Fic: Diploma 18/25
Title Diploma
Part 18/25
Author Internetname
Rating NC-17 (eventually)
Pairing John/Rodney
Summary Sentinel X/O: Rodney McKay and John Sheppard have figured out how to live the lives they want, and things should probably stay that way.
Warnings Slash
Word Count for Story So Far 29,094
Disclaimer Er...if they were mine they'd still be on TV.
Part One is Here
If he'd thought about it, Ronon Dex would rather have never seen his CO having sex. But everyone seemed to think it was going to help. And besides, he could honestly say he'd seen more of Sheppard in the shower. Not that there was much to see, considering that he had no ass whatsoever.
Rodney had better not lose that knife. It was his eighth favorite.
***
Waking up felt like his whole body was his dick, snug from head to toe inside a tight, warm body.
Waking up a bit more, he started to laugh. He'd never make a living at Hallmark.
There was vague protesting from his left shoulder, but when he turned to look, Rodney was smiling, all sleep-fuzzy and content.
"Oh, I like this," John said.
"Keeping me, then?"
"Absolutely."
"Good." Rodney closed his eyes and snuggled into his pillows.
"Hmmm."
"What?" Rodney kept his eyes shut.
"Who's going to move in with who? I mean, I know you have that prescription mattress, but you're farther away from the tower than I want to be."
Rodney was looking at him now, and frowning.
"We have to make sure the room is safe, and I don't want you to be too far from your labs, or course."
Gentle, nimble fingers traveled over the sheets and up his shoulder before coming to rest against his lips.
"Hold that thought," the Guide mumbled, then slid out of bed.
"Where are you going?"
"Shhh."
John frowned, aware he might even be pouting just a little. Rodney was quick, though, rooting through his duffel and coming back with his laptop.
"You're going to do work now?"
"Hush." Rodney slid back into bed and ended up flush against John's side, instantly filling him with contentment. "Good," the Guide whispered, opening the computer. "Now, this will only take a few minutes."
"What will?" There were a lot of interesting things in John's bed right now, but none of them had to do with the laptop.
Tinkly piano music played from the computer.
So, the moment has finally come. You've found your bond-mate and joined together for the rest of your lives, a man's voice crooned deeply.
"You gotta be kidding me."
"Shhh."
On screen, an evidently newly bonded male-male pair were in bed, tan silk sheets over their hips, gazing at each other with what John gathered was supposed to be passion.
Though you've never felt so good, so at peace, you're also filled with questions. How can you live with someone when you're so used to being alone? Can you make domestic decisions consciously, or will instinct rule your lives?
Where will you live? Who will pay the bills? Who will clean the bathroom?
"Rodney, please, for the love of God..."
"I'll blow you when it's done."
It's vital to remember that you have never in your life been as vulnerable as now.
The men onscreen were having some sort of argument. One fell sobbing into a chair while the other stomped out and slammed the door, only to return in a few seconds, pleading forgiveness.
Your soul is now tied to another. It's okay to be afraid. And when we're afraid, it's only natural to try to micromanage everything in your life. It gives you a sense of control.
"I'm not sure even a blowjob is worth this."
"Think about how strong my tongue has to be to talk as fast as I do."
The men were now dressed in casual clothes, holding each other as they sat on a porch swing, gazing up at the stars.
But that control is false. You are at the mercy of your bond-made, and you always will be. The best way to make it through the first days of a bond is to remember that your bond-made is also at your mercy, as deeply and completely as you. That is the only way bonds are formed, the only way they can be formed.
"I trust you, Rodney."
"It's not a matter of trust."
It is true that every decision you now make, for the rest of your life, will involve another person. But it also true that not every decision will actually interest him. Your new deodorant? He'll care because it will change the way you smell. You decide you want to buy a house closer to work? He may not care at all, because it makes you happy.
Do not attempt to anticipate your bond-mate's wishes regarding your needs at this time. That sort of understanding of the re-echo of your bond comes with years of practice. Only concern yourself with accepting the happiness so new to your life. Allow yourself this joy.
The male couple was back in bed, staring at one another again in sugary bliss.
See? It's not so bad."
"Rodney, my balls have curdled."
You do not believe it now, but you are allowed to be this happy. And your happiness will make the people you love happier. Each of you is the key to the other's person's joy.
Relax. Enjoy what you have earned as Sentinel and Guide.
The video came to an end with some credits and more tinkly music.
"That was pretty bad, Rodney."
"You feel better. Admit it."
"No."
"What about if I do this?"
"Uhhh."
"See? I'm not worrying about whether my attempt to make you happy is making us happy, or whatever. I just really like the way this feels."
"More."
"More?"
"Harder. Shit, Rodney."
"So articulate. Come on, order me to do it better. No, don't order. Ask, ask... because I'm your friend. You can ask, and it makes me happy."
"You have such warm hands."
"I'll always be warm for you, John."
"Ngh. Nothing's always warm."
"I'm not a thing. I'm the Guide."
"Guide. Yes. Please, please. I need more."
"I know exactly what you need. Look at you, all spread out, trim muscles everywhere, lines going down from your stomach to your hips. You're so hairy. There's sweat on your face. Sweat pooling on your neck. God, your neck."
"There! Shit! Oh, fuck!
"Oh, my God. I see the energy there. I see can see how it channels into the rest of your body. I can see the nerves in pattern on a screen!"
"In me."
"I can't. I don't have -"
"In my pocket. The pants on the floor."
Again, he watched Rodney slide from the bed, and, just as quickly as before, he was back, expression intense.
"I just...need."
"I know, John. It's okay."
Rodney's hair was thinning. It was soft under his fingers, fine and just slightly tending to curl. The warmth around him intensified all over, then slithered into a specific site.
"God."
He felt Rodney smile around him and spread himself out wider. A brief touch at his center, then another, then pressure, then warmth inside, and a gentle stroke.
"Fuck!"
A gun to his head couldn't have kept him from coming. His whole body got in on the act, and he might have lost it completely for a minute there when he felt Rodney swallow.
Vaguely, he reached down, but found his Guide was wet.
"I've never done that before," Rodney mumbled as he slid up against John's side where he belonged.
John snorted.
"No, I mean I've never come from making someone else come before. It was like I felt you all around me."
John searched for something clever, or at least something coherent to say. But Rodney started making those snore-snuffle noises, so he just went to sleep.
***
Part 19 is Here