Fic: The Ghost and His Keeper [Michael/Adam] Part VI
Part V
PART VI
Raphael leaves on a Friday.
Adam knows this because he can keep track of time now. The blur and confusion of eternities spent in the Cage messing him up is fading. It's not completely gone, but it's fading enough.
He also knows this because Raphael comes over to say goodbye herself.
Adam isn't expecting it. He still remembers how his last meeting with an awake Raphael went. And well Raphael for some weird reason reminds him of Zachariah, which Adam knows is unfair to her, but he can't help the association. Also, he's the last person he'd expected her to say goodbye too. Or even talk too, considering the fact that she hates him.
“It's come to my knowledge that you offered me safe haven while I was injured,” is how she greets him while he's walking home from work, appearing in-step with him. It makes Adam jump, before realising it's her.
“Uh yeah. It wasn't a problem though. You're Michael's sister, and wait are you all right enough to be up?”
Raphael levels a glare at him, which promptly makes him swallow. “We are not like you. We heal faster.”
“Gabriel said it'll take a long time.”
“Gabriel underestimates me.”
“Right. Okay,” because honestly Adam has nothing to reply to that. All he's heard about Raphael is from Gabriel and Michael.
“I came to thank you for what you did, before I left. I don't like being in debt.” She's holding something out to him, something long and wrapped in cloth.
“Uh.”
“Take it.” She says. Well more like orders it with and impatient growl that sounds more like a thunderclap.
“Ma'am, yes Ma'am.” The words are out of his mouth before he even realises it, but apparently it must amuse Raphael a little because he's pretty sure he saw the corners of her mouth twitch. It's gone immediately though.
“It might come to be of use. Part of my debt to you is cleared.” She leaves after that, gone as quietly and in the blink of a second, just like she'd arrived. Adam doesn't bother with trying to figure it out as he continues on his way home.
Later he finds out that Raphael left without a word to anyone else, except him. Gabriel and Michael stare - or rather glare - at him when he mentions it and shows them what Raphael gave him, which apparently is Michael's angelic blade.
~*~
“Are you still mad she told me and not you?” Adam asks over his book, stretching out in bed, when Michael is still being a little on the fidgety ghost side after Raphael left.
“We're her brothers.”
“Stellar job you did at being brotherly.” Adam snarks, before he catches the hurt flit across Michael's features and realising what he said. What it meant to Michael. “Shit man, sorry, I didn't mean it like that.”
“No, but you're right. I've wronged her in my selfishness, and the others too.”
“Look, she doesn't hate you. She just needs to be on her own for a bit. She wants to heal on her own, and you need to give her that.” Michael sighs, and Adam sighs setting his book down on the bedside table. “It'll work out, trust me. I know you don't like it. You don't have to like it. But you have to accept it. That's the beauty of being human. Frustration in heaps and bounds. Now, come here my grumpy ghost. I need to be in for work early tomorrow so I'm turning in.”
~*~
Gabriel manages to track down Raphael a few months later. She doesn't come back with him. Apparently, she let herself be found.
“She's trying to find a way to break your curse, and that I'm not supposed to come after her again.” Gabriel informs them. “And she said if I tried to come after her again, she'd rip my Grace out and feed it to Hell-hounds.”
“Sounds like she's doing better already.” Michael says.
“Told you guys she needed to be on her own for a bit.” Adam butts in, setting a coffee mug in front of Gabriel, and Gabriel's grinning at his words, sad and fond at the same time.
“Just so you know, I think Michael wants to ruffle your hair right about now, and I know this because his Grace is doing that weird 'comfort the little brother thing' inside me, and yes it's weird. So unless you want hugs or something enjoy your damn coffee and stop pouting.”
“Are you always a little bitch?” Gabriel asks. But he's back to snarky and not his sad guilty self, so Adam ignores Michael's scoff, and counts it as a win.
“Only on Mondays, because seriously, fuck Mondays.”
“Today's a Thursday.” Michael corrects him.
“Well, fuck Thursdays too, then.”
~*~
Michael corners Adam later that day just as he's coming out of the shower, leaning into Adam's space. Adam knows what's coming before Michael starts shaking. This has been becoming a frequent thing between them.
“Hey,” he starts voice soft, “this is not your fault. Again, this is not your fault.”
“It shouldn't be like this. Raphael should be healing, not out searching for a way to fix me. Fixing my messes. I should be taking care of her. I should be able to take of you, instead of being this helpless thing.”
“But that's what she wants to do, and you can't take that from her.” Adam chooses to focus on the Raphael part of this conversation because the other part is tedious. The other part gets them both into long arguments and he doesn't want that right now.
Michael sighs, pushing his ethereal head into the space between Adam's neck and shoulder. Adam likes to pretend he can actually feel it's weight, feel Michael's hair tickling his chin. Michael can touch things normally, but Adam only rarely, and Adam just goes through him. “I don't have to like it.” He finally says.
“No, you don't have too, but we have to deal. Come on, let's go to bed.”
Michael laughs, soft and broken. “You say it like I'm real.” And the One day you'll be a real boy hangs unsaid in between them, and Adam really hates himself for that joke.
“You are. I will argue about this until I'm blue in the face. Don't test me. Now seriously, stop sulking and come to bed. We can plan that Venice trip for when we finally fix us.” Adam says firmly, ignoring Michael's defeated sigh.
~*~
Of course that doesn't stop Michael from sulking. Of course it doesn't.
“Do I have to put on a strip show or something, for you to get distracted and just let Raphael be?” Adam asks one day sounding annoyed.
“Kinky. Is this your new way of greeting guests?” It's Gabriel's voice from behind him, and it makes Adam jump.
“One, no doing that. Two, that offer was not for you. Three, you're the sensible one, please knock some sense into him.”
“The fact that you're considering putting on strip shows for my brother should not be amusing.”
“Eh, I'm in a monogamous relationship with an archangel turned ghost. I have to get my rocks off somehow.” If this was any other time, Adam would be worried about this, because there is something seriously wrong with him for having archangels in his house. But now this is normal for him and Gabriel. Sometimes, Gabriel even flirts with him to annoy Michael.
“Again kinky.”
Adam rolls his eyes, and heads to the kitchen to go make them coffee. Sure Gabriel can magic it up, he does magic it up sometimes, but mostly he plays by human rules whenever he's over. That and Adam's heading for the kitchen is basically him giving the brothers space to talk privately. “I'm still counting on you talking sense into him.”
When he gets back with coffee Gabriel and Michael are arguing over something. Michael is frowning. “You don't have too,” he says.
“Nope, I'm doing it.”
“Doing what?” Adam asks. He won't mind if they don't answer him, it's just become his way of announcing he's back in the room. Him having Michael's Grace while in the house which is still fortified for anything supernatural wanting to attack it, has made Gabriel's honing in on him fuzzy or something.
“Rebuilding Heaven.” Gabriel answers and Adam almost drops the coffee.
“I thought, you said that the angels were gone? I mean Castiel took them out and...”
“There are survivors. The younger ones. They're lost, and they've started coming out of hiding only now. It's better to have them in one place before they get ideas or go nuclear. Besides Raphael is covering the free the curse part with you two, and I've exhausted all my leads. And it'd be good to have something for her to come home too, when she returns.”
Michael makes a sound, Adam can't figure out whether it's frustration, protest or both. But Adam on the other hand is all for the idea. There are things Gabriel and him have spoken about, brothers, and family, and being in the others shadow and never feeling good enough, worthy enough, and wanting to get away. And while Gabriel tells Adam that he reminds him of a younger Raphael, back before Lucifer fell, when Raphael was sarcastic, and funny, and a mother hen rather than what she became; Adam thinks he's more like Gabriel. He'd not like to leave anything unfinished either.
“It's a good idea.” Adam hazards, wincing internally when he feels Michael's betrayed look.
“See, even your boyfriend is on my side.”
~*~
“I still think it's a bad idea.” Michael says as Adam is cooking dinner.
“Yes, you've been on about it for days. Days, Michael. Maybe even weeks. I don't even know any more. I know you think it's a bad idea.” Adam frowns as he stares at the sauce he's making like it personally offends him. “And I think I've done something wrong, ugh. The colour's off.”
“Adam.”
“Give me sec.”
“Adam.”
“Yes Michael, I know you don't like this, but Gabriel made a point, and can we just drop this already?” Adam grumbles turning around before his eyes go wide. Michael isn't translucent any more. Or rather he's sort of becoming less and less translucent, and wow. It's like watching CGI happen in real life. “I'll call Gabriel. You should probably go put some clothes on.” Adam says, a little dazed because he cannot see through Michael any more. Michael is real and solid, and naked and solid too, and Adam is too focused on the solid bit to enjoy the naked bit.
~*~
Gabriel and Raphael - who'd showed up out of nowhere, and sent a swift look towards Adam that shut him up before he could ask - stare at Michael, who's sitting on the couch looking exactly like he did the last time this happened. Awkward in his skin, and staring at his hands in wonder.
“He suddenly got like this?” Gabriel asks.
“Yep.” Adam replies, and he wishes he could do better.
“When did this last happen?”
“Two year ago. Exact. To this date.” Michael answers this time. “I was back to my other state by dawn the next morning.”
Adam hadn't even realised it's been two years already. “I thought it's only been a few months.”
“No Adam, it's been two years.”
Adam frowns. He knows his sense of time is still off, but he's sure it's been a couple of months.
“How long has it been since you can't keep track of time?” Raphael's asking, and pulling Adam out of his thoughts. It's the first time she's spoken all night.
“Ever, since I got out of the Cage. It really messed up my sense of time. Why?” Raphael says nothing further, doesn't answer him, but Adam connects the dots on his own. “You think it has something to do with this?”
She nods, gaze still flitting back between Michael and him. “I think I know what this is.”
Adam doesn't like the look she has on her face. In fact that look is the look that says that bad news is about to be had. “It's permanent isn't it?” It shouldn't even be a question. Adam already knows the answer to it.
“Yes. Michael's Grace is tied to your soul. It's why you're losing time. You perceive it like how an angel would. The only reason he's human right now, is because you're diffusing enough Grace for him to catch and collect to attain this form for a while.”
Adam sighs, sitting next to Michael. “There's really no way to fix this?”
“There is way to break it. If the host is eliminated, Michael can get his Grace back.”
“No.” Michael's reaction is immediate. His hand reaches out for Adam's curling around it. “I'm not killing Adam.”
“There's no other way. You surrendered your Grace to him when you bowed to him. You tied your Grace to his soul. The only way to get it back is to eliminate his soul.”
“No.” Michael says again, and Adam realising that he's about to start shaking, wraps an arm around him. He's thankful that neither Gabriel or Raphael even raise an eyebrow when Michael leans into the embrace tucking his head under Adam's chin.
“So what do we do now?” Adam asks quietly, rubbing circles into Michael's back. It should feel strange that this doesn't feel strange. He's used to his hands going through Michael.
“There should be another way.” Raphael offers. She doesn't sound happy about it. Adam really can't even blame her for it. He knows that she doesn't like him one bit for so many different reasons. If he were in her place, he'd probably be worst. But he also realises what this is. Her own way of saying that yes she's okay with whatever Michael and him have, and it makes him smile at her. “It'll take me some time.” She doesn't even wait for Adam to start, let alone finish thanking her before leaving.
“I should get going too.” Gabriel says. “I've just started rounding off the herds. Can't leave the kids alone to play upstairs. Who knows what they'll do.”
Adam snorts, and waves off Gabriel when he vanishes, before turning his attention back to Michael, hoping to lift his bad mood. “So, we have a few more hours until you're back to Casper form for however long.”
Michael chuckles, apparently getting what Adam was insinuating, and leaning up to kiss him. “Bed?”
“Bed.” Adam confirms, pressing their foreheads together. “I intend to make full use of the next few hours for cuddling.”
~*~
It's not perfect. Heck, there's no way a fucked up situation like theirs would be perfect. It's not how Adam would've imagined spending his life after he got out of Hell.
Gabriel comes over often grumbling about Heaven and the angels, and finishes all the coffee in the house. Raphael comes over less often. There's still no fix other than killing Adam which Michael refuses to do. She still hates him, but she hopefully will come around. Eventually. Maybe. She has been glaring at him less so Adam's thinking he's growing on her.
He still has bad days, and still has good days. His sense of time is still shot. He absolutely sucks at doing the budget. Nanny eventually passes away and Adam is the one to bury her, because she and Kristin never made up.
But, he has Michael, even if it's not the way he wanted Michael, he has him, spectral for all but one day every two years. Here and now, he at least has this, and that's enough.
-x-x-x-
There is a story Gabriel tells the younger angels when teaching them about Free Will in the new era. It goes like this:
Once upon a time there was a boy, and a ghost.
The boy - Adam Milligan - wasn't normal any more due to various reason, but then again he'd never truly been normal to begin with. No one born into the Winchester family lineage was. He was supposed to be dead, but just like his brothers, death didn't stick to him either, and instead he'd now housed the Grace of an angel. The ghost was really the archangel Michael who lost his Grace to the boy. Adam was his Cage, and hence Michael haunted him.
They had a history even before that. One that involved Revelations and prophecies and the old Apocalypse, and how they all went wrong, and spanned infinities in Hell.
They were cursed.
And most importantly they were in love.
It was needless to say, a recipe for tragedy.
They lived together. Not in some tiny nowhere corner of the world barely accessible. No, they lived in a simple old house, in a still small American town. They lived in the house Adam grew up in.
There were two cups for two people, in the kitchen, too much food made daily for one living person to eat, too much of everything for one person to use. There was a room that belonged to the boy's late mother, that was as sacred as the throne room of heaven, kept untouched and preserved as years went by, even as the rest of the house showed signs of ageing and being lived in. There were books that piled up, with quickly fading paper, whose words were read out loud every afternoon. There was a roof that rattled and always seemed to need repairing. There were people who came and went into their lives. Friends, family, acquaintances, others.
There were fights and there were soft words. There were days they wouldn't look, wouldn't acknowledge one another. And there were days when both pretended that they could touch could feel the other, and invaded each other's personal space, curled up around the other, as if to become one single being. There were proclamations of love, promises, post-it notes left on walls. And there were threats to leave, rock salt boundaries barring entry into rooms, and rattling and shaking furniture that accompanied raised voices which would be followed up with broken china.
The days would pass as they were want to do: slow, slower, fast, fast, faster, slow-fast-slow. They all built up to a crescendo, keeping both so tightly would and driving them to the very edge.
There were phantom touches. Then there were those few hours every two years were the phantom touches weren't so phantom. When the ghost would become flesh and blood until sunrise, and the boy who wasn't a boy any more but a man, took him to bed, indulged, and fell off that edge they'd drove themselves too. And then there were those few precious moment after when wrapped up in each other while waiting for morning, the man would hold the archangel a little tighter, firmer, as if it would stop him from turning into a spectre again.
But it wouldn't.
And the process would start all over again, repeat itself and build up until they got another few hours after another two years.
There was no happy ending.
But that was okay, as Adam said, because the ending was theirs, one they chose.
Besides they had all of the time in the world to make it a happy ending.
~fin~
PART VI
Raphael leaves on a Friday.
Adam knows this because he can keep track of time now. The blur and confusion of eternities spent in the Cage messing him up is fading. It's not completely gone, but it's fading enough.
He also knows this because Raphael comes over to say goodbye herself.
Adam isn't expecting it. He still remembers how his last meeting with an awake Raphael went. And well Raphael for some weird reason reminds him of Zachariah, which Adam knows is unfair to her, but he can't help the association. Also, he's the last person he'd expected her to say goodbye too. Or even talk too, considering the fact that she hates him.
“It's come to my knowledge that you offered me safe haven while I was injured,” is how she greets him while he's walking home from work, appearing in-step with him. It makes Adam jump, before realising it's her.
“Uh yeah. It wasn't a problem though. You're Michael's sister, and wait are you all right enough to be up?”
Raphael levels a glare at him, which promptly makes him swallow. “We are not like you. We heal faster.”
“Gabriel said it'll take a long time.”
“Gabriel underestimates me.”
“Right. Okay,” because honestly Adam has nothing to reply to that. All he's heard about Raphael is from Gabriel and Michael.
“I came to thank you for what you did, before I left. I don't like being in debt.” She's holding something out to him, something long and wrapped in cloth.
“Uh.”
“Take it.” She says. Well more like orders it with and impatient growl that sounds more like a thunderclap.
“Ma'am, yes Ma'am.” The words are out of his mouth before he even realises it, but apparently it must amuse Raphael a little because he's pretty sure he saw the corners of her mouth twitch. It's gone immediately though.
“It might come to be of use. Part of my debt to you is cleared.” She leaves after that, gone as quietly and in the blink of a second, just like she'd arrived. Adam doesn't bother with trying to figure it out as he continues on his way home.
Later he finds out that Raphael left without a word to anyone else, except him. Gabriel and Michael stare - or rather glare - at him when he mentions it and shows them what Raphael gave him, which apparently is Michael's angelic blade.
~*~
“Are you still mad she told me and not you?” Adam asks over his book, stretching out in bed, when Michael is still being a little on the fidgety ghost side after Raphael left.
“We're her brothers.”
“Stellar job you did at being brotherly.” Adam snarks, before he catches the hurt flit across Michael's features and realising what he said. What it meant to Michael. “Shit man, sorry, I didn't mean it like that.”
“No, but you're right. I've wronged her in my selfishness, and the others too.”
“Look, she doesn't hate you. She just needs to be on her own for a bit. She wants to heal on her own, and you need to give her that.” Michael sighs, and Adam sighs setting his book down on the bedside table. “It'll work out, trust me. I know you don't like it. You don't have to like it. But you have to accept it. That's the beauty of being human. Frustration in heaps and bounds. Now, come here my grumpy ghost. I need to be in for work early tomorrow so I'm turning in.”
~*~
Gabriel manages to track down Raphael a few months later. She doesn't come back with him. Apparently, she let herself be found.
“She's trying to find a way to break your curse, and that I'm not supposed to come after her again.” Gabriel informs them. “And she said if I tried to come after her again, she'd rip my Grace out and feed it to Hell-hounds.”
“Sounds like she's doing better already.” Michael says.
“Told you guys she needed to be on her own for a bit.” Adam butts in, setting a coffee mug in front of Gabriel, and Gabriel's grinning at his words, sad and fond at the same time.
“Just so you know, I think Michael wants to ruffle your hair right about now, and I know this because his Grace is doing that weird 'comfort the little brother thing' inside me, and yes it's weird. So unless you want hugs or something enjoy your damn coffee and stop pouting.”
“Are you always a little bitch?” Gabriel asks. But he's back to snarky and not his sad guilty self, so Adam ignores Michael's scoff, and counts it as a win.
“Only on Mondays, because seriously, fuck Mondays.”
“Today's a Thursday.” Michael corrects him.
“Well, fuck Thursdays too, then.”
~*~
Michael corners Adam later that day just as he's coming out of the shower, leaning into Adam's space. Adam knows what's coming before Michael starts shaking. This has been becoming a frequent thing between them.
“Hey,” he starts voice soft, “this is not your fault. Again, this is not your fault.”
“It shouldn't be like this. Raphael should be healing, not out searching for a way to fix me. Fixing my messes. I should be taking care of her. I should be able to take of you, instead of being this helpless thing.”
“But that's what she wants to do, and you can't take that from her.” Adam chooses to focus on the Raphael part of this conversation because the other part is tedious. The other part gets them both into long arguments and he doesn't want that right now.
Michael sighs, pushing his ethereal head into the space between Adam's neck and shoulder. Adam likes to pretend he can actually feel it's weight, feel Michael's hair tickling his chin. Michael can touch things normally, but Adam only rarely, and Adam just goes through him. “I don't have to like it.” He finally says.
“No, you don't have too, but we have to deal. Come on, let's go to bed.”
Michael laughs, soft and broken. “You say it like I'm real.” And the One day you'll be a real boy hangs unsaid in between them, and Adam really hates himself for that joke.
“You are. I will argue about this until I'm blue in the face. Don't test me. Now seriously, stop sulking and come to bed. We can plan that Venice trip for when we finally fix us.” Adam says firmly, ignoring Michael's defeated sigh.
~*~
Of course that doesn't stop Michael from sulking. Of course it doesn't.
“Do I have to put on a strip show or something, for you to get distracted and just let Raphael be?” Adam asks one day sounding annoyed.
“Kinky. Is this your new way of greeting guests?” It's Gabriel's voice from behind him, and it makes Adam jump.
“One, no doing that. Two, that offer was not for you. Three, you're the sensible one, please knock some sense into him.”
“The fact that you're considering putting on strip shows for my brother should not be amusing.”
“Eh, I'm in a monogamous relationship with an archangel turned ghost. I have to get my rocks off somehow.” If this was any other time, Adam would be worried about this, because there is something seriously wrong with him for having archangels in his house. But now this is normal for him and Gabriel. Sometimes, Gabriel even flirts with him to annoy Michael.
“Again kinky.”
Adam rolls his eyes, and heads to the kitchen to go make them coffee. Sure Gabriel can magic it up, he does magic it up sometimes, but mostly he plays by human rules whenever he's over. That and Adam's heading for the kitchen is basically him giving the brothers space to talk privately. “I'm still counting on you talking sense into him.”
When he gets back with coffee Gabriel and Michael are arguing over something. Michael is frowning. “You don't have too,” he says.
“Nope, I'm doing it.”
“Doing what?” Adam asks. He won't mind if they don't answer him, it's just become his way of announcing he's back in the room. Him having Michael's Grace while in the house which is still fortified for anything supernatural wanting to attack it, has made Gabriel's honing in on him fuzzy or something.
“Rebuilding Heaven.” Gabriel answers and Adam almost drops the coffee.
“I thought, you said that the angels were gone? I mean Castiel took them out and...”
“There are survivors. The younger ones. They're lost, and they've started coming out of hiding only now. It's better to have them in one place before they get ideas or go nuclear. Besides Raphael is covering the free the curse part with you two, and I've exhausted all my leads. And it'd be good to have something for her to come home too, when she returns.”
Michael makes a sound, Adam can't figure out whether it's frustration, protest or both. But Adam on the other hand is all for the idea. There are things Gabriel and him have spoken about, brothers, and family, and being in the others shadow and never feeling good enough, worthy enough, and wanting to get away. And while Gabriel tells Adam that he reminds him of a younger Raphael, back before Lucifer fell, when Raphael was sarcastic, and funny, and a mother hen rather than what she became; Adam thinks he's more like Gabriel. He'd not like to leave anything unfinished either.
“It's a good idea.” Adam hazards, wincing internally when he feels Michael's betrayed look.
“See, even your boyfriend is on my side.”
~*~
“I still think it's a bad idea.” Michael says as Adam is cooking dinner.
“Yes, you've been on about it for days. Days, Michael. Maybe even weeks. I don't even know any more. I know you think it's a bad idea.” Adam frowns as he stares at the sauce he's making like it personally offends him. “And I think I've done something wrong, ugh. The colour's off.”
“Adam.”
“Give me sec.”
“Adam.”
“Yes Michael, I know you don't like this, but Gabriel made a point, and can we just drop this already?” Adam grumbles turning around before his eyes go wide. Michael isn't translucent any more. Or rather he's sort of becoming less and less translucent, and wow. It's like watching CGI happen in real life. “I'll call Gabriel. You should probably go put some clothes on.” Adam says, a little dazed because he cannot see through Michael any more. Michael is real and solid, and naked and solid too, and Adam is too focused on the solid bit to enjoy the naked bit.
~*~
Gabriel and Raphael - who'd showed up out of nowhere, and sent a swift look towards Adam that shut him up before he could ask - stare at Michael, who's sitting on the couch looking exactly like he did the last time this happened. Awkward in his skin, and staring at his hands in wonder.
“He suddenly got like this?” Gabriel asks.
“Yep.” Adam replies, and he wishes he could do better.
“When did this last happen?”
“Two year ago. Exact. To this date.” Michael answers this time. “I was back to my other state by dawn the next morning.”
Adam hadn't even realised it's been two years already. “I thought it's only been a few months.”
“No Adam, it's been two years.”
Adam frowns. He knows his sense of time is still off, but he's sure it's been a couple of months.
“How long has it been since you can't keep track of time?” Raphael's asking, and pulling Adam out of his thoughts. It's the first time she's spoken all night.
“Ever, since I got out of the Cage. It really messed up my sense of time. Why?” Raphael says nothing further, doesn't answer him, but Adam connects the dots on his own. “You think it has something to do with this?”
She nods, gaze still flitting back between Michael and him. “I think I know what this is.”
Adam doesn't like the look she has on her face. In fact that look is the look that says that bad news is about to be had. “It's permanent isn't it?” It shouldn't even be a question. Adam already knows the answer to it.
“Yes. Michael's Grace is tied to your soul. It's why you're losing time. You perceive it like how an angel would. The only reason he's human right now, is because you're diffusing enough Grace for him to catch and collect to attain this form for a while.”
Adam sighs, sitting next to Michael. “There's really no way to fix this?”
“There is way to break it. If the host is eliminated, Michael can get his Grace back.”
“No.” Michael's reaction is immediate. His hand reaches out for Adam's curling around it. “I'm not killing Adam.”
“There's no other way. You surrendered your Grace to him when you bowed to him. You tied your Grace to his soul. The only way to get it back is to eliminate his soul.”
“No.” Michael says again, and Adam realising that he's about to start shaking, wraps an arm around him. He's thankful that neither Gabriel or Raphael even raise an eyebrow when Michael leans into the embrace tucking his head under Adam's chin.
“So what do we do now?” Adam asks quietly, rubbing circles into Michael's back. It should feel strange that this doesn't feel strange. He's used to his hands going through Michael.
“There should be another way.” Raphael offers. She doesn't sound happy about it. Adam really can't even blame her for it. He knows that she doesn't like him one bit for so many different reasons. If he were in her place, he'd probably be worst. But he also realises what this is. Her own way of saying that yes she's okay with whatever Michael and him have, and it makes him smile at her. “It'll take me some time.” She doesn't even wait for Adam to start, let alone finish thanking her before leaving.
“I should get going too.” Gabriel says. “I've just started rounding off the herds. Can't leave the kids alone to play upstairs. Who knows what they'll do.”
Adam snorts, and waves off Gabriel when he vanishes, before turning his attention back to Michael, hoping to lift his bad mood. “So, we have a few more hours until you're back to Casper form for however long.”
Michael chuckles, apparently getting what Adam was insinuating, and leaning up to kiss him. “Bed?”
“Bed.” Adam confirms, pressing their foreheads together. “I intend to make full use of the next few hours for cuddling.”
~*~
It's not perfect. Heck, there's no way a fucked up situation like theirs would be perfect. It's not how Adam would've imagined spending his life after he got out of Hell.
Gabriel comes over often grumbling about Heaven and the angels, and finishes all the coffee in the house. Raphael comes over less often. There's still no fix other than killing Adam which Michael refuses to do. She still hates him, but she hopefully will come around. Eventually. Maybe. She has been glaring at him less so Adam's thinking he's growing on her.
He still has bad days, and still has good days. His sense of time is still shot. He absolutely sucks at doing the budget. Nanny eventually passes away and Adam is the one to bury her, because she and Kristin never made up.
But, he has Michael, even if it's not the way he wanted Michael, he has him, spectral for all but one day every two years. Here and now, he at least has this, and that's enough.
-x-x-x-
There is a story Gabriel tells the younger angels when teaching them about Free Will in the new era. It goes like this:
Once upon a time there was a boy, and a ghost.
The boy - Adam Milligan - wasn't normal any more due to various reason, but then again he'd never truly been normal to begin with. No one born into the Winchester family lineage was. He was supposed to be dead, but just like his brothers, death didn't stick to him either, and instead he'd now housed the Grace of an angel. The ghost was really the archangel Michael who lost his Grace to the boy. Adam was his Cage, and hence Michael haunted him.
They had a history even before that. One that involved Revelations and prophecies and the old Apocalypse, and how they all went wrong, and spanned infinities in Hell.
They were cursed.
And most importantly they were in love.
It was needless to say, a recipe for tragedy.
They lived together. Not in some tiny nowhere corner of the world barely accessible. No, they lived in a simple old house, in a still small American town. They lived in the house Adam grew up in.
There were two cups for two people, in the kitchen, too much food made daily for one living person to eat, too much of everything for one person to use. There was a room that belonged to the boy's late mother, that was as sacred as the throne room of heaven, kept untouched and preserved as years went by, even as the rest of the house showed signs of ageing and being lived in. There were books that piled up, with quickly fading paper, whose words were read out loud every afternoon. There was a roof that rattled and always seemed to need repairing. There were people who came and went into their lives. Friends, family, acquaintances, others.
There were fights and there were soft words. There were days they wouldn't look, wouldn't acknowledge one another. And there were days when both pretended that they could touch could feel the other, and invaded each other's personal space, curled up around the other, as if to become one single being. There were proclamations of love, promises, post-it notes left on walls. And there were threats to leave, rock salt boundaries barring entry into rooms, and rattling and shaking furniture that accompanied raised voices which would be followed up with broken china.
The days would pass as they were want to do: slow, slower, fast, fast, faster, slow-fast-slow. They all built up to a crescendo, keeping both so tightly would and driving them to the very edge.
There were phantom touches. Then there were those few hours every two years were the phantom touches weren't so phantom. When the ghost would become flesh and blood until sunrise, and the boy who wasn't a boy any more but a man, took him to bed, indulged, and fell off that edge they'd drove themselves too. And then there were those few precious moment after when wrapped up in each other while waiting for morning, the man would hold the archangel a little tighter, firmer, as if it would stop him from turning into a spectre again.
But it wouldn't.
And the process would start all over again, repeat itself and build up until they got another few hours after another two years.
There was no happy ending.
But that was okay, as Adam said, because the ending was theirs, one they chose.
Besides they had all of the time in the world to make it a happy ending.
~fin~