Application for Snow White, Fables (Vertigo Comics)
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
I have always been fond of goat cheese. It reminds me of my childhood in the Homelands, when it was just my sister and I, before everything went to Hellhappened.
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
Barney. Even my children dislike that purple monstrosity.
3. What time is it where you are?
3:45 p.m.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
I take it whoever wrote this question has never been sexually harassed themselves? Believe me, it is not a fun experience although I did receive the position of Deputy Mayor due to Crane’s wandering hands.
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
The Magic Mirror. Drink until your reflection tells you that you are the fairest in the land.
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Harry should marry the twin that is least likely to cheat on him with his sister.
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
You need a competent assistant. That way, your assistant can take of the minor paper work, leaving only the important and/or urgent paperwork for yourself. Assistants reduce stress and increase efficiency. However, if your paperwork problem persists, you may want to consider stepping down from your position. Your inability to complete your paperwork is probably a sign that you are not capable to do your job in a way that is beneficial to those who are affected by your work.
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
I was the Deputy Mayor of Fabletown for several centuries, and the advisor to then-Mayor Cole. I, along with Sher my lo the father of my associate Bigby Wolf, was responsible for the death of Goldilocks, an enemy of Fabletown and all-around psycho bitch. I also survived a bullet to the head. I do not die easily.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe.
Even though I am currently lodged at the Farm, I still wield some influence in Fabletown. Let me know what you want, and if I can locate it, I will get it for you as long as it is not one of the town’s treasures.