Change (1/3) ; Yoochun/Changmin, Junsu/Changmin
Written for dbsk_bigbang, and originally posted here ♥ also, i must thank cmere again for helping me to beta this! :)
Title: Change (Part 1 of 3)
Rating: R
Fandom: Dong Bang Shin Ki
Pairing(s): Yoochun/Changmin, Junsu/Changmin, Yunho/Jaejoong
Word count: 11 234
Disclaimer: The boys do not belong to me. This is also nothing but pure fiction.
Summary: One night spent in a 24/7 diner marks new beginnings for Changmin. The appearances of Yoochun, Jaejoong, Yunho and Junsu change Changmin's life of mundane normalcy as he finds himself rooted into the heart of a love triangle, and learning about what love really is.
Prologue
Changmin sits in a 24-hour diner, half a cup of coffee in front of him, stagnant and cold.
It is nearly midnight. The roads outside are still crowded, but Changmin knows that in an hour or so, emptiness will settle in like a chilly breeze, sweeping through the streets.
Changmin is not the only customer in the diner. Two tables away, there is a young man, probably around Changmin's age, bent over his plate, shovelling food into his mouth at top speed.
Changmin stares down at his coffee and wonders if he should order something else, even though he isn't hungry at all.
Another young man occupies another corner of the restaurant - slender and pale-skinned. His collarbones stick out from his body and the black shirt he is wearing clings to his frame. He is staring intently at his cellphone, fingers moving rapidly across the keypad. His food lies half-eaten in front of him, a greasy mess of scrambled eggs and sausages.
Looking at the oily plate, Changmin promptly decides against ordering something else. He props his feet up on the seat across from him, slouching down in his seat and opening the book he has brought with him.
He is not a big lover of books. Changmin reads because time passes faster when he does, and there is no better alternative, especially when it is barely midnight, and there are many hours to have to crawl past before morning comes. He has a part-time job at the library, which also means that he has convenient access to many books, and Changmin is someone who takes advantage of whatever privileges he is offered.
Changmin is waiting for the night to pass - but it is not because Changmin has nowhere to stay for the night. He has a house to go home to. He lives by himself in a small apartment about a fifteen minute walk away, but tonight, he does not feel like going home. Sitting here in the diner, he can pretend that he is not just a common university student, leading a boring lonely life. He can pretend that he has run away from home (part of it is true, he tells himself, he is so far away from home), or he is waiting for someone (even though there is no one for him to meet). He can pretend to be so many things.
He looks up from his reading when he hears the door swing open and shut. A group of girls walks in - young girls, probably just out of high school, wearing short skirts and high heels, giggling as they look through the menu.
Youthfulness clings cloyingly to their skin like sweet perfume. They make a lot of noise, and Changmin watches them from behind his book with mild irritation. They order their drinks, and leave, silence descending over the restaurant once more.
Silence dominates the place, but once in a while, there are the little sounds - the noise of plates clanging together from the kitchen, the soft click of cutlery against ceramic as the young man two tables away gobbles his food down enthusiastically, and the whisper of paper as Changmin turns a page.
The next time Changmin looks up, it is already past twelve. The date has changed without Changmin realising. He blinks, puts his book aside and drains the rest of his coffee. Two tables away, the young man has three empty plates in front of him, and he is peering into his wallet with a mildly distressed look on his face.
At the other corner, the young man who had been furiously typing on his phone is still staring at the phone, but he is no longer typing. He looks like he is waiting for a reply. His feet under the table are tapping out an erratic rhythm as he stares at the empty air in front of him, as though he is looking at something Changmin cannot see.
Someone slides into the seat across from him. Startled, Changmin jerks his head around, wide-eyed.
The young man from two tables away. "Hi," he says with an uncomfortable smile.
Changmin stares at him blankly. He cannot recall ever seeing this young man anywhere before - he is certain that they are strangers.
"Sorry for intruding," the young man says awkwardly. "But can you possibly lend me some money?"
Changmin glances over at the other table, at the three empty plates, and then back at the young man. "Why?"
"I ordered too much," the young man answers sheepishly. "I only have enough to pay for one plate." He holds out his fist and shows Changmin the money that he is clutching, a few crumpled bills and a small hill of coins.
Changmin thinks about the request for a moment. The young man looks honest enough; in addition, he is reasonably well-dressed and there is an expectant look on his face. Grudgingly, Changmin reaches into his pocket and slides some money across the table.
"I'll definitely return this to you," the young man says firmly, taking the money from Changmin. "I promise."
"I'll be here until morning," Changmin says, cutting him off.
The young man pauses. "I'll come back here by eight in the morning and return you the money," he says politely, taking Changmin's hint. "Definitely," he adds, for good measure, before standing up and walking to the counter.
Changmin returns to his book, and by the time he looks up, the young man is gone. Other than the man with his cellphone, he is the only customer in the restaurant. The man with the cellphone is still waiting for his reply.
Eventually, Changmin does fall asleep, slumped on the table, an arm tucked under his face. When he wakes, the clock reads six in the morning.
He sits up and looks around. He is finally the only one left.
He stands up, stretches and orders another coffee.
Two refills and a plate of scrambled eggs and toast later, it is eight-forty, and the young man who owes Changmin money is nowhere to be seen. Changmin stares balefully into the bottom of his cup, glances at his watch, and then at the door.
He pours what's left in his cup onto the empty plate, watches the brown liquid drip onto the ceramic, mixing with oily grease. He sets the cup back on the table and stands up, pays for his food and walks out, feeling cheated and resigned.
The people around him, even the ones who barely know him, always end up never coming back.
.ONE
The diner was the beginning - the insignificant flap of a butterfly’s wings that would eventually lead to a hurricane responsible for turning Changmin’s life upside down.
After leaving the diner, Changmin goes home, takes a shower and goes for a lecture at his university in the afternoon. He sits through lectures, only half-listening, his mind always wandering somewhere else where his body cannot follow.
In the evening, Changmin meets Yoochun.
The café that Changmin frequents for quick simple meals is uncommonly crowded, and Changmin ends up sharing a table with Yoochun. They end up chatting through the meal, and after dinner, they wander to the park and find a patch of grass to sit on. Yoochun has a way of talking that draws Changmin in, has him hanging onto every word. He also happens to be one of the rare people that Changmin actually wants to talk to, wants to open up to.
Yoochun is an aspiring song-writer who makes a living by playing the piano in various high-class restaurants and lounge bars. Yoochun carries an air of mystery around him that Changmin cannot help but be drawn to.
"Listen to this," Yoochun urges, untangling his earphones and thrusting one towards Changmin earnestly. "It's only halfway done," he says. "But I have a feeling this one is going to turn out great." There's a light in his eyes that makes Changmin want to smile along with him.
Changmin cocks his head and listens intently to the recording of Yoochun's work-in-progress. The melody is beautiful - Yoochun is undeniably talented, but the song sounds unpolished and fragmented. It lacks the professional finish that it needs for it to be able to sell. Still, there is something arresting about Yoochun's songs - it leaves something lingering in your heart. Changmin has a feeling that Yoochun will be very successful one day. And he can’t help but think he wants to be around to see that day - can’t help but think that he wants to be by Yoochun’s side, to witness the process.
"It's difficult," Yoochun says, leaning backwards and tilting his face towards the sky, where the sun is setting, leaving behind a rosy blush. "Trying to sell a song. I never thought it'd be so hard."
There is a long silence, and Changmin just keeps looking at Yoochun, completely captivated.
Suddenly, Yoochun turns around and their eyes meet. Changmin’s heart stutters like a song skipping on a broken record player, stuck on one high climatic note that keeps replaying over and over again.
"You know something?" Yoochun says, carefully looping his earphones around his music player. "I think we were meant to meet. I can feel it."
And then Yoochun smiles - his smile reminds Changmin of the bright glinting edge of a knife (cutting a clean swath through Changmin’s heart). "I want to take you somewhere," Yoochun says, and as though they have known each other all their lives, he grabs hold of Changmin’s hand and pulls him to his feet.
"I work here, on weekends," Yoochun explains, pushing the door open. The bar Yoochun has brought him to is not big or anything fancy, but it is relatively packed. Changmin loves it. It is one of those rare places where he does not feel out of place. "On weekdays, my friend sings instead. You should hear him sing, his voice is out of this world," Yoochun says, punctuating the claim with an enthusiastic thumbs-up and a grin.
Changmin raises an eyebrow. "Really?" He lets his suspicion come through in his voice.
Yoochun glances over at the small stage, where a microphone stand and a keyboard have been set up. "He’ll be out soon." He keeps a firm hold on Changmin's wrist as he weaves through the crowd, towards the bar. "Let's get drinks first," he says, and the smile on his face makes it obvious that Yoochun is a big fan of alcohol.
Changmin is ordering his drink when he hears someone playing a few chords experimentally on the keyboard. Yoochun nudges him, and Changmin spins around on the stool until he's facing the small stage, where someone starts to play the beginnings of a song he has never heard before.
He blinks several times, tilts his head to the side and tries as hard as he can to recall where he has seen this man before.
The man playing the keyboard is thin, and has big electrifying eyes. And then he starts to sing. In that moment, Changmin understands what Yoochun means.
It is magical. Changmin cannot tear his eyes away. His voice is soothing and Changmin thinks that he can fall asleep listening to this, and dream the sweetest dreams - except the question of where have I seen him before nags at him like an itch, keeping him from fully enjoying the performance.
It only hits him when the second song ends, and the man takes his cellphone out of his pocket to check for messages. The phone.
The diner.
As though the man senses Changmin's little epiphany, he looks up and across the room, right at Changmin, and his gaze slides sideways to settle on Yoochun. He slides the cellphone back into his pocket and makes his way through the crowd, stopping in front of the both of them.
"Yoochun," he says, and they exchange smiles. Before Yoochun can say anything, the man turns to Changmin and says, "I've seen you before."
His smile is as electrifying as his eyes are.
"I know," Changmin answers.
"You know him?" Yoochun asks, looking from Changmin to his friend and then back again, surprised.
"We've seen each other before, but we don't know each other," Yoochun's friend answers. He introduces himself, holding out a hand. "I'm Jaejoong," he says. "I work here, as you can tell."
"I'm Changmin." Changmin returns the favour, and shakes the offered hand. "Actually, I only just met Yoochun today - "
"Regardless," Yoochun interrupts him. "Even though we just met, I have a feeling I already know you well enough to foresee that you and Jaejoong will get along superbly."
"Yoochun and I, we've known each other for a long time," Jaejoong says.
"Not that long, actually," Yoochun adds. "Just about two years."
"Two years is a long time," Jaejoong says, in all seriousness.
Changmin doesn't quite know how to react, but suddenly he understands what Yoochun means when he said that they were meant to meet. I've been waiting for this, Changmin thinks, until now.
Somehow along the way, Jaejoong takes it upon himself to watch out for Changmin, as though Changmin has become his responsibility. Yoochun makes fun of Changmin; you bring out his maternal instincts, he says and Changmin pretends to complain about it but he has never had someone look after him like this, and it secretly delights him.
"There's someone I want you to meet," Jaejoong says one day, out of the blue. His cheeks are pink and he shifts his weight from one leg to the other, like a nervous schoolboy. "He's someone special," he says and waits for a reaction.
Changmin blinks. "Okay," he says, having no idea why Jaejoong is behaving strangely. Jaejoong brings him to a cosy Japanese restaurant that Changmin has never been to, and the entire time, Jaejoong fidgets in his chair and chatters about mindless things.
"Who is it you want me to meet?" Changmin asks curiously, after sitting through ten minutes of Jaejoong’s fidgeting.
"He's a friend," Jaejoong says, but the flush on his face tells Changmin otherwise.
Yunho is the most handsome man Changmin has ever seen. When he walks into the restaurant, he carries a presence around him that is hard not to notice. He is tall, not as tall as Changmin, but still tall enough tower over everyone else.
Jaejoong smiles so hard when Yunho sits down Changmin cannot help but wonder if the corners of his lips are going to stretch all the way to his ears.
"This is Yunho," Jaejoong tells Changmin. "Yunho, this is Changmin."
"I've heard about you," Yunho says with a warm smile.
Changmin's heart hammers in his chest and he is certain that if he met Yunho somewhere else, and not as Jaejoong's significant other, he would have fallen. Just like that.
There is a fire in Jaejoong's eyes and a glow on his face that makes Changmin want to fall in love, just to see if he wears the head-over-heels look as well as Jaejoong does.
Changmin recognizes the sour taste that wells up in the back of his throat as a mix of envy and jealousy, and swallows hard to push the feelings away.
Over lunch, the three of them make small talk.
Yunho is a choreographer, and when he names a major entertainment agency he works for, Changmin's jaw drops. "You must be really good," Changmin says, impressed.
Yunho laughs in embarrassment and opens his mouth to reply, but is quickly interrupted by Jaejoong, who grabs onto his arm, eyes suddenly two times wider.
"Yunho," Jaejoong says urgently. "The tickets. You promised. Please don't tell me you forgot." Seeing the confused look on Changmin's face, Jaejoong turns to face him. "There's this amazing singer who belongs to the same company and I begged Yunho to use his connections to get tickets to his concert. He's really, really good. I've heard him sing before, and trust me, he's amazing."
Grinning, Yunho produces a pair of tickets from his pocket and Jaejoong claps his hands together gleefully in child-like manner.
"Take Changmin with you," Yunho says, surrendering the tickets to a beaming Jaejoong. “I’ll be busy.”
Changmin wants to decline. Crowded places do not agree with him, and being in a concert hall packed with screaming fans is not how Changmin wants to spend a Friday night.
"Ask Yoochun instead," Changmin suggests, but Jaejoong ignores him and announces loudly that this Friday night, he is taking Changmin out.
When Yoochun calls Changmin after lunch, and asks Changmin if he is free on Friday night to watch a movie, Jaejoong snatches the phone and informs Yoochun loudly that Changmin already has somewhere to be.
"You're not going to regret it," Jaejoong tells Changmin after hanging up on a bemused Yoochun. "I promise."
Changmin is not so certain, but Jaejoong looks so happy and excited that Changmin does not have the heart to decline, and he resigns himself to a painful Friday night.
Changmin yawns as the light floods the stage. The girl in front of him throws her hands into the air, shrieking wildly, and Changmin has to tilt his head to the side to be able to see the stage. He is sure that in five minutes, his neck is going to start aching and his eardrums will have popped.
"He's really good," Jaejoong tells Changmin earnestly, the sixth time since they sat down.
Changmin wonders what he is doing in this crowded place, packed with adoring fangirls, on a Friday night (when he could have been somewhere else - like watching a movie with Yoochun), waiting for some pretty boy to come on stage and sing. Next to him Jaejoong throws him an exasperated look.
"Stop making that miserable face," Jaejoong says.
"I'm not," Changmin says sullenly, the miserable look not budging from his face at all.
Jaejoong looks like he has a good retort ready when music starts playing. Distracted, Jaejoong looks away and promptly sucks in a breath dramatically. "Oh my God, he's here, he's here - " Jaejoong elbows Changmin hard to get his attention and points violently towards the stage.
Changmin turns back to stare at the stage and squints at the small figure walking to the centre. He gives up and glances at the large screen instead. He does a double-take, staring at the face on the bright screen.
The guy from the diner.
Who took his money, promised to come back in the morning to return it and didn't.
Changmin had given up his Friday night to watch him? He swears loudly, earning himself a disapproving look from Jaejoong.
The idiot from diner starts to sing and Changmin sits back to glare at the screen, resigned to the fact that he is stuck here for the rest of the night.
After two and half songs, Changmin is forced to admit that the idiot is actually good. His singing tugs at heartstrings, and next to him, Jaejoong has his eyes closed, swaying to the music. That idiot's pitch never falls, and Changmin thinks that this is the most beautiful thing he has heard in ages.
Still, he decides, crossing his arms, great singing does not excuse anyone from borrowing money and not returning it. The thought slips from his grasp, as that idiot hits a note that leaves Changmin breathless and when he can finally breathe normally again, Changmin realises that somehow, within that short span of time, he has lost his heart.
"You're insane," Jaejoong says, shouting after Changmin, who is determinedly walking towards the stage.
"I need to see that idiot," Changmin shouts back.
"He has a name, his name is Kim Junsu," Changmin hears Jaejoong saying, sounding exasperated. "And you're out of your mind! He's not going to see you, for heaven's sake - "
Changmin storms around, looking for some kind of door that leads backstage. He spies a door that has a notice that says STAFF ONLY, and yanks it open.
"You're not allowed in here," a member of staff tells Jaejoong as he follows Changmin through the door.
"I know," Jaejoong snarls at him. "Tell that maniac in front of me that!" Jaejoong shoves the fellow out of the way and races after Changmin. Jaejoong manages three steps and then someone grabs him and starts to haul him out of the place forcefully.
"Shim Changmin," Jaejoong shrieks.
Changmin turns around to see Jaejoong being thrown out, looking enraged, and he winces. Jaejoong is probably swearing about how he is never going to take Changmin anywhere ever again.
He taps a random staff member on the shoulder and flashes him a polite smile. "Sorry, do you know where I might find Kim Junsu?"
"Who are you?" the man says, startled, giving Changmin a wary once-over.
"Why don't you just tell me where he is?" Changmin suggests brightly, smiling even more widely.
As it turns out, the man does not need to tell Changmin anything, because two seconds later, Changmin spots Kim Junsu walking down the corridor, towelling his hair dry and laughing loudly. Changmin thinks that Kim Junsu will not be looking so happy very soon, considering the fact that Changmin is in a foul mood and wants to loop that towel around the idiot’s neck and yank.
Changmin marches up to him and feels accomplished when recognition flashes across Kim Junsu’s face.
"Hi," Changmin says, wiping any trace of a smile off his face.
"It's you!" Kim Junsu says, and breaks into a massive grin. "You came to watch me perform?"
"Yes, but only because I had nothing else to do," Changmin answers calmly.
The smile on Kim Junsu's face falters. "Right," he says after a pause.
"You didn't come back in the morning." Changmin decides to get straight to the point.
The smile vanishes completely and Kim Junsu looks guilty. "Look, I can explain," he starts. "And I'll definitely return the money to you. I can even return it now - wait -" He thrusts his hands into his pockets, and fumbles with his wallet.
"It wasn't a lot of money," Changmin says, getting angrier by the second. "I'd have forgotten about it if I didn't see you today. I'd have treated it as an act of charity - maybe you really needed the money. Maybe you were really hard up for cash. I would have forgotten about it, but today, I'm dragged here by my friend to watch some next big thing and it's you - "
"I said I can explain," Kim Junsu interrupts, visibly flustered. He pushes money into Changmin's hands - double the amount that Changmin had lent him. "I'm returning you double, okay, I'm really sorry about not going back in the morning - "
Changmin loosens his grip, lets the money flutter onto the floor. “I don't need your charity," Changmin says, his face burning with heat.
"At least take the money I owe you," Kim Junsu says, looking twice as embarrassed. "I'm really sorry."
"Tell me something," Changmin says. "Did you only recall this when I walked up to you just now?"
Kim Junsu opens and closes his mouth. He seems to be having some sort of internal battle with himself, but after a few seconds, he lowers his head guiltily in an unmistakeable nod.
"You're unbelievable," Changmin says in disgust, turns around, and walks out. He knows that he's overreacting. He knows that he is being unreasonable. People make mistakes, people forget things, and Changmin is a forgiving person. Yet, somehow, Changmin can't let this go.
He can't.
Maybe it is because it hurts. It hurts to know that Kim Junsu (who took Changmin's emotions on a roller-coaster ride, whose performance Changmin wants to watch, over and over again) found it so easy to forget about Changmin, when Changmin -
Changmin will never forget him.
Continue to Part 2
MASTERLIST OF FICS HERE
Title: Change (Part 1 of 3)
Rating: R
Fandom: Dong Bang Shin Ki
Pairing(s): Yoochun/Changmin, Junsu/Changmin, Yunho/Jaejoong
Word count: 11 234
Disclaimer: The boys do not belong to me. This is also nothing but pure fiction.
Summary: One night spent in a 24/7 diner marks new beginnings for Changmin. The appearances of Yoochun, Jaejoong, Yunho and Junsu change Changmin's life of mundane normalcy as he finds himself rooted into the heart of a love triangle, and learning about what love really is.
Prologue
Changmin sits in a 24-hour diner, half a cup of coffee in front of him, stagnant and cold.
It is nearly midnight. The roads outside are still crowded, but Changmin knows that in an hour or so, emptiness will settle in like a chilly breeze, sweeping through the streets.
Changmin is not the only customer in the diner. Two tables away, there is a young man, probably around Changmin's age, bent over his plate, shovelling food into his mouth at top speed.
Changmin stares down at his coffee and wonders if he should order something else, even though he isn't hungry at all.
Another young man occupies another corner of the restaurant - slender and pale-skinned. His collarbones stick out from his body and the black shirt he is wearing clings to his frame. He is staring intently at his cellphone, fingers moving rapidly across the keypad. His food lies half-eaten in front of him, a greasy mess of scrambled eggs and sausages.
Looking at the oily plate, Changmin promptly decides against ordering something else. He props his feet up on the seat across from him, slouching down in his seat and opening the book he has brought with him.
He is not a big lover of books. Changmin reads because time passes faster when he does, and there is no better alternative, especially when it is barely midnight, and there are many hours to have to crawl past before morning comes. He has a part-time job at the library, which also means that he has convenient access to many books, and Changmin is someone who takes advantage of whatever privileges he is offered.
Changmin is waiting for the night to pass - but it is not because Changmin has nowhere to stay for the night. He has a house to go home to. He lives by himself in a small apartment about a fifteen minute walk away, but tonight, he does not feel like going home. Sitting here in the diner, he can pretend that he is not just a common university student, leading a boring lonely life. He can pretend that he has run away from home (part of it is true, he tells himself, he is so far away from home), or he is waiting for someone (even though there is no one for him to meet). He can pretend to be so many things.
He looks up from his reading when he hears the door swing open and shut. A group of girls walks in - young girls, probably just out of high school, wearing short skirts and high heels, giggling as they look through the menu.
Youthfulness clings cloyingly to their skin like sweet perfume. They make a lot of noise, and Changmin watches them from behind his book with mild irritation. They order their drinks, and leave, silence descending over the restaurant once more.
Silence dominates the place, but once in a while, there are the little sounds - the noise of plates clanging together from the kitchen, the soft click of cutlery against ceramic as the young man two tables away gobbles his food down enthusiastically, and the whisper of paper as Changmin turns a page.
The next time Changmin looks up, it is already past twelve. The date has changed without Changmin realising. He blinks, puts his book aside and drains the rest of his coffee. Two tables away, the young man has three empty plates in front of him, and he is peering into his wallet with a mildly distressed look on his face.
At the other corner, the young man who had been furiously typing on his phone is still staring at the phone, but he is no longer typing. He looks like he is waiting for a reply. His feet under the table are tapping out an erratic rhythm as he stares at the empty air in front of him, as though he is looking at something Changmin cannot see.
Someone slides into the seat across from him. Startled, Changmin jerks his head around, wide-eyed.
The young man from two tables away. "Hi," he says with an uncomfortable smile.
Changmin stares at him blankly. He cannot recall ever seeing this young man anywhere before - he is certain that they are strangers.
"Sorry for intruding," the young man says awkwardly. "But can you possibly lend me some money?"
Changmin glances over at the other table, at the three empty plates, and then back at the young man. "Why?"
"I ordered too much," the young man answers sheepishly. "I only have enough to pay for one plate." He holds out his fist and shows Changmin the money that he is clutching, a few crumpled bills and a small hill of coins.
Changmin thinks about the request for a moment. The young man looks honest enough; in addition, he is reasonably well-dressed and there is an expectant look on his face. Grudgingly, Changmin reaches into his pocket and slides some money across the table.
"I'll definitely return this to you," the young man says firmly, taking the money from Changmin. "I promise."
"I'll be here until morning," Changmin says, cutting him off.
The young man pauses. "I'll come back here by eight in the morning and return you the money," he says politely, taking Changmin's hint. "Definitely," he adds, for good measure, before standing up and walking to the counter.
Changmin returns to his book, and by the time he looks up, the young man is gone. Other than the man with his cellphone, he is the only customer in the restaurant. The man with the cellphone is still waiting for his reply.
Eventually, Changmin does fall asleep, slumped on the table, an arm tucked under his face. When he wakes, the clock reads six in the morning.
He sits up and looks around. He is finally the only one left.
He stands up, stretches and orders another coffee.
Two refills and a plate of scrambled eggs and toast later, it is eight-forty, and the young man who owes Changmin money is nowhere to be seen. Changmin stares balefully into the bottom of his cup, glances at his watch, and then at the door.
He pours what's left in his cup onto the empty plate, watches the brown liquid drip onto the ceramic, mixing with oily grease. He sets the cup back on the table and stands up, pays for his food and walks out, feeling cheated and resigned.
The people around him, even the ones who barely know him, always end up never coming back.
.ONE
The diner was the beginning - the insignificant flap of a butterfly’s wings that would eventually lead to a hurricane responsible for turning Changmin’s life upside down.
After leaving the diner, Changmin goes home, takes a shower and goes for a lecture at his university in the afternoon. He sits through lectures, only half-listening, his mind always wandering somewhere else where his body cannot follow.
In the evening, Changmin meets Yoochun.
The café that Changmin frequents for quick simple meals is uncommonly crowded, and Changmin ends up sharing a table with Yoochun. They end up chatting through the meal, and after dinner, they wander to the park and find a patch of grass to sit on. Yoochun has a way of talking that draws Changmin in, has him hanging onto every word. He also happens to be one of the rare people that Changmin actually wants to talk to, wants to open up to.
Yoochun is an aspiring song-writer who makes a living by playing the piano in various high-class restaurants and lounge bars. Yoochun carries an air of mystery around him that Changmin cannot help but be drawn to.
"Listen to this," Yoochun urges, untangling his earphones and thrusting one towards Changmin earnestly. "It's only halfway done," he says. "But I have a feeling this one is going to turn out great." There's a light in his eyes that makes Changmin want to smile along with him.
Changmin cocks his head and listens intently to the recording of Yoochun's work-in-progress. The melody is beautiful - Yoochun is undeniably talented, but the song sounds unpolished and fragmented. It lacks the professional finish that it needs for it to be able to sell. Still, there is something arresting about Yoochun's songs - it leaves something lingering in your heart. Changmin has a feeling that Yoochun will be very successful one day. And he can’t help but think he wants to be around to see that day - can’t help but think that he wants to be by Yoochun’s side, to witness the process.
"It's difficult," Yoochun says, leaning backwards and tilting his face towards the sky, where the sun is setting, leaving behind a rosy blush. "Trying to sell a song. I never thought it'd be so hard."
There is a long silence, and Changmin just keeps looking at Yoochun, completely captivated.
Suddenly, Yoochun turns around and their eyes meet. Changmin’s heart stutters like a song skipping on a broken record player, stuck on one high climatic note that keeps replaying over and over again.
"You know something?" Yoochun says, carefully looping his earphones around his music player. "I think we were meant to meet. I can feel it."
And then Yoochun smiles - his smile reminds Changmin of the bright glinting edge of a knife (cutting a clean swath through Changmin’s heart). "I want to take you somewhere," Yoochun says, and as though they have known each other all their lives, he grabs hold of Changmin’s hand and pulls him to his feet.
"I work here, on weekends," Yoochun explains, pushing the door open. The bar Yoochun has brought him to is not big or anything fancy, but it is relatively packed. Changmin loves it. It is one of those rare places where he does not feel out of place. "On weekdays, my friend sings instead. You should hear him sing, his voice is out of this world," Yoochun says, punctuating the claim with an enthusiastic thumbs-up and a grin.
Changmin raises an eyebrow. "Really?" He lets his suspicion come through in his voice.
Yoochun glances over at the small stage, where a microphone stand and a keyboard have been set up. "He’ll be out soon." He keeps a firm hold on Changmin's wrist as he weaves through the crowd, towards the bar. "Let's get drinks first," he says, and the smile on his face makes it obvious that Yoochun is a big fan of alcohol.
Changmin is ordering his drink when he hears someone playing a few chords experimentally on the keyboard. Yoochun nudges him, and Changmin spins around on the stool until he's facing the small stage, where someone starts to play the beginnings of a song he has never heard before.
He blinks several times, tilts his head to the side and tries as hard as he can to recall where he has seen this man before.
The man playing the keyboard is thin, and has big electrifying eyes. And then he starts to sing. In that moment, Changmin understands what Yoochun means.
It is magical. Changmin cannot tear his eyes away. His voice is soothing and Changmin thinks that he can fall asleep listening to this, and dream the sweetest dreams - except the question of where have I seen him before nags at him like an itch, keeping him from fully enjoying the performance.
It only hits him when the second song ends, and the man takes his cellphone out of his pocket to check for messages. The phone.
The diner.
As though the man senses Changmin's little epiphany, he looks up and across the room, right at Changmin, and his gaze slides sideways to settle on Yoochun. He slides the cellphone back into his pocket and makes his way through the crowd, stopping in front of the both of them.
"Yoochun," he says, and they exchange smiles. Before Yoochun can say anything, the man turns to Changmin and says, "I've seen you before."
His smile is as electrifying as his eyes are.
"I know," Changmin answers.
"You know him?" Yoochun asks, looking from Changmin to his friend and then back again, surprised.
"We've seen each other before, but we don't know each other," Yoochun's friend answers. He introduces himself, holding out a hand. "I'm Jaejoong," he says. "I work here, as you can tell."
"I'm Changmin." Changmin returns the favour, and shakes the offered hand. "Actually, I only just met Yoochun today - "
"Regardless," Yoochun interrupts him. "Even though we just met, I have a feeling I already know you well enough to foresee that you and Jaejoong will get along superbly."
"Yoochun and I, we've known each other for a long time," Jaejoong says.
"Not that long, actually," Yoochun adds. "Just about two years."
"Two years is a long time," Jaejoong says, in all seriousness.
Changmin doesn't quite know how to react, but suddenly he understands what Yoochun means when he said that they were meant to meet. I've been waiting for this, Changmin thinks, until now.
Somehow along the way, Jaejoong takes it upon himself to watch out for Changmin, as though Changmin has become his responsibility. Yoochun makes fun of Changmin; you bring out his maternal instincts, he says and Changmin pretends to complain about it but he has never had someone look after him like this, and it secretly delights him.
"There's someone I want you to meet," Jaejoong says one day, out of the blue. His cheeks are pink and he shifts his weight from one leg to the other, like a nervous schoolboy. "He's someone special," he says and waits for a reaction.
Changmin blinks. "Okay," he says, having no idea why Jaejoong is behaving strangely. Jaejoong brings him to a cosy Japanese restaurant that Changmin has never been to, and the entire time, Jaejoong fidgets in his chair and chatters about mindless things.
"Who is it you want me to meet?" Changmin asks curiously, after sitting through ten minutes of Jaejoong’s fidgeting.
"He's a friend," Jaejoong says, but the flush on his face tells Changmin otherwise.
Yunho is the most handsome man Changmin has ever seen. When he walks into the restaurant, he carries a presence around him that is hard not to notice. He is tall, not as tall as Changmin, but still tall enough tower over everyone else.
Jaejoong smiles so hard when Yunho sits down Changmin cannot help but wonder if the corners of his lips are going to stretch all the way to his ears.
"This is Yunho," Jaejoong tells Changmin. "Yunho, this is Changmin."
"I've heard about you," Yunho says with a warm smile.
Changmin's heart hammers in his chest and he is certain that if he met Yunho somewhere else, and not as Jaejoong's significant other, he would have fallen. Just like that.
There is a fire in Jaejoong's eyes and a glow on his face that makes Changmin want to fall in love, just to see if he wears the head-over-heels look as well as Jaejoong does.
Changmin recognizes the sour taste that wells up in the back of his throat as a mix of envy and jealousy, and swallows hard to push the feelings away.
Over lunch, the three of them make small talk.
Yunho is a choreographer, and when he names a major entertainment agency he works for, Changmin's jaw drops. "You must be really good," Changmin says, impressed.
Yunho laughs in embarrassment and opens his mouth to reply, but is quickly interrupted by Jaejoong, who grabs onto his arm, eyes suddenly two times wider.
"Yunho," Jaejoong says urgently. "The tickets. You promised. Please don't tell me you forgot." Seeing the confused look on Changmin's face, Jaejoong turns to face him. "There's this amazing singer who belongs to the same company and I begged Yunho to use his connections to get tickets to his concert. He's really, really good. I've heard him sing before, and trust me, he's amazing."
Grinning, Yunho produces a pair of tickets from his pocket and Jaejoong claps his hands together gleefully in child-like manner.
"Take Changmin with you," Yunho says, surrendering the tickets to a beaming Jaejoong. “I’ll be busy.”
Changmin wants to decline. Crowded places do not agree with him, and being in a concert hall packed with screaming fans is not how Changmin wants to spend a Friday night.
"Ask Yoochun instead," Changmin suggests, but Jaejoong ignores him and announces loudly that this Friday night, he is taking Changmin out.
When Yoochun calls Changmin after lunch, and asks Changmin if he is free on Friday night to watch a movie, Jaejoong snatches the phone and informs Yoochun loudly that Changmin already has somewhere to be.
"You're not going to regret it," Jaejoong tells Changmin after hanging up on a bemused Yoochun. "I promise."
Changmin is not so certain, but Jaejoong looks so happy and excited that Changmin does not have the heart to decline, and he resigns himself to a painful Friday night.
Changmin yawns as the light floods the stage. The girl in front of him throws her hands into the air, shrieking wildly, and Changmin has to tilt his head to the side to be able to see the stage. He is sure that in five minutes, his neck is going to start aching and his eardrums will have popped.
"He's really good," Jaejoong tells Changmin earnestly, the sixth time since they sat down.
Changmin wonders what he is doing in this crowded place, packed with adoring fangirls, on a Friday night (when he could have been somewhere else - like watching a movie with Yoochun), waiting for some pretty boy to come on stage and sing. Next to him Jaejoong throws him an exasperated look.
"Stop making that miserable face," Jaejoong says.
"I'm not," Changmin says sullenly, the miserable look not budging from his face at all.
Jaejoong looks like he has a good retort ready when music starts playing. Distracted, Jaejoong looks away and promptly sucks in a breath dramatically. "Oh my God, he's here, he's here - " Jaejoong elbows Changmin hard to get his attention and points violently towards the stage.
Changmin turns back to stare at the stage and squints at the small figure walking to the centre. He gives up and glances at the large screen instead. He does a double-take, staring at the face on the bright screen.
The guy from the diner.
Who took his money, promised to come back in the morning to return it and didn't.
Changmin had given up his Friday night to watch him? He swears loudly, earning himself a disapproving look from Jaejoong.
The idiot from diner starts to sing and Changmin sits back to glare at the screen, resigned to the fact that he is stuck here for the rest of the night.
After two and half songs, Changmin is forced to admit that the idiot is actually good. His singing tugs at heartstrings, and next to him, Jaejoong has his eyes closed, swaying to the music. That idiot's pitch never falls, and Changmin thinks that this is the most beautiful thing he has heard in ages.
Still, he decides, crossing his arms, great singing does not excuse anyone from borrowing money and not returning it. The thought slips from his grasp, as that idiot hits a note that leaves Changmin breathless and when he can finally breathe normally again, Changmin realises that somehow, within that short span of time, he has lost his heart.
"You're insane," Jaejoong says, shouting after Changmin, who is determinedly walking towards the stage.
"I need to see that idiot," Changmin shouts back.
"He has a name, his name is Kim Junsu," Changmin hears Jaejoong saying, sounding exasperated. "And you're out of your mind! He's not going to see you, for heaven's sake - "
Changmin storms around, looking for some kind of door that leads backstage. He spies a door that has a notice that says STAFF ONLY, and yanks it open.
"You're not allowed in here," a member of staff tells Jaejoong as he follows Changmin through the door.
"I know," Jaejoong snarls at him. "Tell that maniac in front of me that!" Jaejoong shoves the fellow out of the way and races after Changmin. Jaejoong manages three steps and then someone grabs him and starts to haul him out of the place forcefully.
"Shim Changmin," Jaejoong shrieks.
Changmin turns around to see Jaejoong being thrown out, looking enraged, and he winces. Jaejoong is probably swearing about how he is never going to take Changmin anywhere ever again.
He taps a random staff member on the shoulder and flashes him a polite smile. "Sorry, do you know where I might find Kim Junsu?"
"Who are you?" the man says, startled, giving Changmin a wary once-over.
"Why don't you just tell me where he is?" Changmin suggests brightly, smiling even more widely.
As it turns out, the man does not need to tell Changmin anything, because two seconds later, Changmin spots Kim Junsu walking down the corridor, towelling his hair dry and laughing loudly. Changmin thinks that Kim Junsu will not be looking so happy very soon, considering the fact that Changmin is in a foul mood and wants to loop that towel around the idiot’s neck and yank.
Changmin marches up to him and feels accomplished when recognition flashes across Kim Junsu’s face.
"Hi," Changmin says, wiping any trace of a smile off his face.
"It's you!" Kim Junsu says, and breaks into a massive grin. "You came to watch me perform?"
"Yes, but only because I had nothing else to do," Changmin answers calmly.
The smile on Kim Junsu's face falters. "Right," he says after a pause.
"You didn't come back in the morning." Changmin decides to get straight to the point.
The smile vanishes completely and Kim Junsu looks guilty. "Look, I can explain," he starts. "And I'll definitely return the money to you. I can even return it now - wait -" He thrusts his hands into his pockets, and fumbles with his wallet.
"It wasn't a lot of money," Changmin says, getting angrier by the second. "I'd have forgotten about it if I didn't see you today. I'd have treated it as an act of charity - maybe you really needed the money. Maybe you were really hard up for cash. I would have forgotten about it, but today, I'm dragged here by my friend to watch some next big thing and it's you - "
"I said I can explain," Kim Junsu interrupts, visibly flustered. He pushes money into Changmin's hands - double the amount that Changmin had lent him. "I'm returning you double, okay, I'm really sorry about not going back in the morning - "
Changmin loosens his grip, lets the money flutter onto the floor. “I don't need your charity," Changmin says, his face burning with heat.
"At least take the money I owe you," Kim Junsu says, looking twice as embarrassed. "I'm really sorry."
"Tell me something," Changmin says. "Did you only recall this when I walked up to you just now?"
Kim Junsu opens and closes his mouth. He seems to be having some sort of internal battle with himself, but after a few seconds, he lowers his head guiltily in an unmistakeable nod.
"You're unbelievable," Changmin says in disgust, turns around, and walks out. He knows that he's overreacting. He knows that he is being unreasonable. People make mistakes, people forget things, and Changmin is a forgiving person. Yet, somehow, Changmin can't let this go.
He can't.
Maybe it is because it hurts. It hurts to know that Kim Junsu (who took Changmin's emotions on a roller-coaster ride, whose performance Changmin wants to watch, over and over again) found it so easy to forget about Changmin, when Changmin -
Changmin will never forget him.
Continue to Part 2
MASTERLIST OF FICS HERE