FIC: Save Me From Myself [Harry/Draco - NC-17]
Author: Anonymous
Title: Save Me From Myself
Characters/Pairings: Harry/Draco
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Major Character Death
Word Count: ~1,500
Prompt: #121 “You’re never going to save the world if you can’t save me.” (by winterstorrm)
Disclaimer All JKRs, not mine. I’m just having fun. AU because irrespective of canon ages at this point, all of the characters are above the age of consent.
Notes: Thanks so much to NS. for the beta and to N. for all of the help with the poetry. Thanks also to the mods for running such an awesome fest. I also hope the person who left the prompt enjoys this.
Harry’s back arched into the feeling of Draco pushing inside him as the Room of Requirement filled with the sound of breath coming in hard, hot pants. Cries were stifled by kisses and teeth biting down on shoulders leaving crescent-shapes for tomorrow.
“Why do you always follow me here, Potter. What do you want?”
This. Just this. Always.
“You’re up to something, I know it.” Harry’s voice sounded broken and husky, punctuated by pants and groans as Draco thrust harder into him.
“There’s nothing - fuck - there’s nothing you can do about it anyway.”
Draco’s voice sounded shattered and small, travelling through the silence of the room and the pants of the two boys.
Little boy lost.
Draco thrust again, grappling at Harry’s tie to pull him up into a kiss and bending him almost double.
They never fully undressed for this - not really. Harry could feel the material from Draco’s trousers and the cold, hard metal of the zip hitting against him as Draco thrust deeper. It was the most beautiful sort of pain. Everything with Draco made him hurt but it always hurt in such a good way Harry couldn’t bring himself to care.
Shirts were rumpled and un-tucked, Draco still wore his shoes and socks hardly undressed at all and only Harry was naked from the waist down. It made him feel even more lost and vulnerable when Draco would arch back, pressing his long fingers into bare skin as he stared at Harry with intense grey eyes before pulling him into another scorching kiss.
It seemed too soon for it to be over, when Draco reached down between them pulling Harry to completion, shuddering into his own with a final gasp before collapsing on Harry.
They lay like that just for a moment, as the room stayed still.
Nothing else moved.
There was only breathing, and silence.
Eventually Draco rolled off Harry and began to pull up his trousers, properly tucking his shirt in and buckling his belt.
“Why did you do it?”
“What?”
“Take the Dark Mark.”
“Oh. How do you know I did?”
Draco never took his shirt off, not anymore.
“Of course you did. He wants to kill me, you know.”
“Yes.”
“Don’t you care?”
“I - ” Draco stopped and looked away from Harry with a grimace. “My father.”
“It’s no excuse, Draco. Your bloody father is a total twat and a racist. You don’t have to follow him so blindly.”
“What would you know, Potter?!” They were spitting, hissing, violent words now as Draco turned to Harry, his face contorted in a grimace of pain and confusion. “You don’t know anything about it.”
“I know he wants to hurt me and has hurt my family and friends but yet you follow him despite of that.”
“I didn’t want any of this. Don’t you understand?! None of it.” Draco stared at Harry for the longest moment, his hair still wild from where Harry’s hands had tangled and his face flushed from anger and the exertions of sex.
“I don’t understand. Do you want me to die?”
Harry’s voice was so soft he wasn’t sure if he had spoken at all. He looked down at his legs, still pale and naked and bruised from where Draco’s fingers had gripped. He tried to cover himself with his shirt feeling horribly exposed.
“Harry.”
Draco had never said it before. It had always been Scarhead or Potter or Boy Wonder, taunting and cruel at first, then fascinated and finally shaking with the pressure of coming and speaking at the same time.
The use of his given name made Harry raise his eyes from the ground and Draco caught his chin, forcing their eyes to meet.
I don’t want you to die, the look said, wide-eyed and frightened. Instead of speaking Draco pulled Harry closer to him.
“Draco…” Harry mumbled against Draco’s lips as he felt his lower lip being nipped and his mouth was caught in a heated kiss.
“Harry…”
Harry didn’t care anymore that he was naked and exposed because he knew Draco would be again soon, he, Harry was going to make sure of that.
They kissed into the silence and the darkness and tumbled back to the floor together, clinging to one another as if they could never let go.
~
It was a few days later when Harry found himself running after Draco towards the Prefect’s bathroom, following him quickly and ignoring the crowds of students giggling as he tripped over his feet in his hurry to reach Draco.
When he arrived in the bathroom he saw Draco, bent over the sink, his body shaking with sobs.
Harry had never seen Draco cry before.
“Draco?” Harry hesitated in the doorway and Draco spun around, looking furiously at Harry and horribly ashamed.
“Get out, Potter - I mean it.”
“But Draco…” Harry advanced with his arm out tentatively, wanting to touch Draco, to bundle him into his arms and make everything okay.
“No! Please - you can’t - you don’t want to, you don’t know what I have to do…”
“Then tell me!”
“Don’t look at me like that, Harry - please don’t look at me like that…” Draco looked defeated and then looked back up at Harry who was still standing, hand outstretched foolishly towards Draco, his wand gripped in his other hand which hung uselessly at his side.
“Please…it will be okay, I promise - we can get you out, me and Ron and Hermione…I will keep you safe, I promise. I will save you from him.”
Draco’s laugh was bitter and his face twisted.
“You, Potter? You are nothing but a teenager with a hero complex, you can’t save me,” Draco’s voice cracked, “No one can.”
“Let me try - please…” Harry moved closer and Draco flinched away.
“Get out, I swear - I’ll - just get OUT!”
“No, you wouldn’t hurt me I know you I fucking love-”
“-Don’t say it, don’t you dare bloody say it…”
“I fucking love you.”
The water pounded on the floor and Draco’s face contorted with rage, his wand hand trembling as he held it out before him, pointed at Harry.
“Do you know what you have done? How much you torture me every day staring at me, following me - you’re everywhere, Potter!” Draco gestured to his head, a quick, wild motion, “You’re here,” he held his hand over his heart and sneered, “and now you’re here…damn you, Harry!”
“I don’t mean to torture you - I don’t, truly. You don’t make me feel like that.”
“No?” Draco’s lips turned up into a smile, his eyes cold and hard. “Well let me show you how it feels. Cruci-”
“SECTUMSPEMPRA!”
The look on Draco’s face turned from one of violent anger and distress to one of shock and then his mouth twisted in a gruesome smile as he fell to the floor, clutching at his chest.
Harry advanced towards Draco holding his breath as he saw dark stripes of blood staining the boy’s shirt and pooling on the floor, mingling with the water.
Harry clutched desperately at Draco’s hand which squeezed his own weakly. “I wouldn’t have done it…you know I wouldn’t have done, I couldn’t.”
“Ssssh - I know, I know…” Harry felt hot, choking tears rise in his throat as the hand holding his own loosened its grip still further, watching desperately as more blood pooled onto the ground. Why was there so much blood?
Harry looked desperately around for someone, anyone, to come and help to make it all okay again.
No one came.
Harry sobbed into the water on the floor, cradling Draco’s head in his hands and kissing his lips which responded and then stilled. He moved back to see Draco’s face, stained with tears and water and blood.
“Harry?” Draco’s voice was barely a whisper now and Harry had to lean close to hear his words, “You’re never going to save the world if you can’t save me.”
“Oh gods, Draco, please…”
Harry whimpered into the rushing water and the screams of the ghosts, his wand clattering to the floor.
The light left Draco’s eyes and the rest was silence.
~
It was midnight and the Battle of Hogwarts was over.
In the sky two stars, brighter than the rest, nestled together side by side.
The world beneath them burned.
~
The terrible, beautiful, trembling heat
The darkness, the whispers, blood under his feet,
The lion, the snake, the silence and breathing,
The unbearable world he was leaving.
Two children at first, darkness and light,
Hiding with shadows in the cover of night,
The seductive and tempting raw power of sin,
Children fighting in battles no one could win.
The passion, the darkness, the whimpers and sighs
The death and destruction, the love and the lies,
The skies pouring open and crying out rain
Screaming from battle and shattering pain.
Harry and Draco and heads in the clouds
Souls in the sky and bodies in shrouds
Too young to live with the horrors of war,
Sharing the sky with the ones gone before.
Title: Save Me From Myself
Characters/Pairings: Harry/Draco
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Major Character Death
Word Count: ~1,500
Prompt: #121 “You’re never going to save the world if you can’t save me.” (by winterstorrm)
Disclaimer All JKRs, not mine. I’m just having fun. AU because irrespective of canon ages at this point, all of the characters are above the age of consent.
Notes: Thanks so much to NS. for the beta and to N. for all of the help with the poetry. Thanks also to the mods for running such an awesome fest. I also hope the person who left the prompt enjoys this.
Harry’s back arched into the feeling of Draco pushing inside him as the Room of Requirement filled with the sound of breath coming in hard, hot pants. Cries were stifled by kisses and teeth biting down on shoulders leaving crescent-shapes for tomorrow.
“Why do you always follow me here, Potter. What do you want?”
This. Just this. Always.
“You’re up to something, I know it.” Harry’s voice sounded broken and husky, punctuated by pants and groans as Draco thrust harder into him.
“There’s nothing - fuck - there’s nothing you can do about it anyway.”
Draco’s voice sounded shattered and small, travelling through the silence of the room and the pants of the two boys.
Little boy lost.
Draco thrust again, grappling at Harry’s tie to pull him up into a kiss and bending him almost double.
They never fully undressed for this - not really. Harry could feel the material from Draco’s trousers and the cold, hard metal of the zip hitting against him as Draco thrust deeper. It was the most beautiful sort of pain. Everything with Draco made him hurt but it always hurt in such a good way Harry couldn’t bring himself to care.
Shirts were rumpled and un-tucked, Draco still wore his shoes and socks hardly undressed at all and only Harry was naked from the waist down. It made him feel even more lost and vulnerable when Draco would arch back, pressing his long fingers into bare skin as he stared at Harry with intense grey eyes before pulling him into another scorching kiss.
It seemed too soon for it to be over, when Draco reached down between them pulling Harry to completion, shuddering into his own with a final gasp before collapsing on Harry.
They lay like that just for a moment, as the room stayed still.
Nothing else moved.
There was only breathing, and silence.
Eventually Draco rolled off Harry and began to pull up his trousers, properly tucking his shirt in and buckling his belt.
“Why did you do it?”
“What?”
“Take the Dark Mark.”
“Oh. How do you know I did?”
Draco never took his shirt off, not anymore.
“Of course you did. He wants to kill me, you know.”
“Yes.”
“Don’t you care?”
“I - ” Draco stopped and looked away from Harry with a grimace. “My father.”
“It’s no excuse, Draco. Your bloody father is a total twat and a racist. You don’t have to follow him so blindly.”
“What would you know, Potter?!” They were spitting, hissing, violent words now as Draco turned to Harry, his face contorted in a grimace of pain and confusion. “You don’t know anything about it.”
“I know he wants to hurt me and has hurt my family and friends but yet you follow him despite of that.”
“I didn’t want any of this. Don’t you understand?! None of it.” Draco stared at Harry for the longest moment, his hair still wild from where Harry’s hands had tangled and his face flushed from anger and the exertions of sex.
“I don’t understand. Do you want me to die?”
Harry’s voice was so soft he wasn’t sure if he had spoken at all. He looked down at his legs, still pale and naked and bruised from where Draco’s fingers had gripped. He tried to cover himself with his shirt feeling horribly exposed.
“Harry.”
Draco had never said it before. It had always been Scarhead or Potter or Boy Wonder, taunting and cruel at first, then fascinated and finally shaking with the pressure of coming and speaking at the same time.
The use of his given name made Harry raise his eyes from the ground and Draco caught his chin, forcing their eyes to meet.
I don’t want you to die, the look said, wide-eyed and frightened. Instead of speaking Draco pulled Harry closer to him.
“Draco…” Harry mumbled against Draco’s lips as he felt his lower lip being nipped and his mouth was caught in a heated kiss.
“Harry…”
Harry didn’t care anymore that he was naked and exposed because he knew Draco would be again soon, he, Harry was going to make sure of that.
They kissed into the silence and the darkness and tumbled back to the floor together, clinging to one another as if they could never let go.
~
It was a few days later when Harry found himself running after Draco towards the Prefect’s bathroom, following him quickly and ignoring the crowds of students giggling as he tripped over his feet in his hurry to reach Draco.
When he arrived in the bathroom he saw Draco, bent over the sink, his body shaking with sobs.
Harry had never seen Draco cry before.
“Draco?” Harry hesitated in the doorway and Draco spun around, looking furiously at Harry and horribly ashamed.
“Get out, Potter - I mean it.”
“But Draco…” Harry advanced with his arm out tentatively, wanting to touch Draco, to bundle him into his arms and make everything okay.
“No! Please - you can’t - you don’t want to, you don’t know what I have to do…”
“Then tell me!”
“Don’t look at me like that, Harry - please don’t look at me like that…” Draco looked defeated and then looked back up at Harry who was still standing, hand outstretched foolishly towards Draco, his wand gripped in his other hand which hung uselessly at his side.
“Please…it will be okay, I promise - we can get you out, me and Ron and Hermione…I will keep you safe, I promise. I will save you from him.”
Draco’s laugh was bitter and his face twisted.
“You, Potter? You are nothing but a teenager with a hero complex, you can’t save me,” Draco’s voice cracked, “No one can.”
“Let me try - please…” Harry moved closer and Draco flinched away.
“Get out, I swear - I’ll - just get OUT!”
“No, you wouldn’t hurt me I know you I fucking love-”
“-Don’t say it, don’t you dare bloody say it…”
“I fucking love you.”
The water pounded on the floor and Draco’s face contorted with rage, his wand hand trembling as he held it out before him, pointed at Harry.
“Do you know what you have done? How much you torture me every day staring at me, following me - you’re everywhere, Potter!” Draco gestured to his head, a quick, wild motion, “You’re here,” he held his hand over his heart and sneered, “and now you’re here…damn you, Harry!”
“I don’t mean to torture you - I don’t, truly. You don’t make me feel like that.”
“No?” Draco’s lips turned up into a smile, his eyes cold and hard. “Well let me show you how it feels. Cruci-”
“SECTUMSPEMPRA!”
The look on Draco’s face turned from one of violent anger and distress to one of shock and then his mouth twisted in a gruesome smile as he fell to the floor, clutching at his chest.
Harry advanced towards Draco holding his breath as he saw dark stripes of blood staining the boy’s shirt and pooling on the floor, mingling with the water.
Harry clutched desperately at Draco’s hand which squeezed his own weakly. “I wouldn’t have done it…you know I wouldn’t have done, I couldn’t.”
“Ssssh - I know, I know…” Harry felt hot, choking tears rise in his throat as the hand holding his own loosened its grip still further, watching desperately as more blood pooled onto the ground. Why was there so much blood?
Harry looked desperately around for someone, anyone, to come and help to make it all okay again.
No one came.
Harry sobbed into the water on the floor, cradling Draco’s head in his hands and kissing his lips which responded and then stilled. He moved back to see Draco’s face, stained with tears and water and blood.
“Harry?” Draco’s voice was barely a whisper now and Harry had to lean close to hear his words, “You’re never going to save the world if you can’t save me.”
“Oh gods, Draco, please…”
Harry whimpered into the rushing water and the screams of the ghosts, his wand clattering to the floor.
The light left Draco’s eyes and the rest was silence.
~
It was midnight and the Battle of Hogwarts was over.
In the sky two stars, brighter than the rest, nestled together side by side.
The world beneath them burned.
~
The terrible, beautiful, trembling heat
The darkness, the whispers, blood under his feet,
The lion, the snake, the silence and breathing,
The unbearable world he was leaving.
Two children at first, darkness and light,
Hiding with shadows in the cover of night,
The seductive and tempting raw power of sin,
Children fighting in battles no one could win.
The passion, the darkness, the whimpers and sighs
The death and destruction, the love and the lies,
The skies pouring open and crying out rain
Screaming from battle and shattering pain.
Harry and Draco and heads in the clouds
Souls in the sky and bodies in shrouds
Too young to live with the horrors of war,
Sharing the sky with the ones gone before.