Question

Aug 06, 2008 00:45



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baldapple August 5 2008, 17:55:57 UTC
"Are you willing to accept that and "share" your spouse?"

NO F-ING WAY!

Hmmmm, I'm a selfish girl, no way I'd ever share.

I guess you could love 2 people simultaneously, but that'd be pretty messy. And besides, wouldn't you feel guilty all the time?

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hyperoma August 5 2008, 18:01:01 UTC
Haha I suppose I was saying it like.. if it happened openly. I mean, the only reason you would feel guilty.. it'll be because you're "loving someone else". If love didn't work in the way of say.. it can only involve a pair, you wouldn't need to feel guilty.

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baldapple August 5 2008, 18:04:26 UTC
Hmmmm, well I guess it wouldn't be so hard to live with, but I still wouldn't share. I want my love to be "private", as in just the two of us. Know what I mean?

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mairelys August 5 2008, 18:08:14 UTC
I totally understand that. I personally went through an EXTREMELY jealous faze, and while I knew I was being irrational so I didn't share my feelings all the time, I used to get jealous when my ex even SPOKE to other women, especially when they were flirting with him and he didn't mind as he knew it was harmless.

For the sharing of love thing to work, both people would have to be honest about their intentions from the begining of the relationship as its definitely not for everyone.

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mairelys August 5 2008, 18:02:07 UTC
It's so funny that you write this, because I'm questioning this myself right now.

I've always considered myself extremely loyal and hated cheating and anyone who cheated.. but you know, I'm starting to think that it was just that I didn't like the part of me that felt this way. Now... I'm not sure that I believe in an 'eternal' love and I'm not sure that we were meant to be monogomous beings, or if it's just what society has decided.

I'm in love with my ex and it's a love I know I will never get over. But I'm not sure that I would be happy spending my life with him... a part of me would and can't live without him, and a part of me is restless and would get tired of not being fulfilled as I don't think he can love me the way I need. I love my current boyfriend but not in the same intense way, he's so perfect for me and deserves to be love and cared for as he's a great guy, but I don't know that I can love him in the way he needs. I'm not ready to chose one (as in chose forever, I'm only with one) but I'm also not ready to give up ( ... )

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hyperoma August 5 2008, 18:14:00 UTC
Do you think that you're loving your current boyfriend just because he is perfect for you and deserves your love?

Yeah.. I can't stand the thought of knowing someone I love loving another. I think it'll be kinda amazing if I could though.. It makes everything simpler, doesn't it? Hahaha, but it's kinda selfish to think that way too.

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mairelys August 5 2008, 19:43:42 UTC
I definitely think that's part of it.
I feel like we're such a good match that how could I throw that away? It sucks that we all just don't automatically love the people who treat us the best, because it does seem that nice guys do finish last a lot.

It's definitely a selfish thing too, but I mean all societies didn't have monogmy, and even now it's 'acceptable' in that it's accepted and not necessarily thought of as right to have 'adventures' when you're married. I don't know though... that way also seem to be drama-filled and a headache... It's all so complicated! :P

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hyperoma August 7 2008, 07:24:29 UTC
Yes, I've been in situations where I choose the "bad" guy but for some reason, I just can't bring myself to develop any feelings for the "good" guy. Destiny likes to play tricks with us, don't it?

It truly is very complicated!

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_citynoise August 5 2008, 18:27:04 UTC
i won't lie, i cheated on my boyfriend (ex ( ... )

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hyperoma August 7 2008, 07:28:33 UTC
I will honestly say I did the same thing. I can't bring myself to cheat on someone I love. & basically, yeah I agree with most of the things you've said.

I always end up as the "third party"! But I don't know how long I can hold out for... waiting for someone to break someone else's heart. I mean, I am the one that interfered, right? I feel really bad for the other party.

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hyperoma August 7 2008, 07:29:23 UTC
Do you think that love is everlasting then?

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hyperoma August 7 2008, 15:52:50 UTC
Yeah, compromising is very very important. Like I said to many people, relationships take more than love to work.

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anonymous August 6 2008, 07:12:12 UTC
Well, i've totally experinced the whole "What if you're in love with someone who is in love with 2?" - part. It was super hurting because he did things behind my back and stuff y'know? And to only find this out MONTHS later. A broken heart, of course. I forgiven him because i love him too much. )): But that has been awhile ago. Now, we're doing fine. Sometimes i can be super insecured about our relationship, but then again, love is a leap of faith. ((:

For the "Have you loved 2 people at the same time?" - part, i somehow did too. Because when that above happened, there was my ex who kept being there for me, listening me out, etc and sometimes it's nice to feel wanted and stuff. I love it that he was always always there, but not love him as being my other half kind.

It's always nice to be loved more than to love someone more. But then again, being in a rs just because he/she loves you more, isnt true love at all, isnt it? ((:

Take care now, jolene.
xoxo.

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hyperoma August 7 2008, 07:33:53 UTC
That is pretty amazing. I can't really forgive cheaters. Once bitten, twice shy. And sad to say, these people are everywhere...

I supppose what you had for your ex was a different sort of love then? Maybe you just loved the company, than his person?

Yeah, that is why I always feel like I'm the one who loves more! Haha, unfair to other people's eyes but life is never fair, is it?

:)

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