Prompts 25,26 from the table "Perspectives: Lives lived, chances taken" for spn_30snapshots
Title: "It's like Fire, like Ice"
Authorthe_milky_way
Character(s)/Pairing: Jared Padalecki (Jared/Jensen)
Theme: 09 "Perspectives: Lives lived, chances taken"
Prompt(s): 25. Writer's Choice: Fire, 26. Wine Country
Rating: PG-13
Beta: Many thanks to A.
Disclaimer: This is not true. It never happened and I don't own anything.
Summary: Jared feels strange
The house is quiet, too quiet. Maybe that’s what makes him restless, twitchy even. Even the dogs seem somewhat subdued, maybe sensing his mood and he feels a little guilty for not playing with them the whole day.
Notes:
This was written for lupina78, who wanted a continuation piece to "Lean on me, when you're not strong". It is a standalone, though, and its not really necessary to read the previous story.
This is also written for the February prompt at notjustroomates.
Jared feels strange
The house is quiet, too quiet. Maybe that’s what makes him restless, twitchy even. Even the dogs seem somewhat subdued, maybe sensing his mood and he feels a little guilty for not playing with them the whole day.
He went on a run with them of course but once they were back he send them out into the yard, into the rain even. It’s not too cold outside so he knows they love playing in the mood. He still feels guilty for being a bad puppy dad.
It’s an off-day, not only from work but apparently from his own personality as well. It’s actually a whole weekend off and he so doesn’t want to think about it, doesn’t want to think about the reason of him being here alone and not somewhere else not alone.
He sighs, snuggles closer into the peach colored plaid Logan left behind the last time he was here. It still smells like cotton candy and the soft cream Josh sent along for Logan’s skin. It smells all sweet and innocent and Jared has to smile at the memories it brings back.
He suddenly misses Logan and his shouts of childish joy when Jensen plays tickle-me with him. He misses his niece’s soft noises when she snuggles up against him during her daytime naps.
He misses Jensen.
Jared still feels a little pathetic just lying there and waiting for Jensen to come back but he can’t help but thinking things over, to mull and brood a little. It’s the perfect day to do just that. Jensen would probably kick his ass if he could see him like this, but Jensen isn’t here and Jared thinks he can indulge in a little self-pity for a while.
He wants cotton candy now; he knows there is some in a bag in one of the kitchen cabinets. Pink one even because Jensen is awesome and bought it for Jared a few days ago. It was a mock present for Valentines and they hadn’t really talked about that.
Things have been a little awkward ever since Jared couldn’t keep his mouth shut and said something that sounded stupidly like a confession of love. But how could ‘I’ll sacrifice anything for you’ taken any differently?
He had though that Jensen didn’t mind, not with the way he’d kisses Jared afterwards, how they had spent the night cuddled together and not with the way Jensen had smiled at him the next day. But apparently Jared has been wrong about it. Maybe it is all too soon, too much, too big.
Jensen has been withdrawing a little, making jokes about a huge Valentine’s dinner that never happened and which still sort of stung if Jared is honest. Deep down he'd wanted such a dinner, especially with things falling apart just a few weeks before and with Jensen suddenly being available and there. Nothing other than the cotton candy had happened, and Jensen hadn’t even commented on the candlelight-popcorn-movie-night Jared had organized.
Something went wrong somewhere. Jared doesn’t really know when and where. Jensen has been constantly talking to Danneel the last few days, breaking off every time Jared came into the room.
It hurts to think about Jensen shutting him out, more so because Jared doesn’t really know what’s going. It’s a little frustrating as well because he actually thought that they were talking again, being best friends among other things now. But now Jared is here, alone, and Jensen is out doing who knows what with Danneel who flew up yesterday.
It’s suddenly too quiet in the house and Jared doesn’t know what to do.
***
The fire in the fireplace is almost gone when Jared wakes up. He hadn’t planned on falling asleep but the last few days have been sort of draining. He groans when there is a sharp stab of pain in his neck, rolls his shoulders to relieve the tension, too loosen the muscles.
Sleeping on the couch has never been a good idea.
The room is dark, only some flickering lights are and Jared is too tired to investigate those,
He stretches out, makes noises loud enough to draw a bark from Harley, who is sitting at the end of the couch. Jared blinks, he can’t remember letting the dogs back in. He feels guilty all over again.
“Hey boy, finally learned to open the door?”
The snort that comes has him doubting his own sanity for a second there. Because yeah, Harley might sometimes look like he understands every single word Jared says to him but snorting is a bit beyond his brain’s capacity.
It’s when he turns his head that he sees the candles all over the place. It’s when his brain catches up that he smells the delicious smell of steak and baked potatoes and he knows what woke him up.
He sits up, stretches again and tries to get the kink out of his neck, all the while taking in the room and Jensen, who is standing in the doorway to the kitchen, a soft smile on his lips and all eyes on Jared.
“Hey. Thought you’d never wake up today. Everything okay?”
Jared smiles at the soft, caring tone in Jensen’s voice. It’s like he has been craving for it to slide over him in soft waves, low cadences and deep voice.
“You made dinner? For me?” Jensen never cooks.
Jensen smiles all wide now, nods and starts walking towards Jared, a sway in his walk that looks sinfully sensual and natural. Jensen sits down next to him, moves closer and kisses him softly.
Jared has missed that, hadn’t even realized that they hadn’t kissed in a few days until now. His still sleep addled brain tells him to keep quiet, to enjoy the moment but Jared has never been knows to listen to it. So when the words leave his mouth he only flinches at how needy, at how scared he sounds.
“Jensen? Are we okay? What.. What is this?”
***
They sit on the couch, in front of the fire place, knees touching, eyes firmly trained on each other. There is tension in the air but it’s not bad, it’s more cracking with want and need than with anger or annoyance.
Jared thinks he might have overreacted a little during the last few days, but shooting was hard and there were so many things to deal with. It was almost like there was no space left for rational thoughts anymore.
“Why would you think something is wrong Jay?” Jensen’s voice is rough, lazed with confusion and maybe even a little hurt. Jared feels like a jackass, like an idiot and Jensen might actually support this view.
He doesn’t really know what to say, doesn’t want to come across as even a bigger pathetic idiot than he already is. So he shrugs, looks down on his hands folded almost shyly in his lap and sighs.
This is so not him. This is nothing like him and he feels Jensen getting frustrated by it, feels Jensen’s leg muscles flex and tense. Any second now Jensen will stand up and declare this evening a total failure.
“Jared?”
Jared blinks then, dares to look at Jensen and feels guilty all over again at the confusion that greets him.
“I… don’t know. You were.. just… you were kind of…” He can’t even really say it out loud. He feels stupid, even more than he did while standing outside a shop like a good puppy, waiting for Jensen and Logan to come back out.
“I what? Jared, what is it?” Jensen sounds sad all of a sudden and Jared can see it in his eyes, can see what Jensen suddenly thinks.
“Dude no. Not that. I… you were gone the whole week, always talking to Danni, stopping when I came into the room. And I was always alone here. Had time to think. Maybe over thought stuff a little but… and then Valentine’s Day and you made a joke but it felt… I wanted…. I…” Jared huffs in frustration because really? How hard can it be to just say what he means, what he wants? It has never been a problem before. And was probably the reason why most of his relationships didn’t work out all that well in the end.
It’s a scary ability when he really thinks about it.
Jared waits for a response, for Jensen to tell him how stupid it all it or for Jensen to tell him that things really aren’t working out, that they shouldn’t have started it in the first placer. He can’t decide which option is worse.
He doesn’t expect Jensen to laugh though. Laugh like Jared has said the funniest thing in the world actually, head thrown back and guffawing out loud and face red. Jared blinks and stares, there is much all else he can do anyway. Well okay, he blushes, too.
“Oh… Oh God Jared. That’s so.. awfully teenaged-crush of you,” Jensen giggles. Actually giggles and Jared’s starting to get a little pissed off here. Jensen seems to sense that though, the laughter triggers off until it’s gone completely. The Jensen grabs his hand and pulls him closer, waits for Jared to settle in against Jensen’s hard and warm body.
“Jared. Look around. What do you see?”
Jared does and frowns a little. The candles he saw earlier are actually dark red, with some rose petals strewn across the floor around them. The table is set, with candles and flowers as well and he can see two of very expensive looking wine bottles there as well.
“Fresh from the Wine Country. From two very exclusive vineyards. Have to hold up the tradition of awfully snobbish and expensive presents for each other, don’t we?” Jensen’s breaths coast over his ear where lips are gently nibbling at the skin. Jared shivers.
This is a date. Jared’s heart beats faster with every look he takes around the room, with every new detail he takes in.
“Jen?”
Jensen just cards a hand through Jared’s hair, gently, lovingly and shrugs a little, too much to disturb Jared’s head resting against his shoulder though.
“Knew you’d be a little down today. Considering the date and all. I just thought I’d take the Valentine’s idea for this weekend instead of wasting it on a wholly commercial day. Was supposed to be a surprise, so I guess it worked. Too cheesy, right?” Jensen sounds a little unsure then and it makes Jared’s heart swell even more
“No. Not at all. It’s actually pretty sweet. Romantic. Better than me thinking you were going to break up with me.”
Jensen turns him around then, actually manhandles him into a position where he can kiss Jared so thoroughly that Jared forgets where he is. Toes curling, hands gripping Jensen hard, moaning out loud and all that. It takes Jared a few minutes afterwards to come down from his high.
“Not gonna let you go now that I have you. Do I honestly have to tell you that I love you when I have really, really good steak waiting for us? Which I cooked all by myself by the way. I slaved for you in the kitchen Padalecki.” Jared can hear the laughter in Jensen’s voice without having to look up.
“How very cliché of you Jen.” Jensen laughs again and drags Jared up, only to stop him again with a kiss. Jared smiles, still feeling a little stupid over it all. But Jensen actually said it out loud for the first time ever and Jared just can’t bring himself to doubt it. He believes it whole heartedly. He can’t help but smile at Jensen. “Love you, too. But why all the secrets?”
“Dude, have we met? Can I not tell you things?” Jensen smiles softly at him, like he knows how big this moment actually is. But like always they don’t make a big deal out of it, they just take it like it is, like it is supposed to be. It’s just them. “I had to make Danni drive to the Wine Country vineyards for the bottles man, so shut up and revel in the knowledge that I owe her now. Like she is doing right now. We have to go and watch the hockey game tomorrow.”
“We what?”
“Hockey game tomorrow. She’ll choose the team we will cheer for.” Jensen makes a face when he sits down. Jared just gapes. He knows what’s coming before Jensen even says it. “So don’t count on wearing any USA paraphernalia. And she said pouting our way out of it won’t work.”
Jared pouts.
Jensen laughs.
Jared loves him even more.
Authorthe_milky_way
Character(s)/Pairing: Jared Padalecki (Jared/Jensen)
Theme: 09 "Perspectives: Lives lived, chances taken"
Prompt(s): 25. Writer's Choice: Fire, 26. Wine Country
Rating: PG-13
Beta: Many thanks to A.
Disclaimer: This is not true. It never happened and I don't own anything.
Summary: Jared feels strange
The house is quiet, too quiet. Maybe that’s what makes him restless, twitchy even. Even the dogs seem somewhat subdued, maybe sensing his mood and he feels a little guilty for not playing with them the whole day.
Notes:
This was written for lupina78, who wanted a continuation piece to "Lean on me, when you're not strong". It is a standalone, though, and its not really necessary to read the previous story.
This is also written for the February prompt at notjustroomates.
Jared feels strange
The house is quiet, too quiet. Maybe that’s what makes him restless, twitchy even. Even the dogs seem somewhat subdued, maybe sensing his mood and he feels a little guilty for not playing with them the whole day.
He went on a run with them of course but once they were back he send them out into the yard, into the rain even. It’s not too cold outside so he knows they love playing in the mood. He still feels guilty for being a bad puppy dad.
It’s an off-day, not only from work but apparently from his own personality as well. It’s actually a whole weekend off and he so doesn’t want to think about it, doesn’t want to think about the reason of him being here alone and not somewhere else not alone.
He sighs, snuggles closer into the peach colored plaid Logan left behind the last time he was here. It still smells like cotton candy and the soft cream Josh sent along for Logan’s skin. It smells all sweet and innocent and Jared has to smile at the memories it brings back.
He suddenly misses Logan and his shouts of childish joy when Jensen plays tickle-me with him. He misses his niece’s soft noises when she snuggles up against him during her daytime naps.
He misses Jensen.
Jared still feels a little pathetic just lying there and waiting for Jensen to come back but he can’t help but thinking things over, to mull and brood a little. It’s the perfect day to do just that. Jensen would probably kick his ass if he could see him like this, but Jensen isn’t here and Jared thinks he can indulge in a little self-pity for a while.
He wants cotton candy now; he knows there is some in a bag in one of the kitchen cabinets. Pink one even because Jensen is awesome and bought it for Jared a few days ago. It was a mock present for Valentines and they hadn’t really talked about that.
Things have been a little awkward ever since Jared couldn’t keep his mouth shut and said something that sounded stupidly like a confession of love. But how could ‘I’ll sacrifice anything for you’ taken any differently?
He had though that Jensen didn’t mind, not with the way he’d kisses Jared afterwards, how they had spent the night cuddled together and not with the way Jensen had smiled at him the next day. But apparently Jared has been wrong about it. Maybe it is all too soon, too much, too big.
Jensen has been withdrawing a little, making jokes about a huge Valentine’s dinner that never happened and which still sort of stung if Jared is honest. Deep down he'd wanted such a dinner, especially with things falling apart just a few weeks before and with Jensen suddenly being available and there. Nothing other than the cotton candy had happened, and Jensen hadn’t even commented on the candlelight-popcorn-movie-night Jared had organized.
Something went wrong somewhere. Jared doesn’t really know when and where. Jensen has been constantly talking to Danneel the last few days, breaking off every time Jared came into the room.
It hurts to think about Jensen shutting him out, more so because Jared doesn’t really know what’s going. It’s a little frustrating as well because he actually thought that they were talking again, being best friends among other things now. But now Jared is here, alone, and Jensen is out doing who knows what with Danneel who flew up yesterday.
It’s suddenly too quiet in the house and Jared doesn’t know what to do.
***
The fire in the fireplace is almost gone when Jared wakes up. He hadn’t planned on falling asleep but the last few days have been sort of draining. He groans when there is a sharp stab of pain in his neck, rolls his shoulders to relieve the tension, too loosen the muscles.
Sleeping on the couch has never been a good idea.
The room is dark, only some flickering lights are and Jared is too tired to investigate those,
He stretches out, makes noises loud enough to draw a bark from Harley, who is sitting at the end of the couch. Jared blinks, he can’t remember letting the dogs back in. He feels guilty all over again.
“Hey boy, finally learned to open the door?”
The snort that comes has him doubting his own sanity for a second there. Because yeah, Harley might sometimes look like he understands every single word Jared says to him but snorting is a bit beyond his brain’s capacity.
It’s when he turns his head that he sees the candles all over the place. It’s when his brain catches up that he smells the delicious smell of steak and baked potatoes and he knows what woke him up.
He sits up, stretches again and tries to get the kink out of his neck, all the while taking in the room and Jensen, who is standing in the doorway to the kitchen, a soft smile on his lips and all eyes on Jared.
“Hey. Thought you’d never wake up today. Everything okay?”
Jared smiles at the soft, caring tone in Jensen’s voice. It’s like he has been craving for it to slide over him in soft waves, low cadences and deep voice.
“You made dinner? For me?” Jensen never cooks.
Jensen smiles all wide now, nods and starts walking towards Jared, a sway in his walk that looks sinfully sensual and natural. Jensen sits down next to him, moves closer and kisses him softly.
Jared has missed that, hadn’t even realized that they hadn’t kissed in a few days until now. His still sleep addled brain tells him to keep quiet, to enjoy the moment but Jared has never been knows to listen to it. So when the words leave his mouth he only flinches at how needy, at how scared he sounds.
“Jensen? Are we okay? What.. What is this?”
***
They sit on the couch, in front of the fire place, knees touching, eyes firmly trained on each other. There is tension in the air but it’s not bad, it’s more cracking with want and need than with anger or annoyance.
Jared thinks he might have overreacted a little during the last few days, but shooting was hard and there were so many things to deal with. It was almost like there was no space left for rational thoughts anymore.
“Why would you think something is wrong Jay?” Jensen’s voice is rough, lazed with confusion and maybe even a little hurt. Jared feels like a jackass, like an idiot and Jensen might actually support this view.
He doesn’t really know what to say, doesn’t want to come across as even a bigger pathetic idiot than he already is. So he shrugs, looks down on his hands folded almost shyly in his lap and sighs.
This is so not him. This is nothing like him and he feels Jensen getting frustrated by it, feels Jensen’s leg muscles flex and tense. Any second now Jensen will stand up and declare this evening a total failure.
“Jared?”
Jared blinks then, dares to look at Jensen and feels guilty all over again at the confusion that greets him.
“I… don’t know. You were.. just… you were kind of…” He can’t even really say it out loud. He feels stupid, even more than he did while standing outside a shop like a good puppy, waiting for Jensen and Logan to come back out.
“I what? Jared, what is it?” Jensen sounds sad all of a sudden and Jared can see it in his eyes, can see what Jensen suddenly thinks.
“Dude no. Not that. I… you were gone the whole week, always talking to Danni, stopping when I came into the room. And I was always alone here. Had time to think. Maybe over thought stuff a little but… and then Valentine’s Day and you made a joke but it felt… I wanted…. I…” Jared huffs in frustration because really? How hard can it be to just say what he means, what he wants? It has never been a problem before. And was probably the reason why most of his relationships didn’t work out all that well in the end.
It’s a scary ability when he really thinks about it.
Jared waits for a response, for Jensen to tell him how stupid it all it or for Jensen to tell him that things really aren’t working out, that they shouldn’t have started it in the first placer. He can’t decide which option is worse.
He doesn’t expect Jensen to laugh though. Laugh like Jared has said the funniest thing in the world actually, head thrown back and guffawing out loud and face red. Jared blinks and stares, there is much all else he can do anyway. Well okay, he blushes, too.
“Oh… Oh God Jared. That’s so.. awfully teenaged-crush of you,” Jensen giggles. Actually giggles and Jared’s starting to get a little pissed off here. Jensen seems to sense that though, the laughter triggers off until it’s gone completely. The Jensen grabs his hand and pulls him closer, waits for Jared to settle in against Jensen’s hard and warm body.
“Jared. Look around. What do you see?”
Jared does and frowns a little. The candles he saw earlier are actually dark red, with some rose petals strewn across the floor around them. The table is set, with candles and flowers as well and he can see two of very expensive looking wine bottles there as well.
“Fresh from the Wine Country. From two very exclusive vineyards. Have to hold up the tradition of awfully snobbish and expensive presents for each other, don’t we?” Jensen’s breaths coast over his ear where lips are gently nibbling at the skin. Jared shivers.
This is a date. Jared’s heart beats faster with every look he takes around the room, with every new detail he takes in.
“Jen?”
Jensen just cards a hand through Jared’s hair, gently, lovingly and shrugs a little, too much to disturb Jared’s head resting against his shoulder though.
“Knew you’d be a little down today. Considering the date and all. I just thought I’d take the Valentine’s idea for this weekend instead of wasting it on a wholly commercial day. Was supposed to be a surprise, so I guess it worked. Too cheesy, right?” Jensen sounds a little unsure then and it makes Jared’s heart swell even more
“No. Not at all. It’s actually pretty sweet. Romantic. Better than me thinking you were going to break up with me.”
Jensen turns him around then, actually manhandles him into a position where he can kiss Jared so thoroughly that Jared forgets where he is. Toes curling, hands gripping Jensen hard, moaning out loud and all that. It takes Jared a few minutes afterwards to come down from his high.
“Not gonna let you go now that I have you. Do I honestly have to tell you that I love you when I have really, really good steak waiting for us? Which I cooked all by myself by the way. I slaved for you in the kitchen Padalecki.” Jared can hear the laughter in Jensen’s voice without having to look up.
“How very cliché of you Jen.” Jensen laughs again and drags Jared up, only to stop him again with a kiss. Jared smiles, still feeling a little stupid over it all. But Jensen actually said it out loud for the first time ever and Jared just can’t bring himself to doubt it. He believes it whole heartedly. He can’t help but smile at Jensen. “Love you, too. But why all the secrets?”
“Dude, have we met? Can I not tell you things?” Jensen smiles softly at him, like he knows how big this moment actually is. But like always they don’t make a big deal out of it, they just take it like it is, like it is supposed to be. It’s just them. “I had to make Danni drive to the Wine Country vineyards for the bottles man, so shut up and revel in the knowledge that I owe her now. Like she is doing right now. We have to go and watch the hockey game tomorrow.”
“We what?”
“Hockey game tomorrow. She’ll choose the team we will cheer for.” Jensen makes a face when he sits down. Jared just gapes. He knows what’s coming before Jensen even says it. “So don’t count on wearing any USA paraphernalia. And she said pouting our way out of it won’t work.”
Jared pouts.
Jensen laughs.
Jared loves him even more.