Fic: Teaboy
Title: Teaboy (With apologies to the Brothers Grimm)
Series: Torchwood/Doctor Who - kind of
Characters: Ianto, Owen, Gwen, Tosh, Jack, The Doctor, Rhys, Andy
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: A little bit of everything
Beta: luvinthe88and20
Disclaimer: I do not own Torchwood, Doctor Who,or the characters therein, they belong to the BBC and RTD. Any original characters and places are my property.
Summary: Will the poor little teaboy be allowed to go to The Ball?
Author's Note: This was written for National Tell A Fairy Tale Day (February 26th). I did this last year as well. ( Doctor Who story can be found here.) This year, thanks to the plotbunny that paxieamor threw at me, I have modified the Cinderella story to fit amongst Torchwood. There was even visual aids. Enjoy!
Teaboy
(With apologies to the Brothers Grimm)
The husband of a very rich woman fell sick, and as he felt his end drawing near, he called his only son to his bedside. He placed a hand on the young boy’s head, smiling weakly at little Ianto.
“Dear child, be good, be good and pious, and then the good God will always protect thee.” It was then that the young boy’s father closed his eyes and departed.
Little Ianto Jones was dressed in a small suit and sat watch by his father’s grave, Only when everyone had left did he cry for his father. He would wait by the grave, keeping watch as winter came to Cardiff. Soon spring had sprung once more and his mother had married another.
Owen Harper was the Duke of Splott, and brought to the household two daughters. Gwen and Tosh were both vile and black of heart, and the three of them began to make life horrible for little Ianto.
“Should the little idiot even sit by us?” said they.
“If he wants to even stay in this house, he must earn his keep,” Owen sneered.
They took away his nice clothes, his ties and waistcoats, giving them to a beggar-boy on the street. Gwen disappeared and brought back a soiled jumper from a rubbish heap in Splott, while Tosh whipped at him a ratty pair of trousers her friend Tommy had left behind.
“Just look at how proud the little prince is now,” Owen crowed, as he dragged Ianto into the kitchen.
There he had to do all kinds of hard work. Ianto was often the first one up in the morning and the last one to go to bed at night. He had to make breakfast, lunch and dinner, divine exquisite teas for guests, light the fireplace, draws baths for his sisters, lug home electronic equipment for Tosh, and keep Gwen out of trouble with the police. As if that wasn’t bad enough, they never let him drink his own coffee, spilling the beans across the floor, leaving him with tea. Poor teaboy.
In the evening, when Ianto was weary and exhausted - when Gwen was done mocking him and Tosh had finished experimenting on him, when Owen was satisfied that Ianto had done all the filing and paperwork - then he was allowed to make his way down the steps, under the ground. There he could sleep amongst the mechanics of the water pump for the small fountain in front of the house.
One day, his mother was going away on a trip to talk at a University, for she was quite smart but was never home enough to see the life her son now led. She gathered the children before her and asked them each what they wanted.
“I want the best clothes, made of silk, and tons of jewelry to make the boys go mental,” Gwen cried with glee.
“I want the latest computation program from the top scientist in the world on a gold disc,” Tosh stated.
“Whatever you see along the road that looks interesting will be fine Mum,” Ianto said quietly.
So the mother left on her lecture trip, leaving Ianto to take care of the house, the estate, and to see that all the needs of Owen, Gwen and Tosh were met. Mother eventually returned, bringing tons of clothes, but only a carat worth of diamonds for pouty Gwen. Tosh received the second best computation program and stalked off to her room to sulk. Owen was upset that his wife had returned at all and his other interests could no longer stay in his bed.
For Ianto, she handed a small thing that looked almost like a pebble. It was made from an unusual metal. She said she had found it amongst some scrabble on Mermaid Quay. Ianto thanked her and hurried off to his subterranean hideaway. It was there that he found that whatever he wished for he would get. The taste of the best espresso on the planet that was his alone was enough to make him smile in utter happiness.
It happened that one day, the King, who had no daughters of his own to give, was hosting a black tie ball in honor of Prince Jack of Boeshane as he searched for a bride. The Duke of Splott swelled with pride when the household received its invitation. Owen was determined to have one of his daughters win the hand, and all the other bits, of Prince Jack.
Ianto was made to work non-stop. Since Gwen had gained some weight, he had to go from shop to shop to find her a new ball gown. He had to tailor Tosh’s slinky blue number so she showed off enough leg for Prince Jack. Owen made Ianto measure his inseam three times and fix his trousers while he still wore them. He had to do the girl’s hair, and make them all properly caffeinated so they would last until the wee hours of the morning.
“Do I get to go?” Ianto asked Owen expectantly. He doubted he would find any love at the Ball, but it would be nice to not have to clean up anyone else’s trash for once. “The invitation said everyone in the family was invited.”
“How do you know that?” Owen bellowed.
“I know everything,” Ianto stated. “And it said so on the bottom of the invite.”
“Fuck no,” Owen said, poking Ianto in the chest. “Look at what a fucking mess you are.”
Owen turned around, about to set the house alarm so Ianto couldn’t even leave his underground lair that night. Ianto took his chance, aiming the gun he had hidden in his back waistband at Owen. Owen turned and sneered at him.
“Put that away little boy,” Owen said. “You wouldn’t dare.”
Before another second could pass, Ianto pulled the trigger, hitting Owen in the left shoulder. Owen clutched at his shoulder, sagging against the computer station Tosh had set-up.
“Shit!”
“Can I go to the Ball now?” Ianto asked.
“There is a mass of glowing inchworms that are creeping along the walkways at the Plass. I cannot attend, and thusly none of my family can go, unless they are all picked up.” Owen smirked at him. “Duties of the Duke and all that. I can’t see that it is done with my arm like this,”
Ianto sighed and took the family’s SUV to the Plass. Taking a box and a pair of tongs from the boot, he chased down every alien inchworm that he could find around the Millennium Centre. Hurrying back to the house, he noticed all was quiet. Picking up a note from Owen, he read that they had left without him, so that Ianto wouldn’t try killing him again.
“I was aiming for your shoulder,” Ianto mumbled as he dejectedly tromped downstairs to his meager means in the basement.
Leaning up against the cold wall, Ianto dug out the magical stone his mother had brought him. He slumped down to the floor, feeling the unearthly warmth from the stone. All he had wanted to do was get away from work for one night. Maybe meet a nice girl. No one had been nice to him since he had left school. Even his best friend Lisa had stopped emailing and texting him. As far as he knew she was dead. Ianto wished with all his heart that he could have gone to the ball for Prince Jack as he fell asleep on the cold concrete.
“Well… Well… Well… How do you do?” a voice said from above him.
Ianto opened his eyes and was startled to see a man standing there in a brown pinstriped suit. The man smiled at Ianto and stuffed his hands into his trouser pockets. The stranger crouched down next to Ianto as he pulled out a pair of spectacles. He peered through them at Ianto.
“You’re a right mess, aren’t you?” the stranger said.
“Who are you?” Ianto asked as he pushed himself up the wall.
“Oh, I haven’t introduced myself yet, have I?” the stranger asked as he stood up as well. “Right then, you can just call me The Doctor. Let's see now, you wanted to go to the ball the King is hosting for Prince Jack of Boeshane- Boeshane, Boe, Boe, I once knew a man, well I guess you could say man hew was rather more like just a big head, he was called the Face of Boe, but that’s neither here or there,” The Doctor said. “What we need to do is get you ready for this Ball.”
“Uh, sorry Doctor, but it’s a black-tie affair. I don’t own a suit anymore, just these rags and sweats,” Ianto replied.
The Doctor seemed to be thinking a moment. Suddenly he grinned maniacally at Ianto. “No, no, no, you don’t need a suit, you need a tuxedo!” The Doctor reached into the jacket of his pinstriped suit and pulled out a something that looked like a pen with a weird light on the end. “The sonic screwdriver should do the trick - my magic wand if you would. But which setting…”
As The Doctor tapped the end of the sonic screwdriver against his lips, he turned around and that was when Ianto saw the fairy wings. Fairy wings, sticking out of the man’s suit as if it was an everyday occurrence.
“So, what planet are you from?” Ianto asked, taking a step forward.
“You can call me your Godfather from Gallifrey,” The Doctor said as he adjusted the sonic screwdriver. “Setting 937 should do the trick.”
Ianto tensed up as the man waved the little device around him. A tingling could be felt all over his body. Ianto looked down and was amazed to see the most gorgeous tuxedo he had ever seen; black satin waistcoat, crisp white shirt, silk that moved like butter, even polished wingtip shoes that were more comfortable than any trainers he owned.
He twirled around, catching his reflection in the broken mirror on the wall. Ianto could hardly believe it was him. He looked at The Doctor in disbelief.
“One more thing,” The Doctor said as he reached up and undid his tie. Running the sonic screwdriver along the tie, Ianto gaped in astonishment as it turned to spun gold. “A little extra sparkle for that special night.”
The Doctor put the tie on Ianto and stepped back, winking at him. Ianto brushed an invisible piece of dirt from his shoulder and stood there in amazement. The Doctor pointed up the stairs and uttering a hurried “thank you” Ianto rushed out of the house and into the SUV.
Ianto never knew how he had made it to the Ball so quickly, nor the fact that The Doctor had enchanted the SUV with special blue lights so no one would get into his way. Pulling up to Torchwood House, Ianto turned over the keys to a bloke who wore a nametag that said Rhys.
“Nice car,” Rhys said, eyeing the SUV. He then looked at Ianto. “You look familiar. Do you know Gwen? Me and her went to Uni together for a bit. You almost look like that houseboy her family has.”
“I don’t know who you mean,” Ianto said as he ran a hand delicately over his tuxedo jacket. “Leave it close, I don’t know if I’m staying long.
At the gate, Ianto had forgotten he needed the invitation to get in. Shoving his hands into his pocket, he felt a small leather case inside.
“The Doctor must have left something in this suit,” Ianto grumbled.
Pulling out the little leather wallet, he saw some empty paper. All of a sudden he felt propelled back towards the gate and The Ball. All he wanted to do was go inside. Ianto held up the empty paper at the guards and they let him through. Ianto shrugged his shoulders and continued into the Ball.
The King had spared no expense when it came to entertaining Prince Jack. The best musicians, the best food, and all the eligible girls on the island. So many girls, Ianto could barely see the Prince, except he figured the poor man was at the center of the throng of well dressed women who were standing seven thick around a corner of the room.
It was a brilliant night and Ianto was having the best time of his life. He never thought he would have ever been able to see the inside of Torchwood House, much less dance with a pretty girl there. It had all been worth it. Ianto found himself by the buffet, but he was not hungry. He just stood against the wall, watching the scene.
“Heavy party, yeah?” a male voice said next to him.
“Not bad,” Ianto said. “Prince Jack should like it.”
“Not really my cup of tea,” the man said.
Ianto turned his head and needed to grab the wall for support as he found himself face-to-face with Prince Jack of Boeshane. It was then that he could smell the man’s aftershave. The prince was as handsome as everyone had said, if not handsomer. Jack smiled at him, and all Ianto wanted to do was make him smile forever.
“I like the coat,” Ianto said, trying to make his mouth work. He wanted to fall through the floor.
The prince smiled at him and gently touched his grey coat adorned with medals and rank. “My old military coat. It always seems to impress the locals.” Jack looked Ianto up and down. “I like the tux.”
“Do you always smell that good?” Ianto asked. If he could have managed to move his body, Ianto would have smacked himself upside the head.
Jack just smiled the most brilliant smile at him. “51st Century pheremones. You people have no idea.” Jack reached out and took Ianto’s hand. “Want to dance?”
“What will people think?” Ianto stammered out as Jack led him to a corner of the dance floor.
“You humans and your quaint categories,” Jack retorted. He brought Ianto in close to him, loving the feel of the Welshman against him.
“What about the hordes of women waiting for your attention?” Ianto asked, spying the gaggle of dressed up dames across the room.
“Most of them have never actually seen me. My personal guard Andy can continue the charade a bit longer,” Jack said as he spun Ianto around the room.
Ianto spotted Owen looking directly at him and Jack and buried his head against Jack’s chest. He could feel Jack let out a contented sigh. Suddenly Ianto felt very safe, very far away from the life he had been leading. Jack danced with Ianto all night, even after the women had detected the ruse.
It was nearing midnight when Ianto found himself alone with Jack in a little anteroom off the main ballroom. Jack was sitting next to him on the small settee. Ianto could say nothing, yet nothing needed to be said. In the span of one short night he realised he loved Jack, as Jack loved him. Jack leaned in and kissed Ianto, tasting him. A blend of tea, heat, and spice. It was uniquely Ianto.
Jack had just undone Ianto’s golden tie when the clock began to strike midnight. Ianto felt fuzzy for a moment and put his hands in his lap. That was when he felt the change in his trousers. Ianto pulled away and looked at himself. The tuxedo had changed back to his rags. Ianto jumped up and ran from the room.
Running across the ballroom he ploughed into Owen, sending his stepfather flying into Gwen and Tosh, knocking them all over in front of the King. Ianto ran out the main doors and past Rhys, not even bothering to get the SUV. He just ran and ran and ran all the way back home. Not even bothering to turn on the lights, Ianto hurried into his basement bedroom, and fell to the lumpy bed, crying for what he had lost.
Sometime near dawn, after trying to save some face from being knocked into his own daughters, Owen and the girls returned home. Owen figured he knew who the new man in town was that had been dancing with the Prince. He just couldn’t believe Gwen and Tosh had been so smitten they hadn’t seen their stepbrother with their own two eyes. Of course Gwen had started making googley-eyes at that valet Rhys. Owen would not let that happen to one of his daughters. Sneaking into the kitchen, Owen locked the door to the basement and set the alarm.
That morning, a decree had gone out, and the interwebs exploded as it was announced that Prince Jack was searching for the man who had worn the golden tie. Owen added his address to the list the Prince should check hoping that Jack would choose one of his daughters instead.
Later that day, Prince Jack and his personal guard Andy arrived at Owen’s estate. Owen greeted the man with a seductive smile, playing the gracious host. If he could get Jack on his side, his life would be worth it all. Owen smirked at the small crowd that had turned up and stood around the Prince’s black SUV.
Gwen stood in the parlour nearly beaming at having the Prince all to herself. So much so, she stood in front of her shyer sister, letting Tosh try and act coy. Gwen walked right up to the Prince as Andy rolled his eyes.
“Hello Prince Jack,” Gwen purred, lightly touching his arm.
Jack looked around her at Owen. “I’m looking for the guy that wore the golden tie. Not her,” Jack stated.
Gwen looked at him affronted, her mouth open so wide, the gap between her teeth was huge. Owen turned and shoved Gwen up the stairs.
“We’ll go get her brother,” Owen said, talking over Gwen’s protesting. Upstairs, Owen threw a binding shirt at Gwen and some of his clothes.
“What’s this for?”
“Trust your father. He wants a guy, you will be a guy until he gets you back to Cardiff Castle and then it’s too late, he chose you. Put it on!”
Gwen hurried into the man’s clothing while Owen grabbed a pair of scissors and cut off her hair so it was boy short. Gwen wanted to cry, but Owen threatened her with the scissors. Gwen and Owen hurried downstairs. The Prince seemed to question Gwen’s brother, but took him by the hand nonetheless and headed for his vehicle. Out by the car, a man in brown pinstripes who’s brown coat seemed to flutter of it’s own accord, surreptitiously pointed a device at Gwen and the binding shirt became undone, making her boobs pop out.
“Whoa! You’re a girl,” Jack exclaimed, quickly letting go of Gwen’s hand.
One look at Jack and Gwen ran around the house crying her eyes out. Jack and Andy stalked back into the house.
“I thought you said there was a brother?”
“Oh fuck, of course there is,” Owen said, shoving Tosh up the stairs.
“I’m not a boy,” Tosh complained.
“Trust your father,” Owen said. He grabbed a small scanner device from his bedside table, touching a couple of dials. “He wants a guy, you will be a guy until he gets you back to Cardiff Castle and then it’s too late, he chose you. Now hold still!”
Owen used the device to make Tosh’s body turn into a boy. Tosh looked down her trousers and then back at Owen.
“It didn’t work all the way,” she sniffed.
“It will do for now. I just hope you don’t get stuck this way,” Owen said as he lead her back downstairs.
Jack and Andy stared at Tosh’s brother and only shook their heads. Jack took the “boy” by the hand and walked outside. As they passed by the same pinstriped stranger, the man from Gallifrey pointed his magical device at Tosh, making her trousers fall around her ankles, revealing the fact that she was indeed not a boy. Tosh quickly grabbed up her clothing and ran after her sister. Jack and Andy exchanged a look and stormed back into the house demanding to know if there was indeed a brother around.
The Doctor, meanwhile found himself in the kitchen, looking at the locked basement door. He could hear Ianto trying to get out from the other side. The young man had heard the ruckus when Jack’s SUV pulled up and had tried to find his way to the Prince only to have been stopped by Owen. The Doctor smiled and pointed his sonic screwdriver at the door, unlocking it.
As Ianto opened the door to the basement, the alarm went off, making Owen jump. He excused himself from the Prince so he could see what was going on. While Owen did whatever grown men did in the privacy of their own kitchens, Jack found himself staring out the window at a man in brown pinstripes. The man gave Jack a little wave and Jack smiled. He sent Andy out to fetch The Doctor in. When Andy returned, he was alone. He gave Andy a questioning look.
“He had to go. All he said was ‘his name is Ianto Jones,’” Andy replied with a shrug.
Ianto pushed his way past Owen, threatening to shoot his stepfather in the shoulder again. As he entered the parlour his and Jack’s eyes met. Jack’s blue eyes seemed to sparkle as he stepped towards Ianto.
“You cannot mean him,” Owen griped, rubbing his left shoulder.
“Jones? Ianto Jones?” Jack asked.
“Yes,” Ianto replied.
“I think this belongs to you,” Jack said, pulling the tie of spun gold from his pocket. He put it around Ianto’s neck and yanked the younger man close to him. “As does this,” Jack said, his lips caressing Ianto’s.
Andy gave a little cough as outside what could only be classified as the sound of a pterandon pecking the eyes out of Gwen and Tosh was heard. Jack wrapped an arm around Ianto’s waist and led him out of the horrors of his youth and away from his evil stepfather Owen. As Andy drove the SUV, Jack slid into the backseat with Ianto.
“Forever?” Jack asked, a hand on Ianto’s neck as he kissed the young man again.
“Yes,” Ianto replied.
Series: Torchwood/Doctor Who - kind of
Characters: Ianto, Owen, Gwen, Tosh, Jack, The Doctor, Rhys, Andy
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: A little bit of everything
Beta: luvinthe88and20
Disclaimer: I do not own Torchwood, Doctor Who,or the characters therein, they belong to the BBC and RTD. Any original characters and places are my property.
Summary: Will the poor little teaboy be allowed to go to The Ball?
Author's Note: This was written for National Tell A Fairy Tale Day (February 26th). I did this last year as well. ( Doctor Who story can be found here.) This year, thanks to the plotbunny that paxieamor threw at me, I have modified the Cinderella story to fit amongst Torchwood. There was even visual aids. Enjoy!
Teaboy
(With apologies to the Brothers Grimm)
The husband of a very rich woman fell sick, and as he felt his end drawing near, he called his only son to his bedside. He placed a hand on the young boy’s head, smiling weakly at little Ianto.
“Dear child, be good, be good and pious, and then the good God will always protect thee.” It was then that the young boy’s father closed his eyes and departed.
Little Ianto Jones was dressed in a small suit and sat watch by his father’s grave, Only when everyone had left did he cry for his father. He would wait by the grave, keeping watch as winter came to Cardiff. Soon spring had sprung once more and his mother had married another.
Owen Harper was the Duke of Splott, and brought to the household two daughters. Gwen and Tosh were both vile and black of heart, and the three of them began to make life horrible for little Ianto.
“Should the little idiot even sit by us?” said they.
“If he wants to even stay in this house, he must earn his keep,” Owen sneered.
They took away his nice clothes, his ties and waistcoats, giving them to a beggar-boy on the street. Gwen disappeared and brought back a soiled jumper from a rubbish heap in Splott, while Tosh whipped at him a ratty pair of trousers her friend Tommy had left behind.
“Just look at how proud the little prince is now,” Owen crowed, as he dragged Ianto into the kitchen.
There he had to do all kinds of hard work. Ianto was often the first one up in the morning and the last one to go to bed at night. He had to make breakfast, lunch and dinner, divine exquisite teas for guests, light the fireplace, draws baths for his sisters, lug home electronic equipment for Tosh, and keep Gwen out of trouble with the police. As if that wasn’t bad enough, they never let him drink his own coffee, spilling the beans across the floor, leaving him with tea. Poor teaboy.
In the evening, when Ianto was weary and exhausted - when Gwen was done mocking him and Tosh had finished experimenting on him, when Owen was satisfied that Ianto had done all the filing and paperwork - then he was allowed to make his way down the steps, under the ground. There he could sleep amongst the mechanics of the water pump for the small fountain in front of the house.
One day, his mother was going away on a trip to talk at a University, for she was quite smart but was never home enough to see the life her son now led. She gathered the children before her and asked them each what they wanted.
“I want the best clothes, made of silk, and tons of jewelry to make the boys go mental,” Gwen cried with glee.
“I want the latest computation program from the top scientist in the world on a gold disc,” Tosh stated.
“Whatever you see along the road that looks interesting will be fine Mum,” Ianto said quietly.
So the mother left on her lecture trip, leaving Ianto to take care of the house, the estate, and to see that all the needs of Owen, Gwen and Tosh were met. Mother eventually returned, bringing tons of clothes, but only a carat worth of diamonds for pouty Gwen. Tosh received the second best computation program and stalked off to her room to sulk. Owen was upset that his wife had returned at all and his other interests could no longer stay in his bed.
For Ianto, she handed a small thing that looked almost like a pebble. It was made from an unusual metal. She said she had found it amongst some scrabble on Mermaid Quay. Ianto thanked her and hurried off to his subterranean hideaway. It was there that he found that whatever he wished for he would get. The taste of the best espresso on the planet that was his alone was enough to make him smile in utter happiness.
It happened that one day, the King, who had no daughters of his own to give, was hosting a black tie ball in honor of Prince Jack of Boeshane as he searched for a bride. The Duke of Splott swelled with pride when the household received its invitation. Owen was determined to have one of his daughters win the hand, and all the other bits, of Prince Jack.
Ianto was made to work non-stop. Since Gwen had gained some weight, he had to go from shop to shop to find her a new ball gown. He had to tailor Tosh’s slinky blue number so she showed off enough leg for Prince Jack. Owen made Ianto measure his inseam three times and fix his trousers while he still wore them. He had to do the girl’s hair, and make them all properly caffeinated so they would last until the wee hours of the morning.
“Do I get to go?” Ianto asked Owen expectantly. He doubted he would find any love at the Ball, but it would be nice to not have to clean up anyone else’s trash for once. “The invitation said everyone in the family was invited.”
“How do you know that?” Owen bellowed.
“I know everything,” Ianto stated. “And it said so on the bottom of the invite.”
“Fuck no,” Owen said, poking Ianto in the chest. “Look at what a fucking mess you are.”
Owen turned around, about to set the house alarm so Ianto couldn’t even leave his underground lair that night. Ianto took his chance, aiming the gun he had hidden in his back waistband at Owen. Owen turned and sneered at him.
“Put that away little boy,” Owen said. “You wouldn’t dare.”
Before another second could pass, Ianto pulled the trigger, hitting Owen in the left shoulder. Owen clutched at his shoulder, sagging against the computer station Tosh had set-up.
“Shit!”
“Can I go to the Ball now?” Ianto asked.
“There is a mass of glowing inchworms that are creeping along the walkways at the Plass. I cannot attend, and thusly none of my family can go, unless they are all picked up.” Owen smirked at him. “Duties of the Duke and all that. I can’t see that it is done with my arm like this,”
Ianto sighed and took the family’s SUV to the Plass. Taking a box and a pair of tongs from the boot, he chased down every alien inchworm that he could find around the Millennium Centre. Hurrying back to the house, he noticed all was quiet. Picking up a note from Owen, he read that they had left without him, so that Ianto wouldn’t try killing him again.
“I was aiming for your shoulder,” Ianto mumbled as he dejectedly tromped downstairs to his meager means in the basement.
Leaning up against the cold wall, Ianto dug out the magical stone his mother had brought him. He slumped down to the floor, feeling the unearthly warmth from the stone. All he had wanted to do was get away from work for one night. Maybe meet a nice girl. No one had been nice to him since he had left school. Even his best friend Lisa had stopped emailing and texting him. As far as he knew she was dead. Ianto wished with all his heart that he could have gone to the ball for Prince Jack as he fell asleep on the cold concrete.
“Well… Well… Well… How do you do?” a voice said from above him.
Ianto opened his eyes and was startled to see a man standing there in a brown pinstriped suit. The man smiled at Ianto and stuffed his hands into his trouser pockets. The stranger crouched down next to Ianto as he pulled out a pair of spectacles. He peered through them at Ianto.
“You’re a right mess, aren’t you?” the stranger said.
“Who are you?” Ianto asked as he pushed himself up the wall.
“Oh, I haven’t introduced myself yet, have I?” the stranger asked as he stood up as well. “Right then, you can just call me The Doctor. Let's see now, you wanted to go to the ball the King is hosting for Prince Jack of Boeshane- Boeshane, Boe, Boe, I once knew a man, well I guess you could say man hew was rather more like just a big head, he was called the Face of Boe, but that’s neither here or there,” The Doctor said. “What we need to do is get you ready for this Ball.”
“Uh, sorry Doctor, but it’s a black-tie affair. I don’t own a suit anymore, just these rags and sweats,” Ianto replied.
The Doctor seemed to be thinking a moment. Suddenly he grinned maniacally at Ianto. “No, no, no, you don’t need a suit, you need a tuxedo!” The Doctor reached into the jacket of his pinstriped suit and pulled out a something that looked like a pen with a weird light on the end. “The sonic screwdriver should do the trick - my magic wand if you would. But which setting…”
As The Doctor tapped the end of the sonic screwdriver against his lips, he turned around and that was when Ianto saw the fairy wings. Fairy wings, sticking out of the man’s suit as if it was an everyday occurrence.
“So, what planet are you from?” Ianto asked, taking a step forward.
“You can call me your Godfather from Gallifrey,” The Doctor said as he adjusted the sonic screwdriver. “Setting 937 should do the trick.”
Ianto tensed up as the man waved the little device around him. A tingling could be felt all over his body. Ianto looked down and was amazed to see the most gorgeous tuxedo he had ever seen; black satin waistcoat, crisp white shirt, silk that moved like butter, even polished wingtip shoes that were more comfortable than any trainers he owned.
He twirled around, catching his reflection in the broken mirror on the wall. Ianto could hardly believe it was him. He looked at The Doctor in disbelief.
“One more thing,” The Doctor said as he reached up and undid his tie. Running the sonic screwdriver along the tie, Ianto gaped in astonishment as it turned to spun gold. “A little extra sparkle for that special night.”
The Doctor put the tie on Ianto and stepped back, winking at him. Ianto brushed an invisible piece of dirt from his shoulder and stood there in amazement. The Doctor pointed up the stairs and uttering a hurried “thank you” Ianto rushed out of the house and into the SUV.
Ianto never knew how he had made it to the Ball so quickly, nor the fact that The Doctor had enchanted the SUV with special blue lights so no one would get into his way. Pulling up to Torchwood House, Ianto turned over the keys to a bloke who wore a nametag that said Rhys.
“Nice car,” Rhys said, eyeing the SUV. He then looked at Ianto. “You look familiar. Do you know Gwen? Me and her went to Uni together for a bit. You almost look like that houseboy her family has.”
“I don’t know who you mean,” Ianto said as he ran a hand delicately over his tuxedo jacket. “Leave it close, I don’t know if I’m staying long.
At the gate, Ianto had forgotten he needed the invitation to get in. Shoving his hands into his pocket, he felt a small leather case inside.
“The Doctor must have left something in this suit,” Ianto grumbled.
Pulling out the little leather wallet, he saw some empty paper. All of a sudden he felt propelled back towards the gate and The Ball. All he wanted to do was go inside. Ianto held up the empty paper at the guards and they let him through. Ianto shrugged his shoulders and continued into the Ball.
The King had spared no expense when it came to entertaining Prince Jack. The best musicians, the best food, and all the eligible girls on the island. So many girls, Ianto could barely see the Prince, except he figured the poor man was at the center of the throng of well dressed women who were standing seven thick around a corner of the room.
It was a brilliant night and Ianto was having the best time of his life. He never thought he would have ever been able to see the inside of Torchwood House, much less dance with a pretty girl there. It had all been worth it. Ianto found himself by the buffet, but he was not hungry. He just stood against the wall, watching the scene.
“Heavy party, yeah?” a male voice said next to him.
“Not bad,” Ianto said. “Prince Jack should like it.”
“Not really my cup of tea,” the man said.
Ianto turned his head and needed to grab the wall for support as he found himself face-to-face with Prince Jack of Boeshane. It was then that he could smell the man’s aftershave. The prince was as handsome as everyone had said, if not handsomer. Jack smiled at him, and all Ianto wanted to do was make him smile forever.
“I like the coat,” Ianto said, trying to make his mouth work. He wanted to fall through the floor.
The prince smiled at him and gently touched his grey coat adorned with medals and rank. “My old military coat. It always seems to impress the locals.” Jack looked Ianto up and down. “I like the tux.”
“Do you always smell that good?” Ianto asked. If he could have managed to move his body, Ianto would have smacked himself upside the head.
Jack just smiled the most brilliant smile at him. “51st Century pheremones. You people have no idea.” Jack reached out and took Ianto’s hand. “Want to dance?”
“What will people think?” Ianto stammered out as Jack led him to a corner of the dance floor.
“You humans and your quaint categories,” Jack retorted. He brought Ianto in close to him, loving the feel of the Welshman against him.
“What about the hordes of women waiting for your attention?” Ianto asked, spying the gaggle of dressed up dames across the room.
“Most of them have never actually seen me. My personal guard Andy can continue the charade a bit longer,” Jack said as he spun Ianto around the room.
Ianto spotted Owen looking directly at him and Jack and buried his head against Jack’s chest. He could feel Jack let out a contented sigh. Suddenly Ianto felt very safe, very far away from the life he had been leading. Jack danced with Ianto all night, even after the women had detected the ruse.
It was nearing midnight when Ianto found himself alone with Jack in a little anteroom off the main ballroom. Jack was sitting next to him on the small settee. Ianto could say nothing, yet nothing needed to be said. In the span of one short night he realised he loved Jack, as Jack loved him. Jack leaned in and kissed Ianto, tasting him. A blend of tea, heat, and spice. It was uniquely Ianto.
Jack had just undone Ianto’s golden tie when the clock began to strike midnight. Ianto felt fuzzy for a moment and put his hands in his lap. That was when he felt the change in his trousers. Ianto pulled away and looked at himself. The tuxedo had changed back to his rags. Ianto jumped up and ran from the room.
Running across the ballroom he ploughed into Owen, sending his stepfather flying into Gwen and Tosh, knocking them all over in front of the King. Ianto ran out the main doors and past Rhys, not even bothering to get the SUV. He just ran and ran and ran all the way back home. Not even bothering to turn on the lights, Ianto hurried into his basement bedroom, and fell to the lumpy bed, crying for what he had lost.
Sometime near dawn, after trying to save some face from being knocked into his own daughters, Owen and the girls returned home. Owen figured he knew who the new man in town was that had been dancing with the Prince. He just couldn’t believe Gwen and Tosh had been so smitten they hadn’t seen their stepbrother with their own two eyes. Of course Gwen had started making googley-eyes at that valet Rhys. Owen would not let that happen to one of his daughters. Sneaking into the kitchen, Owen locked the door to the basement and set the alarm.
That morning, a decree had gone out, and the interwebs exploded as it was announced that Prince Jack was searching for the man who had worn the golden tie. Owen added his address to the list the Prince should check hoping that Jack would choose one of his daughters instead.
Later that day, Prince Jack and his personal guard Andy arrived at Owen’s estate. Owen greeted the man with a seductive smile, playing the gracious host. If he could get Jack on his side, his life would be worth it all. Owen smirked at the small crowd that had turned up and stood around the Prince’s black SUV.
Gwen stood in the parlour nearly beaming at having the Prince all to herself. So much so, she stood in front of her shyer sister, letting Tosh try and act coy. Gwen walked right up to the Prince as Andy rolled his eyes.
“Hello Prince Jack,” Gwen purred, lightly touching his arm.
Jack looked around her at Owen. “I’m looking for the guy that wore the golden tie. Not her,” Jack stated.
Gwen looked at him affronted, her mouth open so wide, the gap between her teeth was huge. Owen turned and shoved Gwen up the stairs.
“We’ll go get her brother,” Owen said, talking over Gwen’s protesting. Upstairs, Owen threw a binding shirt at Gwen and some of his clothes.
“What’s this for?”
“Trust your father. He wants a guy, you will be a guy until he gets you back to Cardiff Castle and then it’s too late, he chose you. Put it on!”
Gwen hurried into the man’s clothing while Owen grabbed a pair of scissors and cut off her hair so it was boy short. Gwen wanted to cry, but Owen threatened her with the scissors. Gwen and Owen hurried downstairs. The Prince seemed to question Gwen’s brother, but took him by the hand nonetheless and headed for his vehicle. Out by the car, a man in brown pinstripes who’s brown coat seemed to flutter of it’s own accord, surreptitiously pointed a device at Gwen and the binding shirt became undone, making her boobs pop out.
“Whoa! You’re a girl,” Jack exclaimed, quickly letting go of Gwen’s hand.
One look at Jack and Gwen ran around the house crying her eyes out. Jack and Andy stalked back into the house.
“I thought you said there was a brother?”
“Oh fuck, of course there is,” Owen said, shoving Tosh up the stairs.
“I’m not a boy,” Tosh complained.
“Trust your father,” Owen said. He grabbed a small scanner device from his bedside table, touching a couple of dials. “He wants a guy, you will be a guy until he gets you back to Cardiff Castle and then it’s too late, he chose you. Now hold still!”
Owen used the device to make Tosh’s body turn into a boy. Tosh looked down her trousers and then back at Owen.
“It didn’t work all the way,” she sniffed.
“It will do for now. I just hope you don’t get stuck this way,” Owen said as he lead her back downstairs.
Jack and Andy stared at Tosh’s brother and only shook their heads. Jack took the “boy” by the hand and walked outside. As they passed by the same pinstriped stranger, the man from Gallifrey pointed his magical device at Tosh, making her trousers fall around her ankles, revealing the fact that she was indeed not a boy. Tosh quickly grabbed up her clothing and ran after her sister. Jack and Andy exchanged a look and stormed back into the house demanding to know if there was indeed a brother around.
The Doctor, meanwhile found himself in the kitchen, looking at the locked basement door. He could hear Ianto trying to get out from the other side. The young man had heard the ruckus when Jack’s SUV pulled up and had tried to find his way to the Prince only to have been stopped by Owen. The Doctor smiled and pointed his sonic screwdriver at the door, unlocking it.
As Ianto opened the door to the basement, the alarm went off, making Owen jump. He excused himself from the Prince so he could see what was going on. While Owen did whatever grown men did in the privacy of their own kitchens, Jack found himself staring out the window at a man in brown pinstripes. The man gave Jack a little wave and Jack smiled. He sent Andy out to fetch The Doctor in. When Andy returned, he was alone. He gave Andy a questioning look.
“He had to go. All he said was ‘his name is Ianto Jones,’” Andy replied with a shrug.
Ianto pushed his way past Owen, threatening to shoot his stepfather in the shoulder again. As he entered the parlour his and Jack’s eyes met. Jack’s blue eyes seemed to sparkle as he stepped towards Ianto.
“You cannot mean him,” Owen griped, rubbing his left shoulder.
“Jones? Ianto Jones?” Jack asked.
“Yes,” Ianto replied.
“I think this belongs to you,” Jack said, pulling the tie of spun gold from his pocket. He put it around Ianto’s neck and yanked the younger man close to him. “As does this,” Jack said, his lips caressing Ianto’s.
Andy gave a little cough as outside what could only be classified as the sound of a pterandon pecking the eyes out of Gwen and Tosh was heard. Jack wrapped an arm around Ianto’s waist and led him out of the horrors of his youth and away from his evil stepfather Owen. As Andy drove the SUV, Jack slid into the backseat with Ianto.
“Forever?” Jack asked, a hand on Ianto’s neck as he kissed the young man again.
“Yes,” Ianto replied.