Wedding woes

[illyria_novia]

I hate weddings. For an event that lasts mere hours, it entails days of headache over what I will wear to the party, a problem exacerbated by my very pitiful wardrobe.

And speaking of wardrobes, take a sneak peek into Johnny Weir's closet. It's a lot more colorful and fascinating than mine, complete with Lenin, lynx and Louis Vuitton. There, I

Comments

[piplover]

I'm so sorry your relatives are giving you a hard time. I have to admit, I'm having trouble understanding it. If my family were to be that way I would tell them to shove it where the sun don't shine, because it is my life, and they shouldn't have a say in who I love or when I get married. I know our cultures are different, but it makes me sad.

If you had an arranged marriage, would you really have to go through with it? There would be no way to get out of it? I know family is very important, but if you are miserable and unhappy, then it is you that has been done the disservice. What a horrible thing.

I hope that everything works out, and your family will leave you alone. There's nothing wrong with being single and living your life. I hope you can continue to do so.

[illyria_novia]

The thing is I'm such a pushover. And I really want my mother to be happy. Muslim parents are said to responsible for their children until they are married properly. And I certainly am not doing anything about finding myself a husband. So while I may find the whole idea ghastly, I know my mother looking sad or hopeful will probably make me accept the whole thing and try my best to endure it. But what an idea, though. I hope I wouldn't have to make that kind of decision.

[singeaddams]

I'm sorry but I'm horrified and I have to be blunt.

What decision? It sounds like you've already made up your mind to submit to bullying, kidnap and rape to keep your mother happy. If they have so little concern for your safety I really don't see why you should care about their happiness. Do you want your daughters to suffer?

You'd better grow a spine quickly and defend your life. You're the only one that can.

[claudia603]

*pets you*

I'm sorry that you're family is being difficult. It was like that with having babies for me for years until they finally realized it wasn't going to happen (and thankfully my sister took the pressure off by spitting one out).

[illyria_novia]

I wish my sister had been here to share the ordeal. She's loads better than I am about coming up with barbed replies. And really, she's the one who's always dreaming of getting married. And she's much prettier anyway.

But anyway...I hate this kind of public terrorizing and humiliation. I wish I had the courage to just tell them to back off. But of course properly raised muslim girls would want to marry, right? Who wouldn't? There's something wrong, and impious, with you if you don't want to marry. Argh.

I'm getting bitter, sorry. *loves you*

[baranduin]

So there I am reading along, being all horrified and fascinated in equal parts ..

da da da

da da da

da da da

JOHNNY!

da da da

da da da

JOHNNY!

I wish I could send you your very own Johnny to accompany you to these sorts of events so that he could whisper catty things in your ear to your heart's content.

*hugs*

[illyria_novia]

Johnny makes almost everything right. Just the thought of him shocking the hell out of those smarmy relatives did wonder to my fortitude. *cuddles*

[illyria_novia]

Yes, that's what hurt me the most. That I am considered inferior and flawed and odd despite everything I have done with my life. I want to marry and maybe have children, but not because I have to or else. And I am happy being single and don't mind staying so until the situation changes. And in the meantime, I have so much to do. Why is my marital status more important than the things I have accomplished? Am I nothing more than a brood mare?

Sorry for ranting more, Julia. *hugs*

[aliensouldream]

You're a wonderful, warm, talented and amazing person, with fantastic accomplishments! I'm so glad you've got lots of close friends who appreciate you. And you're so valued here in LJ land. I guess the older female relatives mean well as they see it, but it's not right that they make you feel uncomfortable and unhappy. They won't be able to understand your kind of happiness and (just maybe) there is a tiny bit of jealousy or unease at your apparent freedom? You never know what people's motivations are.
I hope that you are able to continue finding happiness and fulfilment that's right for you. And Johnny Weir, of course.

*many hugs*

[illyria_novia]

*clings*

I'm not sure about jealousy, but not understanding, oh, yes. To them life as a woman is pretty straightforward, and by sticking to this path, you stay with the current, the crowd. I don't think they've ever been sidetracked by something as amazing as Johnny Weir. And Elijah Wood. And Josh Hartnett.