Bear Poll

[hylandr]

I've seen a few people post about bear stuff in the last month or so and thought I'd pull this poll together. It's mainly for the guys but women familiar with bear stuff can feel free to answer the optinion questions.

Poll Bear Essentials

Comments

[hylandr]

I'm glad you did too. :) LJ us a great way to meet people and get to know them... as well as you can online anyway.

The "bear community" has definitely become everything that it was created to counter. It's very exclusive and opinionated and often looks down on others the way people looked down on bears. I guess I (and a lot of people) sort of use what the bear community has to see and meet friends while trying to stay as much outside it as possible. (After being berates for liking non-bears, I lost all interest in bear groups and the "community".) I know a lot of people use stuff like Bear411 for sex and I'll admit I have a slightly revealing pic there (in my underwear) and will flirt too but I've never hooked up with someone from there and really just use it to chat with friends and meet people. (I'm a big flirt anywhere, so why not there to? ;) )

[tyresias]

I see bear has having more to do with one's gender (presentation) than one's sexual orientation and as an umbrella term I don't see it having much to do with body weight. eg I'd love to just say I was a bear, because I'm hairy and I love it, but so many people say I'm too skinny and therefore I'm a cub/otter/wolfe (I prefer wolfe 1st, otter 2nd and cub never) but I see all 3 as being subsections of bear, really.

I guess I wish there was an overarching word (I'd be fine with it being bear) and then the term for the bigger guys along with wolfe, otter, cub, etc... If bear is the term for bigger guys than we need a new overarching word (much like gay used to be but had that function replaced by the word queer) under wich bear falls along side cub, otter, wolfe. But Furry is already taken (and it means something totally different) so I don't know what to suggest.

[hylandr]

In a way, the results are showing a lot of what I expected and what's come from conversations with others -- either bear refers to way to much or abolutely nothing. The definitions of bear and cub... well... aren't defined. If something means different things to everyone than what worth is the word? To some, it's the fat hairy image that's usually shown, to others it's about attitude, not look, and to others it could be anyone who wants to call themselves a bear which could be a 6' tall, 120#, totally hairless person with none of what people might call "a bear attitude". Who knows who out there might even consider the option that a woman could call herself a bear

[detailbear]

I've been using "bearfolk" as the overarching word meaning "guys identifying with the bear thing" (movement, club, phenonmenon, marketing niche). I also use the bear/cub/otter/grizzly/polar bear/behr distinctions when describing physical types ("John is the otter over there talking to his partner Joe, the polar bear.") but let people describe themselves as whatever they want.

[magnusarias]

I could catch slack for this one, but I do believe that there are minimum requirements to fall into the "bear" label. Do you have to be hairy? I'd say kinda, maybe not body hair, but maybe facial hair? As for build, I know plenty of scrawny guys who label themselves as bears/cubs. That's where I think more of the attitude involved. So I guess for me, there are a list of requirements and if you can check off 2 of them then sure, join the bunch :) If not, join anyways cause I'm still of the "non-exclusive bear community" mentality

[hylandr]

Thanks. :)

Yeah, the bear movement was sort of created as a support thing for guys who weren't the "ideal" of what gays were supposed to like. It's moved too far away from that though and can often be it's own form of elitist environment. Now bears can have their own "ideal" to judge people against. I've heard that many chasers feel uncomfortable because they don't fit the bear mold and many bears can become even more image self-conscious.

[detailbear]

Back when I was President of the London (ON) group, I developed some stock phrases, like "a Cub is a younger, smaller or less experienced Bear" and "beards, size and body hair are easy physical identifiers for many Bears, but it's mostly about the attitude". If I get confused looks, I sometimes point out that "top" and "bottom" each have three meanings (position, dominance, activity) which quite often correspond, but that you can have a big, young, dominant "cub" as easily as you have a dominant, passive, insertee "bottom".

I still tend to think that cuddly demeanor, love of comfort and acceptance of others are better indicators of bearishness than beard, belly and body hair. If someone picks at their food, doesn't like to hug anyone and has rigid definitions of "Bear", then I'm less likely to believe that they are one. (Slight irony in that sentence is recognized.)

As a shorthand for physical type, bear, cub, otter, grizzly, behr and polar bear are useful (note the lower case). "Wolf" always seems to have a personality

[majai_of_dreams]

Refresh my memory, what is an otter again?

[hylandr]

Someone who is thin but furry.