Lisa. Girl, Interrupted.
*Re-worked some answers and re-posted from a few days ago*
Application
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
You're asking me about cheese? Go and ask one of the fucking anorexics in my ward, they'll think they've gained a few pounds just thinking about it. Just watch their fingers twitch... Hahaha.
But hey, while we're on the subject, I like cream cheese. Creamy.
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop? I don't give a fuck about either. Let's shove them in a room and wait and see which one kills the other first. Then I'll kill the winner and eat their corpses. Hahaha.
3. What time is it where you are? Time for you to open your fucking eyes and look at the clock on the wall behind you.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
Albus who-now? No idea what you're talking about...what drugs they giving you? But sexual harrassment... hmm. Tell me what I'm dealing with first haha. *she takes a cigarette from a her pocket and lights it.*
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
Dark Corner. Or something. Covers all manner of sins, know what I mean? Yeah. It'll be dark, with green flourescent lighting tubes around the bar area. And all kinds of liquour. Smokey. And big black leather sofas. I like that. *takes a drag of her cigarette.*
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Again, Harry who? Well, unless they're like children or anything, why shouldn't he marry both. Double the fun! That's what I'd do. Although I'd take all three. *grins*
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
Well why don't you do your fucking work then? That's the way the world works. You do your job, 8 hours a day, despise every minute of it, you come home, all crabby and fall out with whoever is at home, and you go to sleep and you repeat the next day. Over and over and over. The same drone. Until the end of the month, when you're one step away from becoming a fucking lunatic, and you get a nice fat paycheck to tide yourself over. So you have a drink and you feel a little bit better, and more normal. And the same thing starts over and over again. Fuck that.
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
I managed to bust out of my cage, plenty of times. Security in there might as well be paper chains. I can also get guys to do whatever I want, which can come in handy. I know my way around. Good grades? Who needs 'em. What you need is a good, smart head and you'll get by.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
Let me see, well I aint got much on me, let me see... 4 cigarettes, ten dollars, and a pack of chewing gum. If any of that crap interests you. You can't have my lighter though, that's my one prized posession. It's got Cinderella on it, and it's glittery. *grins*. I can also get you pretty much whatever you want. I don't have to steal things, if there's a guy working there I can manage to get anything from him, simply using my charm. *she laughs and takes another draw of her cigarette.* Yeah.
Application
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
You're asking me about cheese? Go and ask one of the fucking anorexics in my ward, they'll think they've gained a few pounds just thinking about it. Just watch their fingers twitch... Hahaha.
But hey, while we're on the subject, I like cream cheese. Creamy.
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop? I don't give a fuck about either. Let's shove them in a room and wait and see which one kills the other first. Then I'll kill the winner and eat their corpses. Hahaha.
3. What time is it where you are? Time for you to open your fucking eyes and look at the clock on the wall behind you.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
Albus who-now? No idea what you're talking about...what drugs they giving you? But sexual harrassment... hmm. Tell me what I'm dealing with first haha. *she takes a cigarette from a her pocket and lights it.*
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
Dark Corner. Or something. Covers all manner of sins, know what I mean? Yeah. It'll be dark, with green flourescent lighting tubes around the bar area. And all kinds of liquour. Smokey. And big black leather sofas. I like that. *takes a drag of her cigarette.*
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Again, Harry who? Well, unless they're like children or anything, why shouldn't he marry both. Double the fun! That's what I'd do. Although I'd take all three. *grins*
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
Well why don't you do your fucking work then? That's the way the world works. You do your job, 8 hours a day, despise every minute of it, you come home, all crabby and fall out with whoever is at home, and you go to sleep and you repeat the next day. Over and over and over. The same drone. Until the end of the month, when you're one step away from becoming a fucking lunatic, and you get a nice fat paycheck to tide yourself over. So you have a drink and you feel a little bit better, and more normal. And the same thing starts over and over again. Fuck that.
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
I managed to bust out of my cage, plenty of times. Security in there might as well be paper chains. I can also get guys to do whatever I want, which can come in handy. I know my way around. Good grades? Who needs 'em. What you need is a good, smart head and you'll get by.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
Let me see, well I aint got much on me, let me see... 4 cigarettes, ten dollars, and a pack of chewing gum. If any of that crap interests you. You can't have my lighter though, that's my one prized posession. It's got Cinderella on it, and it's glittery. *grins*. I can also get you pretty much whatever you want. I don't have to steal things, if there's a guy working there I can manage to get anything from him, simply using my charm. *she laughs and takes another draw of her cigarette.* Yeah.