(no subject)
Title: Five moments in search of a plot
Characters: Hyoutei
Rating: G
Disclaimer: Konomi-sensei no PoT desu.
A.N.: These were written for nozomi_chan.
Popcorn
The regulars were sitting around Atobe's living room for his yearly movie marathon. The current movie was Jiroh's choice -- The Empire Strikes Back. Jiroh was lying on the floor, eyes wide, raptly staring at the screen as Lando Calrissian sold out Han and Leia to the dark side.
Yuushi held Gakuto under an arm. Gakuto was practically in his lap, but nobody was really looking at them. Perhaps the rest of the team was used to their outrageous PDA at this point. Yuushi used the excuse of movie day for a prolonged cuddle marathon, not that he usually needed an excuse. His arm wasn't even getting tired.
Han Solo was about to be encased in Carbonite. Han glanced up at Leia, and Leia looked back at him, expression tender and terrified, clearly trying to encompass a whole relationship in a few short words.
"I love you," Yuushi murmured into Gakuto's ear, along with Leia.
"I know," Gakuto snarked back, along with Han.
Their eyes met, Yuushi's with a hint of Leia's tears, Gakuto's with a bit of Han's amusement.
"Gag me," said Shishido, and popcorn landed on Oshitari's hair.
"Yeah," said Jiroh, "Stop talking along with the film."
~
The Case of the Missing Choco
It was happening all over Hyoutei. People found that their secret stashes of chocolate were being stolen -- but selectively. The bags of M&Ms were left behind, but the big, rich chocolate eggs were taken. Only the best chocolate from everyone's stash was lifted, except when it came to Atobe. In his case, his entire drawer of chocolate was taken.
"As team tensai, I think you should do something about this," Atobe said to Oshitari, arms crossed and eyes flashing.
Oshitari shuddered. It was near the full moon, and Atobe got downright moody if he didn't have enough chocolate around. "I'll do what I can," Oshitari promised. "Show me the scene of the crime."
But when Oshitari got there, he found that two other investigators were staring at the open drawer.
"Look," said Ohtori to Gakuto, pointing. "It's a clue!"
"Jeepers, Shaggy," Gakuto responded with a tinge of exasperation, "it's just a hair. Who knows when it got there?"
Ohtori held it up. Short, curly, sandy-colored.
"Aha!" said Oshitari, "Golden week is coming up! Follow me!"
The "Scoobie" gang ran after Oshitari as he pounded down the hallway toward a certain dorm room. He flung open the door -- and there, next to a huge pile of untouched candy, sat Jiroh.
"I would've had almost enough for Bunta's visit if it hadn't been for you meddling kids," Jiroh snarled, as Atobe confiscated the entire stash.
~
Two sound theories
They were all staring at the instructor, the entire team of regulars.
Nakamura-sensei was holding up a pointer to rest against a tasteful line drawing of a woman's nether regions.
"And this part is called the 'mons'," Nakamura looked around to see why there was such utter silence. Whenever he gave this talk to middle school boys, he expected at least a little sniggering.
But the regulars were all simply staring back at him, their foreheads furrowing. Shishido was mid-yawn.
"What?" Nakamura asked, a little nervously.
Gakuto raised his hand.
"Yes, Mukahi?"
"Well. Er. That is. We're all gay. So, uh, can we skip on ahead to the male reproductive system?"
The room resounded with enthusiastic assents, heads nodding.
Nakamura's eyes went wide. "What -- ALL of you are gay? That can't be, the chances are so incredibly --"
“Except for me,” Jiroh butted in. “I’m not gay.”
Someone coughed, and the cough might’ve sounded like “Marui.”
Jiroh glared.
“Settle down,” said Nakamura.
Atobe shrugged and nodded. "We think it's the water in the clubhouse."
Nakamura's eyes narrowed. "Wait. Who's the tennis club advisor again?"
~
The Use of Force
Jiroh awoke to find himself lying somewhere dark and strange-smelling. Where was he? He tried to sit up, but his head hit heavy cloth. What? Huh, someone's jeans. Hanging on his head. ...Oh, right. He'd fallen asleep in Hiyoshi's closet while trying to find that shirt Hiyoshi said he could borrow. Damn.
Jiroh pushed himself upright, seeking blindly in the dark for the door. He spotted a keyhole. His hand rose toward the knob when he blinked. Huh...
Oh my.
From his slightly skewed perspective it looked a whole lot like Ohtori had Hiyoshi's arms pinned, with Shishido between his legs.
"It hurts!" Hiyoshi was protesting, struggling a little against Ohtori's hands. Was Hiyoshi naked? His chest definitely was, although a chair blocked most of Jiroh's view of the bed. Shishido still had his clothes on.
"Hentai!" Jiroh wrinkled his nose. Did he really have to sit through this? He was about to turn the doorknob when Shishido spoke.
"I know it hurts, but if I jiggle it out, and then in a little, it'll be easier to slip through," Shishido said, voice strained with concentration.
Jiroh rolled his eyes. Gay threesomes were a little heavy for post-nap viewing fare. He mostly wanted to get out of the closet to see if he missed the latest episode of Morning Musume Madness.
Jiroh went to turn the knob again when Ohtori spoke. Ohtori's voice was quiet, sweet, calming, comforting. "It’s in really deep, but you're doing so well, Wakashi. Just a little more and he’ll be done."
"NNNNhhhh..." Hiyoshi sounded like he really was in pain.
Jiroh frowned. Gay threesome rape was right out. He opened the door and strode forward, fists on his hips.
"Hey," Jiroh said in his most annoyed voice, staring at the three on the bed.
"...And it's out," Shishido said, holding up a splinter in a pair of tweezers.
“Thanks,” Hiyoshi said with relief.
Jiroh’s next sentence stopped halfway out of his mouth.
The three on the bed stared at him.
"Oh, hey, Jiroh," Hiyoshi said, squirming out from under Shishido. "Did you find that shirt?"
~
Moon Time
Atobe frowned. It was the night of the full moon, and he felt restless. He'd already consumed his chocolate, but since this was the second full moon of the month, he'd depleted his store. There wasn't enough...
Atobe prowled down the hall. If Marui Bunta was visiting, he knew where to find more chocolate.
He knocked on Jiroh's door. "Open up," Atobe growled.
"I'm not here," said a voice from the other side of the door.
Atobe snorted. "My. How clever of you to notice your own absence. Is this a metaphysical state, then, since it isn't corporeal?"
Giggling from the other side of the door and a whispered voice. "Is he always this pompous?"
"I heard that," Atobe growled, and took out his special key. It opened every door at Hyoutei except for one. When he opened the door, he saw two figures lying on one of Jiroh's beds. They were surrounded by a huge heap of trash.
Wrappers. For candy. Whoppers, snickers, pocky, strange candy that Atobe had never heard of. Chocolate bars by the dozens...
"What happened here?"
Marui gave another exhausted giggle. "We had some chocolate."
"I see that." Atobe stared at them.
Jiroh raised his hand in a weak wave. "We jumped on the beds a lot. Now we're tired."
"My god. Are you two really in middle school?" Atobe snorted with the superiority of someone who knew about better things to do with his time than eat candy.
Jiroh blew a raspberry. Marui opened his eyes wide. "And why are you here?" Marui inquired, with the disrespect for rank that people seemed to have over at Rikkaidai.
Atobe couldn't very well admit to coming for the chocolate now. He turned to go.
"He came for the chocolate," Jiroh said cheerfully. "If he doesn't get enough chocolate on full-moon nights, he turns into a raging..."
"Enough. I see that you have none to spare," Atobe said in his most chilling voice.
"No. I have one more," Jiroh said with glee, holding it up. "I cleared out the vending machines. And it's the last bar of chocolate in the whole building."
Marui eyed it with no small lust.
"So. What would you two do for the last bar of chocolate at Hyoutei?" Jiroh's voice was wicked, wicked.
~
Characters: Hyoutei
Rating: G
Disclaimer: Konomi-sensei no PoT desu.
A.N.: These were written for nozomi_chan.
Popcorn
The regulars were sitting around Atobe's living room for his yearly movie marathon. The current movie was Jiroh's choice -- The Empire Strikes Back. Jiroh was lying on the floor, eyes wide, raptly staring at the screen as Lando Calrissian sold out Han and Leia to the dark side.
Yuushi held Gakuto under an arm. Gakuto was practically in his lap, but nobody was really looking at them. Perhaps the rest of the team was used to their outrageous PDA at this point. Yuushi used the excuse of movie day for a prolonged cuddle marathon, not that he usually needed an excuse. His arm wasn't even getting tired.
Han Solo was about to be encased in Carbonite. Han glanced up at Leia, and Leia looked back at him, expression tender and terrified, clearly trying to encompass a whole relationship in a few short words.
"I love you," Yuushi murmured into Gakuto's ear, along with Leia.
"I know," Gakuto snarked back, along with Han.
Their eyes met, Yuushi's with a hint of Leia's tears, Gakuto's with a bit of Han's amusement.
"Gag me," said Shishido, and popcorn landed on Oshitari's hair.
"Yeah," said Jiroh, "Stop talking along with the film."
~
The Case of the Missing Choco
It was happening all over Hyoutei. People found that their secret stashes of chocolate were being stolen -- but selectively. The bags of M&Ms were left behind, but the big, rich chocolate eggs were taken. Only the best chocolate from everyone's stash was lifted, except when it came to Atobe. In his case, his entire drawer of chocolate was taken.
"As team tensai, I think you should do something about this," Atobe said to Oshitari, arms crossed and eyes flashing.
Oshitari shuddered. It was near the full moon, and Atobe got downright moody if he didn't have enough chocolate around. "I'll do what I can," Oshitari promised. "Show me the scene of the crime."
But when Oshitari got there, he found that two other investigators were staring at the open drawer.
"Look," said Ohtori to Gakuto, pointing. "It's a clue!"
"Jeepers, Shaggy," Gakuto responded with a tinge of exasperation, "it's just a hair. Who knows when it got there?"
Ohtori held it up. Short, curly, sandy-colored.
"Aha!" said Oshitari, "Golden week is coming up! Follow me!"
The "Scoobie" gang ran after Oshitari as he pounded down the hallway toward a certain dorm room. He flung open the door -- and there, next to a huge pile of untouched candy, sat Jiroh.
"I would've had almost enough for Bunta's visit if it hadn't been for you meddling kids," Jiroh snarled, as Atobe confiscated the entire stash.
~
Two sound theories
They were all staring at the instructor, the entire team of regulars.
Nakamura-sensei was holding up a pointer to rest against a tasteful line drawing of a woman's nether regions.
"And this part is called the 'mons'," Nakamura looked around to see why there was such utter silence. Whenever he gave this talk to middle school boys, he expected at least a little sniggering.
But the regulars were all simply staring back at him, their foreheads furrowing. Shishido was mid-yawn.
"What?" Nakamura asked, a little nervously.
Gakuto raised his hand.
"Yes, Mukahi?"
"Well. Er. That is. We're all gay. So, uh, can we skip on ahead to the male reproductive system?"
The room resounded with enthusiastic assents, heads nodding.
Nakamura's eyes went wide. "What -- ALL of you are gay? That can't be, the chances are so incredibly --"
“Except for me,” Jiroh butted in. “I’m not gay.”
Someone coughed, and the cough might’ve sounded like “Marui.”
Jiroh glared.
“Settle down,” said Nakamura.
Atobe shrugged and nodded. "We think it's the water in the clubhouse."
Nakamura's eyes narrowed. "Wait. Who's the tennis club advisor again?"
~
The Use of Force
Jiroh awoke to find himself lying somewhere dark and strange-smelling. Where was he? He tried to sit up, but his head hit heavy cloth. What? Huh, someone's jeans. Hanging on his head. ...Oh, right. He'd fallen asleep in Hiyoshi's closet while trying to find that shirt Hiyoshi said he could borrow. Damn.
Jiroh pushed himself upright, seeking blindly in the dark for the door. He spotted a keyhole. His hand rose toward the knob when he blinked. Huh...
Oh my.
From his slightly skewed perspective it looked a whole lot like Ohtori had Hiyoshi's arms pinned, with Shishido between his legs.
"It hurts!" Hiyoshi was protesting, struggling a little against Ohtori's hands. Was Hiyoshi naked? His chest definitely was, although a chair blocked most of Jiroh's view of the bed. Shishido still had his clothes on.
"Hentai!" Jiroh wrinkled his nose. Did he really have to sit through this? He was about to turn the doorknob when Shishido spoke.
"I know it hurts, but if I jiggle it out, and then in a little, it'll be easier to slip through," Shishido said, voice strained with concentration.
Jiroh rolled his eyes. Gay threesomes were a little heavy for post-nap viewing fare. He mostly wanted to get out of the closet to see if he missed the latest episode of Morning Musume Madness.
Jiroh went to turn the knob again when Ohtori spoke. Ohtori's voice was quiet, sweet, calming, comforting. "It’s in really deep, but you're doing so well, Wakashi. Just a little more and he’ll be done."
"NNNNhhhh..." Hiyoshi sounded like he really was in pain.
Jiroh frowned. Gay threesome rape was right out. He opened the door and strode forward, fists on his hips.
"Hey," Jiroh said in his most annoyed voice, staring at the three on the bed.
"...And it's out," Shishido said, holding up a splinter in a pair of tweezers.
“Thanks,” Hiyoshi said with relief.
Jiroh’s next sentence stopped halfway out of his mouth.
The three on the bed stared at him.
"Oh, hey, Jiroh," Hiyoshi said, squirming out from under Shishido. "Did you find that shirt?"
~
Moon Time
Atobe frowned. It was the night of the full moon, and he felt restless. He'd already consumed his chocolate, but since this was the second full moon of the month, he'd depleted his store. There wasn't enough...
Atobe prowled down the hall. If Marui Bunta was visiting, he knew where to find more chocolate.
He knocked on Jiroh's door. "Open up," Atobe growled.
"I'm not here," said a voice from the other side of the door.
Atobe snorted. "My. How clever of you to notice your own absence. Is this a metaphysical state, then, since it isn't corporeal?"
Giggling from the other side of the door and a whispered voice. "Is he always this pompous?"
"I heard that," Atobe growled, and took out his special key. It opened every door at Hyoutei except for one. When he opened the door, he saw two figures lying on one of Jiroh's beds. They were surrounded by a huge heap of trash.
Wrappers. For candy. Whoppers, snickers, pocky, strange candy that Atobe had never heard of. Chocolate bars by the dozens...
"What happened here?"
Marui gave another exhausted giggle. "We had some chocolate."
"I see that." Atobe stared at them.
Jiroh raised his hand in a weak wave. "We jumped on the beds a lot. Now we're tired."
"My god. Are you two really in middle school?" Atobe snorted with the superiority of someone who knew about better things to do with his time than eat candy.
Jiroh blew a raspberry. Marui opened his eyes wide. "And why are you here?" Marui inquired, with the disrespect for rank that people seemed to have over at Rikkaidai.
Atobe couldn't very well admit to coming for the chocolate now. He turned to go.
"He came for the chocolate," Jiroh said cheerfully. "If he doesn't get enough chocolate on full-moon nights, he turns into a raging..."
"Enough. I see that you have none to spare," Atobe said in his most chilling voice.
"No. I have one more," Jiroh said with glee, holding it up. "I cleared out the vending machines. And it's the last bar of chocolate in the whole building."
Marui eyed it with no small lust.
"So. What would you two do for the last bar of chocolate at Hyoutei?" Jiroh's voice was wicked, wicked.
~