Fanfic: If You Only Knew, Cara/Kahlan
Title: If You Only Knew
Author: individual_68
Pairing: Cara/Kahlan
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Femslash
Disclaimer: Not mine
a/N: made for BB alt for legendland, authors choice
You sit at a distance from us. Walk behind. Alone. With us. Yet not a part of us. The wall is always there. Separating you from us.
I watch you when you do not notice. Witness the pain it causes you. See how much it hurts. The darkness you feel we cannot understand. The silent division. Always present. Never there.
Silhouette in the fading light. On the edge of the clearing. Just out of the campfires light. But not far from its warmth. Afraid to get close. Unwilling to leave.
Shoulders hunched. Head bowed. Know you cannot tell I am watching. Would not let me see this. Sanctuary in solitude.
Long to go to you. To take you in my arms. Kiss away the pain. Tell you words I know you wish to hear. Need to hear. Need to know.
If you only knew. If only I could summon the courage. If.
You have always maintained a distance. Physically. Emotionally. A void to separate you. A wall to protect you. Thought it was your training. Thought it was necessary. Respected your independence. Isolation.
And then you kissed me. An adrenaline response to a stressful situation. A chaste kiss. Innocent. All to brief. Took my breath away. A moment of clarity. Perfection.
The void grew. The distance which separates us now too great. No bridge could traverse it. Long to reach across. To pull you back. To let you know. If you only knew.
If you only knew how good it was to see you. To speak with you. To laugh with you.
If you only knew how my heart skips. My mind races. My skin tingles.
If you only knew how I felt about you. How I dream of you. How I long for nothing but to kiss you.
If you only knew. You are not alone.
Words falter on my tongue. Speeches prepared. Actions planned. I reach out for you. Feel intentions slip through my fingers. Lost opportunities. Conversations abandoned. Mid sentence. Falter. Moments interrupted. Distractions found.
I am afraid. Not of how I feel. Nor who I feel it for. Scared you will not believe. My words. My feelings. Your worth.
So I stay silent. And subtext reigns. Every shrug. Each gesture. A hidden meaning. A true purpose. Known but avoided. Truth goes unspoken. Too honest to be uttered. Too real to be.
You believe you have no right to love. I know how I feel. Know that this is good. Pure. Right.
If you only knew.
I know. One day I will finish my sentence. Tell you all that is in my heart. I will touch your arm as you stand alone. Lead you across the void. Close the distance. And you will believe.
Until that day. That moment of lucidity. Understanding. We will wait. Waste words in meaningless conversations. Lose precious time to obscurity. Watch as the distance closes. As you allow yourself to believe.
I will watch your sad solitude. See the pain that loneliness causes. Etched onto your soul. But if you only knew, you wouldn’t feel so alone.
Author: individual_68
Pairing: Cara/Kahlan
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Femslash
Disclaimer: Not mine
a/N: made for BB alt for legendland, authors choice
You sit at a distance from us. Walk behind. Alone. With us. Yet not a part of us. The wall is always there. Separating you from us.
I watch you when you do not notice. Witness the pain it causes you. See how much it hurts. The darkness you feel we cannot understand. The silent division. Always present. Never there.
Silhouette in the fading light. On the edge of the clearing. Just out of the campfires light. But not far from its warmth. Afraid to get close. Unwilling to leave.
Shoulders hunched. Head bowed. Know you cannot tell I am watching. Would not let me see this. Sanctuary in solitude.
Long to go to you. To take you in my arms. Kiss away the pain. Tell you words I know you wish to hear. Need to hear. Need to know.
If you only knew. If only I could summon the courage. If.
You have always maintained a distance. Physically. Emotionally. A void to separate you. A wall to protect you. Thought it was your training. Thought it was necessary. Respected your independence. Isolation.
And then you kissed me. An adrenaline response to a stressful situation. A chaste kiss. Innocent. All to brief. Took my breath away. A moment of clarity. Perfection.
The void grew. The distance which separates us now too great. No bridge could traverse it. Long to reach across. To pull you back. To let you know. If you only knew.
If you only knew how good it was to see you. To speak with you. To laugh with you.
If you only knew how my heart skips. My mind races. My skin tingles.
If you only knew how I felt about you. How I dream of you. How I long for nothing but to kiss you.
If you only knew. You are not alone.
Words falter on my tongue. Speeches prepared. Actions planned. I reach out for you. Feel intentions slip through my fingers. Lost opportunities. Conversations abandoned. Mid sentence. Falter. Moments interrupted. Distractions found.
I am afraid. Not of how I feel. Nor who I feel it for. Scared you will not believe. My words. My feelings. Your worth.
So I stay silent. And subtext reigns. Every shrug. Each gesture. A hidden meaning. A true purpose. Known but avoided. Truth goes unspoken. Too honest to be uttered. Too real to be.
You believe you have no right to love. I know how I feel. Know that this is good. Pure. Right.
If you only knew.
I know. One day I will finish my sentence. Tell you all that is in my heart. I will touch your arm as you stand alone. Lead you across the void. Close the distance. And you will believe.
Until that day. That moment of lucidity. Understanding. We will wait. Waste words in meaningless conversations. Lose precious time to obscurity. Watch as the distance closes. As you allow yourself to believe.
I will watch your sad solitude. See the pain that loneliness causes. Etched onto your soul. But if you only knew, you wouldn’t feel so alone.