way through the rest of her body like it’s running in her blood flow.
Taeyeon doesn’t know what to do. But she gets up anyways, and keeps walking, pulling her black overcoat closer over the thin gaps in the cable knitting of her maroon sweater, feet clumsily edging forward and clapping against the ground with the loud quality of leather soles that only her money could buy.
But expensive leopard print oxfords aren’t what Taeyeon cares about, right now. Her money, her face, discernible for everyone to see, and her unsteady steps, are not on her mind, right now.
It’s still too cold in Seoul. But Taeyeon wants to strip everything she wears off of herself. She wants to tear at her own skin, and peel it all away like an onion, ripping the layers apart to find what she’s looking for.
Maybe then, she’d actually feel it when she falls again- like she doesn’t when she is actually on the ground again.
Taeyeon doesn’t get up, this time, and people look at her, as she expected them to. They whisper loudly, murmuring when they recognize her face, as she thought they would. But Taeyeon is so mentally beyond it-caring. She lets herself sink into the pavement, feeling as if she’s molding her body with the concrete; her deep honey locks spreading out like a nesting halo from under her head.
The indiscreet camera flashes do not faze her. And she remains on the ground, blank, void, maybe tired… But she doesn’t really know anymore, because what the problem was was that she could not feel anything anymore.
Taeyeon lies there for a long time, not realizing that she’s fallen asleep until she is woken up.
A frown greets her, when she opens her eyes. And seething, angry words spit out at her in rain droplets.
“You stupid, stupid, idiot.”
But the hands that help her up are gentle. They are warm, and hold her close, when they loop around the crick of her elbow and tie her down, forcing her to start walking, but also coaxing her to return where she reluctantly belongs.
The silence between them does not faze her. But Taeyeon does understand the meaning, when wide, heartbreaking eyes take a moment to glance at her.
‘You must keep going,’ she’s said, though she’ll never actually take the chance to say it aloud.
Taeyeon is reluctant, yet she agrees. And she understands.
She always understands her, and maybe that’s why she was the one who was sent to get her. Again. As she would the next time, and the next.
Because even if Taeyeon were to continue the rest of her life, empty and void.
She understands her.
‘Even if you lose everything, you must keep going.’
The End.
A/N:
I don't really know what the point of this piece is. My apologies for any of my mistakes.
Pairing: Taeyeon/SNSD Member
Rating: PG
A/N: A quick and random write up.
--------------------
She doesn’t realize she’s fallen until she’s already on the ground.
The concrete knocks against her knees, and the contact jars her, bruises her, and vibrates from her bone all of the way through the rest of her body like it’s running in her blood flow.
Taeyeon doesn’t know what to do. But she gets up anyways, and keeps walking, pulling her black overcoat closer over the thin gaps in the cable knitting of her maroon sweater, feet clumsily edging forward and clapping against the ground with the loud quality of leather soles that only her money could buy.
But expensive leopard print oxfords aren’t what Taeyeon cares about, right now. Her money, her face, discernible for everyone to see, and her unsteady steps, are not on her mind, right now.
It’s still too cold in Seoul. But Taeyeon wants to strip everything she wears off of herself. She wants to tear at her own skin, and peel it all away like an onion, ripping the layers apart to find what she’s looking for.
Maybe then, she’d actually feel it when she falls again- like she doesn’t when she is actually on the ground again.
Taeyeon doesn’t get up, this time, and people look at her, as she expected them to. They whisper loudly, murmuring when they recognize her face, as she thought they would. But Taeyeon is so mentally beyond it-caring. She lets herself sink into the pavement, feeling as if she’s molding her body with the concrete; her deep honey locks spreading out like a nesting halo from under her head.
The indiscreet camera flashes do not faze her. And she remains on the ground, blank, void, maybe tired… But she doesn’t really know anymore, because what the problem was was that she could not feel anything anymore.
Taeyeon lies there for a long time, not realizing that she’s fallen asleep until she is woken up.
A frown greets her, when she opens her eyes. And seething, angry words spit out at her in rain droplets.
“You stupid, stupid, idiot.”
But the hands that help her up are gentle. They are warm, and hold her close, when they loop around the crick of her elbow and tie her down, forcing her to start walking, but also coaxing her to return where she reluctantly belongs.
The silence between them does not faze her. But Taeyeon does understand the meaning, when wide, heartbreaking eyes take a moment to glance at her.
‘You must keep going,’ she’s said, though she’ll never actually take the chance to say it aloud.
Taeyeon is reluctant, yet she agrees. And she understands.
She always understands her, and maybe that’s why she was the one who was sent to get her. Again. As she would the next time, and the next.
Because even if Taeyeon were to continue the rest of her life, empty and void.
She understands her.
‘Even if you lose everything, you must keep going.’
The End.
A/N:
I don't really know what the point of this piece is. My apologies for any of my mistakes.