Comments | hp_literotica: "Burial" Lucius/Severus (R)

underlucius in hp_literotica

"Burial" Lucius/Severus (R)

Jan 02, 2006 15:38

Burial
by underlucius
Warnings: chan. Lucius is 19, Severus 13.
Disclaimer: JKR owns Lucius and Severus not me. Sadly
Notes: beta-ed by the inestimable eumenides1 who has to battle with the ebil Microsoft grammar check just to beta my scribblings. Dedicated to sinick for being this very Severus.

( Burial )

titles: a-l, lucius, snape/lucius, underlucius, severus snape

Comments 4

venivincere January 2 2006, 08:17:16 UTC

This line in particular evokes the putting away of old things and taking up of new, though there's no obvious reason for it -- just the way I felt while reading: I tell him cabbage and king things. This is a vivid picture of Lucius made all the more real (and hot) by the attention paid to the differences in their ages. I saw Severus' youth against his fuller form, and it made his surrender that much more significant. Very nicely done.

underlucius January 2 2006, 11:37:48 UTC

Thank you! I was trying to show the difference between Lucius who was older and attempting to rationalise - and then being exasperated and amused in turns by the minx, and an impatient child who wanted it all NOW.

Glad you liked it and thank you for commenting.

xxx

(The comment has been removed)

underlucius January 3 2006, 14:25:59 UTC

Thank you so much!

xxx

ladylornadoone January 3 2006, 17:28:43 UTC

Oh my goodness, that was very good. It made me feel very conflicting emotions- I was disturbed, I was charmed. It was like I was shown the keyhole to the door of the past, and told to look through. It was a great read. :) I've always been too shy to say anything, but I've wanted to friend you for ages. Would you mind?