You Let Me Stand (Part Three)
Title: You Let Me Stand
Author: hunters_retreat
Artist: liliaeth
Genre: RPS
Pairing: Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki
Rating: NC-17
Wordcount: 30K+
Warnings: Physical and emotional abuse, neglect, mentions of past attempted rape, dub-con due to a beta’s heat cycle.
Summary: Three years ago Jensen Ackles had been a feral beta, caged and dangerous to anyone around him. Three years ago the council sent Jared Padalecki and his team into the Two Forks pack to find out the truth about the claims of beta abuse and neglect. What Jared found was a vicious fight to take the pack away from the Alpha and mated to the feral Pack Beta.
Jensen was sent away to heal but Jared stayed behind to clean out the pack and see if it was worth saving. After three years though, Jensen is ready to go home and confront his past. Jared is hesitant but after their reunion at a Beta Right’s conference, he agrees. It isn’t a smooth journey though and not everyone is happy to have Jared as the Alpha of the Two Forks Pack. When outside forces try to tear their fragile pack apart, will they be strong enough to stand together? Or will Jared and Jensen fall apart, and take the Two Forks Pack with them?
“Alpha Padalecki! Alpha! Over here!”
It was a mad house. The end of the conference had come and while Jensen had been happy enough within the walls of the hotel, security had been called in because of the reporters and paparazzi that waited outside the front door.
Jensen had faced this every time he entered and left a conference since he’d started to work with the Beta Rights movement but it never failed to surprise him at the veracity people had when it came to pressing him about his personal life.
Yes, he made himself a public target by speaking but while most people gave him the space and respect he needed to talk about his past, too many people outside of the movement just wanted a sound bite.
“This is a bad idea,” Jared said softly at his side.
Jensen held his head up high as he looked at Jared. “I’ve been doing this with Chris the whole time, Jared. You know that. We can get through. It’s just a short distance to the car. Ignore the reporters and cameras and we’ll be on our way home.”
He saw the way Jared’s eyes flashed, something angry behind them, and he knew that bringing up home was the wrong thing to do. He didn’t know what exactly Jared expected to happen when Jensen returned, but there was so much anger in the alpha. Over the years, Jared had opened up about his father’s experiences as an abused beta but Jensen had never seen the anger in his eyes. What Jensen could remember of Jared’s reaction to his abuse in the beginning, it had always been compassion and sadness that had stuck out the most.
Chris has always said Jared had a hard streak in him. When Jensen was healthy enough to realize just what Jared had to do, he’d asked because he’d needed to be certain that Jared had been strong enough. Cleaning out the pack the way he had wasn’t easy and even an established alpha would have a hard time. Jared had been part of the Beta Rights movement most of his life though and he’d moved from pack to pack at order of the Council. As the Alpha of the Two Forks Pack, he had to establish himself and that would have been a hard fought battle, even after Jensen’s father had been defeated and exiled.
“You two ready to face the crazies?” Chris came up beside Jared, his voice calm as he approached the agitated alpha.
Jared turned his eyes to Chris and let out a deep breath. “Chris…”
There was something in his voice and Jensen gripped Jared’s arm to try to get his attention. Jared didn’t look at him though and it wasn’t until Chris nodded that Jared seemed to relax.
“I got him. Don’t worry Alpha,” Chris said as he bowed his head. “I would never let anything happen to your Beta.” Chris took a step closer then and Jensen watched as he tilted his head in submission to Jared. He was shocked by the display, but Chris was an alpha coming into Jared’s pack. It made sense that he would have to bow to the Pack Alpha.
Jared took a step away from Jensen and turned to face him again. “You’re going to walk out with Chris. I’ll be right in front of you.”
“Why can’t I walk with you?” Jensen asked.
“It’s too much. I told you, I wasn’t ready. I trust you to know what you can handle Jensen. I need you to follow my lead when I say what I can’t.”
Jensen took a deep breath before he nodded. “Of course.”
Jared closed the distance between them then and wrapped him tightly in his arms. “It’ll be okay. I just need to get you to the car safe. I’m too on edge right now.”
When Jared pulled away he bent and pressed a quick kiss to Jensen’s lips. Jensen tangled his fingers in Jared’s hair and when the alpha tried to pull away he kept him close. “We’ll be okay. We’ll get to the car and be done with this. I’m your beta. I know you can do this Jared.”
Jared let out a shuddered breath and nodded his head before Jensen let him pull away.
“Let’s get this done with.”
Jared strode off toward the doors and Jensen followed quickly behind with Chris at his side.
There was security manning the walkway between the hotel and cars that waited for them but the noise was almost deafening. Jared walked with his back tall and he didn’t falter as he ignored the questions that were directed at them. Not even the inappropriately personal questions seemed to get past his cool façade.
Jensen was grateful to have Chris by his side, but he was more worried about Jared.
A commotion broke out behind Jensen and a reporter stuck a microphone close to his face. “Jensen, what can you tell us about the mating claim and the lawsuit that followed? Will there be a second claim-“
His words were cut off as Jared’s hulking figure came up from behind Jensen. He pushed past his beta and forced the report back against the wall of the hotel, one hand on his throat.
“Jared!”
Chris pulled him away but Jensen just wanted to get to Jared to let him know he was fine. “He won’t back off until you’re safe Jensen. Get in the damn car!”
Chris didn’t pull the alpha card on him, but he let his strength be felt as he manhandled Jensen towards the car. His brain caught up with him and he realized his friend was right. Jared had warned him and the only thing he could do was take himself out of the equation. He got to the car and let Chris close the door. A second later it opened again and Jared was in the driver seat beside him and they pulled quickly away.
Chris would follow in the second car but Jensen could see the fury that still gripped Jared. He didn’t know what to say, didn’t know how to cross the silence. He’d seen Jared like that before, when he’d first come to the pack, but Jensen’s memories of it were overcast with the torment of his reality back then.
Silence filled the car and the only sound came from Jared’s hands as he re-gripped the steering wheel, his knuckles white. Jensen let out a deep breath to try to dispel some of his own tension but it was hard when he could feel the anger coming off of his Alpha. The Jared he’d come to know since he’d moved away was generally well tempered and funny. He was laid back about things and he helped Jensen laugh about things that had sometimes tormented him. It was easy to forget, years and miles away, that Jared had a fury that rivaled any Jensen had seen before.
“I won’t apologize for who I am,” Jared broke the silence. “I protect my pack and I will protect you with my last breath. I’m sorry if I scared you or upset you, but I can’t be less than I am.”
Jensen swallowed against the lump in his throat. “I don’t expect you to be. I just forgot. You make it sound easy when we talk. Even when you talk about how frustrated you are or how angry something has made you, I see it after the fact. After you’ve calmed down. I haven’t seen you truly angry since-“
“Since the mating claim.”
Jensen nodded. There was nothing else to say to that.
“I would never hurt you, Jensen.”
Jensen watched Jared’s profile while he drove them away from the incident. “I’m not afraid of you, Jared,” he said as he reached over and took one of Jared’s hands from the wheel. He twined his fingers through Jared’s and settled their hands on his knee. “I feel safe with you. That’s a good thing. No matter how angry you were, I knew I was safe with you. It’s taken a long time for me to feel safe with any alpha, let alone my Alpha when he’s angry.”
“So, take the win?”
Jensen smiled. “Exactly. I’ve had a lot of set backs and I’ve learned where to see the little victories. Getting out of that hotel and sitting in the car with you, heading home to my pack? That’s not a little victory. It’s a major one.”
“Just hope the Beta Rights movement thinks so when that reporter shows what I did.”
“Did you hurt him?”
“No, I just held him until Chris told me you were in the car.”
“Then it was less than he deserved for breaking the security line and coming at me like that. That was amazing control, Alpha.”
Jared looked at him quickly before he turned his eyes back to the road, but Jensen could see the small smile there. It wasn’t enough, but it was a start. Small victories, right?
The hotel room was nice and clean when Jensen took a seat on the bed. It wasn’t home but they were on the way. One more day and they’d be with his pack and Jensen would see what he had to face then. Until, he had the evening with his Alpha and he wasn’t sure what to do with that.
Jared had made sure that Jensen knew he wouldn’t have an intimate relationship with him until they got home, but there was something else Jensen needed and he didn’t know how to ask Jared for it.
“Hey, you hungry?” Jared asked.
Jensen smiled as he grabbed the room service menu and lay down across the bed with it. Jared joined him a moment later and they quickly had dinner ordered. When Jared dropped back onto the bed, Jensen curled in around him and let his head rest on Jared’s shoulder.
“Tired?” Jared asked.
“Just from being cooped up.”
“Feels good to just stretch out,” Jared said.
Jensen nuzzled up against Jared’s neck and he felt the alpha pull him closer. Jared’s nose pressed against the mark at the spot where his shoulder and neck met. The scar was still visible there and Jensen wasn’t subtle as he turned his head to give Jared better access to it.
“Jensen?” his voice sounded wrecked and Jensen knew Jared had to want the same thing that Jensen did.
“Just think about it until after dinner, okay?” Jensen asked softly. “I fought anyone who tried to put a claim on me. You’re the only one who managed. I know you’re not ready for the rest of it and I’m not trying to push. But you are my mate and the claim is faded. I want to feel it again. I want everyone to be able to feel it, fresh and new when I walk back into my pack.”
“Jensen,” Jared whispered his name against his skin. His lips brushed over the claim and Jensen closed his eyes at the feel of his alpha touching in that particular way, in that particular place. “I’ll think about it.”
He didn’t bite down and renew the claim, but he teased his lips over the spot, light brushes and soft kisses until Jensen thought he might need to remove himself from the bed to take care of himself in private.
He was saved from the moment when there was a knock at the door and their dinner arrived.
The air was tense between them as they ate but it wasn’t bad. Jensen watched Jared too closely and Jared tried too hard not to watch Jensen. They were half way through the meal before Jensen finally caught Jared’s eye and he couldn’t help the soft chuckle that escaped his lips.
It made the alpha smile and then they both started to laugh. It broke the tension that had grown between them but Jared’s eyes were still hungry as he watched Jensen.
“Eat your dinner,” Jensen said with a shake of his head. He still had a smile on his face though.
“You’re amazing,” Jared said softly as he picked up his fork and began to dig into the baked potato on his plate.
Jensen just rolled his eyes. “Don’t need to sweet talk me Alpha. I’m already yours.”
Jared let out an undignified snort at that. “Mine? We’ll see about that after dinner.”
Jensen stopped with his fork in mid-air and Jared smiled. “Yeah, I thought about it. Maybe, if I’d put a more recent claim on you I’d have been able to hold myself together better at the hotel this morning. Maybe it will help me keep my temper when we get home. And if the old claim has me so unsettled right now, I can’t imagine how it makes you feel right now.”
“Thank you, Jared,” Jensen said as he reached across the table and took one of the alpha’s hands in his own.
Jared smiled at him and though there was heat behind his eyes, it was mostly affection that shone through. “Chris was right when he told me I was screwed. I can’t deny you anything.”
When Jared pulled his hand away, they finished eating in silence but it was anticipation that flavored the rest of the meal.
When they had finished eating and Jared had left the tray outside their room, Jensen could feel the alpha tense up. He knew he needed to do something to reassure him but he wasn’t sure what.
“Movie?” he asked as he threw the remote at Jared. The alpha caught it and Jensen watched as he turned the TV on and began to look through the channels. Jensen slipped into the bathroom then and completed his nightly ablutions. When he was done, he slipped into the light sleep pants he usually wore and headed into the main room.
Jared was leaning back against the head board as he watched a cooking show.
“Cooking?”
Jared smiled at him. “I wanted to wait for you to start a movie. Mind if I get cleaned up first?”
“Go ahead,” Jensen said as he packed his things away in his overnight case. He let out a deep breath as the door closed between them. When he got to the bed he pulled the covers back and crawled in. He let Jared sleep on the side closest to the door since he knew the alpha was overly concerned about his safety right now. It wasn’t much, but Jensen would do what he could to help Jared feel more settled.
He obviously expected tomorrow to be rough and Jensen didn’t want to add to his stress when he could help it. He didn’t know if he’d even be able to think about that sort of thing come morning.
The cooking show helped take his mind off it all, if only because it was about children and it was funny to watch them try to come up with interesting ways to cook with the different challenges on the show. He didn’t even notice Jared had left the bathroom until he felt the bed dip down beside him.
“Ready to start the movie?” Jensen asked.
It was an action movie they’d both seen. They’d skyped the whole thing together last month in what Jared referred to as their movie dates. Jensen settled against Jared’s chest and smiled at the thought of actually being able to go see a movie with his alpha. Sharing popcorn, soda, stealing his candy. He couldn’t wait to do those things with Jared.
“You seem pleased,” Jared said softly as the movie started.
“Just thinking about taking you to the movies. Or a ball game maybe. Even just out to grab drinks at a bar. We’ve been separated for so long, the idea of going on a real date with you still seems a little surreal.”
Jared gave a soft hum of agreement as he pulled Jensen closer to him. When he began to nuzzle up against Jensen’s ear he realized the alpha had no intention of making Jensen wait to reclaim his mark.
He turned his head to give Jared the room he needed. “Do it,” he whispered. “Claim me again, Alpha.”
“I claim you as my Beta, but soon, I’ll claim you as mine again.” Jared teased his lips across the mark and Jensen squirmed against him. The anticipation made him edgy and he felt Jared’s chuckle through his chest.
Jared sat up and pushed Jensen onto his back before he leaned over and pressed his body over Jensen. Jensen couldn’t help the way his body relaxed under his Alpha. When Jared licked across the old scar Jensen arched up into him.
“Jesus, Jensen,” Jared breathed into his skin.
“Please,” he begged. Jared wasn’t being cruel but Jensen wanted so much more than Jared had offered so far. He knew Jared wanted more, wanted the same things he did, but the alpha forced them to take this slow. To be certain this mating wasn’t as harmful to them both as the last one had been.
“I’ve got you, Jensen,” Jared said as he let his weight settle more firmly onto Jensen’s body. Jensen curled his hands in Jared’s long hair and shivered as Jared’s beard tickled at his sensitive neck. Jared began to lick at the mark again. When he began to suck at it, Jensen’s hips thrust up against Jared. Jared let out a soft hum of approval and Jensen didn’t try to control his reaction to what his alpha was doing to him.
He was nearly whimpering with need before Jared took pity on him. Jared licked across what Jensen was sure would be a spectacular bruise before he finally bit down hard. He felt Jared’s teeth elongate the way only an alpha could, felt the burn of the claim in his blood, and he came against Jared’s hip with a loud cry.
“Jensen, I need…”
“Yes,” Jensen answered before he could ask for what he needed. Jensen didn’t care. Whatever it was, it was yes.
Jared pulled away from him but it was only to push his boxers down his thighs. His cock was hard and leaking as Jared began to stroke himself. He leaned back over Jensen and bit hard at the mark again. When he did, Jensen felt Jared’s come across his naked stomach and chest. Jared’s moans were masked in his neck but Jensen wrapped his arms around Jared’s neck and held him close as he bit his claim into his skin and marked his body with his seed.
He found Jensen’s lips when he’d found his release but his body continued to move as Jared dragged his cock through the come and marked Jensen further with his scent.
When he finally stilled, he took a deep breath and pushed back to stare at Jensen. He closed his eyes and licked his lips. “I shouldn’t have.”
Jensen looked up at the man in front of him. Jared was beautiful. He was tall and strong and proud of his heritage. He was kind and sensitive to the needs of others. He was exposed, physically and emotionally in that moment. It was in Jensen’s hands to hurt him or heal him.
He sat up and pulled Jared’s pants back up and pushed the alpha onto his back. He pulled the blankets up around his waist and settled against his side with his head pillowed on his shoulder where Jared would be able to easily reach the new mark.
When he felt Jared relax under him, he pressed a kiss into Jared’s neck. “I’m glad you did.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“In the morning. They know you’re coming home. I let the others know that you and Jim were both coming home tomorrow.”
“You think they’re ready?”
“I think the only way to find out is once you get there.”
“That’s why you’re so worked up about all this, isn’t it?”
“I’ve spent the last three years trying to make this a safe place for you, Jensen. But I have no idea if it worked or not. There are a few people I still have suspicions about but no one will talk up about them and I haven’t caught them at anything. Maybe they weren’t part of what happened to you, but they might be a part of the rest of it. I can’t just exile people from the pack without cause though.”
“I know, Jared.”
“I’m suspicious of the whole pack. I can’t help it. What they’d become? I can’t forget that they all knew what was being done to you and they did nothing.”
“I don’t know that I can either. We’ll see what happens tomorrow when we get there, alright?” He sat up on his elbow and looked at the alpha. “Tomorrow, we’ll go in there and we’ll take care of each other, right?”
Jared smiled at him, then set his hand on Jensen’s neck and ran his thumb over the mark. “That’s right. I’ll take care of you, Beta.”
“I’ll take care of you, Alpha.”
He leaned down and kissed Jared, something soft and reassuring before he finally let himself rest his head back on the alpha’s shoulder. It wasn’t long before sleep overtook him.
They both had nightmares, but they shushed each other through their waking and kissed each other back to sleep.
Jensen rolled his shoulders to try to alleviate some of the tension but he knew it wouldn’t do any good. They’d just passed the welcome sign for the Two Forks Valley and Jensen had to take deep steadying breaths to keep a straight face. Jared was just as tense as he was. Jared had lived here for the past three years though.
“You’re sure this is okay?” Jared asked again.
Jensen let out a shaky breath. It was after lunch and he was glad they’d stopped early. He wasn’t sure he’d have kept anything down if he’d waited to eat here. “Yes. I told you before. I never lived in the Alpha Residence and my father sure as hell never took me in. Even the cage he held me in was at my mother’s house so no one would see his disgrace. You’ve lived in the Alpha’s Residence. It will smell like you. The last place I want to be today is someplace that doesn’t make me think of you.”
“Alright. I just wanted to be certain. Katie has been staying in your old home and if you would prefer to be there-”
“No. I know I can’t stay there. I don’t need the constant reminder of what happened in those walls.”
Jensen could feel him tense, but Jared didn’t ask again.
The rest of the drive was silent. Thankfully, the Alpha Residence was at the edge of town. The idea was that the Alpha would be the first to get visitors. They would have to come to him before they were allowed to visit the town and the pack. It was an outdated concept, but Jared had reinstituted it while he sorted the pack out. He didn’t want the wrong sort of people coming into the pack when he was in the process of cleaning up the mess of the last Alpha. He was more lax with visitors now, but Jensen knew no one would be allowed to join them until Jensen was comfortable enough to deal with the people in his pack.
When they pulled up to the house, Jensen gasped. He remembered the old place, with its paint peeling gray and the windows shuttered and closed up. Trees had hidden the home from sight and wild bushes had grown across the front porch.
The driveway was now lined with freshly trimmed trees that made the drive seem majestic. The house had been painted a light shade of sage green, welcoming and warm. The bushes had been cut back and brightly colored flowers were planted around the wrap around porch. The windows were wide open and he could make out curtains blowing with the summer breeze.
“Jensen?”
Jared had stopped the car and Jensen got out without answering. He stared at the Alpha’s residence and he let out a shuddered breath.
“Jensen?” Jared was at his side and Jensen turned and dropped his face into his Alpha’s neck. He took a few deep breaths and Jared seemed to understand. He wrapped his arms around Jensen and buried his nose into the mark on Jensen’s skin.
It calmed him until he was ready to face the rest of the house. “I’m ok,” he said softly.
“I know it looks a lot different.”
“It’s good, Jared. It looked decrepit and old before. This looks like a home.”
Jared nodded, then offered Jensen his hand. “Are you ready?”
“Yeah.” Jensen let Jared twine their fingers together as he walked them towards the front door. It wasn’t locked and Jensen stepped into the house with much different expectations than he’d pulled into the drive.
Instead of a place of his father’s dark history and weighted past, Jared had turned this into a residence. It was someplace you wanted to visit. There were pictured on the wall in the front hallway of Jared and his friends. Jensen had seen enough pictures to recognize some of them. Chris was in a few as well and Jensen smiled at this best friend’s face in the picture frame.
The rooms had been stripped of their wallpaper and painted light, airy colors. The wood paneling was replaced with honey wood and all the furniture had been modernized. Jared had spent a lot of time on this place and he’d never said a word to Jensen about it.
When he looked at Jared he shrugged. “I wanted it to be a surprise.”
“It is. It’s a good surprise,” he said as he looked around the modern kitchen. He closed the distance between them again and took a deep breath of Jared’s scent. It filled the home, but there was something else there as well. When he looked up at Jared, his alpha seemed to understand.
“Katie was here. She stepped up to take charge while I was gone. She would have done business here.”
“Or she came to bring muffins,” a female voice called from the front hallway. “I also brought cookies. I’ve heard chocolate was the way to our Beta’s heart.”
Jensen stayed close to Jared but he didn’t feel threatened by the beta that walked into the kitchen. She smiled warmly at Jensen and he knew her voice even if he didn’t know her face.
“Katie, it’s nice to finally meet you.”
She set the tray of food she’d brought down on the table and smiled at Jensen. Her long blond hair hung in curls past her shoulders and she wore no-nonsense jeans and a tee shirt. She was beautiful but there was something wholesome about her. She gave a little shrug of her shoulders as she took a step closer to Jensen.
“Permission to hug my Beta, sir?” she teased.
Jensen let out a bark of laughter and he stepped right into her embrace. He felt her press her nose to his neck and he scented her the same as she was scenting him. She was the warm summer sun at the lake. Honeysuckle vines grown wild and beautiful.
“It is so good to see you, Jensen,” she said softly.
When he stepped back she looked him over for a few moments before she finally took a step back. “I figured you might want something after the drive. Not too heavy. Matt had the kids help me pick blueberries for the muffins. I made sure the fridge was stocked too. If you need anything, just let me know. I don’t know all of your favorites, but I did my best. I’m sure you’ll want to start doing your own thing soon enough, but if there’s anything you need while you’re getting settled in, I’m your girl.”
She sat at the table and Jensen was drawn down to sit with her. He nibbled on muffins and Katie made lemon chamomile tea to drink. Jared stood back in the kitchen and watched until Katie noticed.
“Beta, may I have permission to hug the crap out of the Alpha now?”
Jensen had already known how good Katie was at her job. The way she phrased her request though made him look twice at her. If she had made a formal request it would have bothered him. It would have felt like she wanted to imply something about her relationship with Jared. The informality of it, while still asking, made their relationship feel more like siblings than anything else. If she’d called Jared her alpha, it would have represented a claim that Jensen wasn’t sure he’d have handled well, but if she’d called him Jensen’s Alpha it might have brought up old memories he didn’t want to face just yet.
He smiled as he reached out and touched her hand lightly in an affectionate gesture. Her eyes lit up when he did and her smile grew. “Hug away.”
Katie moved around the kitchen slowly and Jensen knew it was to keep either of them from having a startle reflex. When she stopped in front of Jared she waited with a grin. He snatched her up off the floor and swung her around with a light laugh. Jensen closed his eyes and enjoyed the sound of their joined laughter as it filled the house.
“Did I miss anything while I was gone?”
“Packs been quiet. Nothing to do but clean up and wait for you boys. We did get to see your magnificence on TV though.”
“The reporter?” Jared cringed.
“Yep,” she said with a smile. “The news is talking about what amazing control you have that you didn’t rip the guy to pieces.”
“That’s what they took away from that?” Jared asked.
Jensen shook his head. “I saw the rage in your eyes, Jared, and it was absolutely amazing that the reporter walked out with just a bruise from where you held him back.”
“At least the Beta Rights movement never labeled you a saint. You were always the wild one, anyway.”
“What?” Jensen asked.
Katie smiled at Jensen as she came back to join him at the table. Jared sat on Jensen’s other side and grabbed a chocolate chip cookie to eat.
“When they needed a cool head to lead a team, they sent Chris. When they thought there might be a real fight, that they needed someone with more ingrained instincts, they send Jared.”
“All the times we’ve talked, even with what I’ve seen, and I never really saw you as much of a fighter.”
Katie smiled. “This isn’t the first pack he’s had to take an Alpha down on. Just the only one he decided to keep. He ever tell you how we met?”
“He doesn’t talk a lot about the past of the people he works with.”
“It’s not my place.”
“Damn straight,” Katie said but she winked as she said it. “I was being held by human traffickers. I was just a kid and I hadn’t seen too much of the bad yet but it was bad enough. It was a group of alphas from a small town in the middle of nowhere. They snatched kids up on their way home or from the playgrounds or wherever the opportunity presented itself. The local police were sent in with SWAT. And there Jared was.”
“What was Jared doing there?”
“He was a member of the SWAT team. That was it, wasn’t it?” Katie asked. “You left SWAT after that?”
“Yeah. There were too many people that needed my help and the SWAT team was good without me. Still have friends on the team though and they let me know when someone might need our help.”
“Anyway, they all come in and the alphas go ape shit and when the fighting is done, the only alpha left standing was Jared. We’re all cowering in the corner because we don’t know what’s about to happen.”
“All but one was cowering,” Jared interrupted. “This spitfire beta stands up between me and this group of kids huddled in the floor. Demands to know when I’m taking them all home.”
“You kept her,” Jensen said with a grin.
Katie returned it. “He kept me. Took me to the Beta Rights movement and helped me. When I was strong enough, I went back to school. Kept going until I figured out how I could help Jared the way he helped me.”
“And now you’re part of his cleanup crew?”
“Best crew in the country.”
“Damn straight!”
Jensen turned around to find Chris walking down the hallway. He knew his best friend had been there before. He’d been part of the mop up crew and he still visited Jared from time to time to check up on him but Jensen had never been more grateful to see him.
He got up and nearly slammed the alpha over as he wrapped his arms around him and took in his scent.
“Woohhh, big guy,” Chris’s words were soothing but Jensen knew it wasn’t for him. He didn’t pull away from Chris but he turned his head to see Jared’s very impressive frame blocking the hallway.
“Jared, keep Katie company. I just need a minute with my friend.”
Jared stepped closer but he simply ran his thumb over the claim at Jensen’s neck before he stepped back. Jensen couldn’t help but shiver at the touch and Chris let out a small chuckle.
“That claim seems new,” Chris commented as Jensen took a step back.
Jensen led him back out the front door to sit on the banister of the wrap around porch. “It’s something at least.”
“Still not what you wanted.”
“Nope. But he needs time and I have to respect that when he’s given me so much more.”
“And being here?”
Jensen looked around. “It looks nothing like it did when my father lived here. I can’t believe the change in the place. I’m glad that Jared took the Alpha Residence now. I don’t have memories of this place like I do the rest of the town. This was someplace he would never take me. He hated that I was a beta and he never claimed me as an heir.”
“So all new memories?”
“Other than driving past the driveway, yes.”
“And Katie?”
“Is really good at what she does.”
Chris laughed. “That she is. She’s a good friend and a good person to work with. But you already knew that.”
“I did. I just don’t think it hit me, how carefully she’s worked to make me feel comfortable. And she asked to hug Jared and I could see it all. She’s amazing.”
“Don’t tell her. It might get to her head and she already knows we’re lost without her.”
Jensen laughed lightly but it died down when they heard a car on the main road. By the time it turned onto the driveway, Jared and Katie were on the front porch. Jensen didn’t recognize the truck but he knew who it was anyway.
“It’s Jim.”
“Jim?” Katie asked.
“Elder Beaver. Jensen asked him to come take over as Pack Teacher,” Jared said. It didn’t stop him from stepping past Jensen to put him between the approaching car. Jensen didn’t fail to notice that Chris and Katie had subtly done the same.
“He’s not going to hurt me,” Jensen said with a sigh.
Katie turned to look at him and seemed to realize what she’d done. She looked down sheepishly but she didn’t step back. It wasn’t an overt attempt to block Jensen from harm but some careful maneuvering to keep him safe. When Jim stepped out of the truck, he looked around the house and whistled.
“Now that is a pretty picture. She used to be a beauty in her days. It was a shame to see her fall into disrepair.”
Jared stepped off the front porch and walked out to meet the other alpha. “Elder Beaver. Nice to see you still remembered your way home. This is Chris Kane, an alpha with the movement.”
Chris moved forward and took the man’s hand. “I remember you from the conference.”
“The movement sent you here too?” Jim asked.
“Jensen’s best friend. Where he goes, I do,” Chris corrected.
“And this lovely lady is Katie. She’s been the pack go between for our Beta until he was able to come home.”
“A pleasure, Katie.”
“Elder,” she said respectfully.
“Jim, please. I’m old, not dead.”
When Jim looked at Jensen he smiled wider. “About time you took your place here.”
Jensen could feel Jared tense but he didn’t understand what Jim meant. “The alpha was never going to bring me here.”
“You were the rightful heir. It should have been your choice of mates that became the next Alpha and not someone he tried to maneuver into that position.”
Jensen smiled. “It all worked out in the end after all. Thank you for coming home, Jim. You want to come inside? I’m sure you’ll appreciate the amount of work they’ve put into this place in ways I can’t.”
Katie walked Jim back in but Jared stopped Jensen with a hand to his wrist. “Jensen?”
Jensen let out a deep breath. “You know we were a traditional pack. The Alpha wanted us isolated and he kept us that way. Local tradition was that the Alpha’s first born decided the next Pack Alpha. Either the child was an alpha and took over the position, or they became Pack Beta and their mate became the Pack Alpha. My father caged me up to make sure the only ones close to me during heat were his choice of successors. I refused. They were brutal and I became vicious. They tried to claim me but I never let them. I became feral because the only way to keep my father from choosing his successor was to make sure I was never claimed.”
“And who would want a mate that had to be chained or caged all the time?” Chris asked.
“You never said.”
Jensen didn’t answer the pain in Jared’s voice. He couldn’t. Not when Jared’s fingers went instantly to the four scars across his torso and his claim still itched against Jensen’s neck.
“You never actually told him all of it,” Chris admonished.
Jensen leaned back against the post on the fence as he watched Jared walk away from him and down the driveway. He knew the alpha wouldn’t go far, but he needed the distance. He was suddenly grateful that Jared had never given into Jensen’s need for the complete mating claim.
“I never knew how. What happened between us when I went into heat that first time, it was bad. He didn’t need to know that the one thing that had kept me fighting was that no one had ever claimed me. He didn’t need to know that he’d taken the one thing I had left to fight for.”
“You think him finding out here was a good idea?”
Jensen let out a deep breath. “No. Never said it was a good idea. I just ran out of time to tell him.”
Chris shook his head. “You gonna be okay?”
Jensen understood what he was asking. “Yeah. I’ll go talk with Katie and Jim. Let him know I’m ready to talk about it when he is.”
Chris nodded his head but then he ran off the porch and down the drive to where their Pack Alpha had disappeared.
Chris came back without Jared but he stayed and Jim and Katie kept them company until Jared finally returned. They left quickly then and Jensen was left alone with him.
“You’re sure you don’t want to head down into town?” Jared asked quietly after they finished dinner.
Katie had left a fridge full of food and they’d eaten one of the meals she’d prepared ahead for them. Now that they were done an uneasy silence filled the space between them.
“I think being here tonight is enough. Tomorrow I’ll face the others.”
“We can watch a movie?” Jared suggested.
“I wouldn’t be able to keep up with the plot tonight,” Jensen said. “We could turn in early?”
Jared stiffened at the idea and Jensen realized his mistake. The last place Jared wanted to be was closer to the claim he’d put on Jensen and the pressure Jensen had put on him to claim him again.
“I have an idea,” Jensen said quietly. He didn’t ask Jared to follow him but he walked out the door and out onto the wrap around porch. He followed it around to the back of the house and out the yard. The back of the property was edged by the forest and not far from where they were was a stream that Jensen had played in as a child. He walked into the woods and Jared caught up with him.
“Where are we going?”
“Someplace with good memories,” Jensen answered.
It was a ten minute walk but Jensen wasn’t in a hurry. Jared pulled him to a stop when he heard the first trickle of water. Jensen looked up at him with a smile and Jared just nodded before he let Jensen lead the way.
The stream was fuller than Jensen had seen it in a long while but the forest looked healthy and Jensen took a deep breath and sighed. For the first time he could smell Jared wrapped up in this private place of his and it felt right.
“Jensen, what is this place?”
Jared’s voice was quiet, almost reverent and Jensen smiled at his Alpha. “When I was a child I used to come here. I wasn’t allowed to go up to the house but before I became a beta my father had left me to my own devices. My mother was away working so I had the days to myself. I used to come here to explore. I used to think I was the only one that ever sat on the edge of this stream and drank from it.”
“It’s peaceful. No bad memories?”
“None. One year, I managed to escape the chains.”
“You never told me that.”
“I lived in these woods. It was a whole year before they found me and captured me again. That was when I went in the cage full time. But when I was feral, I was closer to my instincts. I could hear them coming, I could smell them. I think being feral changed me a little because when I came back to myself I could still see and hear better than a beta should.”
“I’ve noticed.”
Jensen smiled at him. “You have?”
“You’re far more instinct driven than most of the betas I’ve met. Which is good because I am too.”
Jensen closed the distance between them and when Jared took a step away, he was backed up into a huge tree. Jensen smiled as he stepped into Jared and felt the alpha put his arms around him.
“What are you doing Jensen?”
“I wanted to show you the one place in this town that holds only good memories for me. Maybe make a few new ones.”
“You know-”
“I’m not asking for the claim, Jared. I just … it was stupid of me not to explain it to you. All of it to you. Maybe I wanted to show you something good to make up for that,” Jensen said as he leaned up and placed a chaste kiss on Jared’s lips.
When Jensen pulled away and looked back up at him, Jared cupped Jensen’s face in his hand and pulled him in again. Jensen’s lips parted and Jared took the invitation as he deepened the kiss. Jared dropped his hand from Jensen’s face and pulled him closer as his hands roamed down Jensen’s side to rest low on his back. Jensen wrapped his fingers in Jared’s hair and moaned lightly.
Jared dropped his forehead to rest against Jensen’s, “If this is an apology I may have to start fights to get more.”
Jensen laughed as he tilted his head and let Jared rub his lips across the claim on his neck. Jensen brought his hand up between them and trailed his fingers across the scars on Jared’s stomach at the same time.
“How badly did I mess this up?” Jared asked quietly.
“The claiming?” Jensen asked.
Jared nodded. Jensen wasn’t sure what to say but he decided he needed to be honest. “I was still feral when I went into heat Jared. You were trying to put me someplace safe so I didn’t hurt anyone. You weren’t trying to force the claim on me and I know that. I wasn’t able to understand that back then though. When I fought you, I know you had to put me down. And not because I was a beta and you were the Alpha, but because I was a danger to everyone around me. That we both followed instinct once I submitted wasn’t your fault.”
“But you didn’t see it that way then.”
“No, of course not. I was wild. But that first glimmer of awareness that I had, before you sent me away, that was because of the mating claim. The bond we have gave me the chance to get my sanity back. I’ve talked to a lot of people about it and I think that as crazed as I was, I needed that link to forge my way back. Maybe it messed us up for a while, but it gave me the chance to heal.”
“You said that before.”
“I meant it before. But now you know why I fought when you came in the room instead of being able to back down from the Alpha.”
“Because with your father’s exile it was your right to choose your mate, and the Pack Alpha.”
Jensen nodded. “When you say the next time you make a mating claim it won’t be about heat or any of that, I want that. I want you to know that I choose you. And if I had been able to heal before that claim had been made, I would have chosen you.”
Jared pulled him close and Jensen took a deep breath.
“It’s really nice out here,” Jared said.
Jensen smiled because he knew that whatever else they had to face, they’d managed to get through the one secret he’d kept.
“Yeah, it really is.”
On to Part Four
Author: hunters_retreat
Artist: liliaeth
Genre: RPS
Pairing: Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki
Rating: NC-17
Wordcount: 30K+
Warnings: Physical and emotional abuse, neglect, mentions of past attempted rape, dub-con due to a beta’s heat cycle.
Summary: Three years ago Jensen Ackles had been a feral beta, caged and dangerous to anyone around him. Three years ago the council sent Jared Padalecki and his team into the Two Forks pack to find out the truth about the claims of beta abuse and neglect. What Jared found was a vicious fight to take the pack away from the Alpha and mated to the feral Pack Beta.
Jensen was sent away to heal but Jared stayed behind to clean out the pack and see if it was worth saving. After three years though, Jensen is ready to go home and confront his past. Jared is hesitant but after their reunion at a Beta Right’s conference, he agrees. It isn’t a smooth journey though and not everyone is happy to have Jared as the Alpha of the Two Forks Pack. When outside forces try to tear their fragile pack apart, will they be strong enough to stand together? Or will Jared and Jensen fall apart, and take the Two Forks Pack with them?
“Alpha Padalecki! Alpha! Over here!”
It was a mad house. The end of the conference had come and while Jensen had been happy enough within the walls of the hotel, security had been called in because of the reporters and paparazzi that waited outside the front door.
Jensen had faced this every time he entered and left a conference since he’d started to work with the Beta Rights movement but it never failed to surprise him at the veracity people had when it came to pressing him about his personal life.
Yes, he made himself a public target by speaking but while most people gave him the space and respect he needed to talk about his past, too many people outside of the movement just wanted a sound bite.
“This is a bad idea,” Jared said softly at his side.
Jensen held his head up high as he looked at Jared. “I’ve been doing this with Chris the whole time, Jared. You know that. We can get through. It’s just a short distance to the car. Ignore the reporters and cameras and we’ll be on our way home.”
He saw the way Jared’s eyes flashed, something angry behind them, and he knew that bringing up home was the wrong thing to do. He didn’t know what exactly Jared expected to happen when Jensen returned, but there was so much anger in the alpha. Over the years, Jared had opened up about his father’s experiences as an abused beta but Jensen had never seen the anger in his eyes. What Jensen could remember of Jared’s reaction to his abuse in the beginning, it had always been compassion and sadness that had stuck out the most.
Chris has always said Jared had a hard streak in him. When Jensen was healthy enough to realize just what Jared had to do, he’d asked because he’d needed to be certain that Jared had been strong enough. Cleaning out the pack the way he had wasn’t easy and even an established alpha would have a hard time. Jared had been part of the Beta Rights movement most of his life though and he’d moved from pack to pack at order of the Council. As the Alpha of the Two Forks Pack, he had to establish himself and that would have been a hard fought battle, even after Jensen’s father had been defeated and exiled.
“You two ready to face the crazies?” Chris came up beside Jared, his voice calm as he approached the agitated alpha.
Jared turned his eyes to Chris and let out a deep breath. “Chris…”
There was something in his voice and Jensen gripped Jared’s arm to try to get his attention. Jared didn’t look at him though and it wasn’t until Chris nodded that Jared seemed to relax.
“I got him. Don’t worry Alpha,” Chris said as he bowed his head. “I would never let anything happen to your Beta.” Chris took a step closer then and Jensen watched as he tilted his head in submission to Jared. He was shocked by the display, but Chris was an alpha coming into Jared’s pack. It made sense that he would have to bow to the Pack Alpha.
Jared took a step away from Jensen and turned to face him again. “You’re going to walk out with Chris. I’ll be right in front of you.”
“Why can’t I walk with you?” Jensen asked.
“It’s too much. I told you, I wasn’t ready. I trust you to know what you can handle Jensen. I need you to follow my lead when I say what I can’t.”
Jensen took a deep breath before he nodded. “Of course.”
Jared closed the distance between them then and wrapped him tightly in his arms. “It’ll be okay. I just need to get you to the car safe. I’m too on edge right now.”
When Jared pulled away he bent and pressed a quick kiss to Jensen’s lips. Jensen tangled his fingers in Jared’s hair and when the alpha tried to pull away he kept him close. “We’ll be okay. We’ll get to the car and be done with this. I’m your beta. I know you can do this Jared.”
Jared let out a shuddered breath and nodded his head before Jensen let him pull away.
“Let’s get this done with.”
Jared strode off toward the doors and Jensen followed quickly behind with Chris at his side.
There was security manning the walkway between the hotel and cars that waited for them but the noise was almost deafening. Jared walked with his back tall and he didn’t falter as he ignored the questions that were directed at them. Not even the inappropriately personal questions seemed to get past his cool façade.
Jensen was grateful to have Chris by his side, but he was more worried about Jared.
A commotion broke out behind Jensen and a reporter stuck a microphone close to his face. “Jensen, what can you tell us about the mating claim and the lawsuit that followed? Will there be a second claim-“
His words were cut off as Jared’s hulking figure came up from behind Jensen. He pushed past his beta and forced the report back against the wall of the hotel, one hand on his throat.
“Jared!”
Chris pulled him away but Jensen just wanted to get to Jared to let him know he was fine. “He won’t back off until you’re safe Jensen. Get in the damn car!”
Chris didn’t pull the alpha card on him, but he let his strength be felt as he manhandled Jensen towards the car. His brain caught up with him and he realized his friend was right. Jared had warned him and the only thing he could do was take himself out of the equation. He got to the car and let Chris close the door. A second later it opened again and Jared was in the driver seat beside him and they pulled quickly away.
Chris would follow in the second car but Jensen could see the fury that still gripped Jared. He didn’t know what to say, didn’t know how to cross the silence. He’d seen Jared like that before, when he’d first come to the pack, but Jensen’s memories of it were overcast with the torment of his reality back then.
Silence filled the car and the only sound came from Jared’s hands as he re-gripped the steering wheel, his knuckles white. Jensen let out a deep breath to try to dispel some of his own tension but it was hard when he could feel the anger coming off of his Alpha. The Jared he’d come to know since he’d moved away was generally well tempered and funny. He was laid back about things and he helped Jensen laugh about things that had sometimes tormented him. It was easy to forget, years and miles away, that Jared had a fury that rivaled any Jensen had seen before.
“I won’t apologize for who I am,” Jared broke the silence. “I protect my pack and I will protect you with my last breath. I’m sorry if I scared you or upset you, but I can’t be less than I am.”
Jensen swallowed against the lump in his throat. “I don’t expect you to be. I just forgot. You make it sound easy when we talk. Even when you talk about how frustrated you are or how angry something has made you, I see it after the fact. After you’ve calmed down. I haven’t seen you truly angry since-“
“Since the mating claim.”
Jensen nodded. There was nothing else to say to that.
“I would never hurt you, Jensen.”
Jensen watched Jared’s profile while he drove them away from the incident. “I’m not afraid of you, Jared,” he said as he reached over and took one of Jared’s hands from the wheel. He twined his fingers through Jared’s and settled their hands on his knee. “I feel safe with you. That’s a good thing. No matter how angry you were, I knew I was safe with you. It’s taken a long time for me to feel safe with any alpha, let alone my Alpha when he’s angry.”
“So, take the win?”
Jensen smiled. “Exactly. I’ve had a lot of set backs and I’ve learned where to see the little victories. Getting out of that hotel and sitting in the car with you, heading home to my pack? That’s not a little victory. It’s a major one.”
“Just hope the Beta Rights movement thinks so when that reporter shows what I did.”
“Did you hurt him?”
“No, I just held him until Chris told me you were in the car.”
“Then it was less than he deserved for breaking the security line and coming at me like that. That was amazing control, Alpha.”
Jared looked at him quickly before he turned his eyes back to the road, but Jensen could see the small smile there. It wasn’t enough, but it was a start. Small victories, right?
The hotel room was nice and clean when Jensen took a seat on the bed. It wasn’t home but they were on the way. One more day and they’d be with his pack and Jensen would see what he had to face then. Until, he had the evening with his Alpha and he wasn’t sure what to do with that.
Jared had made sure that Jensen knew he wouldn’t have an intimate relationship with him until they got home, but there was something else Jensen needed and he didn’t know how to ask Jared for it.
“Hey, you hungry?” Jared asked.
Jensen smiled as he grabbed the room service menu and lay down across the bed with it. Jared joined him a moment later and they quickly had dinner ordered. When Jared dropped back onto the bed, Jensen curled in around him and let his head rest on Jared’s shoulder.
“Tired?” Jared asked.
“Just from being cooped up.”
“Feels good to just stretch out,” Jared said.
Jensen nuzzled up against Jared’s neck and he felt the alpha pull him closer. Jared’s nose pressed against the mark at the spot where his shoulder and neck met. The scar was still visible there and Jensen wasn’t subtle as he turned his head to give Jared better access to it.
“Jensen?” his voice sounded wrecked and Jensen knew Jared had to want the same thing that Jensen did.
“Just think about it until after dinner, okay?” Jensen asked softly. “I fought anyone who tried to put a claim on me. You’re the only one who managed. I know you’re not ready for the rest of it and I’m not trying to push. But you are my mate and the claim is faded. I want to feel it again. I want everyone to be able to feel it, fresh and new when I walk back into my pack.”
“Jensen,” Jared whispered his name against his skin. His lips brushed over the claim and Jensen closed his eyes at the feel of his alpha touching in that particular way, in that particular place. “I’ll think about it.”
He didn’t bite down and renew the claim, but he teased his lips over the spot, light brushes and soft kisses until Jensen thought he might need to remove himself from the bed to take care of himself in private.
He was saved from the moment when there was a knock at the door and their dinner arrived.
The air was tense between them as they ate but it wasn’t bad. Jensen watched Jared too closely and Jared tried too hard not to watch Jensen. They were half way through the meal before Jensen finally caught Jared’s eye and he couldn’t help the soft chuckle that escaped his lips.
It made the alpha smile and then they both started to laugh. It broke the tension that had grown between them but Jared’s eyes were still hungry as he watched Jensen.
“Eat your dinner,” Jensen said with a shake of his head. He still had a smile on his face though.
“You’re amazing,” Jared said softly as he picked up his fork and began to dig into the baked potato on his plate.
Jensen just rolled his eyes. “Don’t need to sweet talk me Alpha. I’m already yours.”
Jared let out an undignified snort at that. “Mine? We’ll see about that after dinner.”
Jensen stopped with his fork in mid-air and Jared smiled. “Yeah, I thought about it. Maybe, if I’d put a more recent claim on you I’d have been able to hold myself together better at the hotel this morning. Maybe it will help me keep my temper when we get home. And if the old claim has me so unsettled right now, I can’t imagine how it makes you feel right now.”
“Thank you, Jared,” Jensen said as he reached across the table and took one of the alpha’s hands in his own.
Jared smiled at him and though there was heat behind his eyes, it was mostly affection that shone through. “Chris was right when he told me I was screwed. I can’t deny you anything.”
When Jared pulled his hand away, they finished eating in silence but it was anticipation that flavored the rest of the meal.
When they had finished eating and Jared had left the tray outside their room, Jensen could feel the alpha tense up. He knew he needed to do something to reassure him but he wasn’t sure what.
“Movie?” he asked as he threw the remote at Jared. The alpha caught it and Jensen watched as he turned the TV on and began to look through the channels. Jensen slipped into the bathroom then and completed his nightly ablutions. When he was done, he slipped into the light sleep pants he usually wore and headed into the main room.
Jared was leaning back against the head board as he watched a cooking show.
“Cooking?”
Jared smiled at him. “I wanted to wait for you to start a movie. Mind if I get cleaned up first?”
“Go ahead,” Jensen said as he packed his things away in his overnight case. He let out a deep breath as the door closed between them. When he got to the bed he pulled the covers back and crawled in. He let Jared sleep on the side closest to the door since he knew the alpha was overly concerned about his safety right now. It wasn’t much, but Jensen would do what he could to help Jared feel more settled.
He obviously expected tomorrow to be rough and Jensen didn’t want to add to his stress when he could help it. He didn’t know if he’d even be able to think about that sort of thing come morning.
The cooking show helped take his mind off it all, if only because it was about children and it was funny to watch them try to come up with interesting ways to cook with the different challenges on the show. He didn’t even notice Jared had left the bathroom until he felt the bed dip down beside him.
“Ready to start the movie?” Jensen asked.
It was an action movie they’d both seen. They’d skyped the whole thing together last month in what Jared referred to as their movie dates. Jensen settled against Jared’s chest and smiled at the thought of actually being able to go see a movie with his alpha. Sharing popcorn, soda, stealing his candy. He couldn’t wait to do those things with Jared.
“You seem pleased,” Jared said softly as the movie started.
“Just thinking about taking you to the movies. Or a ball game maybe. Even just out to grab drinks at a bar. We’ve been separated for so long, the idea of going on a real date with you still seems a little surreal.”
Jared gave a soft hum of agreement as he pulled Jensen closer to him. When he began to nuzzle up against Jensen’s ear he realized the alpha had no intention of making Jensen wait to reclaim his mark.
He turned his head to give Jared the room he needed. “Do it,” he whispered. “Claim me again, Alpha.”
“I claim you as my Beta, but soon, I’ll claim you as mine again.” Jared teased his lips across the mark and Jensen squirmed against him. The anticipation made him edgy and he felt Jared’s chuckle through his chest.
Jared sat up and pushed Jensen onto his back before he leaned over and pressed his body over Jensen. Jensen couldn’t help the way his body relaxed under his Alpha. When Jared licked across the old scar Jensen arched up into him.
“Jesus, Jensen,” Jared breathed into his skin.
“Please,” he begged. Jared wasn’t being cruel but Jensen wanted so much more than Jared had offered so far. He knew Jared wanted more, wanted the same things he did, but the alpha forced them to take this slow. To be certain this mating wasn’t as harmful to them both as the last one had been.
“I’ve got you, Jensen,” Jared said as he let his weight settle more firmly onto Jensen’s body. Jensen curled his hands in Jared’s long hair and shivered as Jared’s beard tickled at his sensitive neck. Jared began to lick at the mark again. When he began to suck at it, Jensen’s hips thrust up against Jared. Jared let out a soft hum of approval and Jensen didn’t try to control his reaction to what his alpha was doing to him.
He was nearly whimpering with need before Jared took pity on him. Jared licked across what Jensen was sure would be a spectacular bruise before he finally bit down hard. He felt Jared’s teeth elongate the way only an alpha could, felt the burn of the claim in his blood, and he came against Jared’s hip with a loud cry.
“Jensen, I need…”
“Yes,” Jensen answered before he could ask for what he needed. Jensen didn’t care. Whatever it was, it was yes.
Jared pulled away from him but it was only to push his boxers down his thighs. His cock was hard and leaking as Jared began to stroke himself. He leaned back over Jensen and bit hard at the mark again. When he did, Jensen felt Jared’s come across his naked stomach and chest. Jared’s moans were masked in his neck but Jensen wrapped his arms around Jared’s neck and held him close as he bit his claim into his skin and marked his body with his seed.
He found Jensen’s lips when he’d found his release but his body continued to move as Jared dragged his cock through the come and marked Jensen further with his scent.
When he finally stilled, he took a deep breath and pushed back to stare at Jensen. He closed his eyes and licked his lips. “I shouldn’t have.”
Jensen looked up at the man in front of him. Jared was beautiful. He was tall and strong and proud of his heritage. He was kind and sensitive to the needs of others. He was exposed, physically and emotionally in that moment. It was in Jensen’s hands to hurt him or heal him.
He sat up and pulled Jared’s pants back up and pushed the alpha onto his back. He pulled the blankets up around his waist and settled against his side with his head pillowed on his shoulder where Jared would be able to easily reach the new mark.
When he felt Jared relax under him, he pressed a kiss into Jared’s neck. “I’m glad you did.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“In the morning. They know you’re coming home. I let the others know that you and Jim were both coming home tomorrow.”
“You think they’re ready?”
“I think the only way to find out is once you get there.”
“That’s why you’re so worked up about all this, isn’t it?”
“I’ve spent the last three years trying to make this a safe place for you, Jensen. But I have no idea if it worked or not. There are a few people I still have suspicions about but no one will talk up about them and I haven’t caught them at anything. Maybe they weren’t part of what happened to you, but they might be a part of the rest of it. I can’t just exile people from the pack without cause though.”
“I know, Jared.”
“I’m suspicious of the whole pack. I can’t help it. What they’d become? I can’t forget that they all knew what was being done to you and they did nothing.”
“I don’t know that I can either. We’ll see what happens tomorrow when we get there, alright?” He sat up on his elbow and looked at the alpha. “Tomorrow, we’ll go in there and we’ll take care of each other, right?”
Jared smiled at him, then set his hand on Jensen’s neck and ran his thumb over the mark. “That’s right. I’ll take care of you, Beta.”
“I’ll take care of you, Alpha.”
He leaned down and kissed Jared, something soft and reassuring before he finally let himself rest his head back on the alpha’s shoulder. It wasn’t long before sleep overtook him.
They both had nightmares, but they shushed each other through their waking and kissed each other back to sleep.
Jensen rolled his shoulders to try to alleviate some of the tension but he knew it wouldn’t do any good. They’d just passed the welcome sign for the Two Forks Valley and Jensen had to take deep steadying breaths to keep a straight face. Jared was just as tense as he was. Jared had lived here for the past three years though.
“You’re sure this is okay?” Jared asked again.
Jensen let out a shaky breath. It was after lunch and he was glad they’d stopped early. He wasn’t sure he’d have kept anything down if he’d waited to eat here. “Yes. I told you before. I never lived in the Alpha Residence and my father sure as hell never took me in. Even the cage he held me in was at my mother’s house so no one would see his disgrace. You’ve lived in the Alpha’s Residence. It will smell like you. The last place I want to be today is someplace that doesn’t make me think of you.”
“Alright. I just wanted to be certain. Katie has been staying in your old home and if you would prefer to be there-”
“No. I know I can’t stay there. I don’t need the constant reminder of what happened in those walls.”
Jensen could feel him tense, but Jared didn’t ask again.
The rest of the drive was silent. Thankfully, the Alpha Residence was at the edge of town. The idea was that the Alpha would be the first to get visitors. They would have to come to him before they were allowed to visit the town and the pack. It was an outdated concept, but Jared had reinstituted it while he sorted the pack out. He didn’t want the wrong sort of people coming into the pack when he was in the process of cleaning up the mess of the last Alpha. He was more lax with visitors now, but Jensen knew no one would be allowed to join them until Jensen was comfortable enough to deal with the people in his pack.
When they pulled up to the house, Jensen gasped. He remembered the old place, with its paint peeling gray and the windows shuttered and closed up. Trees had hidden the home from sight and wild bushes had grown across the front porch.
The driveway was now lined with freshly trimmed trees that made the drive seem majestic. The house had been painted a light shade of sage green, welcoming and warm. The bushes had been cut back and brightly colored flowers were planted around the wrap around porch. The windows were wide open and he could make out curtains blowing with the summer breeze.
“Jensen?”
Jared had stopped the car and Jensen got out without answering. He stared at the Alpha’s residence and he let out a shuddered breath.
“Jensen?” Jared was at his side and Jensen turned and dropped his face into his Alpha’s neck. He took a few deep breaths and Jared seemed to understand. He wrapped his arms around Jensen and buried his nose into the mark on Jensen’s skin.
It calmed him until he was ready to face the rest of the house. “I’m ok,” he said softly.
“I know it looks a lot different.”
“It’s good, Jared. It looked decrepit and old before. This looks like a home.”
Jared nodded, then offered Jensen his hand. “Are you ready?”
“Yeah.” Jensen let Jared twine their fingers together as he walked them towards the front door. It wasn’t locked and Jensen stepped into the house with much different expectations than he’d pulled into the drive.
Instead of a place of his father’s dark history and weighted past, Jared had turned this into a residence. It was someplace you wanted to visit. There were pictured on the wall in the front hallway of Jared and his friends. Jensen had seen enough pictures to recognize some of them. Chris was in a few as well and Jensen smiled at this best friend’s face in the picture frame.
The rooms had been stripped of their wallpaper and painted light, airy colors. The wood paneling was replaced with honey wood and all the furniture had been modernized. Jared had spent a lot of time on this place and he’d never said a word to Jensen about it.
When he looked at Jared he shrugged. “I wanted it to be a surprise.”
“It is. It’s a good surprise,” he said as he looked around the modern kitchen. He closed the distance between them again and took a deep breath of Jared’s scent. It filled the home, but there was something else there as well. When he looked up at Jared, his alpha seemed to understand.
“Katie was here. She stepped up to take charge while I was gone. She would have done business here.”
“Or she came to bring muffins,” a female voice called from the front hallway. “I also brought cookies. I’ve heard chocolate was the way to our Beta’s heart.”
Jensen stayed close to Jared but he didn’t feel threatened by the beta that walked into the kitchen. She smiled warmly at Jensen and he knew her voice even if he didn’t know her face.
“Katie, it’s nice to finally meet you.”
She set the tray of food she’d brought down on the table and smiled at Jensen. Her long blond hair hung in curls past her shoulders and she wore no-nonsense jeans and a tee shirt. She was beautiful but there was something wholesome about her. She gave a little shrug of her shoulders as she took a step closer to Jensen.
“Permission to hug my Beta, sir?” she teased.
Jensen let out a bark of laughter and he stepped right into her embrace. He felt her press her nose to his neck and he scented her the same as she was scenting him. She was the warm summer sun at the lake. Honeysuckle vines grown wild and beautiful.
“It is so good to see you, Jensen,” she said softly.
When he stepped back she looked him over for a few moments before she finally took a step back. “I figured you might want something after the drive. Not too heavy. Matt had the kids help me pick blueberries for the muffins. I made sure the fridge was stocked too. If you need anything, just let me know. I don’t know all of your favorites, but I did my best. I’m sure you’ll want to start doing your own thing soon enough, but if there’s anything you need while you’re getting settled in, I’m your girl.”
She sat at the table and Jensen was drawn down to sit with her. He nibbled on muffins and Katie made lemon chamomile tea to drink. Jared stood back in the kitchen and watched until Katie noticed.
“Beta, may I have permission to hug the crap out of the Alpha now?”
Jensen had already known how good Katie was at her job. The way she phrased her request though made him look twice at her. If she had made a formal request it would have bothered him. It would have felt like she wanted to imply something about her relationship with Jared. The informality of it, while still asking, made their relationship feel more like siblings than anything else. If she’d called Jared her alpha, it would have represented a claim that Jensen wasn’t sure he’d have handled well, but if she’d called him Jensen’s Alpha it might have brought up old memories he didn’t want to face just yet.
He smiled as he reached out and touched her hand lightly in an affectionate gesture. Her eyes lit up when he did and her smile grew. “Hug away.”
Katie moved around the kitchen slowly and Jensen knew it was to keep either of them from having a startle reflex. When she stopped in front of Jared she waited with a grin. He snatched her up off the floor and swung her around with a light laugh. Jensen closed his eyes and enjoyed the sound of their joined laughter as it filled the house.
“Did I miss anything while I was gone?”
“Packs been quiet. Nothing to do but clean up and wait for you boys. We did get to see your magnificence on TV though.”
“The reporter?” Jared cringed.
“Yep,” she said with a smile. “The news is talking about what amazing control you have that you didn’t rip the guy to pieces.”
“That’s what they took away from that?” Jared asked.
Jensen shook his head. “I saw the rage in your eyes, Jared, and it was absolutely amazing that the reporter walked out with just a bruise from where you held him back.”
“At least the Beta Rights movement never labeled you a saint. You were always the wild one, anyway.”
“What?” Jensen asked.
Katie smiled at Jensen as she came back to join him at the table. Jared sat on Jensen’s other side and grabbed a chocolate chip cookie to eat.
“When they needed a cool head to lead a team, they sent Chris. When they thought there might be a real fight, that they needed someone with more ingrained instincts, they send Jared.”
“All the times we’ve talked, even with what I’ve seen, and I never really saw you as much of a fighter.”
Katie smiled. “This isn’t the first pack he’s had to take an Alpha down on. Just the only one he decided to keep. He ever tell you how we met?”
“He doesn’t talk a lot about the past of the people he works with.”
“It’s not my place.”
“Damn straight,” Katie said but she winked as she said it. “I was being held by human traffickers. I was just a kid and I hadn’t seen too much of the bad yet but it was bad enough. It was a group of alphas from a small town in the middle of nowhere. They snatched kids up on their way home or from the playgrounds or wherever the opportunity presented itself. The local police were sent in with SWAT. And there Jared was.”
“What was Jared doing there?”
“He was a member of the SWAT team. That was it, wasn’t it?” Katie asked. “You left SWAT after that?”
“Yeah. There were too many people that needed my help and the SWAT team was good without me. Still have friends on the team though and they let me know when someone might need our help.”
“Anyway, they all come in and the alphas go ape shit and when the fighting is done, the only alpha left standing was Jared. We’re all cowering in the corner because we don’t know what’s about to happen.”
“All but one was cowering,” Jared interrupted. “This spitfire beta stands up between me and this group of kids huddled in the floor. Demands to know when I’m taking them all home.”
“You kept her,” Jensen said with a grin.
Katie returned it. “He kept me. Took me to the Beta Rights movement and helped me. When I was strong enough, I went back to school. Kept going until I figured out how I could help Jared the way he helped me.”
“And now you’re part of his cleanup crew?”
“Best crew in the country.”
“Damn straight!”
Jensen turned around to find Chris walking down the hallway. He knew his best friend had been there before. He’d been part of the mop up crew and he still visited Jared from time to time to check up on him but Jensen had never been more grateful to see him.
He got up and nearly slammed the alpha over as he wrapped his arms around him and took in his scent.
“Woohhh, big guy,” Chris’s words were soothing but Jensen knew it wasn’t for him. He didn’t pull away from Chris but he turned his head to see Jared’s very impressive frame blocking the hallway.
“Jared, keep Katie company. I just need a minute with my friend.”
Jared stepped closer but he simply ran his thumb over the claim at Jensen’s neck before he stepped back. Jensen couldn’t help but shiver at the touch and Chris let out a small chuckle.
“That claim seems new,” Chris commented as Jensen took a step back.
Jensen led him back out the front door to sit on the banister of the wrap around porch. “It’s something at least.”
“Still not what you wanted.”
“Nope. But he needs time and I have to respect that when he’s given me so much more.”
“And being here?”
Jensen looked around. “It looks nothing like it did when my father lived here. I can’t believe the change in the place. I’m glad that Jared took the Alpha Residence now. I don’t have memories of this place like I do the rest of the town. This was someplace he would never take me. He hated that I was a beta and he never claimed me as an heir.”
“So all new memories?”
“Other than driving past the driveway, yes.”
“And Katie?”
“Is really good at what she does.”
Chris laughed. “That she is. She’s a good friend and a good person to work with. But you already knew that.”
“I did. I just don’t think it hit me, how carefully she’s worked to make me feel comfortable. And she asked to hug Jared and I could see it all. She’s amazing.”
“Don’t tell her. It might get to her head and she already knows we’re lost without her.”
Jensen laughed lightly but it died down when they heard a car on the main road. By the time it turned onto the driveway, Jared and Katie were on the front porch. Jensen didn’t recognize the truck but he knew who it was anyway.
“It’s Jim.”
“Jim?” Katie asked.
“Elder Beaver. Jensen asked him to come take over as Pack Teacher,” Jared said. It didn’t stop him from stepping past Jensen to put him between the approaching car. Jensen didn’t fail to notice that Chris and Katie had subtly done the same.
“He’s not going to hurt me,” Jensen said with a sigh.
Katie turned to look at him and seemed to realize what she’d done. She looked down sheepishly but she didn’t step back. It wasn’t an overt attempt to block Jensen from harm but some careful maneuvering to keep him safe. When Jim stepped out of the truck, he looked around the house and whistled.
“Now that is a pretty picture. She used to be a beauty in her days. It was a shame to see her fall into disrepair.”
Jared stepped off the front porch and walked out to meet the other alpha. “Elder Beaver. Nice to see you still remembered your way home. This is Chris Kane, an alpha with the movement.”
Chris moved forward and took the man’s hand. “I remember you from the conference.”
“The movement sent you here too?” Jim asked.
“Jensen’s best friend. Where he goes, I do,” Chris corrected.
“And this lovely lady is Katie. She’s been the pack go between for our Beta until he was able to come home.”
“A pleasure, Katie.”
“Elder,” she said respectfully.
“Jim, please. I’m old, not dead.”
When Jim looked at Jensen he smiled wider. “About time you took your place here.”
Jensen could feel Jared tense but he didn’t understand what Jim meant. “The alpha was never going to bring me here.”
“You were the rightful heir. It should have been your choice of mates that became the next Alpha and not someone he tried to maneuver into that position.”
Jensen smiled. “It all worked out in the end after all. Thank you for coming home, Jim. You want to come inside? I’m sure you’ll appreciate the amount of work they’ve put into this place in ways I can’t.”
Katie walked Jim back in but Jared stopped Jensen with a hand to his wrist. “Jensen?”
Jensen let out a deep breath. “You know we were a traditional pack. The Alpha wanted us isolated and he kept us that way. Local tradition was that the Alpha’s first born decided the next Pack Alpha. Either the child was an alpha and took over the position, or they became Pack Beta and their mate became the Pack Alpha. My father caged me up to make sure the only ones close to me during heat were his choice of successors. I refused. They were brutal and I became vicious. They tried to claim me but I never let them. I became feral because the only way to keep my father from choosing his successor was to make sure I was never claimed.”
“And who would want a mate that had to be chained or caged all the time?” Chris asked.
“You never said.”
Jensen didn’t answer the pain in Jared’s voice. He couldn’t. Not when Jared’s fingers went instantly to the four scars across his torso and his claim still itched against Jensen’s neck.
“You never actually told him all of it,” Chris admonished.
Jensen leaned back against the post on the fence as he watched Jared walk away from him and down the driveway. He knew the alpha wouldn’t go far, but he needed the distance. He was suddenly grateful that Jared had never given into Jensen’s need for the complete mating claim.
“I never knew how. What happened between us when I went into heat that first time, it was bad. He didn’t need to know that the one thing that had kept me fighting was that no one had ever claimed me. He didn’t need to know that he’d taken the one thing I had left to fight for.”
“You think him finding out here was a good idea?”
Jensen let out a deep breath. “No. Never said it was a good idea. I just ran out of time to tell him.”
Chris shook his head. “You gonna be okay?”
Jensen understood what he was asking. “Yeah. I’ll go talk with Katie and Jim. Let him know I’m ready to talk about it when he is.”
Chris nodded his head but then he ran off the porch and down the drive to where their Pack Alpha had disappeared.
Chris came back without Jared but he stayed and Jim and Katie kept them company until Jared finally returned. They left quickly then and Jensen was left alone with him.
“You’re sure you don’t want to head down into town?” Jared asked quietly after they finished dinner.
Katie had left a fridge full of food and they’d eaten one of the meals she’d prepared ahead for them. Now that they were done an uneasy silence filled the space between them.
“I think being here tonight is enough. Tomorrow I’ll face the others.”
“We can watch a movie?” Jared suggested.
“I wouldn’t be able to keep up with the plot tonight,” Jensen said. “We could turn in early?”
Jared stiffened at the idea and Jensen realized his mistake. The last place Jared wanted to be was closer to the claim he’d put on Jensen and the pressure Jensen had put on him to claim him again.
“I have an idea,” Jensen said quietly. He didn’t ask Jared to follow him but he walked out the door and out onto the wrap around porch. He followed it around to the back of the house and out the yard. The back of the property was edged by the forest and not far from where they were was a stream that Jensen had played in as a child. He walked into the woods and Jared caught up with him.
“Where are we going?”
“Someplace with good memories,” Jensen answered.
It was a ten minute walk but Jensen wasn’t in a hurry. Jared pulled him to a stop when he heard the first trickle of water. Jensen looked up at him with a smile and Jared just nodded before he let Jensen lead the way.
The stream was fuller than Jensen had seen it in a long while but the forest looked healthy and Jensen took a deep breath and sighed. For the first time he could smell Jared wrapped up in this private place of his and it felt right.
“Jensen, what is this place?”
Jared’s voice was quiet, almost reverent and Jensen smiled at his Alpha. “When I was a child I used to come here. I wasn’t allowed to go up to the house but before I became a beta my father had left me to my own devices. My mother was away working so I had the days to myself. I used to come here to explore. I used to think I was the only one that ever sat on the edge of this stream and drank from it.”
“It’s peaceful. No bad memories?”
“None. One year, I managed to escape the chains.”
“You never told me that.”
“I lived in these woods. It was a whole year before they found me and captured me again. That was when I went in the cage full time. But when I was feral, I was closer to my instincts. I could hear them coming, I could smell them. I think being feral changed me a little because when I came back to myself I could still see and hear better than a beta should.”
“I’ve noticed.”
Jensen smiled at him. “You have?”
“You’re far more instinct driven than most of the betas I’ve met. Which is good because I am too.”
Jensen closed the distance between them and when Jared took a step away, he was backed up into a huge tree. Jensen smiled as he stepped into Jared and felt the alpha put his arms around him.
“What are you doing Jensen?”
“I wanted to show you the one place in this town that holds only good memories for me. Maybe make a few new ones.”
“You know-”
“I’m not asking for the claim, Jared. I just … it was stupid of me not to explain it to you. All of it to you. Maybe I wanted to show you something good to make up for that,” Jensen said as he leaned up and placed a chaste kiss on Jared’s lips.
When Jensen pulled away and looked back up at him, Jared cupped Jensen’s face in his hand and pulled him in again. Jensen’s lips parted and Jared took the invitation as he deepened the kiss. Jared dropped his hand from Jensen’s face and pulled him closer as his hands roamed down Jensen’s side to rest low on his back. Jensen wrapped his fingers in Jared’s hair and moaned lightly.
Jared dropped his forehead to rest against Jensen’s, “If this is an apology I may have to start fights to get more.”
Jensen laughed as he tilted his head and let Jared rub his lips across the claim on his neck. Jensen brought his hand up between them and trailed his fingers across the scars on Jared’s stomach at the same time.
“How badly did I mess this up?” Jared asked quietly.
“The claiming?” Jensen asked.
Jared nodded. Jensen wasn’t sure what to say but he decided he needed to be honest. “I was still feral when I went into heat Jared. You were trying to put me someplace safe so I didn’t hurt anyone. You weren’t trying to force the claim on me and I know that. I wasn’t able to understand that back then though. When I fought you, I know you had to put me down. And not because I was a beta and you were the Alpha, but because I was a danger to everyone around me. That we both followed instinct once I submitted wasn’t your fault.”
“But you didn’t see it that way then.”
“No, of course not. I was wild. But that first glimmer of awareness that I had, before you sent me away, that was because of the mating claim. The bond we have gave me the chance to get my sanity back. I’ve talked to a lot of people about it and I think that as crazed as I was, I needed that link to forge my way back. Maybe it messed us up for a while, but it gave me the chance to heal.”
“You said that before.”
“I meant it before. But now you know why I fought when you came in the room instead of being able to back down from the Alpha.”
“Because with your father’s exile it was your right to choose your mate, and the Pack Alpha.”
Jensen nodded. “When you say the next time you make a mating claim it won’t be about heat or any of that, I want that. I want you to know that I choose you. And if I had been able to heal before that claim had been made, I would have chosen you.”
Jared pulled him close and Jensen took a deep breath.
“It’s really nice out here,” Jared said.
Jensen smiled because he knew that whatever else they had to face, they’d managed to get through the one secret he’d kept.
“Yeah, it really is.”
On to Part Four