Fic: A Testament to Gryffindor Attention Spans
Title: A Testament to Gryffindor Attention Spans
Summary: This takes place over five minutes of real time. Truth.
Characters/Pairings: James Potter/Lily Evans, Sirius Black
Genre: Humor
Rating/Warnings: G
Word Count: 528
Author's Note: eowyn_rain gave a random prompt about Sirius hopping on one foot and eating a banana. I ran with it. Very small reference to Arrested Development.
Sirius Black was in the common room, hopping on one foot and eating a banana when James came in arm slung over Lily's shoulder, tossing his bag carelessly onto the sofa.
"You really could have used my help, you know, Potter." Lily said teasingly.
Feigning offense, James answered, grinning smugly. "You know, Evans, maybe being Slughorn's favourite has deluded you into a sense of Potion making entitlement."
Sirius continued to hop and the banana never seemed to end. The two turned to their movement challenged friend. Lily snickered, "I'll leave you two to... whatever, I promised Remus to catch him up with what he missed in Charms."
It is only after Lily has completely left the room for the girls' dormitories (though she was still very much in James' mind) that Sirius' flailing caught James' attention. (Remember, this was probably in the span of thirty seconds, report this to any testament of Gryffindor attention).
"That's only funny the first minute, you know." James said as he took a seat on the sofa. He flipped his notes open "I scribbled some important highlights of Flitwick's class, the man is a walking innuendo."
It took James a reading (or five, plus laughter) through Flitwick's gem of 'Smith, if you wave your wand like that again, you are getting your magic stick REVOKED' to realize that Sirius was still endlessly eating a banana and hopping on one foot and now he was nodding his head at his Charms work.
Venturing a guess, James picked up his wand, squinted as he pointed at Sirius and said "Finite Incan...tatem?"
"THANK GOD." Sirius groaned with exasperation, collapsing onto a heap on the floor. From his heap he said "Peter thought I was going for a record or something and Remus said something about a desperate plea for attention."
"What, you didn't like my flashing neon sign that said 'Inbred'?" James grinned. "So what'd you do this time?"
"Did you know that that girl in Ravenclaw actually has a wooden leg?" Sirius asked loudly as he finally made his way to the sofa next to James. "I only told her that I quite fancied pirates and that she appealed to me."
"Oh that's where the banana came from." James nodded. "Hang on, did you think she was just wearing one for fun?"
Sirius narrowed his eyes at him. "My inbred eyes aren't perfect, though they're a beautiful grey, Prongs."
"Sirius, it goes 'plonk plonk plonk' whenever she walks." James laughed. "Whatever, you deserved that one. I'm going to go find her, get ten points to Ravenclaw, how long were you hopping for?"
"Since half eleven." Sirius replied flatly.
"Twenty points then." James grinned, springing out of his seat and flying out of the room.
Sirius fell to his knees dramatically and looked to the stone ceiling and said "JAMES, I HARDLY KNEW YE."
Lily came back downstairs. "Finite Incantatem. Impressive, Potter." She grinned before leaving.
"My legs are fine, I'm fine, thank you Evans. I thought you HAD A HEART." Sirius yelled to her retreating form.
At least James' notes about Flitwick's innuendo were amusing. "'And with a wave of my wand, I blue myself, and you can too' Oh Merlin, I missed a good day. Bloody pirates."
Summary: This takes place over five minutes of real time. Truth.
Characters/Pairings: James Potter/Lily Evans, Sirius Black
Genre: Humor
Rating/Warnings: G
Word Count: 528
Author's Note: eowyn_rain gave a random prompt about Sirius hopping on one foot and eating a banana. I ran with it. Very small reference to Arrested Development.
Sirius Black was in the common room, hopping on one foot and eating a banana when James came in arm slung over Lily's shoulder, tossing his bag carelessly onto the sofa.
"You really could have used my help, you know, Potter." Lily said teasingly.
Feigning offense, James answered, grinning smugly. "You know, Evans, maybe being Slughorn's favourite has deluded you into a sense of Potion making entitlement."
Sirius continued to hop and the banana never seemed to end. The two turned to their movement challenged friend. Lily snickered, "I'll leave you two to... whatever, I promised Remus to catch him up with what he missed in Charms."
It is only after Lily has completely left the room for the girls' dormitories (though she was still very much in James' mind) that Sirius' flailing caught James' attention. (Remember, this was probably in the span of thirty seconds, report this to any testament of Gryffindor attention).
"That's only funny the first minute, you know." James said as he took a seat on the sofa. He flipped his notes open "I scribbled some important highlights of Flitwick's class, the man is a walking innuendo."
It took James a reading (or five, plus laughter) through Flitwick's gem of 'Smith, if you wave your wand like that again, you are getting your magic stick REVOKED' to realize that Sirius was still endlessly eating a banana and hopping on one foot and now he was nodding his head at his Charms work.
Venturing a guess, James picked up his wand, squinted as he pointed at Sirius and said "Finite Incan...tatem?"
"THANK GOD." Sirius groaned with exasperation, collapsing onto a heap on the floor. From his heap he said "Peter thought I was going for a record or something and Remus said something about a desperate plea for attention."
"What, you didn't like my flashing neon sign that said 'Inbred'?" James grinned. "So what'd you do this time?"
"Did you know that that girl in Ravenclaw actually has a wooden leg?" Sirius asked loudly as he finally made his way to the sofa next to James. "I only told her that I quite fancied pirates and that she appealed to me."
"Oh that's where the banana came from." James nodded. "Hang on, did you think she was just wearing one for fun?"
Sirius narrowed his eyes at him. "My inbred eyes aren't perfect, though they're a beautiful grey, Prongs."
"Sirius, it goes 'plonk plonk plonk' whenever she walks." James laughed. "Whatever, you deserved that one. I'm going to go find her, get ten points to Ravenclaw, how long were you hopping for?"
"Since half eleven." Sirius replied flatly.
"Twenty points then." James grinned, springing out of his seat and flying out of the room.
Sirius fell to his knees dramatically and looked to the stone ceiling and said "JAMES, I HARDLY KNEW YE."
Lily came back downstairs. "Finite Incantatem. Impressive, Potter." She grinned before leaving.
"My legs are fine, I'm fine, thank you Evans. I thought you HAD A HEART." Sirius yelled to her retreating form.
At least James' notes about Flitwick's innuendo were amusing. "'And with a wave of my wand, I blue myself, and you can too' Oh Merlin, I missed a good day. Bloody pirates."