Polar Bear!Beorn Among the Penguins (slightly morbid humor)

[huinare]

Crackfic ahoy.  Um, the taskforce made me do it.  Yeah.
Dwimordene can be thanked for the title, but the ensuing mess is my responsibility.

Disclaimer: These characters are not my intellectual property, and even if they were nobody would pay me for this thing.
Warnings: Observe the title.

Comments

[dwimordene_2011]

Ha!

Oh dear, this reminds me of Thundera Tiger when she gets in the mood to write humor - the arguments, the definitions, and I love the mittens threaded through the coat so they can't get lost. Perfect touch, that. Not that it helped in the end.

never did they accept his peace offering, having no love of knitted things - chortle! So not because he totally destroyed several penguins in a wanton attack, but because they don't like mittens, eh?

I love it! I love also Saruman the Pedantic and his note on species distribution.

Thank you, Huin!

[huinare]

I'm afraid I've not yet encountered her work.

The mittens were originally just going to get that single mention at the beginning, but they kept asserting themselves. X)

Re: Saruman the Pedantic. Conversation in my head:
Huin: "It's no big deal; I mean, Beorn isn't exactly a naturally occurring polar bear anyway."
Saruman: "It's the principle of the thing. Also, the correct term for an egg-laying animal is oviparous. Don't pretend you don't know."
Huin: "Fine, you can have the species distribution thing."

[dwimordene_2011]

Dear Saruman - the correct term for egg-laying animal post-development of Latin is oviparous. What's it called in Middle-earth during this time-period, eh?

;-)

[huinare]

Dwimordene:
Do you suppose that we here in Middle-earth lack distinct commonplace terms and specialist terms for given phenomena? Seeing as ‘egg-laying’ is evidently an acceptable translation of the vernacular, I fail to see how ‘oviparous’ is unacceptable to translate an educated person’s speech.
Pedantically,
Saruman

(Saruman, be polite or I’ll write another cute companion animal for you…)

[lindahoyland]

Poor penguins! This was great fun!

[huinare]

Thanks, Linda, glad you enjoyed it!

[engarian]

Oh, you are on a roll! I am glad that Saruman spoke up, however, since the very same thought had been in my own mind.

- Erulisse (one L)

[huinare]

Humorfic is evidently the current stand-in for actual meaningful writing. Two long WiPs gathering dust, one demanding massive edits, two other smaller fics that haven't seen the light of day for months, haven't started on my LoTR Community anniversary ficlet yet...and what do I do? This. =D

[engarian]

Humorfic is still fic. I just started the Anniversary fic two days ago and it won't be a long one - less than 1000 words more than likely. But it's coming together.

The WIPs and the edits - I think we're all in that mess. My edits are getting quite strident because they want to be posted and public again, but the red ink is overriding the original black....I only like colors like this in my sunrise and sunsets.

- Erulisse (one L)

[huinare]

I only like colors like this in my sunrise and sunsets.

Ha! I hate to think of the red ghastly mess that would ensure if I tried to red-ink on hardcopy. Complete with snarky cartoons in the margins no doubt..

[missingislands]

Hahaaahaa. The phrasing was perfect. I don't remember where exactly/if Tolkien write something like that, but "having no love for.." sound so very much like one of his sentences.

And the mittens!

[huinare]

I'd almost guarantee he's used it somewhere. If not 'no love for,' I'm certain he's used 'no love of..' In humorfic I love randomly intermingling Tolkienesque phrases and sentences with modern/causal sentences ("...with those mittens with the string that goes through your coat so you can’t lose them" being one of the latter. <3 Radagast's mittens.)

[huinare]

Thanks!

Some people have Aragorn or Frodo or someone living in their heads. I've got Saruman. Someone's gotta do it.

[huinare]

You seem to prefer less popular characters too. A Tolkien fan after my own heart.

This is fun, mind if I add you?