CHALLENGE 4: BIG BANG
*** one fic of 3133 words ***
*** one fanmix ***
Mission Impossible
Max was walking on the Glee set. The script said he had a scene with Chris today and he was looking forward to it. Scenes with Chris were always amazing to do. Chris just gave so much each time, it was great to be a part of that.
Some of the student cast members he passed were looking at him strangely. Now that he looked around, the set looked particularly realistic today. He had to remember to give props to the guys who made it all.
Seeing Chris at the end of the hallway, he went to greet him “Hey, Chris, already been through hair and make-up?” he asked, seeing that the other guy had his Kurt-outfit on already.
He wasn’t prepared for the chilling glare he received.
“Why the hell are you talking to me!? Leave me alone!”
Looking confused, Max runs his hand through his hair “Gosh, Chris, if I did something wrong, just say so and I’ll fix it.”
“I don’t know what game you’re playing here, Karofsky. But I can assure you that I’m not even in the least bit amused by it! I’ll say it one more time; leave me alone, I don’t want you near me!” he said icily, sticking his nose up in the air. “Now get out of my way; I need to go home.”
Concerned, Max moves closer and reaches for the other man’s forehead with his hand. “Are you feeling... okay? You didn’t bump your head on your way here, did you?”
The other boy shrieks and Max takes a few steps backwards, still as confused as before. Maybe he should call 911... Chris definitely wasn’t himself. Overworked, perhaps. Unfortunately, no one else was in the hallway at the moment.
Realising that Chris was yelling at him, he tried to tune in again to his words.
“- you have no right to antagonize me like this, you clueless, ignorant Neanderthal! “
That’s weird. Chris sounded just like...
“What the hell are you bitching about this time, Hummel!” came from further down the hallway. When Max turned around, he was stunned to find himself standing there. Well, not himself exactly... his character; David Karofsky, complete with matching scowl and Letterman jacket.
“Aah Max, there you are! I couldn’t find you anywhere and speaking of which, neither could I find Ryan!”
The three boys were shell-shocked when Chris Colfer stumbled upon the scene.
“You’ve got to be freaking kidding me.” Dave mumbled, staring in disbelief at TWO Kurts! Wasn’t having one mental tormenter enough, he thought angrily.
Chris rubbed his eyes as he took in the scene. “Wait... what... how can this be!” he exclaimed, looking at Kurt, Dave and Max.
Kurt opens his mouth, about to say something, but when Chris locks eyes with him, his mouth closes again and he faints. Max reaches for him before he hits the ground and holds him in his arms.
“I should have seen that coming...” Chris muttered, rolling his eyes. Trust Kurt Hummel to make everything even more dramatic than it already was.
“What the hell is happening here!” Dave yells angrily, clenching his fists. Max looks at him in disapproval and explains that he and Chris are actors. Instead of calming him, Dave gets even angrier. “That fucking fairy set you up to do this, didn’t he! I’m gonna kick his ass!” he yelled, glaring at the unconscious boy.
Chris had enough of the closeted teen’s paranoia. “First of all, look at him. Do you think he would faint if that were the case? I don’t think so, so shut your trap and calm down for God’s sake!”
Meanwhile, Kurt is finally coming to again and frowns at Max, making the man sigh.
“Look, don’t freak out, okay? I’m not the same as the Karofsky you know. I’m Max Adler.”
Those words calmed Kurt down considerably and he smiled up at him, making Dave glare at Max for getting something he wanted.
Chris rolls his eyes. Can Kurt be even more obvious? It was obviously going to be Finn Hudson all over again. Poor Max.
His confidence however, fails him a bit when Kurt starts berating him for his appearance.
“You may look like me, but you definitely have no style whatsoever. Look at your hair! What is this? There’s absolutely no model in it! Your clothes look like they come from target!” he exclaims, gesturing at Chris’ plain navy blue T-shirt and jeans. “Or worse... Walmart!” he continues shuddering.
“Never thought I would say this, but... even Rachel has better taste than you!”
Then something on Chris’ wrist caught his eyes. “Oh Gaga.... what is THAT!”
Max is amused by it all, especially when seeing Chris stunned into silence. Chris is a guy who has an answer or comment for everything, but it seems that - right now - the poor man just didn’t know what to say to the fashionista scolding him.
Yet, for Chris, enough was enough. He silenced Kurt by grabbing him by the shoulders. “Listen kid, newsflash; I’m 21, I don’t need to listen to a 17 year old who doesn’t even exist in my world. I like the way I dress, and instead of whining about something as inane as my outfit, you should focus on why the hell we’re in this situation. That is what defines you and me; I’m mature and you are clearly still immature.”
The fashionista glares at Chris, and Chris answers with an icy glare of his own. They look as if they’re about to jump each other. Max and Dave only share one look and know what to do. Dave holds Chris back and Max holds Kurt back. Max is having an easy job with that, considering that Kurt practically melted in his arms the minute he touched him.
“I don’t like the way he patronizes me. Older or not, I don’t need to let myself get insulted by that Kurt Hummel wannabe...” Kurt told Max haughtily.
Max sighed in response “I’m not saying he can insult you, but he’s right you know? What he wears doesn’t matter. He’s not you and there are far more important things to worry about right now.”
Kurt nodded at that “Fine... I guess you’re right.”
“Besides, Chris is an awesome guy, but even though he doesn’t show it; he’s just as freaked out by this as we all are. Something like that tends to create a lot of tension.”
The fashionista could certainly agree with that.
Dave wasn’t sure what to say to the man he was holding. ‘Fancy’ certainly wouldn’t suit him. And Hummel? He doubted that was the guy’s name too. And hell, he was way stronger than scrawny Kurt!
“Will you stop moving!”
“Fine, you can let me go now. I’m not going to attack him, don’t worry. How weird would it be to attack someone who looks just like you.”
Dave nodded once and released him. He looked at Kurt - uhm, other guy - sizing him up, making Chris smirk knowingly.
“Like what you see?”
Chris regretted saying that when Dave started to freak out on him.
“I swear, one word about it to anyone and-“
“And you’ll kill me. Yeah, yeah, I know. I heard it all before. Stop freaking out. Kurt doesn’t know a thing, and trust me; we’re not going to tell him. He’ll have to find out himself.”
Chris pointedly ignored the closeted teen’s mutterings about no one finding out anything.
“Max, I need to talk to you.” He says when joining the other duo again. Taking Max with him around the corner of the hallway, he turned towards him and started with “Kurt needs to get laid... seriously. He’s even worse of an ice queen than when I’m playing him!”
Blushing a bit at the blunt words, Max shrugs “He seems fine, but I feel bad for Dave. Still seems so unhappy.”
“That’s because the locker kiss, bullywhips and all that didn’t happen here yet.”
“You mean Kurt...”
“is clueless.” Chris answered the hanging sentence. “Here’s the thing. They need to help each other, and frankly, I want me some Russian ballerina.”
Max laughed “That’s impossible, man. At least on short term anyway. I can hear them arguing from here.”
Chris grinned. “I have a plan.”
Max wasn’t sure if he was going to like it, but when Chris was determined, there was no stopping him.
“What we’re going to do is...” Chris explained the entire plan, sure it would be a success, but Max looked doubtful.
“Jenn isn’t going to like that.”
“Jennifer would understand, Max. You’re an actor, you have to pretend to be someone else all the time. What’s one time more?”
There was no arguing with that.
Getting back to Dave and Kurt, Chris explains that they should split up, because there would be chaos if anyone saw all of them together. Dave goes with Chris and Kurt goes with Max each taking a spare key of the other’s house with them.
Kurt is more than happy to go with Max and immediately starts complimenting him on his outfit, saying it accented his lovely arms perfectly.
Chris however has decided to take Dave along on a shopping trip. He may not be as flamboyant as Kurt, but he still loved a good make-over. Dave was horrified when Chris told him about the make-over.
“No freaking way. People see me at some fancy shop with you, and I’m dead!”
“Oh come on, we’ll only be going to Target. You heard Kurt; I have no taste whatsoever. Luckily for you, I do know what Kurt likes to see on a man.”
Dave scowled “What should I care about whatever that little homo thinks about me!”
“I play Kurt, Dave, you kissed him in my world. I know you like him. It’s obvious. And don’t start with the killing thing again - or the asskicking - that gets old real fast.” Chris said, guiding Dave along with him.
Dave can’t help but ask. “What are you talking about?” and Chris explains everything that happened in the series up to the end of season 2.
It makes Dave silent for a while “That’s a shitload to take in... really screwed up.”
But Chris assures him that he won’t let it come to that.
“First thing is accepting yourself and believe it or not, but Kurt can help you with that. Only when you’ve done that, you’ll be able to get a good shot at him. Kurt doesn’t like hiding.”
So that’s why Dave agrees to let Chris take him to target and the hairdresser’s. First, they stop at Kurt’s house so that Chris can change into some other clothes. Kurt-approved clothes. Sure that he’s picked the outfit that Kurt would miss the less, he changes into it.
“You look exactly like Fancy right now. Only a bit older. It’s freaky, really, how something like this is even possible!”
“Is that a roundabout way of saying that I look bad in these clothes?”
“What? No! Totally not what I meant, dude. You... uhm, you look great. Like Fancy... all prance and elegance and stuff.”
Chris laughed “I get it, Dave, don’t fret. I was only messing with you. I’m good at that.”
“No shit...”
Dave is happy that Kurt’s dad isn’t home. He doesn’t know the man, but judging from what Chris had told him, he wasn’t very keen on meeting him.
Dave desperately wants to make up for what he did, and Chris was going to help him with it. He’d be the biggest idiot ever if he wasn’t going to take this chance. He even felt the urge to apologize for the messed up stuff he was going to pull in the future.
**
At the mall, Max is seriously regretting agreeing to Chris’ plan. Kurt has fallen for him... hard, and he’s certainly not afraid to show it. It doesn’t help that he has to pretend to be gay either. Kurt had voiced his interest in him several times already. Max had attempted to argue with their age difference, but Kurt waved all those protests away like they were only little details.
They were at the mall because Kurt had insisted on looking his very best, so he needed a new outfit. Max knew Kurt’s intentions, but stayed silent, not encouraging him in the least. Chris’ plan had better be worth it, he thought while watching Kurt twirl around in the outfit he’d picked out.
Max takes Kurt to Dave’s place, with the excuse that Dave’s parents were expecting him there. They were greeted by Dave’s father, Paul, and the man immediately took a liking to Kurt.
In Dave’s room, Kurt is shocked to see that there’s actually some depth to his bully. He’d have expected Dave’s room to be extremely messy, like a caveman’s hole, but it was actually really tidy, and he saw several books of novels he’d never have expected the jock to read. And the biggest shock of all were all the textbooks of advanced courses. He took the Calculus textbook and flicked through it.
“Karofsky’s a junior just like me... calculus is a senior course at William McKinley!”
“He’s really good at maths, and takes some other advanced courses as well. Thing is, Kurt, no one knows the real Dave Karofsky. He’s hiding away who he is, because he wants to fit in.”
“That doesn’t excuse him for being a jerk.” Kurt snapped, making Max chuckle.
“It doesn’t, but try to keep an open mind. You might like the person behind the bullying.”
“I doubt it.” Kurt sniffed, taking a look at Dave’s CD and DVD collection and was shocked to find a section which had the tag ‘Fancy’ on it.
“Isn’t that what he calls me? Why would he name a collection after me?” Kurt asked perplexed, looking at Max as if he could give him all the answers.
“You tell me. I’m not Dave, I just play him, I don’t know what’s going on in his mind.”
Kurt goes to the bathroom to change his outfit.
**
The two pairs meet up again at the bleachers, because no one is around there at this time of the day. Dave fumes as he sees Kurt’s lovestruck puppy behaviour. Who cares that it’s cute, that Max guy was getting the attention he wanted so badly!
Chris nudges him and Dave sighs before moving towards Kurt “I... know I’m not as fancy as Mr. Perfect over there,” he started, glaring a bit at the man who looked exactly the same as him, but was oh so different
“but... you know... I uhm got you these, kind of...” he said, revealing a bouquet of flowers, making Kurt’s eyes widen.
“Karofsky... Are you saying that you’re -“
“Yeah.” Dave interrupted. “I’m as queer as the rainbow flag stuck up your ass.”
Chris snorted in the background. There was something hilarious about Dave’s way of saying things.
Max rolled his eyes fondly. He should have known that Dave would say something like that.
Kurt, with his cheeks a flaming red, stuttered “I... I don’t know what to say. W-what do you expect me to say to THAT!”
“Dunno... I mean... hell, I wasn’t gonna let you know anything, but that dork over there,” he said, pointing at a smirking Chris “somehow knew everything I was gonna do in the future, and fuck, it sounded like hell for me, and for you, and he knows that I uhm kinda... like you, and said I had to do something about that.” Dave didn’t think that his cheeks could get any more red.
Kurt was standing there with his mouth agape. Karofsky and gay in one sentence was something Kurt’s mind was still trying to process, but the fact that the jock LIKED him! Talk about surprising!
“And you don’t have to say anything, you know. I mean, I did some fucked up shit; pushing you into lockers and all just so that you would look at me... and I guess I was also pissed because you were always happy and prancing around like being gay is the best freaking thing in the world. So... yeah... I wanna make up for everything, ‘s kinda the point of this. Cause I’m really sorry for what I did.”
Max smiled and nodded in approval. Dave handled that pretty well in his own way. Looking at Chris, he saw that the guy was practically sitting on the edge of his seat so to speak. He seemed also a tad annoyed that Kurt was still standing there gaping like a fish.
Still hesitant, Kurt took the flowers from Dave carefully and looked up at him sceptically.
“This isn’t some trick you’re trying to pull, right?”
Dave chuckled a bit “No trick, Fancy. And if it was, I bet those two would kick my ass.”
Kurt nodded, smiling at Max and Chris. Max winked at him and Kurt realised that he now had his answer for the CD and DVD collection mystery. That certainly explained why there were musicals in that section. It was actually kind of sweet, Kurt thought.
Dave shifted on his feet, extremely nervous to hear Kurt’s reaction. “So... we cool?”
“Yeah, we’re definitely cool now.”
Max and Chris shared a fist bump, and Chris chirped “Mission accomplished! Who knew that after watching Tom Cruise so many times in Mission Impossible, I’d have my own mission impossible some day!”
“Hey, you’re not the one who had to pretend to be gay!”
“Of course not; I am gay already, gives me the privilege to pass on any awkwardness.”
Kurt frowned at Max “You... aren’t gay?”
“Nope. Straight with girlfriend. Sorry, man. Besides, the way I acted was totally an out-of-the-closet-Karofsky, so... “
Dave looked surprised but shot a grateful look at Max nonetheless. He wasn’t ready yet to come ou, but he and Kurt were on good terms now, so that was pretty amazing already.
“Dude, you’re fading!” he exclaimed at Max, suddenly realizing that he could look through him.
Chris understood what was happening
“Seems that our work here is done. Be good boys, and Kurt; try to lose the attitude a bit.”
Max laughed as Dave said “No way, his bitchy attitude rocks!” and said his own goodbyes before they completely vanished.
**
Chris woke up in his bed. Disoriented, he looked around him.
“That’s... odd.” He murmured. “So it was only a dream.”
He didn’t really know why he was so disappointed.
On set, he said hello to his friends and smiled as he and Max had to come together for a scene.
“Here we go again. These scenes are always awesome.”
Max nodded, eager to be on set again. “Speaking about awesome, I’ve had the craziest dream last night!”_______________________________________________________________________________________________
Dave Karofsky fanmix
***
