hiatus, retreat or mental health holiday

[saeble]

It seems that INTJs of basically every stripe occasionally get their Hermit on and vanish into their cave/shell/castle and lock the door behind them

Comments

[suitablyemoname]

My trigger is being ignored. Not in the I NEED CONSTANT ATTENTION AND IF EVERYONE ISN'T ALWAYS LOOKING AT ME ALL THE TIME ALWAYS, I'M PICKING UP MY TOYS AND GOING HOME sense, but when I feel I'm saying something important--particularly if I'm in one of my "No, I know I'm right, so shut up and listen" moods--feeling like I'm being ignored sends me right over the edge. (Especially, as is sometimes the case, where I've been ignored by the same people in past and turned out to be spot-on.)

I'm getting better at letting go of things, but if it's something I consider important, the intensity doesn't really matter. As to duration, sometimes I just wince and shut up [no sense arguing with people who don't want to hear it], but I've quit a job over this, which is possibly a kind of permanent sulk. (And, of course, it turned out I was right all along. Grrrr.)

the answer is: I have no freaking clue.

[myriad_mirrors]

It's just a matter of time. Eventually I am overloaded by sensations, interactions with people, hurtful experiences. I think I'm just too sensitive (not just emotionally. sensation-wise also) and need time to process and recover. And then there is the fact that those isolated times afford me a chance to learn more. These cycles can last anywhere from hours to months, perhaps even years. Hard for me to say objectively. But I think it's usually a couple months. Well, all of my life is isolation, just in varying degrees.

[eryndil]

Really it's just when things get too much. Like too many annoying/frustrating/stressful situations all at once and continuing for weeks or months. I just want to close the door on all of it and have some time to myself.

I'm actually in that situation right now and I'd love to walk away and do the hermit act. Unfortunately, I can't so I'm slowly going crazy instead!

[bronxelf_ag001]

1) They're too numerous to list.

2) Yes. They have to come in multiples.

3)I've been in one, with very few forays out of it(Less than I'd say... 8 weeks total if you added it all up), since 2004.

[aegypius]

Whenever I feel like an asshat, or like I've revealed too much/people are getting too close. I can disappear for months during my reclusive phases, and if it's on an online basis, will often completely abandon one identity (all screen names, journals, e-mail accounts, even internet friends who haven't done anything wrong) and get new ones that no one knows about. It's harder to do this in "real-life," so I tend to just get avoidant instead (and may never go back to whatever it is that caused be to be avoidant to start with). I'm aware I'm probably more severe/unhealthy than most in this regard, though.

[undecidedmirror]

That interesting. I was once friends with a guy (another INTJ) who collected screen names and online identities. We became friends during a high-presence time and, about the time our friendship ended, he also quit using all the accounts he had accrued.

[aegypius]

Ahh, so I'm not the only INTJ who does this then. Interesting. Any time a friendship of mine ends, I feel a need to completely toss out my "former life" and start over-- presumably because if you make yourself someone new, you don't need to worry about what you screwed up in the past. Perhaps that's what he did.

[undecidedmirror]

I think so. He really didn't like talking about his life before, even minor things that really didn't matter.