Bombalurina, CATS the Musical
A queen with red fur saunters into the Sorting Hall and looks around. Nah. Not impressed. She stretches out languidly and begins to wash. When the questions come she says her answers rather than writing them down. It's hard to write with paws, you know.
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
Honey, I have never been able to settle for just one of anything. Why should dairy products be any different?
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
Awfully violent... I don’t know these people, darling, and I’m not into killing anyway. Except from in my own personal way, but so far no one has complained. *wink*
3. What time is it where you are?
Can’t be bothered with time, honestly. It’s here and now. That’s all I’m interested in.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
This is my kind of question, obviously! Well now, none of these are cats, are they? No matter. Well, Sirius Black has that sort of... animal thing going on, you know? He’ll do in a pinch. But then of course there’s him, what’s-his-name... Kingsley Shacklebolt. He’s got something that’s very... rawr. *thoughtfully* Mmm, and there’s an assortment of Weasley brothers too, not to forget... I do have a thing for redheads. *purrs* How I'd harass them? My little secret, darling.
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
Oh, I don’t know... It would be a place where you can just... let loose, you know? Let out the inner beast. And there would be dancing, with a lot of bumping and grinding... I wouldn’t be a bartender, though. Maybe an erotic dancer... I have been told I do that well. *pause* What was the question? Oh, a name. Right. Well, I’d call it The Scarlet Ballerina. It has a ring to it.
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Oh, are you ever asking the wrong queen... Honey, I don’t have a mate, and I don’t plan on dancing that dance seriously anytime soon. Apart from quite possibly Tugger, I have yet to find one who can keep up with me. Life’s too damn short for just one mate. Harry should forget about the marriage, try them both... What the hell, try every Weasley, see if anyone strikes his fancy.
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
Smart? Me? I’m afraid not. Thinking was never my strength, darling. *pause* Though here it’s pretty obvious... I’d say it’s either one of those two thieves. Mungojerrie and that other one. The female one. Can’t be bothered to remember her name.
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
I beg your pardon? I think I’m a little insulted. I have excellent surviving skills, and a talent for getting myself out of trouble. (How else would I have been able to get close enough to Macavity to know that he cheats at cards?) Being a cat, I am also naturally skilled at singing and dancing. Of course, I do have some other abilities... *smirks slowly* But unless you’re a cat, you will just have to take my word for it. Or ask Tugger. He’ll vouch for me.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe.
I’m afraid I don’t have much to offer... Material things aren’t my thing. *looks around, find a few items on the floor next to her, much to her surprise* Hey, look at that! Let’s see, we have a rubber mouse *bats at it with a paw*, a piece of string with a feather on the end, and some human thing that I think is called a lipstick. It’s something. Oh, and I can offer some advice when it comes to toms too. *winks* Or any males really, it can’t be that big a difference...
"I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. ____Bombalurina________
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. ___ Bombalurina ________.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers whiskers in a bunch. ___ Bombalurina ________.
One day, marmalade will rule the world. ____ Bombalurina ____"
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
Honey, I have never been able to settle for just one of anything. Why should dairy products be any different?
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
Awfully violent... I don’t know these people, darling, and I’m not into killing anyway. Except from in my own personal way, but so far no one has complained. *wink*
3. What time is it where you are?
Can’t be bothered with time, honestly. It’s here and now. That’s all I’m interested in.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
This is my kind of question, obviously! Well now, none of these are cats, are they? No matter. Well, Sirius Black has that sort of... animal thing going on, you know? He’ll do in a pinch. But then of course there’s him, what’s-his-name... Kingsley Shacklebolt. He’s got something that’s very... rawr. *thoughtfully* Mmm, and there’s an assortment of Weasley brothers too, not to forget... I do have a thing for redheads. *purrs* How I'd harass them? My little secret, darling.
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
Oh, I don’t know... It would be a place where you can just... let loose, you know? Let out the inner beast. And there would be dancing, with a lot of bumping and grinding... I wouldn’t be a bartender, though. Maybe an erotic dancer... I have been told I do that well. *pause* What was the question? Oh, a name. Right. Well, I’d call it The Scarlet Ballerina. It has a ring to it.
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Oh, are you ever asking the wrong queen... Honey, I don’t have a mate, and I don’t plan on dancing that dance seriously anytime soon. Apart from quite possibly Tugger, I have yet to find one who can keep up with me. Life’s too damn short for just one mate. Harry should forget about the marriage, try them both... What the hell, try every Weasley, see if anyone strikes his fancy.
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
Smart? Me? I’m afraid not. Thinking was never my strength, darling. *pause* Though here it’s pretty obvious... I’d say it’s either one of those two thieves. Mungojerrie and that other one. The female one. Can’t be bothered to remember her name.
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
I beg your pardon? I think I’m a little insulted. I have excellent surviving skills, and a talent for getting myself out of trouble. (How else would I have been able to get close enough to Macavity to know that he cheats at cards?) Being a cat, I am also naturally skilled at singing and dancing. Of course, I do have some other abilities... *smirks slowly* But unless you’re a cat, you will just have to take my word for it. Or ask Tugger. He’ll vouch for me.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe.
I’m afraid I don’t have much to offer... Material things aren’t my thing. *looks around, find a few items on the floor next to her, much to her surprise* Hey, look at that! Let’s see, we have a rubber mouse *bats at it with a paw*, a piece of string with a feather on the end, and some human thing that I think is called a lipstick. It’s something. Oh, and I can offer some advice when it comes to toms too. *winks* Or any males really, it can’t be that big a difference...
"I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. ____Bombalurina________
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. ___ Bombalurina ________.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers whiskers in a bunch. ___ Bombalurina ________.
One day, marmalade will rule the world. ____ Bombalurina ____"