019 ∞ VIDEO // ACTION

[immortaltwat]

[Nathan is at a pub. A very, very crowded pub. He's nursing the dregs of a beer, glaring a the people at the bar who are squished up against him.]

You know, they really ought to think it through before bringing so many people at once. How's a man supposed to get served with these bastards crowding up the place? It's really incon--

[And then he

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[feorging]

That's no proper way to get to toss from a pub, mate. 'Ought to have caused a bit more property damage, or at least put a hex on that bloke.

[immortaltwat]

A hex? How do you suppose I work that one out?

[feorging]

Ah. Muggle, are we? Not to worry. I happen to carry a bundle oh U-No-Poo handy at all times. Or if you're feelin' a tad more creative, you could always toss a good Spectum Pestrum into into the place.

[Fred figures peddling to Muggles can't break too many inter-dimensional paradox land laws.]

[immortaltwat]

[Nathan doesn't have a clue what he's on about. There's something about poo in there, but that's about all he got from that.]

Okay, okay. I know the accent's deceiving, but I actually speak English. Can we try that again in a way that actually makes sense this time?

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[artsyfartsybaby]

[Oh, hello. This is the same Angela Nathan knows, only not the same Angela. This makes sense somehow on days like today. Deal with it, Nate. And no, she's not here for a drink. She just so happened to be waddling by, okay? Even Angela knows what things are good for baby growers and and vodka isn't one of those things. Shame, that.]

You really don't know how to behave in public.

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[immortaltwat]

[Nathan had been shouting obscenities through the door and complaining about not being allowed to finish his drink. Forget that he already knocked it over.

The sight of Ange is enough to make him forget about that completely, though. He's staring not-so-subtly at her tummy.]

What the hell happened to you?

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[artsyfartsybaby]

[Can Nathan make it a little less obvious? Knowing him, probably not. It's bad enough Angela feels like a overstuffed turkey on a daily basis; she doesn't need this kid staring at her like she's a freak of nature.]

You see, when a man and a woman really love each other...

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[immortaltwat]

[Nathan makes a dismissive sound, waving a hand.]

Yeah, I know that... I mean what happened to you. You sure as hell weren't doing a whale impersonation the last time I saw you.

[truculentsoul]

[A girl, possibly 16, flips on video. She's laughing, but she's in shadow, and wearing big, hipster-style sunglasses.]

That was AMAZING. Who's 'Barry' meant to be? A ghost?

[immortaltwat]

[He's... going to go ahead and assume she's at least 16. He senses he could possibly be in with an in here.]

Barry's my friend. He turns invisible and commits obscene acts on the weak and emotionally vulnerable.

[truculentsoul]

[She doesn't believe a word of it, but she's smirking at him. Also, she's technically 61, Nathan, so...]

Not much of a friend, then, is he? And... [A finger to her lips, fingernail painted hot pink.] Are you saying you're emotionally vulnerable?

[immortaltwat]

[Big, wide, completely innocent eyes.] I'm very emotionally vulnerable. I'll probably need counselling after this.

He put his... thing in my ear! I'm scarred. No woman's ever going to want to hold me again.

[And then he erupts into huge, fake sobs. He clearly needs some "comforting" here. At some point he will stop hitting on old woman. Sadly, today doesn't seem to be that day.]

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[gaiustavarus]

[ Hi. Have a guy dressed like a Roman soldier looming over you. ]

You sound like Max.

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[immortaltwat]

[Nathan eyes him up, unable to suppress a smirk at the attire.]

Is that short for Maximus? Because, you know, I might be descended from him.

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[gaiustavarus]

It is. [ Dry. ] And I doubt you're even from the same world.

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[immortaltwat]

How do you know?

I know what his name is. Isn't that proof enough?

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[fookinchav]

Nathan?

[..Give it a second.]

Whatthefuck?!

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[immortaltwat]

Kelly!

[He looks so pleased to see you. No, he won't be useful and try to explain this place.]

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[fookinchav]

You better start explaining t'me how you're already getting yourself kicked out of pubs here, mate. [She'ssofreakedoutohmygod. But of course she covers up her nerves with rage, cause well. She's Kelly.] What's this place all about?!

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[immortaltwat]

Already? I've been kicked out of loads of places. I've been here ages.

It's okay, though. You'll probably be gone by Monday. That's what happened when a load of people got stuck here last time, anyway.