Comments | holdingoff: The Voice is Silent While the Soul Screams

holdingoff

The Voice is Silent While the Soul Screams

Jun 24, 2009 10:08

Title: The Voice is Silent While the Soul Screams
Rating: R
Challenge: For the idfic Challenge at

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jack, fic, flashfic, gwen, ianto, torchwood

Comments 14

vipersweb June 24 2009, 18:55:03 UTC

This is very raw. I'm not normally a fan of 2nd person POV but you do this very well and it works nicely for me. Nice details, like Tosh's specs, in the memorial scene. I like the coda to this, with the switch to the 3rd person and the "reveal" as to who it was that went out the night before. Though, given the clues you gave in the first part, not that big a surprise. Still nice and I like the way Jack questions Ianto and how Ianto answers. very nice.

holdingoff June 25 2009, 04:52:45 UTC

2nd person is difficult, but I wanted it to be a little bit nebulous. Of course, anyone that's read stuff I wrote will easily guess that it's Ianto going out, but maybe some will be a bit more up in the air, since that was the idea- it could have easily been any of the three survivors.

I wanted Owen and Tosh to have a memorial, and the benches seemed like a good idea, along with mementos that each of the survivors most closely identify them with. I wonder how many people caught Gwen's remembering Tosh mostly through her connection to Owen.

vipersweb June 25 2009, 04:54:27 UTC

Actually, what id'ed Ianto for me was his clothes - very reminiscent in my mind at least - of what he wore in Fragments.

holdingoff June 25 2009, 05:00:32 UTC

Oh well, I couldn't fool you with leather to think it might be Jack, or skin tight to think it was Gwen...

I really did think about having it be Gwen, but then I remembered that she is always Miss ID and it wouldn't have the same impact as Ianto-the-Super Ego cutting loose.

Thread 5

thrace_adams June 24 2009, 20:04:15 UTC

This was well done as always. Very raw and emotional. And the interchange between Jack and Ianto at the end...kinda struck me as very sad. Great job!

holdingoff June 25 2009, 04:58:33 UTC

Thanks.

We were dealing with the ID, which purely instinct driven and out for pleasure (or release) and we never see Ianto as a slave to his ID. If anything, he's the archetype for the Super-ego, the self-regulator of all desires.

Kind of like putting a lid on a volcano, sometimes you have to release the pressure.

Ianto and Jack's interaction was supposed to be sad (glad that came through) since I was trying to make it clear that Ianto was literally at the breaking point where his ID would have broken through and he wouldn't want that, not when he needed to get through the memorial.

So he released the pressure valve.

hab318princess June 26 2009, 18:14:24 UTC

loved that

holdingoff June 27 2009, 07:11:50 UTC

glad you read it. apparently when i get dark people tend to run away.

hab318princess June 27 2009, 09:11:18 UTC

hey, dark can be good!

holdingoff June 27 2009, 12:00:18 UTC

Just like Ianto, sometimes you have to vent the pressure before it explodes.

tiggerbrasilf August 8 2009, 16:27:44 UTC

Oooh interesting (:

reddevilpoes November 27 2009, 07:27:33 UTC

this is really good and insightful (is that the correct word?) So Ianto to recognise the raw need to reduce the pressure. Even though these things are all mind and spirit, the workings of this story are comparing to mechanics..
Th really sad bit in this is the fact that Jack cannot help him in this.
But a good story, very close to home...