Super Junior {Siwon/Sungmin ; Santa Baby}
Title: Santa Baby
Fandom: Super Junior (AU)
Pairing: Siwon/Sungmin, implied Kyuhyun/Zhou Mi
Word count: 5,669
Rating: PG-13
Summary: "It's just shopping for presents," he says, which is how, half an hour later, they find themselves standing in an aisle in Toys R Us, surrounded by so much pink that even Sungmin looks vaguely unsure.
A/N: so this is the result of a couple of things. First, I had a casual fic exchange going on with noraehaeyo in which I would write cute domestic fic in return for porn. Secondly, crazychickencow and I kind of fleshed this au out extensively, to the point where now there is QMi and future Hanchul. And thirdly, this picture of Siwon, which led to us imagining him and Sungmin standing in an aisle at Toys R Us going THEY ALL LOOK THE SAAAAAAAAAAME. So here :D festive fic! I hope all you guys have an awesome Christmas \o/
also brought to you by Siwon with children
Santa Baby
Siwon goes straight from work to the campus, picking Sungmin up outside the coffee shop that he's been studying in. He dumps his stuff on the back seat and buckles up as Siwon joins the traffic again. "How long do you think this will take?" he asks. "How long can you leave the girls with your mother before she starts telling them you're never coming home?"
"Two hours, tops," Siwon says, tapping his fingers against the steering wheel. It's rush hour, and Christmas time on top of that; it seems like the entirety of Seoul is on the roads. "I figure it'll only take an hour at best anyway. I've got their lists, I know that the shop sells everything on the list. It's just a case of finding them and then buying them."
Sungmin, perhaps realising that Siwon is close to a full scale break down, lays a hand on his forearm. "If you want, it's not too late to just let your mother do this," he says, very kindly. "She did say she was happy enough to do it."
His mother hadn't said that so much as implied that Siwon would not be able to handle it and would crash out of life and end up as a disease riddled addict if he tried to go Christmas shopping for presents for his own daughters. It's what she always implies with happen if Siwon wants to do something that she's been doing for the past couple of years. The thing is, Siwon doesn't know how to do this. He has a damn good idea built up from years of witnessing people do it, but he's never actually tried it for himself. It is, of course, something that his wife always did. All he ever had to do was help her with the wrapping on Christmas Eve, and then put the presents downstairs at 3AM. Even buying presents for her had just been about getting her some expensive piece of jewellery, it hadn't exactly been brain surgery.
"No," he says, determined. "I can do this. It's not hard, it's just buying presents. I need to prove that I can actually do stuff without her."
Sungmin smiles and settles back into his seat. "It's just shopping for presents," he agrees.
Siwon manages to crack a smile of his own and pats him on the knee. "Besides, I have you," he says. "How hard can it be?"
Which is how, half an hour later, they find themselves standing in an aisle in Toys R Us, surrounded by so much pink that even Sungmin looks vaguely unsure. Siwon is paused in a position that suggests he knows what he's doing, with the lists that he got the girls to write out in front of him, but in reality he's suddenly a lot more worried about the situation than he had ever been previously.
"Shit," he says under his breath, gaining a glare from a woman shopping nearby. He swallows and steps closer to Sungmin, who in turn steps that bit closer so that their arms are pressed together. "There's so many."
"Which ones did they want?" Sungmin asks, craning to look at the sheets of paper. He looks like he wants to just grab the nearest one and bolt.
"Sajun wants cheerleader Barbie and the Barbie townhouse, and Sayoung wants Princess Barbie." Siwon looks around at the shelves. "So they should be around here somewhere."
They stare at the selection for a long time, Siwon becoming increasingly aware that there are a couple of women in the same aisle giving them pretty cold looks. Nervous and feeling pretty judged, even though he's not doing anything wrong, he dives forward and picks one up that looks like it should be the right one.
Sungmin takes it from him, looking carefully. "No, look," he says, tapping the box. "This is Glitter Princess Barbie."
Siwon stares at him blankly.
"It's not the right one."
"Oh." Siwon puts it back on the shelf. After a couple more minutes of scanning he manages to find cheerleader Barbie, which he puts triumphantly in the cart. Sungmin, down the other side, manages to find the townhouse, nestled between a remote control car and some sort of castle. He holds it, looking very pleased with himself and pretty much far cuter than a grown man should be, especially in a toy store, which Siwon thinks is probably out of bounds for enthusiastic kissing.
This just leaves the Princess Barbie. They've looked at everything that seemed right, and now Siwon picks up a final box. "This is it," he says firmly.
"That's Fairy Princess Barbie," Sungmin says heavily. "That's not right either."
"They all look the same!" Siwon shoves the Barbie back onto the shelf and stares helplessly at Sungmin. "Do you think Sayoung is evil enough to write something down that doesn't actually exist?"
"Siwon, she's four years old," Sungmin says with a sigh. "She's not evil. She is, however, probably young enough to not know the full name of whatever it is that she wants."
Siwon pulls the Christmas list out. It's messy and more of a scribble, but it definitely only says "Princess Barbie". "So if what she's written down isn't what she meant, then what am I supposed to do?"
"I guess you'll just have to pick what you think she meant," Sungmin says gently.
Panic like a tidal wave hits Siwon. This is, he reflects, why he really should have just let his mother go shopping for him. He doesn't have a clue what he's doing here. He's spent an entire year trying to get to know these girls and yet he can't even decide what Barbie doll they probably want. Worse than that, what if he chooses the wrong one and they take it as another sign that he doesn't really care about him, that the year has just been a ruse and now he's going to go back to being a dad who doesn't seem like he care? Sometimes the trust that they're placing in him to not be that person again feels like it could be broken too easily.
Sungmin looks alarmed, which possibly means he looks like he's having a breakdown. "Siwon, it's just a doll," he says, laying a hand on his forearm again.
"What if I pick the wrong one and Sayoung doesn't love me anymore," he says hoarsely.
"That is the most ridiculous thing I have every heard," Sungmin tells him. "If it's the wrong one then you can just say that Santa didn't have the one she wanted, whatever that one is, and that he brought that one instead. She's four, Siwon. It's not going to scar her."
"No, but," Siwon says, before falling silent. He folds the piece of paper up and slips it back in his pocket. Staring miserably between Glitter Princess and Fairy Princess, he runs a hand through his hair and says, "I think she'll want the Fairy Princess Barbie. So that her doll can match her own fairy wings."
"Great," said Sungmin, picking the box up. "Don't worry so much about it, Siwon. She's not going to think that it's the end of the world if you get the wrong doll." He nudges Siwon with his hip and starts down the aisle for the check outs. Siwon watches him, worrying his bottom lip with his teeth. He feels a little like he's just made a decision that could affect the rest of his life. He knows it's stupid, he knows that in the end, this doll isn't going to affect anything, but he just wants this to be perfect.
In the coffee shop opposite the store, he warms his hands on his latte and says, "The last two Christmases haven't been great. I worry about the girls, you know? Christmas is supposed to be fun and a happy time, but, Sayoung in paticular, all she remembers is the bad times."
"Give them a Christmas like the ones you had," Sungmin suggests brightly, mug pressed to his lips.
Siwon snorts. "That's what we had last year, at mum's place. The decorations all matched and lunch was served on the best china with pressed napkins. Opening presents was a military operation and no one was allowed to play with them because it was Jesus's birthday." Siwon sighs. "It was awful. It was like being plunged back in time, only with the added bonus of being bugged about how it had been almost a year and I should really be thinking about moving on and dating the daughters of her friends. I was miserable and the girls were miserable and I can't let it happen again." He smiles wryly. "Still, better than the year before. Nothing like your wife walking out on Christmas Eve to make Christmas memorable. I still don't know how I got through that day."
Sungmin reaches across and takes his hand, squeezing gently. He opens his mouth, but then closes it again, biting his bottom lip, looking like he's just stopping himself from saying whatever he was going to ask. After a pause he asks, "Are you sure you wouldn't like me to-?"
"No." Siwon shakes his head. "Not that I wouldn't love to spend the day with you, but like I said, Christmas is supposed to be fun, and it's not going to be fun for you if you're stuck at my parents, putting up with my father ignoring you and listening to my mother sniping."
"If you're sure."
"I'm sure," Siwon smiles. "Besides, it's not like we're not going to see each other, after all. What was it you wanted to ask?"
His question catches Sungmin off guard, just like he'd hoped it would. He stutters something and then, as Siwon just continues watching him expectantly, he smile sheepishly and says, "I was just wondering, you know, since you don't really talk about her, I was just...wondering if you'd been in love with her."
Now it's Siwon's turn to be off guard, mainly because no one has ever asked him that question. No one had ever asked him, even on their wedding day, if he was in love with her. He couldn't even remember if he'd ever told her that he loved her. "I guess so," he says after he thinks about it. "I think I loved her because I was supposed to love her. I was fond of her, certainly, but then we'd been dating for a couple of years before we got married. It's not as though she was a stranger to me."
"But she still-"
"It was as much my fault as it was hers. I thought I was being the perfect husband, just like my father, but the thing was, she wasn't my mother. She wasn't able to put up with the long hours and me never being there and never helping out with the girls."
"But you're a good dad, Siwon."
"Maybe now. Not back then. I just laughed it off when she tried to tell me that it was too much. I was an asshole, Sungmin. I thought I had it all worked out but in reality I didn't know anything. She couldn't even handle my mother. It's not as though my mother just dislikes you, she dislikes everyone for not being exactly the same as her. The fact that we'd had two girls instead of a son was unforgiveable."
"Do you ever think about what could have been?"
"I used to." Siwon gives him a smile, threading their fingers together. "Not anymore."
He is woken up at six on Christmas morning by a knee in his stomach and hair in his mouth. He yawns and rubs his face, tired after the last minute wrapping, and sneaking downstairs at two to pile the presents under the tree. Sajun is bouncing on his bed, pajamas twisted in her haste. Sayoung is unusually quiet, one arm fastening around his neck as he sits up, her thumb in her mouth. He gently pulls it out and says, "Merry Christmas, sweetie."
She doesn't answer. Instead, Sajun shouts, "Merry Christmas, daddy," throwing her arms in the hair and bouncing more enthusiastically. He catches her by the waistband and holds her still, scared she'll fall off and they'll spend the day in the emergency room. "Daddy, daddy, has Santa Claus been?"
He can't help but smile at her obvious excitement. "I don't know," he says, playing innocent. "Why don't you go see?"
She bounces off the bed and hits the floor running. He hears her take the stairs two at a time, although he's told her before not to do that, then her voice shrieking happily. Siwon swings his legs out of bed, but Sayoung is still holding on. When he stands up, she hangs from around his neck. "Urk," he says, reaching around so he can hold her against his waist. He's starting to be a little worried. "Everything okay?" he asks.
"I thought Sungmin-oppa would be here," she whispers into his ear, lisping somewhat through the gap on the top row of her teeth.
"Sungmin-oppa?" he asks, surprised. There had never been any mention of Sungmin staying for Christmas in front of the girls, even when it had potentially been a possibility, since he hadn't wanted to get their hopes up only to break them, so quite why Sayoung thinks Sungmin would have been there, he doesn't know. "Why?"
"Because it's Christmas," she says simply, like that explains everything, and Siwon realises that in her childish way, she's saying that Sungmin should be here because Christmas is a time for family and in her mind, Sungmin is part of their family. He brushes the hair back and kisses her on the forehead.
"He'll be here later on," he says brightly. He starts for the door, bouncing a little as he walks, the excitement of the day catching. "Let's go open your presents first though!"
He thinks about it, however, as he watches them rip wrapping paper off the boxes under the tree. He gets sucked off into a fantasy where Sungmin was there, laughing with him as Sayoung declares the Fairy Princess Barbie the only thing she has ever wanted in her entire life, which is somewhat of an exaggeration but Siwon's too happy that she likes it to even care. He watches her bound around the room, back to her energetic self, and is suddenly very sad that Sungmin isn't here. He'd have liked to have shared this with him. Then he shakes his head, frowning at himself. Sungmin, he reminds himself, has his own friends and family he can spend the day with.
Still, it plays on his mind, and so once he's managed to get the girls dressed in their new outfits (Sajun in a red check dress, Sayoung in pale pink) and is loading them in the car to head to the Church, he sends off a quick text to Sungmin wishing him a Merry Christmas. He gets one back soon after complaining that his roommate, Heechul, is both refusing to go to Church and refusing to wear a hat from one of the crackers. Much as Siwon likes Sungmin's best friend, he's still very glad that he's not having to spend Christmas with him. He's probably more stressful than his parents.
His mother takes one look at the girls - who look perfect - and starts fussing over them, straightening already straight bows and pulling up socks that weren't drooping. He lets her do it, knowing that she'll just be in a bad mood for the rest of the day if he doesn't, and greets his father, who never quite looks like he knows who Siwon is. He sees his mother looking around, as if she's expecting Sungmin to pop up out of the woodwork and humiliate her outside her own Church. "He's not coming," he says heavily. "He's got his own to go to, so don't worry about that."
"I don't know what you're talking about," she sniffs, gathering Sayoung up into her arms. "Did Santa bring you everything you wanted?" she asks, nuzzling into her hair.
"Yes!" Sajun answers for her younger sister. "Santa brought me the Barbie townhouse and a fairy tale book and a Chemistry set!" Which is when his mother gives him a glare and his heart sinks.
"A Chemistry set, Siwon?" she hisses as they're taking their seats. "Honestly! She's a five year old girl!"
"She's interested in science," Siwon says. "It's suitable for her age group and it'll be good for her."
"She's-"
"Mum, if your protests all boil down to the fact that she's a girl, Mum, then I don't want to hear it."
She falls slent, which is all the confirmation that he needs, though she's still scowling at him. He takes his seat on the pews, feeling the start of a stress headache starting. He just has to get through lunch after this and then he can escape home and watch the girls play with their toys and relax in front of the television.
The headache, however, just gets worse after the service, when he finds out that his mother has bought Sajun and Sayoung a pair of ballet shoes. They're overjoyed with them, though perhaps not really understanding what they are - to them, they just look like pretty shoes - but Siwon blinks and then turns to her questioningly. "Mum, they don't do ballet," he points out.
"I know," she says brightly, "which is the second part of my gift. I'm paying for a year's worth of ballet classes!"
"But-" Siwon is torn. On the one hand, it's a generous gift and he's always wanted to let the girls take some form of a dance class, just to see if they'd enjoy it. On the other hand, he can't help but be somewhat suspicious, since everything his mother does has some form of ulterior motive. "Why?"
"Because it will help with their confidence," she says, "and every little girl should know how to dance like a swan."
"Oh," he says, watching Sayoung attempt to float around the room like her idea of a ballerina. She's rather heavy footed. "Well, thanks, Mum. I'm sure they'll love it."
"Well, of course they'll love it," she sniffs. "It's an appropriate gift." He rolls his eyes.
Lunch is rather somber, because his mother doesn't like chatter at the dinner table and his father never says anything anyway, which is probably why his mother forbids talking. He eats well but the girls are, as always, affected by the silence and pick at their food, so as a result there's still half of their meal left when it comes to clearing up. He ushers them into the living room before his mother can chastise them, where they sit on the floor making their ballet shoes tap out dances on the carpet. He offers to help clear up but is told that's not his job. As a result he has to sit through half a Christmas special on television before he's able to say, "Well, we'd better be getting off."
"But it's so soon!" his mother cries. She's right, of course, it's only just after three, but he's been thinking yearningly of the bottle of wine he has in the fridge for the past hour and a bit and he doesn't think he can take much more.
"Yes, well," he says, getting their coats from the hallway, the girls waiting by his legs, clearly happy to be leaving too, "we've got things to do. Toys to play with. I've got people coming over."
"Is one of those people him?" she asks coldly.
"Sungmin is coming over, yes."
"Oh, Siwon!" she cries, sounding almost heartbroken; it would be more effective if he didn't know it was put on. "It's supposed to be a time for family, not - not flings!"
"Mum, I-" He doesn't say what he almost said, not wanting to let her know just how badly he feels that Sungmin is part of his family now. The whole day has felt strangely empty without him, like Siwon is missing a limb. He doesn't want to give her that much of an insight, though, so instead he says, "I'll call you, Mum. Have a good night."
He kisses her goodbye and then turns into the cold air, the sun already beginning to set. By the time they pull into the drive, it's completely dark, their breath puffing white. He ushers the girls up to their rooms to get changed into something warmer and more comfortable, makes sure that the heating it on, and takes a couple of painkillers while the kettle boils. When they come back downstairs - Sayoung having misunderstood "comfortable" as she's wearing her fairy wings - they pile on the sofa, complete with their dolls, and watch The Wizard of Oz.
Just after Dorothy meets the Scarecrow, the doorbell rings. He untangles himself from the mess of little girls and plastic limbs and pulls open the door to reveal who he assumes to be Sungmin from the nose. It's hard to tell, though, because he's bundled up so tight; his hat is pulled low over his face and his scarf pulled up over his mouth. He's covered in a fine layer of fresh snow. "Hi," he says.
"Did you walk here?" Siwon asks, aghast, pulling Sungmin inside and dusting the snow off him. "You were supposed to call if you couldn't get a taxi!"
"No, it's okay, I didn't walk all the way." Sungmin begins unwinding his scarf, which seems like it could take a while. "Kyuhyun dropped me at the end of the street. He was picking Heechul up to take him to the party Zhou Mi is having." He pauses, pulling his hat from his head and running a hand through it in an attempt to get rid of his hat hair. "Well, I suppose it's Kyuhyun's party too, since he lives there too, but Zhou Mi's the one organizing it."
Siwon hesitated, hanging Sungmin's coat up. "Zhou Mi's having a party? You don't want to go? You could call Kyuhyun, ask him to come get you. I mean, it's not like we're doing anything exciting. We're just watching The Wizard of Oz."
"I love that film." Sungmin smiles, wrapping his arms around Siwon's waist and stepping closer. "Stop worrying. I want to be here."
"Oh," Siwon says. Sungmin's lingering hat hair is the cutest thing he's ever seen. He leans down, kisses him, his warm lips to Sungmin's cold pair. "Hi."
"Hi back."
They smile at each other, then Sungmin sticks his cold hands up Siwon's shirt, and Siwon lets out a decidedly unmanly yell and Sungmin dissolves into giggles. The girls come to see what the noise is over, interrupting their moment as Sayoung launches herself at Sungmin, shrieking his name. Sungmin lifts her up, kissing her cheek. Without even needing to be asked, she starts telling him, at triple speed, about their day and how much she missed him and whether he'll watch the film with her and if he's sleeping over that night. Sajun interjects with her own happy shouts. It takes Siwon quite a while to get them to calm down and back through into the living room. Sajun cuddles against his left side, Sungmin's head rests against his right shoulder, and Sayoung sits in Sungmin's lap.
"I swear," Siwon mutters, just before they gets sucked back into the film, "they love you more than they love me."
"Aww," Sungmin says, and kisses his cheek.
When the girls are tucked up in bed, worn out after the day, Siwon lies against the arm of the sofa, Sungmin between his legs, stroking his hand up and down his side. Some old black and white film plays out on the television screen, though Siwon isn't paying attention; Sungmin is the one with an interest in those kind of films. "I'm glad you're here," he says. "I mean, I know you had your own day, with your friends and-"
"Next year," Sungmin interrupts, "I want to come to Church with you and go for lunch with you and just...spend the day with you." He twists his head around so he can smile at Siwon. "It didn't feel right, somehow. I love my friends, and I had a good day, but it just wasn't the same."
Siwon swallows, trying to clear the sudden lump in his throat. He isn't sure if it's because of the sentiment or whether it's because Sungmin had said next year. "Okay," he says, voice quiet. "I'd love that. Honestly, I've just been wanting this for the entire day. Plus, Sayoung asked where you were this morning, I don't think she'd have any objections."
Sungmin stretches up and kisses him, with the end result that before long, Siwon is pressing him into the cushions of the sofa, a hand curled against the base of his skull, while Sungmin's hands pull at the hem of his t-shirt. Before he lets them get too carried away, however, Siwon pulls away, breaks the kiss, and says, "No, first, I've got a present for you."
"Oh, me too," says Sungmin, looking a little surprised. "I've got some for the girls, too."
"...You didn't have to do that," Siwon says, the rush of affection warm through him.
"I wanted to. I can't believe I forgot about it." He's still got one hand on Siwon's shirt hem. He slides his hand up against his stomach and lets his fingers dance over Siwon's abs. "I guess I got distracted."
Siwon groans and pushes him away, batting his hands a little. "Not the time," he says. "I have to give you this. Give me a minute."
He takes the stairs as quickly as he dares, tip-toeing past the bedroom doors, grabbing the gift from his room and then back downstairs. Sungmin is holding a box of his own on his lap, looking exceedingly nervous, biting his bottom lip again. His back is almost comically straight. "This is for you," he says, holding out the box before Siwon has even sat down next to him. Siwon takes it from him, smiling. His obvious worry is helping Siwon relax. He takes a seat next to him, making a show of shaking it next to his ear. It's quite heavy.
"Heechul thought it was stupid," Sungmin says. "But then I think that was just because Heechul resents money being spent on people other than him. Zhou Mi scolded because he didn't think it was romantic enough."
"What did he get Kyuhyun?" Siwon asks, picking at the edge of the wrapping paper and trying to imagine what Kyuhyun would do if confronted with something that Zhou Mi considered romantic.
"A karaoke machine," Sungmin says, "but he's had it specially programmed to only play soppy love songs so I don't think Kyuhyun is going to be that happy." Then, Siwon ripping a thin line of paper off, he snaps. "Siwon, just open it, and put me out of my misery, please."
"Okay, okay," Siwon laughs, finally starting properly.
He pulls the paper off carefully, trying to not ruin it in a show of haste. Inside is a shoe box, and as he lifts the lid off to reveal a pair of running shoes that he knows, from seeing them in a shop window, are pretty expensive, Sungmin says, "I thought, since you'd been saying that your shoes were getting a bit threadbare, I could get you a new pair. I know it's not exactly a romantic first Christmas present but they're supposed to be pretty good."
"They're supposed to be the best," Siwon says, turning his stare from the shoes to Sungmin's face. "Sungmin, you can't afford these."
"Sure I can," Sungmin says brightly. "I mean, it took up most of a paycheck but Heechul agreed to cover the rent this month since he was filled with the Christmas spirit. And possibly I bribed him with a bottle of rum."
"Thank you," Siwon says, not really sure what else to say. It's probably the first time in a fair few years, possibly since he was a child, that he's been given a present with some thought in it. His presents, ever since he turned eighteen, have been variations on the socks and tie package. He puts the shoe he'd picked up back in the box and said, "Are you sure?"
"Siwon, I wouldn't have given you them if I wasn't sure." Sungmin holds out his hands, practically bouncing now that he knows that his own gift had gone down well. "Is that mine? Can I keep the bow? I want to glue it to Zhou Mi's hair."
Laughing, Siwon hands his own larger parcel over, slightly squishy and rustling. Sungmin doesn't waste time trying to work out what it is; he unwraps it quickly, trying to be careful with the paper like Siwon had but ultimately failing. He pauses when a small section of it is revealed. He recognises it immediately, and sucks his breath in with a gasp. "Siwon, you didn't," he says, eyes going wide.
"Why wouldn't I?" Siwon asks, slightly too smug, slightly too intrigued by the glee on Sungmin's face. He could probably do this every day if he could see that expression.
"Never mind me not being able to afford those, you certainly can't afford this, not with the girls." Sungmin pulls the backpack from the mess of paper, holding it up so he can look at it better. It's pale pink leather, with the Dolce and Gabbana logo done in silver across the front below the zip. Sungmin had pointed it out one day in a department store when they'd been shopping for new jeans for Sajun, joking that when he was a famous song writer, the first thing he'd buy would be that. Siwon has saved him the trouble.
Siwon shrugs. "I saved up," he says. He taps the bag with a knuckle. "Open it."
Sungmin does so slowly, still muttering about how it was totally over the top as a present. The zip pulled smoothly and he pulled out some books, turning them over so he can read the covers. "Are these-?"
Siwon takes one of them, flipping through until he can get to a certain page. "Just some sheet music," he says. "It was hard to find the books with your favourite songs in them. Harder still to get Heechul to tell what your favourite songs are." He grins. "I had to bribe him myself."
"He's just bitter and lonely," Sungmin says, flipping through the books. "Siwon, honestly, this is - I'm not going to cry but it was a close call for a second."
"It's just sheet music," Siwon laughs.
"Don't ruin it," Sungmin says. He puts the books back into the bag and lays it reverantly by the side of the sofa. Then he turns to Siwon, fingers curling back around the hem of his t-shirt, pulling it up so that it bunches somewhat under his arms. He leans it to kiss Siwon, as he trails his fingers down his stomach and then starts pulling the button on his jeans through the button hole. "Now see," he murmurs, Siwon tugging him into his lap, "this is why I'm glad I'm not at Zhou Mi's party."
Siwon wakes the next morning to an empty bed. He touches the other pillow but it's long gone cold. He squints one eye at the clock and is shocked to see that it's after ten. He expected there to be girls bounding in at seven, just like they always do on days where he's really allowed to lie in. He'd also expected Sungmin to be there; Sungmin isn't really a morning person and so he's surprised that he's even awake, never mind apparently up, especially after a rather late night the night before.
He rolls onto his back, stretching out all his limbs. He's just able to make out noise from downstairs, the girls laughing and shouting something, and Sungmin's voice joining in. He smiles slowly, and takes his time getting up, pulling his robe on and ducking into the bathroom to brush his teeth before he heads downstairs. They're in the living room, Sajun with a remote for the new remote controlled car that Sungmin is holding. Sayoung is dressed in a new fairy outfit to match the wings she's had for a couple of months now.
She bounces up to him, arms upstretched. He gathers her up, and she kisses his cheek. "Look, Daddy!" she says, a little too loud for how close she is to his ears. "Santa forgot some of our presents but Sungmin-oppa brought them for us!"
"Wow!" says Siwon, giving Sungmin a grin over Sayoung's head. He grins back, sitting cross legged, pajama pants pulled up to reveal bare feet. Siwon knows he should be shocked to find that he's even attracted to his toes but he's not any more. He's getting used to this sort of thing. He puts Sayoung down and she goes wafting off, twirling her skirt from left to right. Sungmin hands Sajun the car and stands up, walking over to Siwon to give him a quick kiss.
"Good morning," he says.
"Seriously," Siwon says, "you didn't have to-"
"I wanted to," Sungmin says. He slips his arms around Siwon's waist and gives his ass a discreet pat. "Should I make us some coffee?"
He makes to pull away to go through to the kitchen, but Siwon catches his wrist and pulls him flush against him. "You remember how you asked about my wife?" Sungmin nods, a little apprehensive. "I have never loved anyone the way I love you," Siwon says earnestly.
"Christ," Sungmin says, "I only offered to make coffee."
Fandom: Super Junior (AU)
Pairing: Siwon/Sungmin, implied Kyuhyun/Zhou Mi
Word count: 5,669
Rating: PG-13
Summary: "It's just shopping for presents," he says, which is how, half an hour later, they find themselves standing in an aisle in Toys R Us, surrounded by so much pink that even Sungmin looks vaguely unsure.
A/N: so this is the result of a couple of things. First, I had a casual fic exchange going on with noraehaeyo in which I would write cute domestic fic in return for porn. Secondly, crazychickencow and I kind of fleshed this au out extensively, to the point where now there is QMi and future Hanchul. And thirdly, this picture of Siwon, which led to us imagining him and Sungmin standing in an aisle at Toys R Us going THEY ALL LOOK THE SAAAAAAAAAAME. So here :D festive fic! I hope all you guys have an awesome Christmas \o/
also brought to you by Siwon with children
Santa Baby
Siwon goes straight from work to the campus, picking Sungmin up outside the coffee shop that he's been studying in. He dumps his stuff on the back seat and buckles up as Siwon joins the traffic again. "How long do you think this will take?" he asks. "How long can you leave the girls with your mother before she starts telling them you're never coming home?"
"Two hours, tops," Siwon says, tapping his fingers against the steering wheel. It's rush hour, and Christmas time on top of that; it seems like the entirety of Seoul is on the roads. "I figure it'll only take an hour at best anyway. I've got their lists, I know that the shop sells everything on the list. It's just a case of finding them and then buying them."
Sungmin, perhaps realising that Siwon is close to a full scale break down, lays a hand on his forearm. "If you want, it's not too late to just let your mother do this," he says, very kindly. "She did say she was happy enough to do it."
His mother hadn't said that so much as implied that Siwon would not be able to handle it and would crash out of life and end up as a disease riddled addict if he tried to go Christmas shopping for presents for his own daughters. It's what she always implies with happen if Siwon wants to do something that she's been doing for the past couple of years. The thing is, Siwon doesn't know how to do this. He has a damn good idea built up from years of witnessing people do it, but he's never actually tried it for himself. It is, of course, something that his wife always did. All he ever had to do was help her with the wrapping on Christmas Eve, and then put the presents downstairs at 3AM. Even buying presents for her had just been about getting her some expensive piece of jewellery, it hadn't exactly been brain surgery.
"No," he says, determined. "I can do this. It's not hard, it's just buying presents. I need to prove that I can actually do stuff without her."
Sungmin smiles and settles back into his seat. "It's just shopping for presents," he agrees.
Siwon manages to crack a smile of his own and pats him on the knee. "Besides, I have you," he says. "How hard can it be?"
Which is how, half an hour later, they find themselves standing in an aisle in Toys R Us, surrounded by so much pink that even Sungmin looks vaguely unsure. Siwon is paused in a position that suggests he knows what he's doing, with the lists that he got the girls to write out in front of him, but in reality he's suddenly a lot more worried about the situation than he had ever been previously.
"Shit," he says under his breath, gaining a glare from a woman shopping nearby. He swallows and steps closer to Sungmin, who in turn steps that bit closer so that their arms are pressed together. "There's so many."
"Which ones did they want?" Sungmin asks, craning to look at the sheets of paper. He looks like he wants to just grab the nearest one and bolt.
"Sajun wants cheerleader Barbie and the Barbie townhouse, and Sayoung wants Princess Barbie." Siwon looks around at the shelves. "So they should be around here somewhere."
They stare at the selection for a long time, Siwon becoming increasingly aware that there are a couple of women in the same aisle giving them pretty cold looks. Nervous and feeling pretty judged, even though he's not doing anything wrong, he dives forward and picks one up that looks like it should be the right one.
Sungmin takes it from him, looking carefully. "No, look," he says, tapping the box. "This is Glitter Princess Barbie."
Siwon stares at him blankly.
"It's not the right one."
"Oh." Siwon puts it back on the shelf. After a couple more minutes of scanning he manages to find cheerleader Barbie, which he puts triumphantly in the cart. Sungmin, down the other side, manages to find the townhouse, nestled between a remote control car and some sort of castle. He holds it, looking very pleased with himself and pretty much far cuter than a grown man should be, especially in a toy store, which Siwon thinks is probably out of bounds for enthusiastic kissing.
This just leaves the Princess Barbie. They've looked at everything that seemed right, and now Siwon picks up a final box. "This is it," he says firmly.
"That's Fairy Princess Barbie," Sungmin says heavily. "That's not right either."
"They all look the same!" Siwon shoves the Barbie back onto the shelf and stares helplessly at Sungmin. "Do you think Sayoung is evil enough to write something down that doesn't actually exist?"
"Siwon, she's four years old," Sungmin says with a sigh. "She's not evil. She is, however, probably young enough to not know the full name of whatever it is that she wants."
Siwon pulls the Christmas list out. It's messy and more of a scribble, but it definitely only says "Princess Barbie". "So if what she's written down isn't what she meant, then what am I supposed to do?"
"I guess you'll just have to pick what you think she meant," Sungmin says gently.
Panic like a tidal wave hits Siwon. This is, he reflects, why he really should have just let his mother go shopping for him. He doesn't have a clue what he's doing here. He's spent an entire year trying to get to know these girls and yet he can't even decide what Barbie doll they probably want. Worse than that, what if he chooses the wrong one and they take it as another sign that he doesn't really care about him, that the year has just been a ruse and now he's going to go back to being a dad who doesn't seem like he care? Sometimes the trust that they're placing in him to not be that person again feels like it could be broken too easily.
Sungmin looks alarmed, which possibly means he looks like he's having a breakdown. "Siwon, it's just a doll," he says, laying a hand on his forearm again.
"What if I pick the wrong one and Sayoung doesn't love me anymore," he says hoarsely.
"That is the most ridiculous thing I have every heard," Sungmin tells him. "If it's the wrong one then you can just say that Santa didn't have the one she wanted, whatever that one is, and that he brought that one instead. She's four, Siwon. It's not going to scar her."
"No, but," Siwon says, before falling silent. He folds the piece of paper up and slips it back in his pocket. Staring miserably between Glitter Princess and Fairy Princess, he runs a hand through his hair and says, "I think she'll want the Fairy Princess Barbie. So that her doll can match her own fairy wings."
"Great," said Sungmin, picking the box up. "Don't worry so much about it, Siwon. She's not going to think that it's the end of the world if you get the wrong doll." He nudges Siwon with his hip and starts down the aisle for the check outs. Siwon watches him, worrying his bottom lip with his teeth. He feels a little like he's just made a decision that could affect the rest of his life. He knows it's stupid, he knows that in the end, this doll isn't going to affect anything, but he just wants this to be perfect.
In the coffee shop opposite the store, he warms his hands on his latte and says, "The last two Christmases haven't been great. I worry about the girls, you know? Christmas is supposed to be fun and a happy time, but, Sayoung in paticular, all she remembers is the bad times."
"Give them a Christmas like the ones you had," Sungmin suggests brightly, mug pressed to his lips.
Siwon snorts. "That's what we had last year, at mum's place. The decorations all matched and lunch was served on the best china with pressed napkins. Opening presents was a military operation and no one was allowed to play with them because it was Jesus's birthday." Siwon sighs. "It was awful. It was like being plunged back in time, only with the added bonus of being bugged about how it had been almost a year and I should really be thinking about moving on and dating the daughters of her friends. I was miserable and the girls were miserable and I can't let it happen again." He smiles wryly. "Still, better than the year before. Nothing like your wife walking out on Christmas Eve to make Christmas memorable. I still don't know how I got through that day."
Sungmin reaches across and takes his hand, squeezing gently. He opens his mouth, but then closes it again, biting his bottom lip, looking like he's just stopping himself from saying whatever he was going to ask. After a pause he asks, "Are you sure you wouldn't like me to-?"
"No." Siwon shakes his head. "Not that I wouldn't love to spend the day with you, but like I said, Christmas is supposed to be fun, and it's not going to be fun for you if you're stuck at my parents, putting up with my father ignoring you and listening to my mother sniping."
"If you're sure."
"I'm sure," Siwon smiles. "Besides, it's not like we're not going to see each other, after all. What was it you wanted to ask?"
His question catches Sungmin off guard, just like he'd hoped it would. He stutters something and then, as Siwon just continues watching him expectantly, he smile sheepishly and says, "I was just wondering, you know, since you don't really talk about her, I was just...wondering if you'd been in love with her."
Now it's Siwon's turn to be off guard, mainly because no one has ever asked him that question. No one had ever asked him, even on their wedding day, if he was in love with her. He couldn't even remember if he'd ever told her that he loved her. "I guess so," he says after he thinks about it. "I think I loved her because I was supposed to love her. I was fond of her, certainly, but then we'd been dating for a couple of years before we got married. It's not as though she was a stranger to me."
"But she still-"
"It was as much my fault as it was hers. I thought I was being the perfect husband, just like my father, but the thing was, she wasn't my mother. She wasn't able to put up with the long hours and me never being there and never helping out with the girls."
"But you're a good dad, Siwon."
"Maybe now. Not back then. I just laughed it off when she tried to tell me that it was too much. I was an asshole, Sungmin. I thought I had it all worked out but in reality I didn't know anything. She couldn't even handle my mother. It's not as though my mother just dislikes you, she dislikes everyone for not being exactly the same as her. The fact that we'd had two girls instead of a son was unforgiveable."
"Do you ever think about what could have been?"
"I used to." Siwon gives him a smile, threading their fingers together. "Not anymore."
He is woken up at six on Christmas morning by a knee in his stomach and hair in his mouth. He yawns and rubs his face, tired after the last minute wrapping, and sneaking downstairs at two to pile the presents under the tree. Sajun is bouncing on his bed, pajamas twisted in her haste. Sayoung is unusually quiet, one arm fastening around his neck as he sits up, her thumb in her mouth. He gently pulls it out and says, "Merry Christmas, sweetie."
She doesn't answer. Instead, Sajun shouts, "Merry Christmas, daddy," throwing her arms in the hair and bouncing more enthusiastically. He catches her by the waistband and holds her still, scared she'll fall off and they'll spend the day in the emergency room. "Daddy, daddy, has Santa Claus been?"
He can't help but smile at her obvious excitement. "I don't know," he says, playing innocent. "Why don't you go see?"
She bounces off the bed and hits the floor running. He hears her take the stairs two at a time, although he's told her before not to do that, then her voice shrieking happily. Siwon swings his legs out of bed, but Sayoung is still holding on. When he stands up, she hangs from around his neck. "Urk," he says, reaching around so he can hold her against his waist. He's starting to be a little worried. "Everything okay?" he asks.
"I thought Sungmin-oppa would be here," she whispers into his ear, lisping somewhat through the gap on the top row of her teeth.
"Sungmin-oppa?" he asks, surprised. There had never been any mention of Sungmin staying for Christmas in front of the girls, even when it had potentially been a possibility, since he hadn't wanted to get their hopes up only to break them, so quite why Sayoung thinks Sungmin would have been there, he doesn't know. "Why?"
"Because it's Christmas," she says simply, like that explains everything, and Siwon realises that in her childish way, she's saying that Sungmin should be here because Christmas is a time for family and in her mind, Sungmin is part of their family. He brushes the hair back and kisses her on the forehead.
"He'll be here later on," he says brightly. He starts for the door, bouncing a little as he walks, the excitement of the day catching. "Let's go open your presents first though!"
He thinks about it, however, as he watches them rip wrapping paper off the boxes under the tree. He gets sucked off into a fantasy where Sungmin was there, laughing with him as Sayoung declares the Fairy Princess Barbie the only thing she has ever wanted in her entire life, which is somewhat of an exaggeration but Siwon's too happy that she likes it to even care. He watches her bound around the room, back to her energetic self, and is suddenly very sad that Sungmin isn't here. He'd have liked to have shared this with him. Then he shakes his head, frowning at himself. Sungmin, he reminds himself, has his own friends and family he can spend the day with.
Still, it plays on his mind, and so once he's managed to get the girls dressed in their new outfits (Sajun in a red check dress, Sayoung in pale pink) and is loading them in the car to head to the Church, he sends off a quick text to Sungmin wishing him a Merry Christmas. He gets one back soon after complaining that his roommate, Heechul, is both refusing to go to Church and refusing to wear a hat from one of the crackers. Much as Siwon likes Sungmin's best friend, he's still very glad that he's not having to spend Christmas with him. He's probably more stressful than his parents.
His mother takes one look at the girls - who look perfect - and starts fussing over them, straightening already straight bows and pulling up socks that weren't drooping. He lets her do it, knowing that she'll just be in a bad mood for the rest of the day if he doesn't, and greets his father, who never quite looks like he knows who Siwon is. He sees his mother looking around, as if she's expecting Sungmin to pop up out of the woodwork and humiliate her outside her own Church. "He's not coming," he says heavily. "He's got his own to go to, so don't worry about that."
"I don't know what you're talking about," she sniffs, gathering Sayoung up into her arms. "Did Santa bring you everything you wanted?" she asks, nuzzling into her hair.
"Yes!" Sajun answers for her younger sister. "Santa brought me the Barbie townhouse and a fairy tale book and a Chemistry set!" Which is when his mother gives him a glare and his heart sinks.
"A Chemistry set, Siwon?" she hisses as they're taking their seats. "Honestly! She's a five year old girl!"
"She's interested in science," Siwon says. "It's suitable for her age group and it'll be good for her."
"She's-"
"Mum, if your protests all boil down to the fact that she's a girl, Mum, then I don't want to hear it."
She falls slent, which is all the confirmation that he needs, though she's still scowling at him. He takes his seat on the pews, feeling the start of a stress headache starting. He just has to get through lunch after this and then he can escape home and watch the girls play with their toys and relax in front of the television.
The headache, however, just gets worse after the service, when he finds out that his mother has bought Sajun and Sayoung a pair of ballet shoes. They're overjoyed with them, though perhaps not really understanding what they are - to them, they just look like pretty shoes - but Siwon blinks and then turns to her questioningly. "Mum, they don't do ballet," he points out.
"I know," she says brightly, "which is the second part of my gift. I'm paying for a year's worth of ballet classes!"
"But-" Siwon is torn. On the one hand, it's a generous gift and he's always wanted to let the girls take some form of a dance class, just to see if they'd enjoy it. On the other hand, he can't help but be somewhat suspicious, since everything his mother does has some form of ulterior motive. "Why?"
"Because it will help with their confidence," she says, "and every little girl should know how to dance like a swan."
"Oh," he says, watching Sayoung attempt to float around the room like her idea of a ballerina. She's rather heavy footed. "Well, thanks, Mum. I'm sure they'll love it."
"Well, of course they'll love it," she sniffs. "It's an appropriate gift." He rolls his eyes.
Lunch is rather somber, because his mother doesn't like chatter at the dinner table and his father never says anything anyway, which is probably why his mother forbids talking. He eats well but the girls are, as always, affected by the silence and pick at their food, so as a result there's still half of their meal left when it comes to clearing up. He ushers them into the living room before his mother can chastise them, where they sit on the floor making their ballet shoes tap out dances on the carpet. He offers to help clear up but is told that's not his job. As a result he has to sit through half a Christmas special on television before he's able to say, "Well, we'd better be getting off."
"But it's so soon!" his mother cries. She's right, of course, it's only just after three, but he's been thinking yearningly of the bottle of wine he has in the fridge for the past hour and a bit and he doesn't think he can take much more.
"Yes, well," he says, getting their coats from the hallway, the girls waiting by his legs, clearly happy to be leaving too, "we've got things to do. Toys to play with. I've got people coming over."
"Is one of those people him?" she asks coldly.
"Sungmin is coming over, yes."
"Oh, Siwon!" she cries, sounding almost heartbroken; it would be more effective if he didn't know it was put on. "It's supposed to be a time for family, not - not flings!"
"Mum, I-" He doesn't say what he almost said, not wanting to let her know just how badly he feels that Sungmin is part of his family now. The whole day has felt strangely empty without him, like Siwon is missing a limb. He doesn't want to give her that much of an insight, though, so instead he says, "I'll call you, Mum. Have a good night."
He kisses her goodbye and then turns into the cold air, the sun already beginning to set. By the time they pull into the drive, it's completely dark, their breath puffing white. He ushers the girls up to their rooms to get changed into something warmer and more comfortable, makes sure that the heating it on, and takes a couple of painkillers while the kettle boils. When they come back downstairs - Sayoung having misunderstood "comfortable" as she's wearing her fairy wings - they pile on the sofa, complete with their dolls, and watch The Wizard of Oz.
Just after Dorothy meets the Scarecrow, the doorbell rings. He untangles himself from the mess of little girls and plastic limbs and pulls open the door to reveal who he assumes to be Sungmin from the nose. It's hard to tell, though, because he's bundled up so tight; his hat is pulled low over his face and his scarf pulled up over his mouth. He's covered in a fine layer of fresh snow. "Hi," he says.
"Did you walk here?" Siwon asks, aghast, pulling Sungmin inside and dusting the snow off him. "You were supposed to call if you couldn't get a taxi!"
"No, it's okay, I didn't walk all the way." Sungmin begins unwinding his scarf, which seems like it could take a while. "Kyuhyun dropped me at the end of the street. He was picking Heechul up to take him to the party Zhou Mi is having." He pauses, pulling his hat from his head and running a hand through it in an attempt to get rid of his hat hair. "Well, I suppose it's Kyuhyun's party too, since he lives there too, but Zhou Mi's the one organizing it."
Siwon hesitated, hanging Sungmin's coat up. "Zhou Mi's having a party? You don't want to go? You could call Kyuhyun, ask him to come get you. I mean, it's not like we're doing anything exciting. We're just watching The Wizard of Oz."
"I love that film." Sungmin smiles, wrapping his arms around Siwon's waist and stepping closer. "Stop worrying. I want to be here."
"Oh," Siwon says. Sungmin's lingering hat hair is the cutest thing he's ever seen. He leans down, kisses him, his warm lips to Sungmin's cold pair. "Hi."
"Hi back."
They smile at each other, then Sungmin sticks his cold hands up Siwon's shirt, and Siwon lets out a decidedly unmanly yell and Sungmin dissolves into giggles. The girls come to see what the noise is over, interrupting their moment as Sayoung launches herself at Sungmin, shrieking his name. Sungmin lifts her up, kissing her cheek. Without even needing to be asked, she starts telling him, at triple speed, about their day and how much she missed him and whether he'll watch the film with her and if he's sleeping over that night. Sajun interjects with her own happy shouts. It takes Siwon quite a while to get them to calm down and back through into the living room. Sajun cuddles against his left side, Sungmin's head rests against his right shoulder, and Sayoung sits in Sungmin's lap.
"I swear," Siwon mutters, just before they gets sucked back into the film, "they love you more than they love me."
"Aww," Sungmin says, and kisses his cheek.
When the girls are tucked up in bed, worn out after the day, Siwon lies against the arm of the sofa, Sungmin between his legs, stroking his hand up and down his side. Some old black and white film plays out on the television screen, though Siwon isn't paying attention; Sungmin is the one with an interest in those kind of films. "I'm glad you're here," he says. "I mean, I know you had your own day, with your friends and-"
"Next year," Sungmin interrupts, "I want to come to Church with you and go for lunch with you and just...spend the day with you." He twists his head around so he can smile at Siwon. "It didn't feel right, somehow. I love my friends, and I had a good day, but it just wasn't the same."
Siwon swallows, trying to clear the sudden lump in his throat. He isn't sure if it's because of the sentiment or whether it's because Sungmin had said next year. "Okay," he says, voice quiet. "I'd love that. Honestly, I've just been wanting this for the entire day. Plus, Sayoung asked where you were this morning, I don't think she'd have any objections."
Sungmin stretches up and kisses him, with the end result that before long, Siwon is pressing him into the cushions of the sofa, a hand curled against the base of his skull, while Sungmin's hands pull at the hem of his t-shirt. Before he lets them get too carried away, however, Siwon pulls away, breaks the kiss, and says, "No, first, I've got a present for you."
"Oh, me too," says Sungmin, looking a little surprised. "I've got some for the girls, too."
"...You didn't have to do that," Siwon says, the rush of affection warm through him.
"I wanted to. I can't believe I forgot about it." He's still got one hand on Siwon's shirt hem. He slides his hand up against his stomach and lets his fingers dance over Siwon's abs. "I guess I got distracted."
Siwon groans and pushes him away, batting his hands a little. "Not the time," he says. "I have to give you this. Give me a minute."
He takes the stairs as quickly as he dares, tip-toeing past the bedroom doors, grabbing the gift from his room and then back downstairs. Sungmin is holding a box of his own on his lap, looking exceedingly nervous, biting his bottom lip again. His back is almost comically straight. "This is for you," he says, holding out the box before Siwon has even sat down next to him. Siwon takes it from him, smiling. His obvious worry is helping Siwon relax. He takes a seat next to him, making a show of shaking it next to his ear. It's quite heavy.
"Heechul thought it was stupid," Sungmin says. "But then I think that was just because Heechul resents money being spent on people other than him. Zhou Mi scolded because he didn't think it was romantic enough."
"What did he get Kyuhyun?" Siwon asks, picking at the edge of the wrapping paper and trying to imagine what Kyuhyun would do if confronted with something that Zhou Mi considered romantic.
"A karaoke machine," Sungmin says, "but he's had it specially programmed to only play soppy love songs so I don't think Kyuhyun is going to be that happy." Then, Siwon ripping a thin line of paper off, he snaps. "Siwon, just open it, and put me out of my misery, please."
"Okay, okay," Siwon laughs, finally starting properly.
He pulls the paper off carefully, trying to not ruin it in a show of haste. Inside is a shoe box, and as he lifts the lid off to reveal a pair of running shoes that he knows, from seeing them in a shop window, are pretty expensive, Sungmin says, "I thought, since you'd been saying that your shoes were getting a bit threadbare, I could get you a new pair. I know it's not exactly a romantic first Christmas present but they're supposed to be pretty good."
"They're supposed to be the best," Siwon says, turning his stare from the shoes to Sungmin's face. "Sungmin, you can't afford these."
"Sure I can," Sungmin says brightly. "I mean, it took up most of a paycheck but Heechul agreed to cover the rent this month since he was filled with the Christmas spirit. And possibly I bribed him with a bottle of rum."
"Thank you," Siwon says, not really sure what else to say. It's probably the first time in a fair few years, possibly since he was a child, that he's been given a present with some thought in it. His presents, ever since he turned eighteen, have been variations on the socks and tie package. He puts the shoe he'd picked up back in the box and said, "Are you sure?"
"Siwon, I wouldn't have given you them if I wasn't sure." Sungmin holds out his hands, practically bouncing now that he knows that his own gift had gone down well. "Is that mine? Can I keep the bow? I want to glue it to Zhou Mi's hair."
Laughing, Siwon hands his own larger parcel over, slightly squishy and rustling. Sungmin doesn't waste time trying to work out what it is; he unwraps it quickly, trying to be careful with the paper like Siwon had but ultimately failing. He pauses when a small section of it is revealed. He recognises it immediately, and sucks his breath in with a gasp. "Siwon, you didn't," he says, eyes going wide.
"Why wouldn't I?" Siwon asks, slightly too smug, slightly too intrigued by the glee on Sungmin's face. He could probably do this every day if he could see that expression.
"Never mind me not being able to afford those, you certainly can't afford this, not with the girls." Sungmin pulls the backpack from the mess of paper, holding it up so he can look at it better. It's pale pink leather, with the Dolce and Gabbana logo done in silver across the front below the zip. Sungmin had pointed it out one day in a department store when they'd been shopping for new jeans for Sajun, joking that when he was a famous song writer, the first thing he'd buy would be that. Siwon has saved him the trouble.
Siwon shrugs. "I saved up," he says. He taps the bag with a knuckle. "Open it."
Sungmin does so slowly, still muttering about how it was totally over the top as a present. The zip pulled smoothly and he pulled out some books, turning them over so he can read the covers. "Are these-?"
Siwon takes one of them, flipping through until he can get to a certain page. "Just some sheet music," he says. "It was hard to find the books with your favourite songs in them. Harder still to get Heechul to tell what your favourite songs are." He grins. "I had to bribe him myself."
"He's just bitter and lonely," Sungmin says, flipping through the books. "Siwon, honestly, this is - I'm not going to cry but it was a close call for a second."
"It's just sheet music," Siwon laughs.
"Don't ruin it," Sungmin says. He puts the books back into the bag and lays it reverantly by the side of the sofa. Then he turns to Siwon, fingers curling back around the hem of his t-shirt, pulling it up so that it bunches somewhat under his arms. He leans it to kiss Siwon, as he trails his fingers down his stomach and then starts pulling the button on his jeans through the button hole. "Now see," he murmurs, Siwon tugging him into his lap, "this is why I'm glad I'm not at Zhou Mi's party."
Siwon wakes the next morning to an empty bed. He touches the other pillow but it's long gone cold. He squints one eye at the clock and is shocked to see that it's after ten. He expected there to be girls bounding in at seven, just like they always do on days where he's really allowed to lie in. He'd also expected Sungmin to be there; Sungmin isn't really a morning person and so he's surprised that he's even awake, never mind apparently up, especially after a rather late night the night before.
He rolls onto his back, stretching out all his limbs. He's just able to make out noise from downstairs, the girls laughing and shouting something, and Sungmin's voice joining in. He smiles slowly, and takes his time getting up, pulling his robe on and ducking into the bathroom to brush his teeth before he heads downstairs. They're in the living room, Sajun with a remote for the new remote controlled car that Sungmin is holding. Sayoung is dressed in a new fairy outfit to match the wings she's had for a couple of months now.
She bounces up to him, arms upstretched. He gathers her up, and she kisses his cheek. "Look, Daddy!" she says, a little too loud for how close she is to his ears. "Santa forgot some of our presents but Sungmin-oppa brought them for us!"
"Wow!" says Siwon, giving Sungmin a grin over Sayoung's head. He grins back, sitting cross legged, pajama pants pulled up to reveal bare feet. Siwon knows he should be shocked to find that he's even attracted to his toes but he's not any more. He's getting used to this sort of thing. He puts Sayoung down and she goes wafting off, twirling her skirt from left to right. Sungmin hands Sajun the car and stands up, walking over to Siwon to give him a quick kiss.
"Good morning," he says.
"Seriously," Siwon says, "you didn't have to-"
"I wanted to," Sungmin says. He slips his arms around Siwon's waist and gives his ass a discreet pat. "Should I make us some coffee?"
He makes to pull away to go through to the kitchen, but Siwon catches his wrist and pulls him flush against him. "You remember how you asked about my wife?" Sungmin nods, a little apprehensive. "I have never loved anyone the way I love you," Siwon says earnestly.
"Christ," Sungmin says, "I only offered to make coffee."