Fandom: Supernatural/Firefly
Title: Hole in the Time-Space Thing (1/?)
Author:
iluvroadrunner6Rating: FRT
Characters: Sam and Dean Winchester, Mal Reynolds, Zoe Washbourne, Kaylee Frye, Bela Talbot, Jayne Cobb
Content Warning: N/A
Summary: Someone thought it was funny to make a bit of a switcheroo...
Author's Note: For
darkmagic_luvr. It's not quite Sam/River yet (seeing as River wasn't even in this part) but I'm hoping to build up to it. Eventually. Also, I don't speak Mandarin, and I've never taken any classes, so if any of that is wrong, please feel free to correct me.
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters of Supernatural or Firefly. They're owned by FOX and the CW. However, all original characters are mine, so please do not borrow them without my permission.
Neither of the Winchesters were really sure what happened. Sam wasn’t even sure that if he did know what had happened, that he would be able to explain it to someone who had asked him. It was too-weird. One minute, they were standing out in the middle of no where, as per usual, and he and Dean had just pulled their guns on Bela, also as per usual, and then there was some kind of bright light-kind of a gold, if he really had to describe it, but he wasn’t even sure it was that-and the next thing they knew, they had four guns and a very formidable looking stick pointing in their direction, they were in a place they didn’t recognize, and Bela was nowhere to be found.
“Who the gorram hell are you and what did you do with Jayne?” The person in question who was speaking was a tall guy who looked like he was a guy in charge. But he was also dressed like a cowboy, so that was leading Sam to question whether or not he should be comfortable with this guy being in charge. Honestly? The long coat-tight pants-suspenders thing went out ages ago. And if the nice man pointing two guns at them thought dressing up like the old West in spare time was fun, well-that was his prerogative, but it wasn’t exactly putting Sam at ease. And neither was the woman at his side who was fairly intimidating and also happened to be pointing two guns at him and his brother-and Sam didn’t get intimidated easily.
“What did we do with Jayne, what did you do with Bela?” Dean spouted off before Sam could stop him, and then he paused for a minute, before shaking his head. “Never mind-whatever you did with Bela, good riddance. But we don’t have your girl Jayne.”
That statement brought some laughter from somewhere else in the room, and Dean frowned. Then came the litany in some kind of foreign language-Sam was banking on Chinese-from the man in charge, as he holstered one of his weapons and nodded to the woman next to him to do the same. Dean and Sam exchanged a confused look, before turning back to the man in front of them, still keeping their guns level.
“Was it something I said?” Dean frowned.
“Jayne ain’t a girl,” the man sighed. “He’s a man-a rather large man, in fact. The kind of man you don’t easily mistake for a girl unless you’ve only heard his name. Still don’t answer the question of who you are, and what you’re doing on my gorram ship.”
“Ship?”
Sam just shook his head, before starting to lower his gun slightly. His arm was still tense, so that he could bring it up at any moment if there was trouble, but he was starting to think that wasn’t going to be the case. “Well-I’m Sam Winchester, and this is my brother, Dean. As for what we’re doing on your ship-I have no idea. One minute we were back in Indiana and the next thing we know, we’re here.”
“What kind of ship is this, exactly?” Dean replied, his eyes darting around as he started to study the interior.
“Transport vessel-firefly class,” the leader replied, almost beaming with pride. “I call her Serenity.”
“It’s nice,” Sam replied, as he ran through the list in his head, trying to figure out what exactly a ‘firefly class’ was. “And you are?”
“Oh-right. Fair’s fair, I suppose. I’m Captain Mal Reynolds, and this is my first mate, Zoe. Guy with the stick is our Shepard, Book, and the one having a giggle fit over in the corner is our mechanic, Kaylee.”
“Hi,” ‘Kaylee’ a pretty looking girl with a wide smile said. Dean flashed her a grin, she blushed, and Sam rolled his eyes. Dean could have no idea where he was, and he would still flirt with any woman that wasn’t holding a gun in his face-except for Bela, anyway. And he was sure that was the only reason Dean wasn’t hitting on the other woman in front of them-Zoe, was her name?-was because she was holding a very nice looking rifle at him, not because he could see the wedding ring on her finger. ‘Kaylee’ was an easier target.
“Great,” Dean sighed. “Lovely to meet you all-can we stop pointing guns at each other now?”
“Not quite yet,” Mal sighed, turning back to them with a grin. “You folks say you don’t know how you got here, and I reckon that might be the case, but that still don’t change the fact that we don’t know you, you arrived here, guns blazing, and we gotta figure out what to do with you.”
“So what are you going to do with us until you figure that out?” Dean asked, keeping the gun level. Sam knew he wasn’t going to lower that gun until the other two lowered theirs, which Sam figured could probably take a while, considering the two people involved, and the position that Mal had previously stated.
Mal looked over at Zoe, and gave a small shrug. “Throw ‘em in the hold?”
“Hold sounds good to me, sir,” Zoe replied, speaking for the first time in the whole exchange.
“Hold it is.”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa-wait a second,” Dean said, giving both of them a look. “Throw us in the what?”
“In the hold,” Mal repeated. “Is that a problem?”
“Bet you ass that’s a problem,” Dean said, eyes narrowing as he straightened up slightly. “We may not know how we got here, but you can’t just throw us in the hold-whatever the hell that is-like some Goddamn prisoners!”
“Dean,” Sam began, trying to cut in.
“Well, we could just throw you out the airlock and not deal with you at all instead, if that’s more to your liking.”
At that, Sam straightened as well. “Airlock? Like-a spaceship?”
Mal and Zoe exchanged a glance again, similar to the one that Sam and Dean had exchanged earlier. “Yes a spaceship. What kind of ship did you two bai chis think you were on?”
“Hey, wait a second-what did you just call us?” Dean said, his voice dropping into a growl. “Insult me all you want, just use words that I can fuckin’ understand.”
“Idiots-what kind of ship did you two idiots think you were on?” Mal and Zoe were looking at them like their lives depended on their next answer to this question, and Sam wasn’t so sure that he wanted Dean to answer that quite yet. His temper was on a short fuse already from dealing with Bela, and Sam certainly didn’t want a brawl going if they were really in outer space.
“Uhh-” he began, looking uncertainly between the three people closest to him. “-like-a boat?”
“Gonna have to be a little more specific than that,” Mal said, keeping a level gaze on Sam that was starting to make the taller Winchester a bit uncomfortable. “Lotsa people would call Serenity here a boat too, but I have a feeling that’s not what you mean.”
“Like-a boat that goes on the water?” Sam sighed, not knowing how he could be more specific than that. He was quiet for a minute, before a lightbulb went off, somewhere, and he tilted his head to the side slightly. “What year is it?”
“Sammy, I don’t think now is the time to play twenty questions with the nice people with the guns.”
“Dean, we’re on a goddamn spaceship, do you really think we’re still in the year 2008?”
“2008?” Zoe gave them both a look, before lowering her weapon slightly. “You boys are a bit behind on the times. About five-hundred ten years, in fact.”
“Why?” Dean frowned, turning back to the first mate. “What year is it?”
“2518,” Sam answered for them, doing the math quickly in his head. “Dean, it’s 2518.”
Dean was quiet for a moment, before looking up at Mal and Zoe, “You’re not kidding, are you-about the whole space ship thing?” They both shook their heads, and Dean looked back at his brother for a minute, before turning back to them. “Jesus fucking Christ.”
Mal and Zoe blinked for a second, waiting for him to continue, and when he didn’t, Mal spoke up. “And what exactly is that supposed to mean?”
“It means that the hold is looking pretty good right about now,” Sam replied before Dean could speak up, exchanging a slightly worried glance with his brother.
***
Five hundred and ten years previously, back on Earth that Was…
“Ruttin’ gorram bitch! You fuckin’ shot me!”
Bela gave the man an annoyed look, keeping her gun level as she raised an eyebrow at him. “I barely grazed you. It will heal-it’s not like I killed you, and the language really isn’t necessary.”
There was a string of words in a strange language, mangled slightly by the man’s tendency to mumble, but she was pretty sure it was Chinese, and picking up a word or two here and there, she knew what he was saying wasn’t all together nice. “Who gives a fei xing cao dan* whether it will heal or not-doesn’t change the fact that you gorram shot me! I’m bleeding here.”
“But apparently you’re still walking-and talking for that matter,” Bela replied, giving him a look. “So I think it would be in your best interest to tell me what you did with the bloody Winchesters, before I cause you to be doing less of the former.”
The large man paused for a minute, thinking something over, before looking back at her. “If I don’t tell you where the people you’re looking for are, who I ain’t never heard of before, you’re gonna shoot me again?”
Bela rolled her eyes dramatically before nodding. “Exactly. Now why don’t you cough up the information, and then we could both go on our merry way, no further harm done.”
“Look, crazy, I don’t know what happened to your gorram friends. Why don’t you tell me what happened to my gorram ship, and we’ll go from there?”
“Ship?” Bela frowned, still keeping her gun level-the man was twice her size, after all-but starting to relax her finger on the trigger. “What the hell are you talking about-there’s no water anywhere near here?”
“Water?” the man frowned, giving her a look. “I ain’t talkin’ about no gorram water boat, I’m talking about a space ship. What idiotic planet did you grow up on?”
The man-was looking for a space ship.
The man was certifiably insane.
“I think I have all I need,” she said with a slow sigh as she started to inch her way back towards the car she came in. “I’m going to go now.”
“Oh, hell no-not after what you just did to me,” he said, starting to advance on her as he made his way closer to the car. “You’re gettin’ me outta this.”
“I’m doing no such things. And if you come any closer, I’ll call the police.”
The man seemed to swallow at that, before glancing around anxiously. Oh, perfect-he’s probably criminally insane as well as certifiably, and you were the one who shot him. Fantastic move there, Bela.
“Look-I’ll do whatever you want. Just patch me up and point me in the right direction. But I’m tellin’ you-I don’t know where your gorram friends are. Furthermore-I don’t even know where the gorram hell I am.”
She sighed heavily for a moment, before crossing her arms in front of her chest. “Who are you, exactly?”
“They call me Jayne,” he said slowly straightening up slightly. “Jayne Cobb.”
“Jayne,” she repeated slowly, before shaking her head. “I’m Lisa.” She hesitated again, before turning to him with a small frown. “Let me see what I can do for you.”
*flying fuck
Part 2