FIC: White (1/1) HIMYM AU

[idioticonion]

White

It's gotten bad in the last week, and it's even worse today. Everything fades out, goes blurred. Where there used to be bright colours and clarity there is now a kind of seeping numbness.

Yet at the same time, it feels like everything's speeding up. His crazy stunt at the Superbowl means that his cell phone rings all

Comments

[idioticonion]

Yeah, I wasn't sure if I should make it crystal clear at the start that he's in 2010?

But it bent my brain trying to work out how to do that without ruining the flow. A few references to Rabbit Or Duck were all I could think of.

[idioticonion]

Hehe. Nope. Although I did write a Barney-kidnapped-by-psycho story once years ago it feels like. Although it was both Barney and Ted kidnapped by a psycho!

But it's way sillier than Wrong Turn.

http://idioticonion.livejournal.com/75349.html#cutid1
http://idioticonion.livejournal.com/75882.html

[siggen1]

Oh, this is fantastic! Just, completely fantastic. Well done, you!

The dream sequences are... well, the stuff of dreams, and this:

It could be a combination of everything - ridiculous stress at work, almost getting fired, the whole flying down to the superbowl and back in twenty-four hours then working the next day. But somehow he can't stop, can't slow down, although he's now developed a permanent twitch in his cheek and he gets the shakes two or three times a day. Even though he's mainlining red bull 24/7. Even though, deep down, he knows that something is really, seriously wrong.

Just. Yeah. This is it. Fantastic.

[idioticonion]

Thank you! really, that's a lovely review. I'm so glad the dream bits worked for you because this story did seem a bit all over the place and stream-of-consciousness-y to me. Thanks for being so generous!

[da_phoenix13]

You know, Otemps and I were just discussing the it-was-all-a-dream theory this morning, as a way to explain some of the season 5 bullshit. And I would totally write my own fic-theory if school wasn't currently kicking my ass.

Anyway, this was really good! I liked the way you kept flipping between his coma-fantasy and reality, and the way you described everyone's reactions to him waking up (and how their lives had gone, with Ted marrying Stella, etc). If anything, I wish you'd expanded on the moment when he decides his dream existence was lame, because it felt like you moved on too quickly from that. But really, this was a great story. =)

[idioticonion]

To be honest, I just ran out of steam in one sitting. To expand on this would take it into multi-part madness.

But there's nothing to stop me carrying it on at some point. And yes, I KNOW I always say that.

:-)

Anyway, this was inspired by me being REALLY sleepy in bed this morning and feeling ill and not wanting to get up.

[otempora42]

Sorry this isn't a three-word special. ;) But, no, seriously, I think this is an interesting take on seasons four and five, and I loved Barney slowly realizing what had happened. And I loved the interaction with Robin! I agree with Phoe - I think the epiphany that his dream world was so lame could have been expanded, but that's my only real complaint. I really did like this a lot. :D

[idioticonion]

Ach, I just ran out of energy. PLUS had a major confidence shake about the story generally and thought it was a bit rubbish. I might actually take another stab at it now I've had both of you say the same thing.

Hmmm.

[bananacosmic]

This is brilliant! I like the confusion as to what's going on at the start - both for Barney and the reader - and then realizing that he never woke up after the bus accident, until now. Great work - but you know, it could do with a continuation ;)

[idioticonion]

Everyone's so demanding. ;-)

Maybe I'll continue it. Depends on if I get any inspiration.

My writing sucks so hard right now, I'm just trying to write random stuff as and when it interests me.