Why it Must be Me? - Chapter 29
Title: The Maknae's Dilemma Series: Story 1 - Cho Kyuhyun of Super Junior (Why it Must be Me?)
Author: imaginarybulb
Rating: PG-13 to NC-17
Pairing(s): Kyuhyun/?, Eunhyuk/Kibum/Donghae, Kyuhyun/Sungmin, Kangin/Leeteuk, Hankyung/Heechul, parings may come and go
Summary: It had always been the three of them. Everyone knew that, so does Kyuhyun. Especially Kyuhyun. But still, Kyuhyun succumbed into their world.
“DIE, HYUNG!!!!”
“WH-YAH!! CHO KYUHYUN!!!
Donghae groaned while Kyuhyun shouted in victory; he had won the 5th game with Donghae and from the bet the two of them made, Donghae had to buy him lunch for a week.
“Eunhyuk-ah, help me~~!!!!” the dancer wailed as he gave Eunhyuk the best kicked-puppy look he could. However, to his dismay, his so-called best friend only laughed his ass off, “It’s your fault, Hae. Kyuhyun wasn’t called GameKyu for no reason you know.”
“Hyuk hyung is right, hyung,” Kyuhyun said smugly, “You can’t beat the Almighty Cho Kyuhyun.”
And when Donghae turned his head towards Kyuhyun, putting on the best cute/pleading look on his face, the one that made ELFs’ poor fangirl hearts to go ‘awwww~’, hoping that it would somehow soften Kyuhyun’s heart. However, as soon as his eyes darted towards Kyuhyun, the maknae was looking at him threateningly, ominous aura surrounding the younger male.
“Hyung… You’re not going to use your cute face to beg your way out of this bet, right?”
“Eeeepp!!” Donghae cowered in fear at Kyuhyun’s dark look before he shakily shook his head in denial. He should’ve known that no one can get out of the bet they made with Cho Kyuhyun; especially if it involves food.
“Teukie hyung!!!” Kyuhyun giggled to himself when Donghae went to Leeteuk who had just waken up. The leader was mumbling something about Donghae being so heavy and he’s still sleepy while Donghae was still whining about the bet he lost with Kyuhyun.
Kyuhyun smiled to himself, after the talk he had with Sungmin, he decided t do the exact think Sungmin told him to do; to follow his heart. And when he did follow his heart, he felt happy and calm and as if the heavy burden on his chest had disappeared completely.
He laughed lightly when Donghae began plastered himself to Ryeowook since Leeteuk is ignoring him (because the leader is still sleepy), whining about Kyuhyun being an inconsiderate maknae.
Yes, he’s at peace.
--
“Woah…. Yah…. Are you sure this is for you? Alone?”
Donghae asked as his eyes fixated on the amount of food Kyuhyun had ordered for himself. It’s enough for five people - okay, he’s exaggerating but it’s still an insane amount for one person! He sighed to himself, ugh…looks like my wallet is going to be skinny this week.
“Yep,” Kyuhyun grinned and when Donghae removed his eyes from the food to glare at Kyuhyun, the maknae had already started to devour the food and Donghae’s heart skipped a beat.
It was known to everyone Kyuhyun loves to eat. Maybe it was unexpected when you see how frail Kyuhyun’s body is, but in front of food, the maknae always forgot about everything around him and focuses on what he was eating, just like when he was gaming.
But Donghae didn’t mind it, since Kyuhyun is both cute and amusing when he eats.
He propped his chin on his knuckles, a soft smile broke across his face as he watched Kyuhyun eats, apparently oblivious of the eyes on him. The maknae’s cheeks were puffed out and Donghae’s fingers were itching to pinch those round, white, soft cheeks.
“Woah! That’s a lot of food, Kyuhyun-ah!”
Donghae jumped when he heard Eunhyuk’s voice; the older male had his hand on Donghae’s shoulder, his eyes wide as he grinned in disbelieve at Kyuhyun.
Donghae grumbled under his breath, aish…why is he here?
Eunhyuk turned towards him and as if reading his mind, the older dancer winked mischievously at him and Donghae pouted.
“Since Donghae hyung is buying, why not take the chance?” Kyuhyun replied with a cheeky grin, not noticing the grains of rice left on his mouth. Donghae and Eunhyuk blinked at the oblivious maknae before a thought appeared on their head (and without them knowing it, they’re thinking about the same thing in the same time).
I’ll wipe them for him!
As Donghae reached towards Kyuhyun while Eunhyuk grabbed the nearest napkin to wipe Kyuhyun’s mouth, the maknae had already beat them to it when he licked the grains of rice before resuming his eating, leaving the two dancers’ hands hung mid-air.
He looked up when he noticed the awkward position, his eyebrows raised, “What’s wrong?”
Donghae and Eunhyuk blinked some more before Donghae covered his mouth and Eunhyuk used the napkin to wipe invisible sweat on his forehead (to avoid any embarrassment) while grinning, “Oh, nothing!”
Kyuhyun stared at his hyungs for a moment before he shrugged and began eating.
--
“Why do you have to be there too!?”
“What!? It’s not my fault! I was just passing by!”
“Pfft… Yeah right, stalker…”
“I am not!”
Donghae rolled his eyes as Eunhyuk pouted; the older one had his hands crossed over his chest. Donghae sighed as he focused his attention back to the road. Sungmin had picked up Kyuhyun since they had something to be done, leaving Donghae with Eunhyuk. He had pouted when Kyuhyun left though, since he thought of spending more time with Kyuhyun (and probably make some excuses so that Eunhyuk would leave them alone).
“Besides, you know I like Kyuhyun too! So it’s normal for me to show affections to him!” Eunhyuk said after a moment of silence.
Donghae whined, “But I want to spend some time with him!”
“But you have all the time in the world to spend with him when you guys in China!” Eunhyuk argued and Donghae went silence. Eunhyuk was right, since he’s in Super Junior M with Kyuhyun, he got to spend more time with the maknae especially when they’re in China.
Seeing Donghae lost the argument, Eunhyuk grinned and did a ‘victory’ sign, which Donghae rolled his eyes at, “I can’t believe we’re thinking about the same thing in the same time…”
“What do you mean?” Eunhyuk asked, puzzled.
A soft chuckle escaped Donghae’s lips, “You know, earlier. When we saw the grains of rice on his mouth. You were about to wipe them for him right?”
Eunhyuk laughed lightly, “I guess when we like the same person, we’re connected in a way huh?”
Donghae nodded with a smile, silently agreed with Eunhyuk’s words. Even though the fans saw them as best friends, they didn’t know that EUNHAE was born because of Kibum. After the two of them knew each others’ feelings towards Kibum, they became closer, best friend. Despite the slight jealousy they felt when Kibum was spending with one of them, there’s no bad blood between them.
Speaking of Kibum…
The smile on Donghae’s face fell as he lets out a soft sigh, bringing Eunhyuk’s attention to him. The older dancer tilted his head as he looked at Donghae in concern, “Hae? What’s wrong?”
Donghae glanced at Eunhyuk, giving the older one a bitter smile before he averted his gaze to the road, “I’m thinking about Kibum.”
Realization dawn on Eunhyuk as he slumped on the leather seat beside Donghae, a small frown settled on his face, “Do you think what we’re doing right now is wrong?”
Donghae didn’t answer and a pregnant silence ensued between them before Donghae spoke out, “I don’t know, Hyuk…”
Eunhyuk stared at his fiddled fingers in disappointment. He was hoping Donghae would probably say ‘it’s not wrong’ and maybe it can ease down the rising guilt in him. But hearing the younger one was as clueless as he was, the guilt grew bigger.
“Sometimes…” Donghae started after a moment, “I’d like to think that it’s normal that we dote on Kyuhyun. I mean, he’s the maknae and it’s normal for the maknae to act cute while his hyungs spoil him, right?” he asked rhetorically and paused momentarily before continuing.
“I mean… Maybe, other people see it as a lame excuse to cover up the truth, as a reason to be closer to Kyuhyun without worrying about feeling guilty to Kibum. But… Then, if you think about it, comparing to the time when we can’t even talk normally to Kyuhyun, when we’re awkward around him to now; where we can laugh and joke with him, where we can hug and ruffle his hair, don’t you think it’s worth it? Knowing that he’s smiling because of us?”
Eunhyuk went silence, a part of him comforted by Donghae’s words but another part of him is still guilty towards Kibum. He looked at Donghae, “But Kibum…”
Donghae’s body tensed at Kibum’s name. Even though he had kinda assured Eunhyuk and himself that everything is okay, it would be a lie if he said he didn’t think about Kibum. Every time he laughs with Kyuhyun, he thinks of Kibum. Every time he talks to Kyuhyun, he thinks of Kibum. Every time he’s around Kyuhyun, he thinks of Kibum.
Even when he’s dreaming of Kyuhyun, there’s also Kibum.
No matter how happy he is with Kyuhyun, how he wishes that Kyuhyun can be his (and he’s sure Eunhyuk was thinking the same), he’s still in love with Kibum. The amount of love he had for Kibum the first time he fell in love with the younger one had never lessened, not even 0.0001%. In fact, every single time, the love for Kibum just doubled up, piled up and suffocated him in a way that he’s not complaining at all.
And then there’s Kyuhyun. Kyuhyun suddenly come in and disturb the tiny circle he had with Kibum and Eunhyuk. Kyuhyun suddenly come in, crumbling the castle he had with Kibum and Eunhyuk. Kyuhyun suddenly come in; with just being Cho Kyuhyun and sneakily stole a part of his heart.
It started with a small piece, just normal affection a hyung has for his dongsaeng. Then Kyuhyun stole some more, and more, and more and Donghae found himself not knowing if he should give the last piece to Kibum or Kyuhyun.
“We have to choose in the end right?”
Eunhyuk suddenly said softly, breaking Donghae from his train of thoughts. He briefly glanced at the older dancer and held his hand,
“Yeah, I guess so…”
--
“Yeahhh~ Another free lunch from Donghae hyung~”
Kyuhyun sing-sang as he entered the practice room, Donghae following suit, a disbelieve look on his face as he checked his wallet, only to find it almost empty.
“What did you guys eat?” Ryeowook asked and before Kyuhyun could answer, Donghae cuts him off.
“What do you mean by ‘what did you guys eat’!? Kyuhyun ate everything by himself!!”
All eyes widened in disbelieve at Donghae’s outburst while Kyuhyun only giggled when Donghae whined at Leeteuk, “Hyuuuuung!! I can’t take it anymore!! I’m going to grow bald like this!! Kyuhyun is sucking my money out!!”
Leeteuk sighed but he still patted Donghae’s head comfortingly, “I don’t know what to say, Donghae-ah… You’re the one who made that bet with Kyuhyun…. You know he’s a GameKyu right? No one can beat him.”
“Buuuutt~!” Donghae pouted, “How should I know he’s going to eat that much!? He’s so skinny! Where did all the food went to!?”
“Hae, if you must know, all the food Kyuhyun ate went to his bubbly butt,” Heechul answered with a smirk as he lightly smacked the maknae’s rear, earning a surprised ‘Eeeep!’ from Kyuhyun before laughing while slinging his arm around the grumbling maknae’s shoulder.
Donghae blinked at the sentence and while the other members broke into laughter at Heechul’s remark, he was filled with jealousy. Of course he noticed Kyuhyun’s bubble butt for quite some time now and seeing Heechul smacking that ass so freely, Donghae is not happy at all.
However, unknown to the members (including Donghae), Eunhyuk was blushing furiously. The memories of what had happened between him and Kyuhyun while practicing the hip-thrust flashed in his mind. The feeling of Kyuhyun’s ass In his hands, the weird but good mixture of sweats and vanilla scent from Kyuhyun, the ticklish feelings of Kyuhyun’s messy hair, the slight shiver from Kyuhyun when he placed his hands on the maknae’s hip to the sensation he felt when the curve of Kyuhyun’s ass pressed against his growing erection.
Fuck, Eunhyuk shook his head off the thoughts. No one knows about what happened (if Kyuhyun kept it as a secret though, but he doubt that the maknae would tell the members about it), not even Donghae (the younger dancer would throw childish tantrum if he ever finds out about it) and Eunhyuk prefer to keep it that way.
He sighed, keep it down, Lee Hyukjae.
--
“Hyungs, I’m going out for a while,” Kyuhyun informed the members as he puts on his shoes and after earning the ‘okay’ and ‘take care’ from Sungmin and Ryeowook, he opened the door and was about step out of the dorm when he saw Eunhyuk and Donghae at the door.
“Oh, hyung!” Kyuhyun exclaimed with a smile.
“Hey, Kyu!” Eunhyuk greeted him back with a grin before the grin fell as both his and Donghae’s eyes scanned the maknae.
“You’re going somewhere?” Donghae asked.
“Yeah, Henli called and said that he was bored. I thought of going out with him or something.”
The two dancers nodded slowly at Kyuhyun’s words. Hiding the growing disappointment, they grinned at Kyuhyun, “You should go. Henli must be waiting for you.”
“You sounded like you want to kick me out,” Kyuhyun said jokingly and the three laughed at Kyuhyun’s words (while Donghae and Eunhyuk both think, we don’t want to kick you out. If anything, we want to keep you in. )
Biding the two dancers a goodbye, Kyuhyun left. Donghae and Eunhyuk stared at the retreating male for a moment. They thought of hanging out with Kyuhyun for the night, maybe playing some more games or just watching television, but fate is not by their side for tonight.
--
“Kuixian gege~!”
Kyuhyun smiled when Henry grinned and waved at him enthusiastically. He ruffled the younger one’s hair, Henry is very fun to hang out with. He has a bubbly personality and he knows the right thing to say in the right moment, one of the reasons why it’s easy for the Super Junior members to blend in with him the first time they met despite the difference in language and culture.
“Where should we go?” Henry asked as they walked side by side. They didn’t take the car so that they can admire the night view of Seoul. There aren’t many people, so they don’t have to worry about fans.
Kyuhyun shrugged, “I’m not sure myself. Where do you want to go?”
Henry hummed before he stopped to grin at Kyuhyun, “There’s a place I wanted to go.”
--
Eunhyuk lazily munched the chips as he watched the television. Donghae and Shindong were seating beside him while Ryeowook and Sungmin sat on the couch. The 5 of them decided to watch the latest drama together since they don’t have any schedule that night. It was the usual romantic drama and Eunhyuk was getting sleepy.
As he yawned for the umpteenth time that night, the bell of the dorm rang. He nudged Donghae, gesturing the younger dancer to open the door. However, since Donghae was too engrossed in the show, he refused to go. Rolling his eyes, Eunhyuk pushed himself up and dragged his sleepy body to the door, “Coming!’
Sighing, he opened the door, only to find Leeteuk grinning at him.
He frowned, “Hyung?”
Winking at him, Leeteuk turned half of his body, revealing a familiar male behind him.
Eunhyuk’s eyes widened, the sleepiness earlier vanished in thin air,
“Kibum…?”
--
“Ahhh~ That was so much fun!” Henry exclaimed as he skipped around, Kyuhyun laughing lightly at the younger one’s childish antics.
Then, Henry suddenly stopped, causing Kyuhyun to raise his brows in confusion, “Henli…?”
“Ge…” Henry started before he turned around and Kyuhyun frowned at the guilt on Henry’s face. “…Is it okay… If we laugh and be happy like this?”
Kyuhyun tilted his head to the side, “What do you mean?”
“….I mean… Hankyung gege is…” Henry cuts himself off and averted his gaze to the ground, eyes glassy.
Kyuhyun stared at the younger one before he sighed silently while approaching Henry. He ruffled Henry’s hair, causing the younger one to look up at him, “Yah… We promised to stop thinking about it right? If Heechul hyung hears you, he’s going to start lecturing non-stop.”
Henry sighed, a pout on his face, “But… Sometimes, I feel guilty when I think about Hankyung gege… He helped me a lot…”
“He helped all of us a lot…” Kyuhyun added softly before he smiled at Henry, “Don’t worry, I’m sure Hankyung hyung wants us to be happy.”
Henry nodded softly, “Okay…”
Chuckling, Kyuhyun removed his hand from Henry’s hair and continued walking, the younger one tailing him from behind. They shared a light conversation and light laughs, until Henry’s eyes caught something.
“What’s that?”
“What's what?” Kyuhyun asked.
“What's that,” Henry repeated, pointing to a small stall on the side of the road as he walked towards the said stall. Kyuhyun followed Henry silently, watching as the younger one observe what was sold at the stall.
He stopped besides Henry, “Just stuff… I think…”
“They’re so pretty, gege!” Henry said as he looked at the small trinkets in fascination. Kyuhyun smiled at the younger one before he lightly shook his head and absentmindedly observe the stuffs that were sold. There are small porcelain statues, rings, necklaces, trinkets and other what Kyuhyun described as ‘girl stuffs’.
As he was looking around, his eyes caught a very cute porcelain monkey and fish. A grin beamed across his face as he picked up the two statues and ran his thumbs across the delicate statues, his mind reminded about Donghae and Eunhyuk.
A thought came to him and he smiled at the old woman, “I’ll buy these.”
The woman smiled back and as she took the two porcelain statues from Kyuhyun’s hands to wrap them, his eyes caught a small, porcelain snowman and cat.
He chuckled silently as he picked them up, these suit Kibum hyung and Sungmin hyung a lot, before handing them to the older woman.
I hope they’ll like it…
--
Kyuhyun hummed to himself as he happily skipped towards the dorm. Lifting the paper bag in his hand, he grinned to himself, wishing that his hyungs would love the small presents he got for them.
I need to give these to them secretly though… The other hyungs will whine if they knew I didn’t get them anything…he thought with a smile. However, his smile fell slightly and his steps stopped when he heard laughter coming from the dorm.
What are they doing? he thought curiously as he approached the dorm. Pressing the button, he waited for the door to open. After a while, the door was opened by Yesung, who’s face brightened at seeing him.
He blinked, why is hyung so happy to see me?
“Kyuhyun-ah! Come! Come!” Yesung said as he grabbed the maknae’s arm and lightly dragged him inside. Kyuhyun stumbled as he tried to take off his shoes while Yesung dragging him, “Hyung? What’s wrong?”
“Ta-dahh!!” Yesung and the other members of Super Junior exclaimed and Kyuhyun’s eyes widened at seeing Kibum grinning and waving at him.
A grin broke across his face as he almost-run towards Kibum, “Hyung!! When did you come home!?”
Kibum laughed, “Just now. I got a week off~!”
“Really!?” Kyuhyun’s grin grew wider. He had missed Kibum and he’s happy that he can see Kibum again. And we’ll be able to hang out for a week! he thought happily.
I wonder when I’ll be able to give them the present-
“Ah, Teukie-hyung. Can I borrow Donghae hyung and Eunhyuk for three days?”
The grin on Kyuhyun’s face falters, what?
“Oh? For what?” Leeteuk asked.
Kibum smiled shyly and Kyuhyun saw how his cheeks reddened as he reached for Eunhyuk and Donghae’s hand, “I want to spend some time with them…”
A collection of whistles and whines came from the members, “Yah! You guys are so cheesy!”
The actor laughed lightly and Leeteuk smiled as he nodded while patting the younger one’s shoulder, “Sure, Kibum-ah.”
“Thanks hyung,” Kibum said before he averted his eyes to Kyuhyun. He raised his brows at the slight surprise on Kyuhyun’s face, “Kyuhyun?”
Kyuhyun blinked as he broke off his reverie, “Y-Yeah?”
“Are you okay?”
“I…” he stammered before forcing out a laugh, “Of course I’m okay! Why won’t I be okay?”
“Well, I thought you’ll be sad if I don’t spend some time with you since I was always away,” the actor smiled sheepishly and Kyuhyun gripped the paper bag in his hand tighter.
“Hyung, you think I’m desperate to spend more time with you?” Kyuhyun tried to joke and while the other members laughed at his remarks, his heart pierced by his own lie.
“I’m seriously okay, hyung. I understand you want to spend more time with you hubbies~” he shot the three a teasing smile and the other members joined in the teasing.
“Thanks, Kyu… For understanding,” Kibum said, “But it’s just for three days. After that I’m all yours,” he winked playfully and Kyuhyun’s heart throbbed.
He gripped the hidden paper bag a bit tighter, forcing a smile a bit longer, “Of course, hyung.”
Don’t say that, hyung… Don’t say something that isn’t true to me…
--
Kyuhyun silently traced his fingers across the porcelain statues situated on the nightstand beside his bed. Eunhyuk, Donghae and Kibum had departed to Jeju earlier in the morning and even though Kyuhyun had teased the three of them, even though he had shamelessly asked for souvenirs with a grin like a normal maknae, like a normal friend, his heart was in pain all the time.
Sungmin and Ryeowook had asked him if he’s okay and Kyuhyun lied, saying ‘I’m okay, hyung’ happily as if his chest is not being pressed down, choking him. He had promised himself to never depend on Sungmin anymore and since he had broken the promise he made with Sungmin, Ryeowook and himself, the promise of making sure he’s not crossing the line he’d drawn with the Kihyukhae trio, at least, he wants to keep the promise of not burdening Sungmin.
He closed his eyes when he felt tears pricked in his eyes, not wanting to cry again.
Looks like the heavy burden had come back and it’s heavier than before.
He sighed softly and buried his face into his folded arms,
“….Why….it must be me…?”
Author: imaginarybulb
Rating: PG-13 to NC-17
Pairing(s): Kyuhyun/?, Eunhyuk/Kibum/Donghae, Kyuhyun/Sungmin, Kangin/Leeteuk, Hankyung/Heechul, parings may come and go
Summary: It had always been the three of them. Everyone knew that, so does Kyuhyun. Especially Kyuhyun. But still, Kyuhyun succumbed into their world.
“DIE, HYUNG!!!!”
“WH-YAH!! CHO KYUHYUN!!!
Donghae groaned while Kyuhyun shouted in victory; he had won the 5th game with Donghae and from the bet the two of them made, Donghae had to buy him lunch for a week.
“Eunhyuk-ah, help me~~!!!!” the dancer wailed as he gave Eunhyuk the best kicked-puppy look he could. However, to his dismay, his so-called best friend only laughed his ass off, “It’s your fault, Hae. Kyuhyun wasn’t called GameKyu for no reason you know.”
“Hyuk hyung is right, hyung,” Kyuhyun said smugly, “You can’t beat the Almighty Cho Kyuhyun.”
And when Donghae turned his head towards Kyuhyun, putting on the best cute/pleading look on his face, the one that made ELFs’ poor fangirl hearts to go ‘awwww~’, hoping that it would somehow soften Kyuhyun’s heart. However, as soon as his eyes darted towards Kyuhyun, the maknae was looking at him threateningly, ominous aura surrounding the younger male.
“Hyung… You’re not going to use your cute face to beg your way out of this bet, right?”
“Eeeepp!!” Donghae cowered in fear at Kyuhyun’s dark look before he shakily shook his head in denial. He should’ve known that no one can get out of the bet they made with Cho Kyuhyun; especially if it involves food.
“Teukie hyung!!!” Kyuhyun giggled to himself when Donghae went to Leeteuk who had just waken up. The leader was mumbling something about Donghae being so heavy and he’s still sleepy while Donghae was still whining about the bet he lost with Kyuhyun.
Kyuhyun smiled to himself, after the talk he had with Sungmin, he decided t do the exact think Sungmin told him to do; to follow his heart. And when he did follow his heart, he felt happy and calm and as if the heavy burden on his chest had disappeared completely.
He laughed lightly when Donghae began plastered himself to Ryeowook since Leeteuk is ignoring him (because the leader is still sleepy), whining about Kyuhyun being an inconsiderate maknae.
Yes, he’s at peace.
--
“Woah…. Yah…. Are you sure this is for you? Alone?”
Donghae asked as his eyes fixated on the amount of food Kyuhyun had ordered for himself. It’s enough for five people - okay, he’s exaggerating but it’s still an insane amount for one person! He sighed to himself, ugh…looks like my wallet is going to be skinny this week.
“Yep,” Kyuhyun grinned and when Donghae removed his eyes from the food to glare at Kyuhyun, the maknae had already started to devour the food and Donghae’s heart skipped a beat.
It was known to everyone Kyuhyun loves to eat. Maybe it was unexpected when you see how frail Kyuhyun’s body is, but in front of food, the maknae always forgot about everything around him and focuses on what he was eating, just like when he was gaming.
But Donghae didn’t mind it, since Kyuhyun is both cute and amusing when he eats.
He propped his chin on his knuckles, a soft smile broke across his face as he watched Kyuhyun eats, apparently oblivious of the eyes on him. The maknae’s cheeks were puffed out and Donghae’s fingers were itching to pinch those round, white, soft cheeks.
“Woah! That’s a lot of food, Kyuhyun-ah!”
Donghae jumped when he heard Eunhyuk’s voice; the older male had his hand on Donghae’s shoulder, his eyes wide as he grinned in disbelieve at Kyuhyun.
Donghae grumbled under his breath, aish…why is he here?
Eunhyuk turned towards him and as if reading his mind, the older dancer winked mischievously at him and Donghae pouted.
“Since Donghae hyung is buying, why not take the chance?” Kyuhyun replied with a cheeky grin, not noticing the grains of rice left on his mouth. Donghae and Eunhyuk blinked at the oblivious maknae before a thought appeared on their head (and without them knowing it, they’re thinking about the same thing in the same time).
I’ll wipe them for him!
As Donghae reached towards Kyuhyun while Eunhyuk grabbed the nearest napkin to wipe Kyuhyun’s mouth, the maknae had already beat them to it when he licked the grains of rice before resuming his eating, leaving the two dancers’ hands hung mid-air.
He looked up when he noticed the awkward position, his eyebrows raised, “What’s wrong?”
Donghae and Eunhyuk blinked some more before Donghae covered his mouth and Eunhyuk used the napkin to wipe invisible sweat on his forehead (to avoid any embarrassment) while grinning, “Oh, nothing!”
Kyuhyun stared at his hyungs for a moment before he shrugged and began eating.
--
“Why do you have to be there too!?”
“What!? It’s not my fault! I was just passing by!”
“Pfft… Yeah right, stalker…”
“I am not!”
Donghae rolled his eyes as Eunhyuk pouted; the older one had his hands crossed over his chest. Donghae sighed as he focused his attention back to the road. Sungmin had picked up Kyuhyun since they had something to be done, leaving Donghae with Eunhyuk. He had pouted when Kyuhyun left though, since he thought of spending more time with Kyuhyun (and probably make some excuses so that Eunhyuk would leave them alone).
“Besides, you know I like Kyuhyun too! So it’s normal for me to show affections to him!” Eunhyuk said after a moment of silence.
Donghae whined, “But I want to spend some time with him!”
“But you have all the time in the world to spend with him when you guys in China!” Eunhyuk argued and Donghae went silence. Eunhyuk was right, since he’s in Super Junior M with Kyuhyun, he got to spend more time with the maknae especially when they’re in China.
Seeing Donghae lost the argument, Eunhyuk grinned and did a ‘victory’ sign, which Donghae rolled his eyes at, “I can’t believe we’re thinking about the same thing in the same time…”
“What do you mean?” Eunhyuk asked, puzzled.
A soft chuckle escaped Donghae’s lips, “You know, earlier. When we saw the grains of rice on his mouth. You were about to wipe them for him right?”
Eunhyuk laughed lightly, “I guess when we like the same person, we’re connected in a way huh?”
Donghae nodded with a smile, silently agreed with Eunhyuk’s words. Even though the fans saw them as best friends, they didn’t know that EUNHAE was born because of Kibum. After the two of them knew each others’ feelings towards Kibum, they became closer, best friend. Despite the slight jealousy they felt when Kibum was spending with one of them, there’s no bad blood between them.
Speaking of Kibum…
The smile on Donghae’s face fell as he lets out a soft sigh, bringing Eunhyuk’s attention to him. The older dancer tilted his head as he looked at Donghae in concern, “Hae? What’s wrong?”
Donghae glanced at Eunhyuk, giving the older one a bitter smile before he averted his gaze to the road, “I’m thinking about Kibum.”
Realization dawn on Eunhyuk as he slumped on the leather seat beside Donghae, a small frown settled on his face, “Do you think what we’re doing right now is wrong?”
Donghae didn’t answer and a pregnant silence ensued between them before Donghae spoke out, “I don’t know, Hyuk…”
Eunhyuk stared at his fiddled fingers in disappointment. He was hoping Donghae would probably say ‘it’s not wrong’ and maybe it can ease down the rising guilt in him. But hearing the younger one was as clueless as he was, the guilt grew bigger.
“Sometimes…” Donghae started after a moment, “I’d like to think that it’s normal that we dote on Kyuhyun. I mean, he’s the maknae and it’s normal for the maknae to act cute while his hyungs spoil him, right?” he asked rhetorically and paused momentarily before continuing.
“I mean… Maybe, other people see it as a lame excuse to cover up the truth, as a reason to be closer to Kyuhyun without worrying about feeling guilty to Kibum. But… Then, if you think about it, comparing to the time when we can’t even talk normally to Kyuhyun, when we’re awkward around him to now; where we can laugh and joke with him, where we can hug and ruffle his hair, don’t you think it’s worth it? Knowing that he’s smiling because of us?”
Eunhyuk went silence, a part of him comforted by Donghae’s words but another part of him is still guilty towards Kibum. He looked at Donghae, “But Kibum…”
Donghae’s body tensed at Kibum’s name. Even though he had kinda assured Eunhyuk and himself that everything is okay, it would be a lie if he said he didn’t think about Kibum. Every time he laughs with Kyuhyun, he thinks of Kibum. Every time he talks to Kyuhyun, he thinks of Kibum. Every time he’s around Kyuhyun, he thinks of Kibum.
Even when he’s dreaming of Kyuhyun, there’s also Kibum.
No matter how happy he is with Kyuhyun, how he wishes that Kyuhyun can be his (and he’s sure Eunhyuk was thinking the same), he’s still in love with Kibum. The amount of love he had for Kibum the first time he fell in love with the younger one had never lessened, not even 0.0001%. In fact, every single time, the love for Kibum just doubled up, piled up and suffocated him in a way that he’s not complaining at all.
And then there’s Kyuhyun. Kyuhyun suddenly come in and disturb the tiny circle he had with Kibum and Eunhyuk. Kyuhyun suddenly come in, crumbling the castle he had with Kibum and Eunhyuk. Kyuhyun suddenly come in; with just being Cho Kyuhyun and sneakily stole a part of his heart.
It started with a small piece, just normal affection a hyung has for his dongsaeng. Then Kyuhyun stole some more, and more, and more and Donghae found himself not knowing if he should give the last piece to Kibum or Kyuhyun.
“We have to choose in the end right?”
Eunhyuk suddenly said softly, breaking Donghae from his train of thoughts. He briefly glanced at the older dancer and held his hand,
“Yeah, I guess so…”
--
“Yeahhh~ Another free lunch from Donghae hyung~”
Kyuhyun sing-sang as he entered the practice room, Donghae following suit, a disbelieve look on his face as he checked his wallet, only to find it almost empty.
“What did you guys eat?” Ryeowook asked and before Kyuhyun could answer, Donghae cuts him off.
“What do you mean by ‘what did you guys eat’!? Kyuhyun ate everything by himself!!”
All eyes widened in disbelieve at Donghae’s outburst while Kyuhyun only giggled when Donghae whined at Leeteuk, “Hyuuuuung!! I can’t take it anymore!! I’m going to grow bald like this!! Kyuhyun is sucking my money out!!”
Leeteuk sighed but he still patted Donghae’s head comfortingly, “I don’t know what to say, Donghae-ah… You’re the one who made that bet with Kyuhyun…. You know he’s a GameKyu right? No one can beat him.”
“Buuuutt~!” Donghae pouted, “How should I know he’s going to eat that much!? He’s so skinny! Where did all the food went to!?”
“Hae, if you must know, all the food Kyuhyun ate went to his bubbly butt,” Heechul answered with a smirk as he lightly smacked the maknae’s rear, earning a surprised ‘Eeeep!’ from Kyuhyun before laughing while slinging his arm around the grumbling maknae’s shoulder.
Donghae blinked at the sentence and while the other members broke into laughter at Heechul’s remark, he was filled with jealousy. Of course he noticed Kyuhyun’s bubble butt for quite some time now and seeing Heechul smacking that ass so freely, Donghae is not happy at all.
However, unknown to the members (including Donghae), Eunhyuk was blushing furiously. The memories of what had happened between him and Kyuhyun while practicing the hip-thrust flashed in his mind. The feeling of Kyuhyun’s ass In his hands, the weird but good mixture of sweats and vanilla scent from Kyuhyun, the ticklish feelings of Kyuhyun’s messy hair, the slight shiver from Kyuhyun when he placed his hands on the maknae’s hip to the sensation he felt when the curve of Kyuhyun’s ass pressed against his growing erection.
Fuck, Eunhyuk shook his head off the thoughts. No one knows about what happened (if Kyuhyun kept it as a secret though, but he doubt that the maknae would tell the members about it), not even Donghae (the younger dancer would throw childish tantrum if he ever finds out about it) and Eunhyuk prefer to keep it that way.
He sighed, keep it down, Lee Hyukjae.
--
“Hyungs, I’m going out for a while,” Kyuhyun informed the members as he puts on his shoes and after earning the ‘okay’ and ‘take care’ from Sungmin and Ryeowook, he opened the door and was about step out of the dorm when he saw Eunhyuk and Donghae at the door.
“Oh, hyung!” Kyuhyun exclaimed with a smile.
“Hey, Kyu!” Eunhyuk greeted him back with a grin before the grin fell as both his and Donghae’s eyes scanned the maknae.
“You’re going somewhere?” Donghae asked.
“Yeah, Henli called and said that he was bored. I thought of going out with him or something.”
The two dancers nodded slowly at Kyuhyun’s words. Hiding the growing disappointment, they grinned at Kyuhyun, “You should go. Henli must be waiting for you.”
“You sounded like you want to kick me out,” Kyuhyun said jokingly and the three laughed at Kyuhyun’s words (while Donghae and Eunhyuk both think, we don’t want to kick you out. If anything, we want to keep you in. )
Biding the two dancers a goodbye, Kyuhyun left. Donghae and Eunhyuk stared at the retreating male for a moment. They thought of hanging out with Kyuhyun for the night, maybe playing some more games or just watching television, but fate is not by their side for tonight.
--
“Kuixian gege~!”
Kyuhyun smiled when Henry grinned and waved at him enthusiastically. He ruffled the younger one’s hair, Henry is very fun to hang out with. He has a bubbly personality and he knows the right thing to say in the right moment, one of the reasons why it’s easy for the Super Junior members to blend in with him the first time they met despite the difference in language and culture.
“Where should we go?” Henry asked as they walked side by side. They didn’t take the car so that they can admire the night view of Seoul. There aren’t many people, so they don’t have to worry about fans.
Kyuhyun shrugged, “I’m not sure myself. Where do you want to go?”
Henry hummed before he stopped to grin at Kyuhyun, “There’s a place I wanted to go.”
--
Eunhyuk lazily munched the chips as he watched the television. Donghae and Shindong were seating beside him while Ryeowook and Sungmin sat on the couch. The 5 of them decided to watch the latest drama together since they don’t have any schedule that night. It was the usual romantic drama and Eunhyuk was getting sleepy.
As he yawned for the umpteenth time that night, the bell of the dorm rang. He nudged Donghae, gesturing the younger dancer to open the door. However, since Donghae was too engrossed in the show, he refused to go. Rolling his eyes, Eunhyuk pushed himself up and dragged his sleepy body to the door, “Coming!’
Sighing, he opened the door, only to find Leeteuk grinning at him.
He frowned, “Hyung?”
Winking at him, Leeteuk turned half of his body, revealing a familiar male behind him.
Eunhyuk’s eyes widened, the sleepiness earlier vanished in thin air,
“Kibum…?”
--
“Ahhh~ That was so much fun!” Henry exclaimed as he skipped around, Kyuhyun laughing lightly at the younger one’s childish antics.
Then, Henry suddenly stopped, causing Kyuhyun to raise his brows in confusion, “Henli…?”
“Ge…” Henry started before he turned around and Kyuhyun frowned at the guilt on Henry’s face. “…Is it okay… If we laugh and be happy like this?”
Kyuhyun tilted his head to the side, “What do you mean?”
“….I mean… Hankyung gege is…” Henry cuts himself off and averted his gaze to the ground, eyes glassy.
Kyuhyun stared at the younger one before he sighed silently while approaching Henry. He ruffled Henry’s hair, causing the younger one to look up at him, “Yah… We promised to stop thinking about it right? If Heechul hyung hears you, he’s going to start lecturing non-stop.”
Henry sighed, a pout on his face, “But… Sometimes, I feel guilty when I think about Hankyung gege… He helped me a lot…”
“He helped all of us a lot…” Kyuhyun added softly before he smiled at Henry, “Don’t worry, I’m sure Hankyung hyung wants us to be happy.”
Henry nodded softly, “Okay…”
Chuckling, Kyuhyun removed his hand from Henry’s hair and continued walking, the younger one tailing him from behind. They shared a light conversation and light laughs, until Henry’s eyes caught something.
“What’s that?”
“What's what?” Kyuhyun asked.
“What's that,” Henry repeated, pointing to a small stall on the side of the road as he walked towards the said stall. Kyuhyun followed Henry silently, watching as the younger one observe what was sold at the stall.
He stopped besides Henry, “Just stuff… I think…”
“They’re so pretty, gege!” Henry said as he looked at the small trinkets in fascination. Kyuhyun smiled at the younger one before he lightly shook his head and absentmindedly observe the stuffs that were sold. There are small porcelain statues, rings, necklaces, trinkets and other what Kyuhyun described as ‘girl stuffs’.
As he was looking around, his eyes caught a very cute porcelain monkey and fish. A grin beamed across his face as he picked up the two statues and ran his thumbs across the delicate statues, his mind reminded about Donghae and Eunhyuk.
A thought came to him and he smiled at the old woman, “I’ll buy these.”
The woman smiled back and as she took the two porcelain statues from Kyuhyun’s hands to wrap them, his eyes caught a small, porcelain snowman and cat.
He chuckled silently as he picked them up, these suit Kibum hyung and Sungmin hyung a lot, before handing them to the older woman.
I hope they’ll like it…
--
Kyuhyun hummed to himself as he happily skipped towards the dorm. Lifting the paper bag in his hand, he grinned to himself, wishing that his hyungs would love the small presents he got for them.
I need to give these to them secretly though… The other hyungs will whine if they knew I didn’t get them anything…he thought with a smile. However, his smile fell slightly and his steps stopped when he heard laughter coming from the dorm.
What are they doing? he thought curiously as he approached the dorm. Pressing the button, he waited for the door to open. After a while, the door was opened by Yesung, who’s face brightened at seeing him.
He blinked, why is hyung so happy to see me?
“Kyuhyun-ah! Come! Come!” Yesung said as he grabbed the maknae’s arm and lightly dragged him inside. Kyuhyun stumbled as he tried to take off his shoes while Yesung dragging him, “Hyung? What’s wrong?”
“Ta-dahh!!” Yesung and the other members of Super Junior exclaimed and Kyuhyun’s eyes widened at seeing Kibum grinning and waving at him.
A grin broke across his face as he almost-run towards Kibum, “Hyung!! When did you come home!?”
Kibum laughed, “Just now. I got a week off~!”
“Really!?” Kyuhyun’s grin grew wider. He had missed Kibum and he’s happy that he can see Kibum again. And we’ll be able to hang out for a week! he thought happily.
I wonder when I’ll be able to give them the present-
“Ah, Teukie-hyung. Can I borrow Donghae hyung and Eunhyuk for three days?”
The grin on Kyuhyun’s face falters, what?
“Oh? For what?” Leeteuk asked.
Kibum smiled shyly and Kyuhyun saw how his cheeks reddened as he reached for Eunhyuk and Donghae’s hand, “I want to spend some time with them…”
A collection of whistles and whines came from the members, “Yah! You guys are so cheesy!”
The actor laughed lightly and Leeteuk smiled as he nodded while patting the younger one’s shoulder, “Sure, Kibum-ah.”
“Thanks hyung,” Kibum said before he averted his eyes to Kyuhyun. He raised his brows at the slight surprise on Kyuhyun’s face, “Kyuhyun?”
Kyuhyun blinked as he broke off his reverie, “Y-Yeah?”
“Are you okay?”
“I…” he stammered before forcing out a laugh, “Of course I’m okay! Why won’t I be okay?”
“Well, I thought you’ll be sad if I don’t spend some time with you since I was always away,” the actor smiled sheepishly and Kyuhyun gripped the paper bag in his hand tighter.
“Hyung, you think I’m desperate to spend more time with you?” Kyuhyun tried to joke and while the other members laughed at his remarks, his heart pierced by his own lie.
“I’m seriously okay, hyung. I understand you want to spend more time with you hubbies~” he shot the three a teasing smile and the other members joined in the teasing.
“Thanks, Kyu… For understanding,” Kibum said, “But it’s just for three days. After that I’m all yours,” he winked playfully and Kyuhyun’s heart throbbed.
He gripped the hidden paper bag a bit tighter, forcing a smile a bit longer, “Of course, hyung.”
Don’t say that, hyung… Don’t say something that isn’t true to me…
--
Kyuhyun silently traced his fingers across the porcelain statues situated on the nightstand beside his bed. Eunhyuk, Donghae and Kibum had departed to Jeju earlier in the morning and even though Kyuhyun had teased the three of them, even though he had shamelessly asked for souvenirs with a grin like a normal maknae, like a normal friend, his heart was in pain all the time.
Sungmin and Ryeowook had asked him if he’s okay and Kyuhyun lied, saying ‘I’m okay, hyung’ happily as if his chest is not being pressed down, choking him. He had promised himself to never depend on Sungmin anymore and since he had broken the promise he made with Sungmin, Ryeowook and himself, the promise of making sure he’s not crossing the line he’d drawn with the Kihyukhae trio, at least, he wants to keep the promise of not burdening Sungmin.
He closed his eyes when he felt tears pricked in his eyes, not wanting to cry again.
Looks like the heavy burden had come back and it’s heavier than before.
He sighed softly and buried his face into his folded arms,
“….Why….it must be me…?”